Comment On Science Fiction Tried to Warn Us!

engrish strikes again

My sarcasm radar is going off the chart !!

CAPTCHA: pinball

Apparently, this program only accepts 'non-useful' file formats.

Looks like some sort of half-assed attempt at a haiku, except the first line is too long.

the real wtf?
in form it is a haiku-
That is not sarcasm.

I could have sworn he was going for a haiku.

your icon is not
a type that I recognize
please try another

You just have to pronounce 'format' as one syllable. You can do it!

Or pronounce 'a' in zero syllables! You can do it too!

Not quite a Haiku though

I always learned 575 - not 675... But that could be a bad translation as well

I think we've all learned something useful from this:

Coders don't make good poets.

Defining a haiku as a 5-7-5 poem is a little like defining a computer as a box that hums and blinks.

JelloGoesWiggle:

I think we've all learned something useful from this:

Coders don't make good poets.

In fairness though, most poets don't make good poets either.

A file of that type?
It might be very useful.
Here it will not work.

There I fixed it right.
No more WTF for you.
Wait till tomorrow.

Looks like japaneese hokku :)

Ben:

Defining a haiku as a 5-7-5 poem is a little like defining a computer as a box that hums and blinks.

Yes, necessary but not sufficient.

Reminds me of an error (attributable to me, alas) that was floating around for a while: "That won't work on this puny chassis." More entertainingly, one of the other developers would get bombarded by this message while working, and didn't know why he kept getting told he had a puny chassis. I nearly laughed myself out of my chair when he described trying to work while keep getting told "That won't work on this puny chassis" on the console he was typing on.

and most coders are not good coders

I wrote a couple Subversion commit log messages in Haiku in a project a few months ago:

refactoring
cbi_doStuff was long
not as much now

(cbi_doStuff was the wonderful name one of our functions had. It was similar in concept to a main function though, hence the vague name. Actually, reading this again, looks like I got the number of syllables wrong.)

the CBI stuff
that was in main.cc
now has its own file

parsing file.c
makes file.instr.i with
instrumented code

darren:

and most coders are not good coders

True, but I'd still rather listen to a poem by a coder than use code by a poet.

Nothing to say
so I simply echo
the captcha test: smile!

You huge nerd. But still very cool. :)

The first thing that entered my mind was the bad text adventures that when you tried to do something perfectly normal that the coder hadn't expected, it would give you a "That won't help you."

I thought I've seen something like this before. From Snopes, although a google on haiku error messages will return lots of variants.

Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.

Program aborting:
Close all that you have worked on.
You ask far too much.

Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.

A crash reduces
Your expensive computer
To a simple stone.

You step in the stream,
But the water has moved on.
This page is not here.

Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.

Having been erased,
The document you're seeking
Must now be retyped.

Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.

I liked the old name
"Worse Than Failure" is worse than
Doubleyou-tee-eff

Short, simple and to the point. At least it said the format COULD be useful instead of a bad insult.

That file you keep loading -- I do not think it contains what you think it contains...

"robocalypse", LOL. All hail Skynet!

Im sorry, Master;
I can't let you do that.
Heh heh heh heh

Perl has had a Coy module (analogous to Carp) since like 1998 or so. It attempts to print out haiku error messages by building a haiku from the error message you provide.

To quote the documentation from http://search.cpan.org/~dconway/Coy-0.05/ :

Error messages
strewn across my terminal.
A vein starts to throb.

Their reproof adds the
injury of insult to
the shame of failure.

When a program dies
what you need is a moment
of serenity.

The Coy.pm
module brings tranquillity
to your debugging.

The module alters
the behavior of die and
warn (and croak and carp).

Like Carp.pm,
Coy reports errors from the
caller's point of view.

But it prefaces
the bad news of failure with
a soothing poem.

Feel better now?

I think the reason it looks like a haiku is that it's based off another haiku that's been floating around the Internet.

A file that big?
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.

Ironically enough...

Isn't that a new style of coding... "Yoda Code"?

Other error messages include "Use the force you knob", but only in Canada

I knew Luca Turilli was right! Take that, obscure references!

Yummy.... captcha.

Should have been

a file like that
...

Sono fairu?
Omoshirosou ga
Koko ja dame.

As I read that (Haiku), I could hear YODA's voice speaking those words!!

this is so human sarcasm

We wrote a bunch of 'Beautiful Errors' a few years back that are similar:

The Web site you seek
cannot be located but
endless others exist

Stay the patient course
Of little worth is your ire
The network is down

Login incorrect.
Only perfect spellers may
enter this system.

This query fails you
Databases are fickle
and quite unforgiving

You have no access
Go find some place else to hack
write protection joy

To have no errors
Would be life without meaning
No struggle, no joy

I'm sure you've all seen it, but I had to chip in a favorite or two:

With searching comes loss
And the presence of absence:
Your file is not found.

Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.

How about a new one just for this site?

Boolean logic
Is normally true and false
and file not found

All it took was one
Error message as a poem
Now the floodgate's open.

All your icons are belong to us!

Captcha: ninjas - yeah, they all are japanese.

BTW, don't ever forget:

http://static.kdenews.org/mirrors/malte.homeip.net/base.swf

public class paula bean
public string get paula bean
return brillant

Site Worse Than Failure
Was once DailyWTF
Never should have changed

Discretion is
The better part of valor.
Courageous "Cancel"!

-Harrow.

O dear I'd like a "mod parent funny"-function right now.

And yet, no one has mentioned BeOS?

hacked email plays tricks
leaves virus in my inbox
my mac does not care

In the late 90's, there was a web browser on BeOS that used haiku like the one mentioned in the fine article as its error messages. It was quite entertaining.