IBM Survivor, The High Road, & Find the Function!

  • snoofle 2008-06-05 09:08
    During the Wall Street crash of 2002, I found myself looking for a job. I interviewed at this place which turned out to be hundreds of tiny companies (each team was its own LLC registered in a different country, so that there was no liability to the parent holding company). I asked them how they managed to share information across legal entities, and they told me that lawyers are involved in all inter-team meetings.

    Then comes the final interview. About 25 candidates are all in a big room, with about 10 managers, and we are each asked to essentially justify why we are better than all the other candidates, out load and in front of everyone.

    Since I was the first one up, I was sure that at least one of the other 24 was Topper, and I was wasting my time, so I stood up and told them so, that I would not dance in their little circus, and simply walked out.
  • dgvid 2008-06-05 09:14
    As I sat alone in the conference room for the next few minutes, I wondered if there was a third option that I didn’t consider.


    Oh, yeah, there sure was. Remove your tie. Then start undoing buttons one-at-a-time. See how far she was willing to take that little game.
  • JackD 2008-06-05 09:16
    I think I'm missing the WTF in the IBM interview. Group interviews aren't uncommon, and weeding candidates down via testing isn't all that bad. I mean it's not the most pleasent interview process, but at least they didn't throw you in a pit with a bunch of rusty tools to duke it out with.
  • Russ 2008-06-05 09:16
    I once came to interview for an internship at a big financial company. Without asking me any relevant technical questions and only making some small talk, I was told that the job was mine if I wanted it.

    I didn't really want to code in C, so I passed it on to my friend who I think works there to this day. I took an internship at another place where I got to do web development - something I actually liked.
  • Mark G 2008-06-05 09:16
    Not bad
  • Aaron 2008-06-05 09:18
    That last example is what the recruiters love to refer to as "back room" developers.

    Back when I was naïve, I assumed that meant something to the effect of "They work well if you give them a screen mock-up and tell them exactly what each control is supposed to do." Eventually I learned what it really meant: "If you hand them 50 lines of pseudocode, there's a good chance they'll be able to translate them into 50 lines of C# without screwing it up too badly."

    I'm amazed that there are actually people out there who think that "programming" is the ability to write a statement that adds two numbers together, given specific instructions to write a statement that adds two numbers together.
  • Charles 2008-06-05 09:31
    Gee, I was hoping the blouse-popping story was going someplace interesting. It always does in the porn flicks that start that way.
  • AlanGriffiths 2008-06-05 09:37
    Aaron:
    I'm amazed that there are actually people out there who think that "programming" is the ability to write a statement that adds two numbers together, given specific instructions to write a statement that adds two numbers together.

    I've noticed that the use of language changes with the years. It used to be that "bad" meant, well "bad", but now it means "good". (I'm not sure what to say to mean "bad" maybe "evil"? Or does that mean "good"?)

    And "guys" used to be for males, but now it can be females.

    Sorry, I digress.

    I realised that "programming" doesn't mean what it did when I learnt English when I received the following in a job specification...

    "...this is a job for a software engineer, NOT a programmer"
  • Bob 2008-06-05 09:39
    There was nothing you could do. She wouldn't want to work with somebody who has seen her unbuttoned, and she would have noticed eventually.

    Letting her know was probably the better choice. At least she knows that you are respectable, and not a pervert, which might be better for you down the road. On the other hand, you might have missed out on seeing some boobies.
  • betlit 2008-06-05 09:40
    'clearing ones throat and pointing at her bosom' isn't the best way, i think...

    i guess, a friendly 'forgive me for noticing, but your blouse seem to have unbuttoned itself' while trying not to smile like a 14 year old teenie would have worked out nicely.
  • matt 2008-06-05 09:43
    Reid Maynard is a coward. You'd done the group bit, you were just about to begin the one-on-one interviews.

    If you were going to try and make a statement you'd do it during the group bit, surely?
  • valerion 2008-06-05 09:50
    betlit:
    'clearing ones throat and pointing at her bosom' isn't the best way, i think...

    i guess, a friendly 'forgive me for noticing, but your blouse seem to have unbuttoned itself' while trying not to smile like a 14 year old teenie would have worked out nicely.


    I think a "hey, you've got great tits" would've got the point across succinctly.
  • real_aardvark 2008-06-05 10:01
    JackD:
    I think I'm missing the WTF in the IBM interview. Group interviews aren't uncommon, and weeding candidates down via testing isn't all that bad. I mean it's not the most pleasant interview process, but at least they didn't throw you in a pit with a bunch of rusty tools to duke it out with.
    I suspect that this is precisely what they were going to do after they hire you...
  • joker 2008-06-05 10:10
    Whole industries actually work that way.

    Give some codemonkeys a mockup and make them translate it into code, preferably in several stages so nobody has to use too much brainpower.

    (hint: you've probably at least once in your life driven in something running such a program.)

    ;)
  • Bappi 2008-06-05 10:14
    snoofle:
    I was sure that at least one of the other 24 was Topper

    Who's Topper?
  • fatdog 2008-06-05 10:19
    Who's Topper?

    Lt. Topper Harley
  • Kane 2008-06-05 10:21
    Topper is the Dilbert character that can always top whatever you've done.

    http://solskinner.blogspot.com/2007/12/topper-from-dilbert.html
  • FredSaw 2008-06-05 10:30
    Charles:
    Gee, I was hoping the blouse-popping story was going someplace interesting. It always does in the porn flicks that start that way.
    I thought the buttons were rigged and it was going to be a test of his concentration, to see how well he kept focus in a distracting environment. The real story was a disappointment.
  • BadReferenceGuy 2008-06-05 10:36
    Charles:
    Gee, I was hoping the blouse-popping story was going someplace interesting. It always does in the porn flicks that start that way.


    IMHO, the real WTF is that it sounds like the applicant failed to secure an evening appointment with her.
  • Paula 2008-06-05 10:51
    I always like to show my brillant boobage on interviews.
  • A Person 2008-06-05 10:52
    Yikes. That blouse story reminds me of an interview I had. The woman was similar to the one described in the story, except she started out in a sweater and ended up in a (very nice!) form-fitting summer top. You should've seen me trying to look everywhere else but at her hands as she unbuttoned that sweater. I'm not sure I was entirely successful, but luckily she didn't make any indication if she noticed me noticing...
  • Georges 2008-06-05 10:56
    1. You never Leave an interview, even if it is a shitty interview. Maybe one day you come back to that same company... It's better to have no impression, than a bad one.

    2. No comment :)

    3. Awesome :)
  • Zecc 2008-06-05 11:05
    AlanGriffiths:
    I realised that "programming" doesn't mean what it did when I learnt English when I received the following in a job specification...

    "...this is a job for a software engineer, NOT a programmer"
    I'm not sure I understand where you're getting at.
    A software enginner is someone who can *design* software given requisites; a programmer is anyone who can implement a project given its specification (ie, *write code*).
    Of course, anyone worth its salt combines both.
  • pitchingchris 2008-06-05 11:20
    # 1 was a chicken. You don't make it all the way to the end to quit voluntarily. He probably weeded out those whose test indicated they didn't have the proper skills for the job because some of the answers were supposed to be common knowledge of the field and they wanted someone with at least an understanding. (Especially in the field of consulting, why should you pay someone who doesn't already know how to do the job you have for them. You don't consult someone who has to learn their way). Personally, I think if you made it to the one-on-one, you are about to go over the hill and things get easier after that. Guess we'll never know.
  • yet another Matt 2008-06-05 11:21
    snoofle:
    Since I was the first one up, I was sure that at least one of the other 24 was Topper, and I was wasting my time, so I stood up and told them so, that I would not dance in their little circus, and simply walked out.


