Comment On May the Sad Force Be With You

A long, long time ago, in a software shop far, far away, clouds of bad management began to gather. The evil CEO, in his hooded shroud, commanded a dearth of Darth's that a powerful sphere-of-influence be built to help enforce His will. Rules and regulations would abound. Roles would be restricted. The twin suns were obscured and darkness covered the land. [expand full text]
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Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 06:34 • by Fred Fristone (unregistered)
Looks like that code is a POS.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 06:51 • by Captcha:suscipere (unregistered)
Please let's not fill the comments section with sad emoticons. :c

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 06:53 • by QJo (unregistered)
':-D'

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 06:54 • by toot (unregistered)
Is it just me or is the grammar all over the place in this one?

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 06:57 • by toot (unregistered)
411481 in reply to 411480
*grammer

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 07:07 • by RaceProUK
411482 in reply to 411480
toot:
Is it just me or is the grammar all over the place in this one?

Correct grammar this story has.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 07:28 • by Jo (unregistered)
Wow. The "AS x" part consistently wrapped to the wrong line, for no good reason at all.
If that was the influence of the Dark Emperor, then it fits; if it was the works of young SQLwalker, then he wouldn't be better than his father.

Morals: The only sure bet about rebellion is that manners get worse. Otherwise, it's usually just figurehead shuffling.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 07:42 • by justsomedudette (unregistered)
I have a sudden urge to create a role id of :( unfortunately all mine are ints but some day, some how this needs to be the code for a manager role.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 07:52 • by Bob (unregistered)
"commanded a dearth of Darth's that" If there weren't any Darths how did any of them own a "that"?

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 08:00 • by Steve The Cynic
411486 in reply to 411485
Bob:
"commanded a dearth of Darth's that" If there weren't any Darths how did any of them own a "that"?

wikt:dearth:
dearth (plural dearths)

1 (Can we clean up(+) this sense?) A period or condition when food is rare and hence expensive; famine.
2 (by extension) Scarcity; a lack or short supply.  [quotations ▼]
3 (obsolete) Dearness; the quality of being rare or costly.  [quotations ▼]

So, while there weren't enough Darths, there were some. And the few that there were owned "that".

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 08:23 • by Peter (unregistered)
411488 in reply to 411481
toot:
*grammer
No, you were right first time. The correct spelling is "grammar".

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 08:26 • by Peter (unregistered)
411489 in reply to 411480
toot:
Is it just me or is the grammar all over the place in this one?
Some of the sentences are a little difficult to parse, but I think that they're all grammatically correct.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 08:29 • by Krunt (unregistered)
411490 in reply to 411488
Peter:
toot:
*grammer
No, you were right first time. The correct spelling is "grammar".


I think that was supposed to be the joke...

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 08:44 • by Foo Bar (unregistered)
411491 in reply to 411485
Dearth is the collective noun for dark Jedi.

You can have a murder of crows, a squad of squid, or a dearth of darths.

Also, darths are rarely found in groups larger than two (because they advance in rank via fratricide) so dearth is entirely appropriate.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 08:46 • by Anon (unregistered)
". . .unfortunately all mine are ints . . ." 0x3A28 == 14888. Well within the range of an int.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 08:53 • by Anonymouse
▌─────────────────────────▐█─────▐
▌────▄──────────────────▄█▓█▌────▐
▌───▐██▄───────────────▄▓░░▓▓────▐
▌───▐█░██▓────────────▓▓░░░▓▌────▐
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Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 09:01 • by Nutster
It was a time a great sadness. You can tell because the WHERE clause tells you by referencing a particular emoticon primary key and the FROM clause has totally messed up whitespace. If you are going to break the FROM clause into multiple lines you could break it at the JOINs or even the ON, but never at the AS!

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 09:03 • by Steve The Cynic
411495 in reply to 411491
Foo Bar:
Dearth is the collective noun for dark Jedi.

You can have a murder of crows, a squad of squid, or a dearth of darths.

