The Incredible Shrinking Applicant and More

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  • andrewbadera 2008-05-20 10:01
    *sniffle* I'm outta here.
  • Alan 2008-05-20 10:05
    He sat down at the conference table, and produced a disposable grounding wrist strap from his briefcase. He attached it to a nearby wall outlet, then burst into tears


    I really wasnt expecting the last word to be "tears".
  • Soviut 2008-05-20 10:10
    Up until now I didn't know disposable grounding bracelets existed. I *really* didn't know they had to be plugged into the wall!

    That's like having a life jacket you need to keep submerged in water at all times.
  • Vaitrafra 2008-05-20 10:15
    At least, the cocaine addiction can keep you up the whole night while patching up the system you have destroyed in your last cocaine withdrawal.

    It isn't so amusing.
    P.S. it can even be a cheap yearly bonus.
  • DOA 2008-05-20 10:15
    This isn't exactly the kind of comment people enjoy reading but it's the only thing that comes to mind:
    What... the... fuck?
  • George Nacht 2008-05-20 10:20
    Alan:
    He sat down at the conference table, and produced a disposable grounding wrist strap from his briefcase. He attached it to a nearby wall outlet, then burst into tears


    I really wasnt expecting the last word to be "tears".


    Well, you beat me to it. Unless the ,,tears" was attempt to anonymize it and make the story PG13, (the same apply to substituting ,,extinguished" with ,,composed"). If not, then I am left with mystery, which screams for unveiling.
    Was he as child molested by a man, masked as outlet? Was his mother executed on electric chair by judicial error?
    I just can´t put it out of my mind... Why, why did he cried...
  • yo 2008-05-20 10:21
    i call shenanigans on this article, no way that last half ever happened.
  • shenanigans 2008-05-20 10:25
    yo:
    i call shenanigans on this article

    Yes?
  • IT 2008-05-20 10:26
    The eating-the-sandwich lady and the dirty clothes guy shouldn't surprise anyone who has worked in IT for more than five minutes...

    The others seem like a bit of a stretch. Perhaps they were exaggerated for humorous purposes but were exaggerated a bit too much...
  • yo 2008-05-20 10:29
    what'd you get for #7?
  • Jake Grey 2008-05-20 10:31
    This wouldn't happen to be a British civil service organisation, would it? That would actually explain quite a lot...
  • zappy 2008-05-20 10:32
    George Nacht:
    Alan:
    He sat down at the conference table, and produced a disposable grounding wrist strap from his briefcase. He attached it to a nearby wall outlet, then burst into tears


    I really wasnt expecting the last word to be "tears".


    Well, you beat me to it. Unless the ,,tears" was attempt to anonymize it and make the story PG13, (the same apply to substituting ,,extinguished" with ,,composed"). If not, then I am left with mystery, which screams for unveiling.
    Was he as child molested by a man, masked as outlet? Was his mother executed on electric chair by judicial error?
    I just can´t put it out of my mind... Why, why did he cried...


    What if the outlet was wired wrong? TRWTF is someone put hot on the grounding screw...
  • bd 2008-05-20 10:33
    This story illustrates that you should stick to first semi-competent applicant (hell, she even answered half of a technical question) instead of waiting to the perfect one.

    Also applicable to other areas.
  • snoofle 2008-05-20 10:34
    I recently went on an interview to be an enterprise soa architect. The entire interview process consisted entirely of:

    1. Meeting with potential boss: things move slowly around here, and we don't work long hours, so that makes up for the modest pay - are you ok with a 35 hour week?
    Me: yes
    2. Meeting with potential bosses boss: have you ever done xxx before?
    Me: yes
    3. Phone call with lead tech guy: I don't need to ask any technical questions, but things move very slowly around here, are you ok with that?
    Me: um, yeah, I can read TDWTF all day long!
    *got job offer* (turned it down as I really don't want to die of boredom)
  • brazzy 2008-05-20 10:36
    Soviut:
    Up until now I didn't know disposable grounding bracelets existed. I *really* didn't know they had to be plugged into the wall!

    That's like having a life jacket you need to keep submerged in water at all times.

    Not at all. Wall plugs have a separate ground line, which is the most widely available and convenient way to ground equipment. water and heating pipes are not in every room and don't come with a convenient plug.