    You should have hung around outside to see who Topper was, since presumably immediately after you left, he would have gotten up, insulted the interviews technique and their parentage, and then rappelled out of the window.
  • obediah 2008-06-05 11:25
    Zecc:

    A software enginner is someone who can *design* software given requisites; a programmer is anyone who can implement a project given its specification (ie, *write code*).
    Of course, anyone worth its salt combines both.


    Your answer doesn't scale. An engineer/programmer may be worth more salt than a programmer, but they cost more salt as well. If you've got enough engineering work for 10 people and programming work for 100 people, you'd waste a lot of money by hiring 110 engineer/programmers.
  • AT 2008-06-05 11:25
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.
  • wtf 2008-06-05 11:29
    The runaway candidate probably missed a great opportunity, not to mention the proper ending of the story.
    The shy one drew a totally wrong conclusion out of his story.
    As to the expert one, it all seems fake and made up. OK, maybe he couldn't figure out "the function" for the general case, but no way would he not be able to cope with the specific numbers case. And another thing - the real wtf is the company's first round of questions, and how easily impressed they apparently are.
  • Nobody 2008-06-05 11:32
    Zecc:
    AlanGriffiths:
    I realised that "programming" doesn't mean what it did when I learnt English when I received the following in a job specification...

    "...this is a job for a software engineer, NOT a programmer"
    I'm not sure I understand where you're getting at.
    A software enginner is someone who can *design* software given requisites; a programmer is anyone who can implement a project given its specification (ie, *write code*).
    Of course, anyone worth its salt combines both.


    "Software engineering" is a pseudonym for "project management". Any connection between "software" and "engineering" is tenuous at best. Flame away :-)
  • matt 2008-06-05 11:36
    Kane:
    Topper is the Dilbert character that can always top whatever you've done.

    http://solskinner.blogspot.com/2007/12/topper-from-dilbert.html


    Lyle!
  • KludgeQueen 2008-06-05 11:38
    Georges:
    1. You never Leave an interview, even if it is a shitty interview. Maybe one day you come back to that same company... It's better to have no impression, than a bad one.
    ...


    I disagree; he did the right thing. Long, long ago, I went for an interview that turned out to be for a telemarketing job, and I could hear the boiler-room workers being verbally abused by their supervisor while I waited for my interview. I walked out. It kind of reminds me of stories you hear of children being abused or wives being beaten. They don't like what's going on, they feel very uncomfortable, yet they don't leave, and it gets worse. If you feel uncomfortable, LEAVE. Don't let yourself be abused in any sense of the word. Don't voluntarily give up your freedom in such a situation. You don't HAVE to stay on.
  • T604 2008-06-05 11:39
    That beats the interview I had... this older manager had a rather large beetle crawling through her hair and the tech lead had a facial tick reminiscent of an old boxer. I was too scared to mention the beetle, the woman looked like a witch.

  • real_aardvark 2008-06-05 11:45
    pitchingchris:
    # 1 was a chicken. You don't make it all the way to the end to quit voluntarily. He probably weeded out those whose test indicated they didn't have the proper skills for the job because some of the answers were supposed to be common knowledge of the field and they wanted someone with at least an understanding. (Especially in the field of consulting, why should you pay someone who doesn't already know how to do the job you have for them. You don't consult someone who has to learn their way). Personally, I think if you made it to the one-on-one, you are about to go over the hill and things get easier after that. Guess we'll never know.
    That's very sweet, in a naive and idyllic sort of way.

    Have you ever had dealings with a Consultant?
  • NotAPerv 2008-06-05 11:45
    About a year ago when I was looking to switch jobs I had a recruiter call me and pitch me a few jobs, yadda yadda yadda. He wanted to meet me so that he could tell the client he had met me in person, etc. Typical recruiter stuff. Well, it was a Friday and I was still employed so I said I'd meet him after work. I got done with work about 5:30 PM, so then I set out to see him - his office was about 45 minutes away.

    Apparently I was messing with his Friday night plans because he called me half way through the trip asking if I wanted to reschedule - I said no, I was already on my way. When I finally got there he had decided to leave, so instead I got to interview with someone else - a 22-year-old blonde former cheerleader.

    So what could have been some lame meeting with some recruiter dickhead turns out to be an awesome twenty minutes as she was very cute and very nice. She knew absolutely nothing about technology or the positions I was going for and I had to explain everything I did and what terms meant and so forth but she was easy on the eyes so it was no bother. I wasn't surprised when she said she had only been working there for about a month and a half. My guess was this was her first job out of college.

    As a bonus though she obviously had no idea how to dress professionally - although she was skinny by any definition, her shirt didn't quite fit and so the vertical opening down the front was gaping open between two of the buttons, so the whole time I could see the top of her belly and the bottom of her bra. My guess would be that she was oblivious to this and had been basically flashing people all day when she sat down.

    So overall, well worth the trip.
  • Zecc 2008-06-05 11:47
    obediah:
    Your answer doesn't scale. An engineer/programmer may be worth more salt than a programmer, but they cost more salt as well. If you've got enough engineering work for 10 people and programming work for 100 people, you'd waste a lot of money by hiring 110 engineer/programmers.
    My point was that AlanGriffiths' meaning of "programming" may not have been off, but rather his meaning of "software engineer". A "software engineer" may not know squat about programming per se, but a lot about creating computer systems. Much like an architect doesn't have much practice about laying down bricks.
  • SomeCoder 2008-06-05 11:47
    yet another Matt:


    You should have hung around outside to see who Topper was, since presumably immediately after you left, he would have gotten up, insulted the interviews technique and their parentage, and then rappelled out of the window.



    Ok, that made me laugh :)
  • obediah 2008-06-05 11:50
    NotAPerv:
    About a year ago when I was looking to switch jobs I had a recruiter call me and pitch me a few jobs, yadda yadda yadda. He wanted to meet me so that he could tell the client he had met me in person, etc. Typical recruiter stuff. Well, it was a Friday and I was still employed so I said I'd meet him after work. I got done with work about 5:30 PM, so then I set out to see him - his office was about 45 minutes away.

    Apparently I was messing with his Friday night plans because he called me half way through the trip asking if I wanted to reschedule - I said no, I was already on my way. When I finally got there he had decided to leave, so instead I got to interview with someone else - a 22-year-old blonde former cheerleader.

    So what could have been some lame meeting with some recruiter dickhead turns out to be an awesome twenty minutes as she was very cute and very nice. She knew absolutely nothing about technology or the positions I was going for and I had to explain everything I did and what terms meant and so forth but she was easy on the eyes so it was no bother. I wasn't surprised when she said she had only been working there for about a month and a half. My guess was this was her first job out of college.

    As a bonus though she obviously had no idea how to dress professionally - although she was skinny by any definition, her shirt didn't quite fit and so the vertical opening down the front was gaping open between two of the buttons, so the whole time I could see the top of her belly and the bottom of her bra. My guess would be that she was oblivious to this and had been basically flashing people all day when she sat down.

    So overall, well worth the trip.