Also, darths are rarely found in groups larger than two (because they advance in rank via fratricide) so dearth is entirely appropriate.

More appropriately, by dominicide. (Slaying of one's master / lord, although given the nature of the Sith, "tyrannicide", the slaying of a tyrant, might be appropriate at the highest levels.)

Fratricide is for removing the competition. (By origin, "fratricide" refers to the slaying of a brother, just as patricide is slaying of the killer's father, filicide is the slaying of one's own child, and infanticide is more generally the slaying of any child. So fratricide would involve eliminating those at the same level as yourself, so that they don't compete with you anymore. To take your superior's job (implied in "advance in rank"), you have to kill him. Fratricide only helps if you need to eliminate a colleague who is ahead of you in the race.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 09:04 • by wat (unregistered)
I'm not usually a grammar nazi (for instance, firefox's spell check just helpfully reminded me how to spell "grammar"), but that was horrible. Figuring out wtf the article was trying to say wasn't nearly worth the payoff.

Hurry up and edit dat shiat before any more people read it >_>

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 09:06 • by DonaldK (unregistered)
I like it! Using emoticons to denote access levels.... brillant (sic), I tell you, brillant (sic)!!

So the tri-state boolean operator becomes:

true = :-)
null or FILE_NOT_FOUND = :-|
false = :-(

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 09:14 • by RoadieRich (unregistered)
But how do you distinguish null from FILE_NOT_FOUND?

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 09:15 • by eVil (unregistered)
WTF has this gotta do with star wars?

And, did you think dearth mean something else, because its a really weird (e.g. bad) choice of word in that sentence?

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 09:19 • by 50% Opacity (unregistered)
411501 in reply to 411486
Steve The Cynic:
Bob:
"commanded a dearth of Darth's that" If there weren't any Darths how did any of them own a "that"?

wikt:dearth:
dearth (plural dearths)

1 (Can we clean up(+) this sense?) A period or condition when food is rare and hence expensive; famine.
2 (by extension) Scarcity; a lack or short supply.  [quotations ▼]
3 (obsolete) Dearness; the quality of being rare or costly.  [quotations ▼]

So, while there weren't enough Darths, there were some. And the few that there were owned "that".


No. There wasn't enough "that" of a guy named "Darth", but the little of "Darth's that" that was there was commanded by the evil CEO. Simple.

Captcha: praesent - this post was being written in the praesent tense.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 09:21 • by toot (unregistered)
411502 in reply to 411488
He was making a funny, I believe. It wasn't me, I haven't been assed to register "toot".

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 09:36 • by Hatshepsut

Horrible code, horribler article.

Snoofle, your editors are letting you down. (I assume you have editors, and aren't churning this tripe out yourself.)

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 09:45 • by ZoomST (unregistered)
411504 in reply to 411499
RoadieRich:
But how do you distinguish null from FILE_NOT_FOUND?
Easy: null is a broken bar or pipe "¦", meanwhile FILE_NOT_FOUND is a vertical line "|".
But I don't know how to distinguish between uppercase NULL and lowercase null. uppercase pipe, maybe?
FILE_NOT_FOUND is always uppercase, by the way.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 09:46 • by QJo (unregistered)
411505 in reply to 411499
RoadieRich:
But how do you distinguish null from FILE_NOT_FOUND?

:-O

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 10:24 • by xaade
411506 in reply to 411499
RoadieRich:
But how do you distinguish null from FILE_NOT_FOUND?


ASSERT(null == FILE_NOT_FOUND)

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 10:25 • by xaade
411507 in reply to 411502
toot:
He was making a funny, I believe. It wasn't me, I haven't been assed to register "toot".


Way to be the butt of your own joke.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 10:51 • by silent D (unregistered)
Their database security is actually based on sophisticated facial recognition software that only works if the user is frowning.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 11:08 • by AnGryC@t (unregistered)
411510 in reply to 411508
silent D:
Their database security is actually based on sophisticated facial recognition software that only works if the user is frowning.


