• eznme (unregistered)

    Frist is 'deadline' in german

    capture validus: so true.

  • (cs)

    He couldn't have gotten a free word processor before that?

  • Pippo (unregistered)

    Whats wrong with Notepad?

    CAPTCHA: odio, oh well

  • Truckers delight (unregistered) in reply to Dogsworth
    Dogsworth:
    He couldn't have gotten a free word processor before that?

    Are you trying to ruin this shit_that_didn't_happen.txt with common sense?

  • (cs)

    This reminds me of my girlfriends new job. They have the best computers you can buy at apple - but they are too cheap to buy Office. Currently they are toying around with libre office and my Girlfriend burned a full day for a task, which had been 5 Minutes with MSO or the apple pendant. This time alone cost more than an MSO license for the whole firm... Additionally: The CEO does not like windows because it is "too slow" - and then constantly points at the one PC at the office who runs Windows and constantly crashes. My girlfriend examined the PC: Windows XP with no service pack, old as hell and on C:\ there are 500 Bytes of disk space free, while D:\ has 500Gb available...

  • Dhamp (unregistered)

    ...

    So it was a physical version of every QMS over 3 months old?

  • anonymous_coder() (unregistered)

    Ah, the 'big idea' business owners. Who are terrified that someone will steal their 'big idea' and leave them with nothing.

    Worked for too many of them, and have the grey hairs, receding hairline, and ulcers to prove it.

    Give me project managers, and QA, and development milestones, and HR, and a real office with computer desks and working A/C any day.

    captcha: iusto, as in iusto work for people like this...

  • olaf (unregistered)

    So whats wrong with Wordpad? The one supplied with Windows 7/8 covers most of Words most-used features anyway...

  • Bob (unregistered)

    What are they going to do with Word specifically? Insert pictures of sticky notes on whiteboards?

    If they're on Windows 8 then there's a lot of other (free!) platforms available much better suited to documentation.

  • (cs) in reply to Bob
    Bob:
    What are they going to do with Word specifically? Insert pictures of sticky notes on whiteboards?
    Clearly they should move the sticky notes from the whiteboards to a wooden table.
  • Bob (unregistered)

    Documentation in Word? I'd have fired her.

    Also, is it Jason or Ross?

  • Balu (unregistered) in reply to HerrDerSchatten
    HerrDerSchatten:
    my Girlfriend burned a full day and now she's blaming LibreOffice for it

    FTFY.

  • (cs)

    Nothing better for work confidence than finding your manager/product owner/ceo crying in a corner for a bunch of post-its.

    Would I be crazy to think this is how Peter Molyneux started?

    Oh! And the name of the game is Duke Nukem Forever 2.

  • (cs)

    The Real WTF here is taking the job without finding out what they are actually developing; asking some basic questions in the interview would have probably shown all the red flags.

    Dev: "So tell me what you're developing? What kind of game?"

    Clueless Moron Owner: Umm... well it has big guns in it. And lots of action!

    Dev: So you have no idea at all? Thanks, but no thanks. Call me back when you actually have some clue what you're doing.

  • Anonymous Paranoiac (unregistered) in reply to ObiWayneKenobi
    ObiWayneKenobi:
    The Real WTF here is taking the job without finding out what they are actually developing; asking some basic questions in the interview would have probably shown all the red flags.

    Dev: "So tell me what you're developing? What kind of game?"

    Clueless Moron Owner: Umm... well it has big guns in it. And lots of action!

    Dev: So you have no idea at all? Thanks, but no thanks. Call me back when you actually have some clue what you're doing.

    Probably went more like: Wide-Eyed College Grad: You mean I can get in on the ground floor of the next Valve?

    Clueless Moron Owner: That's right! In fact, we're currently working on the next blockbuster game title!

    Wide-Eyed College Grad: Wow, that's amazing! Can you tell me more about it?

    Clueless Moron Owner: Well, you know, with all the corporate espionage in this industry, I can't reveal too much (whispers We had a guy from UbiSoft snooping around here just last week...), but I can tell you, it will have big guns and lots of action!

    Wide-Eyed College Grad: gasp When can I sign up??

  • M-x org-mode (unregistered)

    I suppose that some anonymization was made and Word stays for more costly software.

    To take notes one could use a simple editor, or a rater complex editor like emacs that has modes specifically made to take notes and to-do list. Emacs is free as speech and runs from almost any operating system.

    Or, if tou're 2.0 and like sticky notes, there's Google Keep...

  • Mike (unregistered)

    Say you update office every 3 years. That works out to about $0.50 a day per person that does documentation. If the documentation isn't worth that to you then it shouldn't be worth it to pay their salaries either.

    To beat the same drum as everyone else: notepad, wordpad, LaTex, LibreOffice etc etc.

  • (cs) in reply to Balu

    Nope - she burned a day because Libre Office Impress cannot groupd shapes together, so that aligning them is a pain. Also, it series printing function is crap.

  • (cs) in reply to M-x org-mode
    M-x org-mode:
    I suppose that some anonymization was made and Word stays for more costly software.