    Hmm. Now I know what all the letters to Penthouse forums would be like if the guys didn't embellish.
  • dpm 2008-06-05 11:57
    wtf:
    As to the expert one, it all seems fake and made up. OK, maybe he couldn't figure out "the function" for the general case, but no way would he not be able to cope with the specific numbers case.

    I congratulate you on avoiding the real world. I've had to work with^Wagainst people equally incapable/incompetent/ignorant --- for example, today's luser refers to a shell script as a "shell" and will not accept my explanation. Which explains his report on my progress as to "implementing a new shell".
  • AlanGriffiths 2008-06-05 12:01
    Nobody:
    Zecc:
    AlanGriffiths:
    I realised that "programming" doesn't mean what it did when I learnt English when I received the following in a job specification...

    "...this is a job for a software engineer, NOT a programmer"
    I'm not sure I understand where you're getting at.
    A software enginner is someone who can *design* software given requisites; a programmer is anyone who can implement a project given its specification (ie, *write code*).
    Of course, anyone worth its salt combines both.


    "Software engineering" is a pseudonym for "project management". Any connection between "software" and "engineering" is tenuous at best. Flame away :-)

    Humpty Dumpty: When I use a word, it means just what I choose it to mean - neither more nor less.

    Alice: The question is, whether you can make words mean so many different things.

    (Alan goes to rummage around for the original jobspec...it was neither of these things.)
  • vt_mruhlin 2008-06-05 12:01
    When college graduation was looming near, Career Services set me up with an on-campus interview with the IT department at a well known home improvement store chain.

    There was another guy in the waiting room who said he was interviewing with the same company. "great, there's my competition", I thought as I stared intimidatingly at him from across the room.

    Two candidates left, soon followed by two interviewers who called us back. OK, it was standard practice to have each candidate do an interview with each interviewer. I wondered which one I would have first, and what their role was.

    They led us both back to the same room and proceeded to interview us both at the same time. It didn't really help the intimidation factor that the other guy was a grad student. They'd ask me a question, then get his opinion on the matter (and why I was wrong).

    In the end though, I got called back to headquarters for further interviews (and was eventually offered the job). He was not.
  • Silmaril 2008-06-05 12:06
    Well, there is a risk here too. She could have a bad idea of why you really needed to go to the bathroom.

    But maybe that's only me and my wretched mind ;)
  • Silmaril 2008-06-05 12:07
    AT:
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.


    the previous message was in answer of this one
  • kimbo305 2008-06-05 12:11
    Re: High Road

    I think it would have been best to alertly and bluntly point out the button pop right away, blaming it on the shirt.

    If he ignored it, how would it look if they got out of the interview and there was 3, 4 buttons undone?

    captcha: eros. Interesting
  • alegr 2008-06-05 12:14
    AT:
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.


    If you do it in the bathroom, you'll go blind. And your palms will grow hair.
  • jeremypnet 2008-06-05 12:19
    NotAPerv:
    so the whole time I could see the top of her belly and the bottom of her bra. My guess would be that she was oblivious to this and had been basically flashing people all day when she sat down.

    So overall, well worth the trip.

    OMG she showed her stomach!!!!!!! I'd drive for days for that.

    Are you a Slashdot regular by any chance? Because you seriously need to get a girlfriend.
  • jeremypnet 2008-06-05 12:29
    Georges:
    1. You never Leave an interview, even if it is a shitty interview. Maybe one day you come back to that same company... It's better to have no impression, than a bad one.

    Speaking as an ex-IBM employee, I'd say it's probably better to burn your boats with them than not.

    I'm being a bit hypocritical. When I left, as per company policy, they gave me an exit interview. It was obviously the first one that the young lady from HR had ever done and she didn't know me at all. She had a form to fill in and she started reading the questions out. For the most part, they were things like: "why is the person leaving?", "where is the person going?", "what could IBM do better?" etc.

    Finally she read out "would IBM ever employ the person again?" She got a bit confused there, so I helped her out by saying "put 'yes' down for that".
  • Phil 2008-06-05 12:33
    I reckon you should have grabbed a penny from your pocket and aimed at the cleavage. If you land it in there, the job is yours.
  • shakin 2008-06-05 12:40
    I once interviewed a very attractive young woman who showed up at the interview with her fly undone and wearing bright pink underwear. Actually, filling that position was a lot of fun because a guy we interviewed for it was so overweight that he broke the chair when he sat on it.
  • Harrow 2008-06-05 13:08
    "...a 120x300 image on a 400*500 stage"

    It's extremely cruel to sandbag a candidate like that. Nobody can code a function to such impossible requirements.

    I can center a 120*300 image on a 400*500 stage, or a 120x300 image on a 400x500 stage, but there's no reason for a programmer to have memorized the conversion factors between "x" and "*".

    -Harrow.
  • FredSaw 2008-06-05 13:19
    shakin:
    I once interviewed a very attractive young woman who showed up at the interview with her fly undone and wearing bright pink underwear.
    What, no Sharon Stone impression? Aw...
  • A Gould 2008-06-05 13:33
    KludgeQueen:
    Georges:
    1. You never Leave an interview, even if it is a shitty interview. Maybe one day you come back to that same company... It's better to have no impression, than a bad one.
    ...


    I disagree; he did the right thing. Long, long ago, I went for an interview that turned out to be for a telemarketing job, and I could hear the boiler-room workers being verbally abused by their supervisor while I waited for my interview. I walked out. It kind of reminds me of stories you hear of children being abused or wives being beaten. They don't like what's going on, they feel very uncomfortable, yet they don't leave, and it gets worse. If you feel uncomfortable, LEAVE. Don't let yourself be abused in any sense of the word. Don't voluntarily give up your freedom in such a situation. You don't HAVE to stay on.


    Agreed - Hiring is a two-part process: they need to want you, and you need to want *them*. If their behavior in the interview convinces you that you don't want to work there, excusing yourself saves your time and theirs. (Yes, most recruiters/interviewers tend to be very confused at this point, but that's their problem, not yours.) I've walked out on a couple interviews (generally variations on the group interview / everyone's hired shtick.)

    And sadly, it's getting worse: a friend just started a temp job (basic admin ass't work). Turns out they've hired 12 temps, and are narrowing them down reality-show style (here's a project - compete against each other to see who can do it best/fastest). Keep in mind that the job he applied/was hired for was explicitly *temporary* - there was no indication of a possibility of full-time, so the whole thing is pretty amusing at his end (they're tracking and questioning everything in terms of "are you really dedicated to the company"?) Fortunately, he's taking it in good humor (he didn't want the job as full-time anyway, so he doesn't feel the pressure).

    I wonder when "Admin Assistant Survivor" will air? (Outfile, out-staple, out-collate?)
  • DFK 2008-06-05 13:38
    After the first button went I would've said "Are you coming on to me or is your shirt coming undone?.

    I'm an unscrupulous bastard; accusing her outright is the way to go since it puts keeps the ball in your court.
  • WhiskeyJack 2008-06-05 13:44
    A Gould:

    And sadly, it's getting worse: a friend just started a temp job (basic admin ass't work). Turns out they've hired 12 temps, and are narrowing them down reality-show style (here's a project - compete against each other to see who can do it best/fastest). Keep in mind that the job he applied/was hired for was explicitly *temporary* - there was no indication of a possibility of full-time, so the whole thing is pretty amusing at his end (they're tracking and questioning everything in terms of "are you really dedicated to the company"?) Fortunately, he's taking it in good humor (he didn't want the job as full-time anyway, so he doesn't feel the pressure).