If the user's frown is not pronounced enough a large squirt of pepper spray is delivered to the face followed by swift groin kicks from menaceBot4000

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 11:15 • by Ironside (unregistered)
411511 in reply to 411495
Steve The Cynic:
Foo Bar:
Dearth is the collective noun for dark Jedi.

You can have a murder of crows, a squad of squid, or a dearth of darths.

Also, darths are rarely found in groups larger than two (because they advance in rank via fratricide) so dearth is entirely appropriate.

More appropriately, by dominicide. (Slaying of one's master / lord, although given the nature of the Sith, "tyrannicide", the slaying of a tyrant, might be appropriate at the highest levels.)

Fratricide is for removing the competition. (By origin, "fratricide" refers to the slaying of a brother, just as patricide is slaying of the killer's father, filicide is the slaying of one's own child, and infanticide is more generally the slaying of any child. So fratricide would involve eliminating those at the same level as yourself, so that they don't compete with you anymore. To take your superior's job (implied in "advance in rank"), you have to kill him. Fratricide only helps if you need to eliminate a colleague who is ahead of you in the race.


Fascinating, but how am I supposed to use that information in any practical way ever?

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 11:18 • by KillaCoda
411513 in reply to 411511
By killing your boss?

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 11:29 • by Steve The Cynic
411514 in reply to 411511
Ironside:
Fascinating, but how am I supposed to use that information in any practical way ever?

It's hardly my place to advise you on how to usurp my position of power, is it? And if you are competing with me for a place on the next rung up, I'm hardly likely to help you there, either.

But anyway, there are several hints on how to get ahead in an organization that requires you to commit some sort of assassination in order to advance.

I could also speak of not bothering to waste time with weaklings, and of concentrating your attention on (1) the current owner of the job you want, (2) those who stand in the way, and (3) those close behind who put *you* into category (1) or (2). If you have a distaste for *fratricide*, then you have to concentrate on group (1), with the proviso that you must dispose of each member of group (2) as he becomes a member of group (1), seeing as how assassinating the member or members of group (1) is *dominicide* rather than fratricide.

And now you are on your own.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 11:30 • by Ash (unregistered)
Times are tough on Tattoine, as Luke is forced to take up the old family trade of Squirrel Walking.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 11:33 • by Chad Garrett (unregistered)
411516 in reply to 411481
toot:
*grammer


Kelsey?

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 11:39 • by Some Damn Yank
411517 in reply to 411511
Ironside:
Steve The Cynic:
Foo Bar:
Dearth is the collective noun for dark Jedi.

You can have a murder of crows, a squad of squid, or a dearth of darths.

Also, darths are rarely found in groups larger than two (because they advance in rank via fratricide) so dearth is entirely appropriate.

More appropriately, by dominicide. (Slaying of one's master / lord, although given the nature of the Sith, "tyrannicide", the slaying of a tyrant, might be appropriate at the highest levels.)

Fratricide is for removing the competition. (By origin, "fratricide" refers to the slaying of a brother, just as patricide is slaying of the killer's father, filicide is the slaying of one's own child, and infanticide is more generally the slaying of any child. So fratricide would involve eliminating those at the same level as yourself, so that they don't compete with you anymore. To take your superior's job (implied in "advance in rank"), you have to kill him. Fratricide only helps if you need to eliminate a colleague who is ahead of you in the race.

Fascinating, but how am I supposed to use that information in any practical way ever?

Clearly you don't work for a Fortune 500.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 11:43 • by Some Damn Yank
411518 in reply to 411514
Steve The Cynic:
Ironside:
Fascinating, but how am I supposed to use that information in any practical way ever?

It's hardly my place to advise you on how to usurp my position of power, is it? And if you are competing with me for a place on the next rung up, I'm hardly likely to help you there, either.

But anyway, there are several hints on how to get ahead in an organization that requires you to commit some sort of assassination in order to advance.