    To take notes one could use a simple editor, or a rater complex editor like emacs that has modes specifically made to take notes and to-do list. Emacs is free as speech and runs from almost any operating system.

    Or, if tou're 2.0 and like sticky notes, there's Google Keep...

    What?

    Seriously?

    What?

  • John (unregistered) in reply to HerrDerSchatten
    HerrDerSchatten:
    Libre Office Impress cannot groupd shapes together.
    https://help.libreoffice.org/Impress/Modify#Group Unless you actually meant "groupd", and that's some sort of grouping daemon that is somehow related to MS Office.
  • EvilSnack (unregistered)

    We should define a string table for our comments. It could save us some typing.

    STRINGTABLE BEGIN IDS_FRIST "FRIST!" IDS_DISBELIEF_SUSPENDED "The following comment assumes this all really happened as we are being led to believe." IDS_TDPHB "This looks just like another daily pointy-haired boss." IDS_TYPICAL_STARTUP "Another brush with a half-assed start-up." IDS_SPARTACUS "I'm %s!" IDS_LIFE_OF_BRIAN "I'm %s, and so's my wife!" END

    MessageBox(IDS_DISBELIEF_SUSPENDED); MessageBox(IDS_TYPICAL_STARTUP);

    Captcha veniam: "Not the artery, but the veniam."

  • Billy T (unregistered)

    Theres a little known editor that comes with all new Windows computers free of charge called Paint that allows you to put images, text even shapes into documents. Its hidden away in the accessories page of the start menu but it is on every Windows computer i have ever worked with. it took me a bit longer to master it than word or excel but now i am reaping the rewards.

    like i said its absolutely free you dont need ms office to run it and it has its own text input box to write text. Unlike word and excel you can put text and images wherever you want on the page. there are literally no rules you can even make text overlap and draw freehand and the document can be expanded to whatever size you want. also unlike word documents even people with macbooks can open paint documents you email them. if you are beginner at IT I would say learn word and excel first (although excel is really optional depending on what kind of work you are doing, use the right tool for the right job)

  • (cs)

    Who is Jason?

  • (cs)
    When the owner, an old man named Brad, had offered her a position after spotting her in a student computer lab, she thought he was crazy

    TRWTF - this. If they seem crazy even before you start working for them, you really think it's going to get better?

  • Billy T (unregistered) in reply to HerrDerSchatten
    HerrDerSchatten:
    Nope - she burned a day because Libre Office Impress cannot groupd shapes together, so that aligning them is a pain. Also, it series printing function is crap.

    has she tried microsoft paint? it has shapes and you can move things easily and print. not sure what you mean by grouping shapes together. do you mean something to do with the copy paste?

  • (cs) in reply to ubersoldat
    ubersoldat:
    Would I be crazy to think this is how Peter Molyneux started?
    Yes. He started exporting baked beans. There's a highly entertaining video where he talks about it somewhere (IGN?)
  • AnonCoward23 (unregistered)

    I've been grouping shapes with LibreOffice back when it was still called StarOffice, in the 1990s.

  • (cs) in reply to Billy T

    Paint whould even more time - did you never buld rather complex presentations?

  • C-Derb (unregistered)

    Google Docs??

  • ¯\(°_o)/¯ I DUNNO LOL (unregistered) in reply to Pippo
    Pippo:
    Whats wrong with Notepad?
    Because you can't rearrange the pages without ripping them out first, silly! Also, they still won't stick to anything.

    He should have upgraded to Cork Board and Push Pins. Now that's some cutting edge humidity-resistant technology!

  • michael (unregistered)

    I started for a very high-flying investment w^Hbank in 2008 working on one of their trading systems. Me: "Oh, where is the documentation so I know what's going on?" Colleague David:"Ah. Do you have an A4 sheet for me, so I can draw how it all hangs together".

  • RichE (unregistered)

    I once worked for an engineering firm whose President (doctorate) ignored the white-boards and wrote his notes directly on the wall. They were moisture resistant, but edits would have required a drywall saw.

  • Matt (unregistered)

    Let me guess--the money he had budgeted for Office went to cocaine instead?

  • trtrwtf (unregistered) in reply to Bob
    Bob:
    Documentation in Word? I'd have fired her.

    Damn straight. If you need to generate customer-facing prettydocs, Flare works great. If you're doing internal-facing stuff, preserving institutional memory against the inevitable "Jim gets hired by a bus/hit by google" scenario, then often a well-curated wiki will be the best thing.

    Using Word for documentation is indeed the real WTF

  • (cs)

    Didn't know what the title of the game was? Me either, but I'm guessing it's something like "Delude Yourself Into Believing That You're Actually Creating Something".

  • (cs) in reply to trtrwtf
    trtrwtf:
    Bob:
    Documentation in Word? I'd have fired her.

    Damn straight. If you need to generate customer-facing prettydocs, Flare works great. If you're doing internal-facing stuff, preserving institutional memory against the inevitable "Jim gets hired by a bus/hit by google" scenario, then often a well-curated wiki will be the best thing.

    Using Word for documentation is indeed the real WTF

    I'm going to play the devil's advocate here.