    Is management a fan of season 4 of "House"? :)
  • K von M 2008-06-05 13:44
    i used to be an assistant recruiter for a company handling tech positions and other high-end contractors, and after the candidates got hired i had to do their contractor orientation session... that blouse-popper story is exactly why i never wear button-down shirts in the office. even now, it's always pull-overs or cardigans with tank tops underneath.

    then again, it didn't stop my then boyfriend (now husband) from ogling my chest and waggling his eyebrows at me during his orientation session. :)
  • K von M 2008-06-05 13:45
    A Gould:

    And sadly, it's getting worse: a friend just started a temp job (basic admin ass't work). Turns out they've hired 12 temps, and are narrowing them down reality-show style (here's a project - compete against each other to see who can do it best/fastest). Keep in mind that the job he applied/was hired for was explicitly *temporary* - there was no indication of a possibility of full-time, so the whole thing is pretty amusing at his end (they're tracking and questioning everything in terms of "are you really dedicated to the company"?) Fortunately, he's taking it in good humor (he didn't want the job as full-time anyway, so he doesn't feel the pressure).

    I wonder when "Admin Assistant Survivor" will air? (Outfile, out-staple, out-collate?)

    dude! sign me up!!
  • FredSaw 2008-06-05 13:56
    K von M:
    ...that blouse-popper story is exactly why i never wear button-down shirts in the office. even now, it's always pull-overs or cardigans with tank tops underneath.
    I think we're going to need pictures.
  • SomeCoder 2008-06-05 14:09
    WhiskeyJack:
    A Gould:

    And sadly, it's getting worse: a friend just started a temp job (basic admin ass't work). Turns out they've hired 12 temps, and are narrowing them down reality-show style (here's a project - compete against each other to see who can do it best/fastest). Keep in mind that the job he applied/was hired for was explicitly *temporary* - there was no indication of a possibility of full-time, so the whole thing is pretty amusing at his end (they're tracking and questioning everything in terms of "are you really dedicated to the company"?) Fortunately, he's taking it in good humor (he didn't want the job as full-time anyway, so he doesn't feel the pressure).


    Is management a fan of season 4 of "House"? :)


    It always make me wonder if life imitates art or if art imitates life.

    I don't really watch The Office but I did happen to catch the episode with the sensitivity training where everyone had to put name cards on their foreheads of different races, etc.

    Shortly thereafter, my company required sensitivity training for all employees. Yep, you guessed it: name cards on the foreheads.

    They swore that they thought of it before The Office did it. Either they are doing it and The Office is making fun of them or they saw The Office and decided it was a good idea. Neither option is a particularly good reflection on their intelligence and the training was just as stupid and useless as it was in the show.
  • Anonymous 2008-06-05 14:18
    FredSaw:
    shakin:
    I once interviewed a very attractive young woman who showed up at the interview with her fly undone and wearing bright pink underwear.
    What, no Sharon Stone impression? Aw...


    I used to work with a female programmer that was not only hot, but in the summer she wore a tight top that showed her bellybutton and very low cut pants. She also wore pink underware that was flashed every time she sat down or bent over.

    Description:
    * Early twenties
    * Blonde
    * Very attractive
    * Higly fit (washboard stomach)
    * Perfect breasts

    I'm not making this up. I swear.
  • Robert S. Robbins 2008-06-05 14:41
    Why do do people interview for jobs at IBM, Microsoft, or Google? You should come to Pennsylvania and interview for jobs with the Amish. They never ask tough technical questions.
  • real_aardvark 2008-06-05 14:48
    shakin:
    I once interviewed a very attractive young woman who showed up at the interview with her fly undone and wearing bright pink underwear. Actually, filling that position was a lot of fun because a guy we interviewed for it was so overweight that he broke the chair when he sat on it.
    I got as far as "filling that position was a lot of fun" and then unaccountably lost interest with the rest of your story. Something to do with furniture S&M, wasn't it?
  • anon 2008-06-05 14:52
    Anonymous:
    FredSaw:
    shakin:
    I once interviewed a very attractive young woman who showed up at the interview with her fly undone and wearing bright pink underwear.
    What, no Sharon Stone impression? Aw...


    I used to work with a female programmer that was not only hot, but in the summer she wore a tight top that showed her bellybutton and very low cut pants. She also wore pink underware that was flashed every time she sat down or bent over.

    Description:
    * Early twenties
    * Blonde
    * Very attractive
    * Higly fit (washboard stomach)
    * Perfect breasts

    I'm not making this up. I swear.


    Big deal... We had a hot accountant in my old old job (desktop support) who had her own porn site... Believe me, we fought over who got to help her with any trouble-tickets. One of the guys on my team slept with her, but I'm pretty sure he had to pay for it.

    Unfortunately, something like that never stays secret, so she got fired a month or so after we discovered her web-page (Supposedly, she actually was a good accountant. They didn't really want to fire her; just told her she couldn't be an accountant there AND have a porn-site. She choose to keep the porn-site up and they let her go)

    Captcha: eros (of course)
  • 008 2008-06-05 15:12
    anon:
    Anonymous:
    FredSaw:
    shakin:
    I once interviewed a very attractive young woman who showed up at the interview with her fly undone and wearing bright pink underwear.
    What, no Sharon Stone impression? Aw...


    I used to work with a female programmer that was not only hot, but in the summer she wore a tight top that showed her bellybutton and very low cut pants. She also wore pink underware that was flashed every time she sat down or bent over.

    Description:
    * Early twenties
    * Blonde
    * Very attractive
    * Higly fit (washboard stomach)
    * Perfect breasts

    I'm not making this up. I swear.


    Big deal... We had a hot accountant in my old old job (desktop support) who had her own porn site... Believe me, we fought over who got to help her with any trouble-tickets. One of the guys on my team slept with her, but I'm pretty sure he had to pay for it.

    Unfortunately, something like that never stays secret, so she got fired a month or so after we discovered her web-page (Supposedly, she actually was a good accountant. They didn't really want to fire her; just told her she couldn't be an accountant there AND have a porn-site. She choose to keep the porn-site up and they let her go)

    Captcha: eros (of course)


    ...And then to punish everyone, they hired an ugly, overweight man who runs a porn site?
  • SomeCoder 2008-06-05 15:17
    anon:


    Big deal... We had a hot accountant in my old old job (desktop support) who had her own porn site... Believe me, we fought over who got to help her with any trouble-tickets. One of the guys on my team slept with her, but I'm pretty sure he had to pay for it.

    Unfortunately, something like that never stays secret, so she got fired a month or so after we discovered her web-page (Supposedly, she actually was a good accountant. They didn't really want to fire her; just told her she couldn't be an accountant there AND have a porn-site. She choose to keep the porn-site up and they let her go)

    Captcha: eros (of course)


    This post is unbelievable without links

    :D
  • K von M 2008-06-05 15:20
    FredSaw:
    K von M:
    ...that blouse-popper story is exactly why i never wear button-down shirts in the office. even now, it's always pull-overs or cardigans with tank tops underneath.
    I think we're going to need pictures.

    sorry, i'm an executive assistant, not an accountant, so i can't create my own porn site ;).
  • Rush 2008-06-05 15:24
    K von M:
    FredSaw:
    K von M:
    ...that blouse-popper story is exactly why i never wear button-down shirts in the office. even now, it's always pull-overs or cardigans with tank tops underneath.
    I think we're going to need pictures.

    sorry, i'm an executive assistant, not an accountant, so i can't create my own porn site ;).