I could also speak of not bothering to waste time with weaklings, and of concentrating your attention on (1) the current owner of the job you want, (2) those who stand in the way, and (3) those close behind who put *you* into category (1) or (2). If you have a distaste for *fratricide*, then you have to concentrate on group (1), with the proviso that you must dispose of each member of group (2) as he becomes a member of group (1), seeing as how assassinating the member or members of group (1) is *dominicide* rather than fratricide.

And now you are on your own.

I find it more effective to help my boss take out his boss, then fill the vacancy myself before my now underling knows what happened. Of course, my first order of business is to eliminate him because he's a proven threat. The best maneuver is to have them take each other out, but that's not always possible.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 12:18 • by herby
Nothing to see here, please go away.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 12:52 • by eVil (unregistered)
Seriously though... why the Star Wars?

Does that SQL contain something that obviously suggests Star Wars as the memetic theme for this article?

Or have the site editors cunningly identified Star Wars as popular with this sites demographic, and so just shoved it into the article apropos of nothing?

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 13:31 • by Lordy (unregistered)
Reminds me of the horrible output from cdparanoia

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 13:44 • by The Sauce (unregistered)
Upon reading the summary, I was a little confused and rather annoyed. I felt it was mostly pointless filler text.

Then I read the code.

My opinion of the summary was changed.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 14:40 • by Bananas (unregistered)
411523 in reply to 411497
DonaldK:
I like it! Using emoticons to denote access levels.... brillant (sic), I tell you, brillant (sic)!!

So the quad-state boolean operator becomes:

true = :-)
mostlytrue = ;-)
null or FILE_NOT_FOUND = :-|
false = :-(

FTFY.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 14:52 • by anonymous (unregistered)
411524 in reply to 411523
Bananas:
DonaldK:
I like it! Using emoticons to denote access levels.... brillant (sic), I tell you, brillant (sic)!!

So the quint-state boolean operator becomes:

true = :-)
mostlytrue = ;-)
null or FILE_NOT_FOUND = :-|
almostfalse = :-\
false = :-(

FTFY.

FTHFFY (fixed that half fix for you)

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 15:13 • by Eric (unregistered)
Dearth: Lack, scarcity, shortage

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 16:32 • by da Doctah
411527 in reply to 411525
I am become Dearth, destroyer of humor.

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 16:55 • by qbolec (unregistered)
I need to know what values permId can have, given that permission is the real id used for joins. Is permId a string? Also, since permId is shorter than perm_id by one letter, can I safely assume that emoticons have no noses? :)

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 16:58 • by qbolec (unregistered)
also, am I the only one who is more puzzled by constants 123, 456, 789 and P, O, S, than by :, -, ) ?

Could someone draw me a diagram of this database?

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 17:26 • by ¯\(°_o)/¯ I DUNNO LOL (unregistered)
411530 in reply to 411497
DonaldK:
true = :-)
null or FILE_NOT_FOUND = :-|
false = :-(

But wait, there's more! You can also flip them around for antimatter booleans!

anti-true = (-:
anti-false = )-:
anti-FILE_NOT_FOUND = |-:

In fact, there's no limit to what you can do!

very-true = (-)
very-false = )-(
imperial-tie-fighter = ]-*-[
oh-fuck-it = (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

Re: May the Sad Force Be With You

2013-07-01 17:53 • by the power of Grayskull (unregistered)
411531 in reply to 411530
¯\(°_o)/¯ I DUNNO LOL:
DonaldK:
true = :-)
null or FILE_NOT_FOUND = :-|
false = :-(

But wait, there's more! You can also flip them around for antimatter booleans!

anti-true = (-:
anti-false = )-:
anti-FILE_NOT_FOUND = |-:

In fact, there's no limit to what you can do!

very-true = (-)
very-false = )-(
imperial-tie-fighter = ]-*-[
oh-fuck-it = (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻


Me: "Can we update the character set of this table from latin1 to utf-8?"

DBA: "That has potentially serious consequences and we'd have to look at the data currently there. Why do you want to?"

Me: "Um, we're adding some new user, uh roles."
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