    Anita was a developer. It wasn't her job to know what Flare is, or even how a wiki works, unless she was told "the documentation is in Flare/this wiki, here is how you access it". It was her job to read whatever form of documentation was provided and turn it into code.

    Naturally, she would have picked up an idea of how it's supposed to be done if she worked at a properly-organized company for a while, but she was fresh out of college, so it's hardly fair to expect her to be the expert. She didn't know what documentation tools exist. All she knew was the Post-Its sucked.

    If the boss man didn't have anyone who knew that his Post-Its are fucking retarded (and using Word would have been almost as bad), it's really his fault for not hiring that person. But, given his affinity for Post-Its even when told they were impossible, he probably didn't want to hire that person.

  • 3.3 Million (unregistered) in reply to Matt

    I don't Brad was actually Tim Schaffer.

  • 3.3 Million (unregistered) in reply to Matt
    Matt:
    Let me guess--the money he had budgeted for Office went to cocaine instead?
    3.3 Million:
    I don't Brad was actually Tim Schaffer.

    Meant to quote, not reply.

  • trtrwtf (unregistered) in reply to anotherusername
    anotherusername:
    I'm going to play the devil's advocate here.

    Anita was a developer. It wasn't her job to know what Flare is, or even how a wiki works, unless she was told "the documentation is in Flare/this wiki, here is how you access it". It was her job to read whatever form of documentation was provided and turn it into code.

    Okay, I'll buy that. Even Word would be better than the post-it system, that's true enough.

  • Dan (unregistered) in reply to anotherusername
    anotherusername:
    Anita was a developer. It wasn't her job to know what Flare is, or even how a wiki works, unless she was told "the documentation is in Flare/this wiki, here is how you access it". It was her job to read whatever form of documentation was provided and turn it into code.
    I have 15 years experience as a software engineer and I don't know what Flare is. But I do know several wiki-like documentation systems. It most definitely is a developer's job to write documentation - especially technical documentation that has implementation specifics, but usually you have to assist some in writing the specification too (because the business team never has their shit together and doesn't know how to logically think through any scenario).
  • (cs)

    My guess: Brad is a former athlete who won a very important game with blood all over his sock.

    (For those who can't guess, hint: BoSox; and his game company not only went bust but nearly dragged an entire state gov't down with it)

  • Resa (unregistered)

    Come on. How do you code in Unity and not know what the game is doing? Why not use Open Office? I call bull!

  • Hot (unregistered)

    So an old guy finds a female college student in a classroom/lab and takes her back to his garage? I'm pretty sure I've seen pr0n like that.

  • (cs) in reply to cellocgw
    cellocgw:
    My guess: Brad is a former athlete who won a very important game with blood all over his sock.

    (For those who can't guess, hint: BoSox; and his game company not only went bust but nearly dragged an entire state gov't down with it)

    A friend of mine was actually part of that. He's a veteran developer who'd been a lead at Blizzard for several years, and knows the game industry really well. I talked with him a while back about how that all went down, and to hear him talk, they were basically doing everything right, and the company ended up failing because the state investors screwed them over and they ended up not getting money that they'd been promised.

  • (cs)

    Y'know, in the real world of game development, you usually don't even have a title until you're starting to show it off to the press. Sometimes at that point it's still just a working title, even. Knowing the title of a game doesn't really help with the development of it. You should be designing to a design doc, not to a title.

    And yeah, if you have a problem with collaborative documentation management and decide to use Word, now you have two problems. Go with something DESIGNED for that, like a wiki. MediaWiki is pretty powerful and completely free.

  • (cs)

    Of course the great solution I like is "cork board" and "push pins", as mentioned before. If you are REAL cheap, you can use the office wall (drywall) instead of the cork board. You do end up with a bunch of holes in the wall, but they are small, and can be easily filled for the next customer. As for the sticky notes, it is probably a good idea to at minimum put a date one each one.

    Many low cost solutions.

    p.s. Good AC maintenance is always a good idea.

  • (cs) in reply to plaidfluff
    plaidfluff:
    And yeah, if you have a problem with collaborative documentation management and decide to use Word, now you have two problems. Go with something DESIGNED for that, like a wiki. MediaWiki is pretty powerful and completely free.
    For all of its cloud-related shortcomings, even using a google docs spreadsheet would be a big win over both stickies and word.
  • radarbob (unregistered) in reply to Truckers delight

    Happens. One time, at band camop... well, one time at a certain FUBAR coding shop; coding tools were "whatever we can find on the internet." They did not even standardize that.

  • A flatus was just released. (unregistered) in reply to 3.3 Million
    3.3 Million:
    I don't Brad was actually Tim Schaffer.
    I think you accidentally the whole thing.
  • Vlad Patryshev (unregistered)

    Kanban board, right? Works in may companies these days.

    Personally I have 7 stickers attached to my monitor; and I've been practicing it for years now, doing it even for my home remodeling projects.

    As to MS Word, it sucks from the very beginning, does not it? Wiki, otoh, is a good solution.

    But you know the advantage of yellow stickers? They stick until you are done, then you just throw them out. Pretty efficient, especially for personal use.

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