    Hey, Get off my kool-aid... I'm the only one allowed to see photos or the real thing! :)
  • KattMan 2008-06-05 15:27
    K von M:
    FredSaw:
    K von M:
    ...that blouse-popper story is exactly why i never wear button-down shirts in the office. even now, it's always pull-overs or cardigans with tank tops underneath.
    I think we're going to need pictures.

    sorry, i'm an executive assistant, not an accountant, so i can't create my own porn site ;).


    While I could create the site, I am a much better photographer. So I'll take the photos and let someone else build the site for you.

    Anyone whos name reminds me of Katt Von D has got to be good in my book, or at least in my book.
  • Rush 2008-06-05 15:33
    KattMan:
    K von M:
    FredSaw:
    K von M:
    ...that blouse-popper story is exactly why i never wear button-down shirts in the office. even now, it's always pull-overs or cardigans with tank tops underneath.
    I think we're going to need pictures.

    sorry, i'm an executive assistant, not an accountant, so i can't create my own porn site ;).


    While I could create the site, I am a much better photographer. So I'll take the photos and let someone else build the site for you.

    Anyone whos name reminds me of Katt Von D has got to be good in my book, or at least in my book.


    Oy! go get yer own, and get off mine! hehehe :)
  • WeatherGod 2008-06-05 15:45
    shakin:
    I once interviewed a very attractive young woman who showed up at the interview with her fly undone and wearing bright pink underwear.

    Bloom - "Yes, we may have a position for you..."
    Bialy - "Actually, we have several..."

    The Producers FTW!
  • Kal 2008-06-05 16:13
    anon:
    Anonymous:
    FredSaw:
    shakin:
    I once interviewed a very attractive young woman who showed up at the interview with her fly undone and wearing bright pink underwear.
    What, no Sharon Stone impression? Aw...


    I used to work with a female programmer that was not only hot, but in the summer she wore a tight top that showed her bellybutton and very low cut pants. She also wore pink underware that was flashed every time she sat down or bent over.

    Description:
    * Early twenties
    * Blonde
    * Very attractive
    * Higly fit (washboard stomach)
    * Perfect breasts

    I'm not making this up. I swear.


    Big deal... We had a hot accountant in my old old job (desktop support) who had her own porn site... Believe me, we fought over who got to help her with any trouble-tickets. One of the guys on my team slept with her, but I'm pretty sure he had to pay for it.

    Unfortunately, something like that never stays secret, so she got fired a month or so after we discovered her web-page (Supposedly, she actually was a good accountant. They didn't really want to fire her; just told her she couldn't be an accountant there AND have a porn-site. She choose to keep the porn-site up and they let her go)

    Captcha: eros (of course)


    That's nothing. At my previous job, Jessica Alba was our receptionist and she worked naked.
  • Simetrical 2008-06-05 16:17
    wtf:
    As to the expert one, it all seems fake and made up. OK, maybe he couldn't figure out "the function" for the general case, but no way would he not be able to cope with the specific numbers case.

    Ever tried being a math tutor for low-level math? It's quite enlightening. Yes, there are many, many people who can't figure out things like this.
  • ebenblues 2008-06-05 16:30
    Speaking of Toppers...
  • ebenblues 2008-06-05 16:36
    anon:
    Anonymous:
    FredSaw:
    shakin:
    I once interviewed a very attractive young woman who showed up at the interview with her fly undone and wearing bright pink underwear.
    What, no Sharon Stone impression? Aw...


    I used to work with a female programmer that was not only hot, but in the summer she wore a tight top that showed her bellybutton and very low cut pants. She also wore pink underware that was flashed every time she sat down or bent over.

    Description:
    * Early twenties
    * Blonde
    * Very attractive
    * Higly fit (washboard stomach)
    * Perfect breasts

    I'm not making this up. I swear.


    Big deal... We had a hot accountant in my old old job (desktop support) who had her own porn site... Believe me, we fought over who got to help her with any trouble-tickets. One of the guys on my team slept with her, but I'm pretty sure he had to pay for it.

    Unfortunately, something like that never stays secret, so she got fired a month or so after we discovered her web-page (Supposedly, she actually was a good accountant. They didn't really want to fire her; just told her she couldn't be an accountant there AND have a porn-site. She choose to keep the porn-site up and they let her go)

    Captcha: eros (of course)

    Speaking of Toppers...

    (sorry for not quoting before)
  • Justice 2008-06-05 16:46
    kimbo305:
    I think it would have been best to alertly and bluntly point out the button pop right away, blaming it on the shirt.

    If he ignored it, how would it look if they got out of the interview and there was 3, 4 buttons undone?


    It would look like the interview went quite well indeed :-)

    That actually could have happened at my last job, if I hadn't interviewed in March. Somebody at a director level clearly had a preference for a certain type of lady.

    Anyway, while it isn't covered by standard etiquette, the only "professional" way to raise an alert is to stumble through an awkward sentence and sound apologetic for noticing (out of the corner of your eye, of course). Or adjust your tie a lot, see if you can provoke a mimic response, and let the situation resolve itself.

    OR: you can proceed normally with the interview but allow your roguish charm to shine through. It might help you land the job, and if not, she already has your phone number...
  • Zylon 2008-06-05 16:48
    ebenblues:
    Speaking of Toppers...

    (sorry for not quoting before)

    Yeah, the screen-full of quoted text really makes the difference.
  • K von M 2008-06-05 17:06
    Justice:
    Anyway, while it isn't covered by standard etiquette, the only "professional" way to raise an alert is to stumble through an awkward sentence and sound apologetic for noticing (out of the corner of your eye, of course). Or adjust your tie a lot, see if you can provoke a mimic response, and let the situation resolve itself.

    you could also use it as a way of demonstrating that one of your strengths is attention to detail while you calmly reach over and re-button her shirt for her. i don't think it's possible to file a sexual harrassment claim against someone who's only a potential employee :D.
  • transverbero 2008-06-05 17:17
    "Beg pardon, miss, but your wardrobe appears to be malfunctioning."
  • Edward Royce 2008-06-05 17:41
    AT:
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.


    Or you could reprise that scene from Dr. Zhivago where the main character has a stroke.

    Cough ... cough ... choke ... gaaaaahhhh ... (falls down)
  • Carnildo 2008-06-05 17:43
    T604:
    I was too scared to mention the beetle, the woman looked like a witch.


    It was probably her familiar.
  • Edward Royce 2008-06-05 17:56
    SomeCoder:
    yet another Matt:


    You should have hung around outside to see who Topper was, since presumably immediately after you left, he would have gotten up, insulted the interviews technique and their parentage, and then rappelled out of the window.



    Ok, that made me laugh :)


    Hah! Only wanna-be Topper rappel!

    Real Toppers use a Squirrel Suit!

    Squirrel Suit

    And if the meeting is only on the first floor, well that's why they're called Toppers.

  • Edward Royce 2008-06-05 18:12
    Silmaril:
    Well, there is a risk here too. She could have a bad idea of why you really needed to go to the bathroom.

    But maybe that's only me and my wretched mind ;)


    You could pretend to have Tourette's Syndrome.
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-06-05 19:22
    The High Road

    Aaaahhhh, if only this ever happened to me.

    Give us more of these erotic stories.
  • I see boobies 2008-06-05 19:26
    ebenblues:
    anon:
    Anonymous:
    FredSaw:
    shakin:
    I once interviewed a very attractive young woman who showed up at the interview with her fly undone and wearing bright pink underwear.
    What, no Sharon Stone impression? Aw...


    I used to work with a female programmer that was not only hot, but in the summer she wore a tight top that showed her bellybutton and very low cut pants. She also wore pink underware that was flashed every time she sat down or bent over.

    Description:
    * Early twenties
    * Blonde
    * Very attractive
    * Higly fit (washboard stomach)
    * Perfect breasts

    I'm not making this up. I swear.


    Big deal... We had a hot accountant in my old old job (desktop support) who had her own porn site... Believe me, we fought over who got to help her with any trouble-tickets. One of the guys on my team slept with her, but I'm pretty sure he had to pay for it.

    Unfortunately, something like that never stays secret, so she got fired a month or so after we discovered her web-page (Supposedly, she actually was a good accountant. They didn't really want to fire her; just told her she couldn't be an accountant there AND have a porn-site. She choose to keep the porn-site up and they let her go)

    Captcha: eros (of course)

    Speaking of Toppers...

    (sorry for not quoting before)


    In the early 90s I helped to install and admin the network at the Playboy Mansion, it was the best job ever.
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-06-05 19:28
    Russ:
    I once came to interview for an internship at a big financial company. Without asking me any relevant technical questions and only making some small talk, I was told that the job was mine if I wanted it.

    I didn't really want to code in C, so I passed it on to my friend who I think works there to this day. I took an internship at another place where I got to do web development - something I actually liked.


    Some things are easier than others...
  • arty 2008-06-05 19:30
    Robert S. Robbins:
    Pennsylvania and interview for jobs with the Amish.


    The amish are *hiring*? How come they never post on monster?
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-06-05 19:33
    Aaron:
    That last example is what the recruiters love to refer to as "back room" developers.

    Back when I was naïve, I assumed that meant something to the effect of "They work well if you give them a screen mock-up and tell them exactly what each control is supposed to do." Eventually I learned what it really meant: "If you hand them 50 lines of pseudocode, there's a good chance they'll be able to translate them into 50 lines of C# without screwing it up too badly."

    I'm amazed that there are actually people out there who think that "programming" is the ability to write a statement that adds two numbers together, given specific instructions to write a statement that adds two numbers together.


    OOP, the addXXX-object

    Hey come on! We're in 2008! You cannot write anymore:

    ECHO Hello World

    What do you think?
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-06-05 19:45
    Zecc:
    AlanGriffiths:
    I realised that "programming" doesn't mean what it did when I learnt English when I received the following in a job specification...

    "...this is a job for a software engineer, NOT a programmer"
    I'm not sure I understand where you're getting at.
    A software enginner is someone who can *design* software given requisites; a programmer is anyone who can implement a project given its specification (ie, *write code*).
    Of course, anyone worth its salt combines both.



    ...and The Architect tells the Software Engineer how he explained it all to management.
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-06-05 19:56
    pitchingchris:
    Especially in the field of consulting, why should you pay someone who doesn't already know how to do the job you have for them. You don't consult someone who has to learn their way). Personally, I think if you made it to the one-on-one, you are about to go over the hill and things get easier after that. Guess we'll never know.


    After some 5.000 days of professional IT, I must say: I still like Google (google.com for those who don't know, and, my God, there are many of them). You may eventually be required to learn on-the-job. I recently had a Delphi job. No experience. But there was no Delphi programmer available. Anyway, with my VB experience (yes, I know, mea maxima culpa) I was productive after 1 week.
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-06-05 20:20
    Georges:
    1. You never Leave an interview, even if it is a shitty interview. Maybe one day you come back to that same company... It's better to have no impression, than a bad one.


    Dunno. Only in 1 single case I applied at a company twice (and that was some 30 years back). Since then, I simply move on and go to the next one,
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-06-05 20:48
    Robert S. Robbins:
    Why do do people interview for jobs at IBM, Microsoft, or Google? You should come to Pennsylvania and interview for jobs with the Amish. They never ask tough technical questions.


    This is somehow true. Since nearly 12 months I am working for financial institutions and before for governmental institutions. It's so boring. So fucking booooooooring. They don't ask you a lot. Just that you stay.
  • chrome 2008-06-05 21:03
    Phil:
    I reckon you should have grabbed a penny from your pocket and aimed at the cleavage. If you land it in there, the job is yours.


    Lawsuit, job, they're both the same really.
  • Abraham 2008-06-06 03:22
    Ahh, the ubiquitous positioning ... I found out just recently my junior coworker uses the "function":

    posX = (img.getWidth()*7/10)-20;

  • Abraham 2008-06-06 03:27
    Abraham:
    Ahh, the ubiquitous positioning ... I found out just recently my junior coworker uses the "function":

    posX = (img.getWidth()*7/10)-20;



    Centering image, centerning, not positioning, ahh dammnit.
  • GordonS 2008-06-06 03:28
    AT:
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.


    But... then she might think you've gone for a ham shank!
  • valerion 2008-06-06 04:36
    What you should've done is excuse yourself from the room, go and find someone senior, explain that the interviewer is coming onto you by undressing, that you don't think it's appropriate, that you will not sleep with her to get the job, and that you are thinking of filing a lawsuit.

    Cue the interviewer getting fired and you getting the job to keep you sweet.
  • Overthinking 2008-06-06 05:10
    AT:
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.

    ...and here's how that backfires...

    You make an excuse to go the toilet, as she watches the guy in his early twenties hurriedly leaving the room bound for the privacy of a cubicle she notices her gaping blouse, puts two and two together and makes four...knuckle shuffle.

    (yes, I know traditionally it's a FIVE knuckle shuffle but then the pun wouldn't work, would it)
  • Topper 2008-06-06 05:54
    anon:
    Big deal... We had a hot accountant in my old old job (desktop support) who had her own porn site... Believe me, we fought over who got to help her with any trouble-tickets. One of the guys on my team slept with her, but I'm pretty sure he had to pay for it.


    That's nothing, we used to have Jenna Jameson as our office manager, Tera Patrick did accounts, and Veronica Zemanova handled interviews. Fridays was clothing-optional.
  • dr. Hannibal Lecter 2008-06-06 06:21
    snoofle:

    Since I was the first one up, I was sure that at least one of the other 24 was Topper, and I was wasting my time, so I stood up and told them so, that I would not dance in their little circus, and simply walked out.


    Oh yeah? Well I did the same thing except I walked out twice!
  • Mel 2008-06-06 06:56
    AT:
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.

    How about getting her to leave? You could ask for a glass of water or something, and hopefully she'd either notice on her own, or someone else could be the messenger.
  • TInkerghost 2008-06-06 08:38
    anon:


    Big deal... We had a hot accountant in my old old job (desktop support) who had her own porn site... Believe me, we fought over who got to help her with any trouble-tickets. One of the guys on my team slept with her, but I'm pretty sure he had to pay for it.

    Unfortunately, something like that never stays secret, so she got fired a month or so after we discovered her web-page (Supposedly, she actually was a good accountant. They didn't really want to fire her; just told her she couldn't be an accountant there AND have a porn-site. She choose to keep the porn-site up and they let her go)

    Captcha: eros (of course)

    We had a trainer at one company I worked for who was a Pro-Dom after hours, same company had a stripper ... seems they both worked there for the health insurance as they made much more money at the 2nd job.
    So according to HR - Pro-Dom bad, stripper Good.
  • Mike 2008-06-06 09:02
    Phil:
    I reckon you should have grabbed a penny from your pocket and aimed at the cleavage. If you land it in there, the job is yours.


    Lesson learned: Always bring a penny to an interview.
  • Mike 2008-06-06 09:08
    [quote user="AlanGriffiths"]It used to be that "bad" meant, well "bad", but now it means "good". (I'm not sure what to say to mean "bad" maybe "evil"? Or does that mean "good"?)

    I hereby nominate "Potential Microsoft/Yahoo Merger" as the new replacement for the traditional meaning of "bad" in our common vernacular.
  • andrewbadera 2008-06-06 09:47
    I worked for IBM on a short contract in 1999 or 2000, at the age of 20? maybe 21. They hired me based on a phone interview only, for an ASP/SQL job working on a large circuit order and disconnect contract enforcement system that they used to enforce contract dates and terms with AT&T, their circuit provider. The integration point? Lotus f-ing Notes, and an ever-evolving data model managed by a guy who had been doing RDB for 25+ years and was more than slightly OCD. Lesson learned: never work for a company based on a phone interview alone, even on a contract.

    The reason it was a short contract? Total non-fit. Beyond the Lotus Notes pain, they were way too tight about dress code -- ties every day -- and the fulltimers greatly resented the rates I, the highest rate contractor, was getting paid. Of course they ignored the crazy vacation days and health benefits they enjoyed. Lesson learned: don't reveal your rate, even to fellow contractors you think you can trust. It will get out.

    The one upside of that whole experience? Working with a massive DB2 database on an RS/whatever platform. Sick, sick, sick RDBMS.
  • real_aardvark 2008-06-06 09:51
    TInkerghost:
    anon:


    Big deal... We had a hot accountant in my old old job (desktop support) who had her own porn site... Believe me, we fought over who got to help her with any trouble-tickets. One of the guys on my team slept with her, but I'm pretty sure he had to pay for it.

    Unfortunately, something like that never stays secret, so she got fired a month or so after we discovered her web-page (Supposedly, she actually was a good accountant. They didn't really want to fire her; just told her she couldn't be an accountant there AND have a porn-site. She choose to keep the porn-site up and they let her go)

    Captcha: eros (of course)

    We had a trainer at one company I worked for who was a Pro-Dom after hours, same company had a stripper ... seems they both worked there for the health insurance as they made much more money at the 2nd job.
    So according to HR - Pro-Dom bad, stripper Good.
    Surely the trainer would have been better employed as a Pro-Dom during office hours?
  • spinn 2008-06-06 10:14
    AT:
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.


    To be honest, I don't think "I need some time alone in the bathroom RIGHT NOW" would really have been the right response, either.
  • charonme 2008-06-06 10:26
    FredSaw:
    K von M:
    ...that blouse-popper story is exactly why i never wear button-down shirts in the office. even now, it's always pull-overs or cardigans with tank tops underneath.
    I think we're going to need pictures.

  • BT 2008-06-06 11:22
    Or, in the worst case, it leaves the impression that you noticed the "clothing failure" and went for a quick wank in the restroom...
  • BT 2008-06-06 11:23
    AT:
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.

    Or, in the worst case, it leaves the impression that you noticed the "clothing failure" and went for a quick wank in the restroom...
  • James 2008-06-06 12:23
    Anonymous:
    FredSaw:
    shakin:
    I once interviewed a very attractive young woman who showed up at the interview with her fly undone and wearing bright pink underwear.
    What, no Sharon Stone impression? Aw...


    I used to work with a female programmer that was not only hot, but in the summer she wore a tight top that showed her bellybutton and very low cut pants. She also wore pink underware that was flashed every time she sat down or bent over.

    Description:
    * Early twenties
    * Blonde
    * Very attractive
    * Higly fit (washboard stomach)
    * Perfect breasts

    I'm not making this up. I swear.


    I'm sorry, your claim is in violation of Rule 15.
  • blm 2008-06-06 12:31
    I agree, assuming the tests were on point, that sounded like a reasonable interview. Would the poster rather have started with a one-on-one, that asked all the same questions that were on the test? That would waste both the interviewer's and interviewee's time.
  • Andrew 2008-06-06 14:06
    I worked with a pair of women who would show off some part of their body on purpose. It was part of the interview. It’s a test to see how cool you react. Best to just smile and spend more time looking them in the eyes. Anytime they were able to arouse someone they ended the interview. Their reason was that if you couldn’t handle the pressure of the interview by a hot woman then you’d probably fold under the pressure of you job too.
  • Anonymous Coward 2008-06-06 14:16
    FIND THE COMMENT!!!!
  • KenW 2008-06-06 15:33
    BT:
    AT:
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.

    Or, in the worst case, it leaves the impression that you noticed the "clothing failure" and went for a quick wank in the restroom...


    Nice. So you not only failed to notice that 20 or so others had already posted the same thing, but then also decided you needed to post twice, with and without quoting the post you were needlessly replying to yet again. Thanks - there's never enough useless tripe here.
  • TZ 2008-06-06 16:23
    Should of told the bosom (I mean business) woman that you liked her shoes.
  • Uh huh 2008-06-06 18:13
    >> Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break.

    Oh, right, the poor woman's top comes open and you run to the restroom right away? Hopefully, she'd never put 2+2 together on THAT one.
  • BT 2008-06-06 18:39
    KenW:
    BT:
    AT:
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.

    Or, in the worst case, it leaves the impression that you noticed the "clothing failure" and went for a quick wank in the restroom...


    Nice. So you not only failed to notice that 20 or so others had already posted the same thing, but then also decided you needed to post twice, with and without quoting the post you were needlessly replying to yet again. Thanks - there's never enough useless tripe here.


    No problem, it was my pleasure.
  • Another anonymous (Amish) coward 2008-06-06 21:42
    Robert S. Robbins:
    Why do do people interview for jobs at IBM, Microsoft, or Google? You should come to Pennsylvania and interview for jobs with the Amish. They never ask tough technical questions.

    Sorry...my manager is Amish, as was the former manager--who now has a software company in Asia. Without getting into all the nuances, I'm a variant of Amish as well. And, yes, technical questions are part of the interview process--though aptitude, interest in quality, and willingness to learn are more important than specific technical skills coming in.

    Believe it. :)
  • James O'Boston 2008-06-06 22:03
    Bravo. Very well said.
    or... You tell 'em
    or... TRUTH!

    in any case, trusting your instincts is a really good thing at times like these. A job is a commitment for a really long time...
  • James O'Boston 2008-06-06 22:06
    Robert S. Robbins:
    Why do do people interview for jobs at IBM, Microsoft, or Google? You should come to Pennsylvania and interview for jobs with the Amish. They never ask tough technical questions.


    and the pies! The sweet, flaky-crusted Amish pies!
  • andy brummer 2008-06-06 23:06
    Either way you're fixed for life.
  • andy brummer 2008-06-06 23:07
    chrome:
    Phil:
    I reckon you should have grabbed a penny from your pocket and aimed at the cleavage. If you land it in there, the job is yours.


    Lawsuit, job, they're both the same really.


    Either way you're fixed for life.
  • Edward Royce 2008-06-07 10:27
    spinn:
    AT:
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.


    To be honest, I don't think "I need some time alone in the bathroom RIGHT NOW" would really have been the right response, either.


    Though a camera equipped phone + bathroom break would be killer.
  • Edward Royce 2008-06-07 10:29
    Andrew:
    I worked with a pair of women who would show off some part of their body on purpose. It was part of the interview. It’s a test to see how cool you react. Best to just smile and spend more time looking them in the eyes. Anytime they were able to arouse someone they ended the interview. Their reason was that if you couldn’t handle the pressure of the interview by a hot woman then you’d probably fold under the pressure of you job too.


    So their office was staffed entirely by women and gay guys?
  • A Person 2008-06-07 10:41
    Andrew:
    Their reason was that if you couldn’t handle the pressure of the interview by a hot woman then you’d probably fold under the pressure of you job too.


    Bull. There is a key difference between a hot woman and a stressful job: the latter doesn't have breasts. We're talking totally different degrees of pressure here.
  • dun 2008-06-07 12:09
    Agreed - Hiring is a two-part process: they need to want you, and you need to want *them*. If their behavior in the interview convinces you that you don't want to work there, excusing yourself saves your time and theirs. (Yes, most recruiters/interviewers tend to be very confused at this point, but that's their problem, not yours.) I've walked out on a couple interviews (generally variations on the group interview / everyone's hired shtick.)

    And sadly, it's getting worse: a friend just started a temp job (basic admin ass't work). Turns out they've hired 12 temps, and are narrowing them down reality-show style (here's a project - compete against each other to see who can do it best/fastest). Keep in mind that the job he applied/was hired for was explicitly *temporary* - there was no indication of a possibility of full-time, so the whole thing is pretty amusing at his end (they're tracking and questioning everything in terms of "are you really dedicated to the company"?) Fortunately, he's taking it in good humor (he didn't want the job as full-time anyway, so he doesn't feel the pressure).

    I wonder when "Admin Assistant Survivor" will air? (Outfile, out-staple, out-collate?)[/quote]

    Do you think dropped enough parens in here? This isn't perl you know!

    captcha: nulla - is this a 5GL thang?
  • JOhn Thomas 2008-06-08 10:28
    LOL< dont you just LOVE big corporatins and all the red tape that comes with them. What a joke.

    JJ
    http://www.Ultimate-Anonymity.net
  • real_aardvark 2008-06-08 10:59
    Another anonymous (Amish) coward:
    Robert S. Robbins:
    Why do do people interview for jobs at IBM, Microsoft, or Google? You should come to Pennsylvania and interview for jobs with the Amish. They never ask tough technical questions.

    Sorry...my manager is Amish, as was the former manager--who now has a software company in Asia. Without getting into all the nuances, I'm a variant of Amish as well. And, yes, technical questions are part of the interview process--though aptitude, interest in quality, and willingness to learn are more important than specific technical skills coming in.

    Believe it. :)
    But what about barn-raising?

    You mean, I've done all the prep for the interview, got splinters and calluses all over my hands, and now I realise that all I have to do is to wink at the gal opposite me in the interview and say "Hey ... niiiice bonnet! By the way, one or two of your hooks may have slipped."

    Well, there go my chances of getting off with Kelly McGillis. A shame, really. If a squirt like Tom Cruise could manage it, I'm sure I can.
  • csrster 2008-06-09 03:27
    James O'Boston:
    Robert S. Robbins:
    Why do do people interview for jobs at IBM, Microsoft, or Google? You should come to Pennsylvania and interview for jobs with the Amish. They never ask tough technical questions.


    and the pies! The sweet, flaky-crusted Amish pies!


    and you _never_ have to worry about their blouse-buttons popping open during the interview.

    (Ok, I admit that all that I know about the Amish I learned from "Witness".)
  • Matt 2008-06-09 13:25
    Having grown up in Amish country, my observation is that web development is far far easier than working on an Amish farm. Sure, interview to your heart's content. Maybe I can pass your name along to one of the Yoders or Millers I know, and they'll get back to you via email. Or I could pass along their business cell number.
  • Geoff 2008-06-09 23:13
    And then it dawned on me: I could just leave.


    Could have also resumed after lunch, then stood up after 5 minutes and said "sorry, this isn't the kind of company i'm looking for" and walked out.
  • Dave 2008-06-10 15:56
    AT:
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.


    Yeah right. She is coming unbuttoned and you ran off to the bathroom all of the sudden. That is going to look much worse!
  • Jonah 2008-06-16 17:50
    AT:
    Third option on the popping-top: Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break. That gives her an opportunity to discover and correct her clothing failure while preserving ambiguity as to whether you actually noticed the spill.


    The trouble with that is she might have thought that you definitely *had* noticed the popping top and had rushed to the restroom for an altogether less salubrious purpose ...
  • Tea boy 2008-06-17 04:18
    Plead that you foolishly drank a large cup of coffee/water/soda just before the interview and you desperately need a quick restroom break.


    Don't you think once see realizes her wardrobe malfunction which you failed to point out to her that her next thought might be your some pervert who clearly would have noticed who has run off to the restroom for a little excitement release??

    Still I am not sure there was a right answer for this one!
  • AC 2008-06-17 08:36
    Any bets on how many "But going to teh restroom is making it look like you're going for a wank" replies are coming^Wposted after this post?

    My bet is 7.
  • Peter 2008-06-18 06:07


    I had a interview at a technology development company, with the Manager I would be working for. He started of the interview well with a few searching questions, and then stated that what he really wanted was someone better than his current team...and went on to describe each individual with detailed descriptions of each of their faults and shortcomings.

    On my way out I requested to see the HR person again "to clear up a few admin things". I basically told her that I would not be working there no matter how much they might offer because there was no way I would ever work for a Manager who slaggs off his employees to a complete stranger. She gave me a haunted look and said that she'd had a few comments from previous interviewers, and was looking forward to him retiring the following year. Her and the rest of his team I would guess.
  • j 2008-10-26 16:59
    The high road story reminds me of one of my own experiences.

    I had a high-strung female manager, hot.

    She asked me to resolve a production problem. I don't remember exactly why, but it was beyond my skillset at the time.

    She wanted a resolution. I was the only one she trusted and I had nothing to offer to the situation.

    As she became more desperate, she leaned forward and inadvertently gave me an unobstructed view of her right breast.

    I started looking everywhere, except in her direction.

    On my subsequent performance review she mentioned my decorum that day. Not fair since I wasn't the one flashing.
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  • jakel 2009-04-02 23:33
  • konan 2009-04-24 16:34
  • wm 2009-07-06 05:24
  • Rick 2009-12-28 17:12
    Having spent nearly a year in the hell-hole that is IBM, I can unequivocally state that the "IBM survivor" did the right thing.
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  • rionka 2011-04-23 10:01
    ye, it's called Assessment Center and IBM is still doing this because it's "objective". no tools just lots of paper.
  • Sean 2013-08-16 14:40
    A couple years ago, I applied to a job at a place I left when I was in high school. Apparently I did not leave a great impression because I had a couple write ups that led me to not get rehired. Granted they were the one basing their impression of a 23 year old after their write ups of a 14 year old...
  • Emperor_Z 2014-03-12 15:23
    You probably would have been fine if you'd just said "Excuse me ma'am, but your blouse is coming unbuttoned", instead of just awkwardly pointing at her tits.
  • Late to the party 2014-05-08 01:53
    OK, this is seriously years late.

    But that's a good one, if you ever met the unholy intersection of tech and law.

    Really, it's funny.