    Also, the point of such a bracelet is to protect electronic equipment you're working on from static electricity that might have accumulated in your body, not to protect you from anything. In fact, touching a live wire would MORE dangerous when wearing such a bracelet (unless you're touching it with the arm you're wearing the bracelet on).
  • other_me 2008-05-20 10:39

    "Me: um, yeah, I can read TDWTF all day long! "

    It takes me only about 15 minutes each day. Security Focus - about an hour. So what to do in the rest of the day?

    captcha: commoveo (wth?)
  • appellatio 2008-05-20 10:42
    brazzy:
    unless you're touching it with the arm you're wearing the bracelet on

    That is why the one hand rule is for the ONE you have the strap on, unless you have an ankle strap which then use should use the hand on that side of your body.
  • real_aardvark 2008-05-20 10:50
    This is by far the best OP I have ever read.

    Stuff the comments, Alex/Jake: blue-light the OP.
  • Mister Bee 2008-05-20 10:50
    appellatio:
    brazzy:
    unless you're touching it with the arm you're wearing the bracelet on

    That is why the one hand rule is for the ONE you have the strap on, unless you have an ankle strap which then use should use the hand on that side of your body.


    Heh, he said "strap on".

    catchpa: usitas
  • SQL Warrior 2008-05-20 10:51
    I always wondered why I interviewed well. Now I understand why.

    When I interviewed for my current job, for some reason my now bosses had a huge smile on their faces.

    Now I know why: not only did I know programming, and had the right answers to all the questions (including one "I do not know" when I did not know), but I did not act like a goof.

    When they told me about the previous interviewees, I was in shock...
  • sugarfree 2008-05-20 10:52
    just to point out - the first lady was probably a diabetic, and so REALLY did need the sugar.

    I'm diabetic, and it's so annoying when people don't realise that when you say you need sugar, you mean you could quite easily die if you don't get some. While a sandwich isn't the best way to do it, there's still some carbohydrates there.

    Oh, and when you're low on sugar, your brain doesn't get enough energy, and basically it's the same feeling as if you're really drunk, so talking with your mouth open is very tame (people have been known to take their clothes off or run around screaming...)
  • matt 2008-05-20 10:54
    sugarfree:
    just to point out - the first lady was probably a diabetic, and so REALLY did need the sugar.

    I'm diabetic, and it's so annoying when people don't realise that when you say you need sugar, you mean you could quite easily die if you don't get some. While a sandwich isn't the best way to do it, there's still some carbohydrates there.

    Oh, and when you're low on sugar, your brain doesn't get enough energy, and basically it's the same feeling as if you're really drunk, so talking with your mouth open is very tame (people have been known to take their clothes off or run around screaming...)


    Wouldn't something like some Polo mints be a bit more subtle?
  • SQL Warrior 2008-05-20 10:54
    You can plug them to the ground terminal, that is of course if you have a three-pronged plug. That's actually the best way to ground yourself... when you manipulate sensitive electronic parts like semi-conductors or memory modules.

    If you have a central heating system you can also crocodile clip it to a radiator.
  • SuperousOxide 2008-05-20 10:55
    IT:
    The eating-the-sandwich lady and the dirty clothes guy shouldn't surprise anyone who has worked in IT for more than five minutes...


    The sandwich-lady I could imagine, but you'd think they'd have enough sense not to pick a tuna-sandwich for an interview. If you need to keep your blood-sugar up, there must be a less stinky option when you're trying to make a good impression.
  • You didn't see me right? 2008-05-20 10:56
    sugarfree:

    Oh, and when you're low on sugar, your brain doesn't get enough energy, and basically it's the same feeling as if you're really drunk, so talking with your mouth open is very tame (people have been known to take their clothes off or run around screaming...)


    Now that's an interview I'd like to see.
  • fountainier 2008-05-20 10:57
    Oh, and when you're low on sugar, your brain doesn't get enough energy, and basically it's the same feeling as if you're really drunk, so talking with your mouth open is very tame (people have been known to take their clothes off or run around screaming...)
    Who knew being a diabetic could be so fun?
  • rbonvall 2008-05-20 10:57
    bd:
    This story illustrates that you should stick to first semi-competent applicant (hell, she even answered half of a technical question)
    Not understanding whether her answer was correct or not because she had her mouth full of tuna doesn't count as "answering half the question", Probability Boy.
  • SQL Warrior 2008-05-20 10:58
    No because you have to stay away from glucose. Tuna salad seems normal, as it has little carb in it but she should have eaten a Wasa prior to the interview. The issue is not with her eating during the interview (after all she mentions a handicap) but rather eating see-food as much as seafood.
  • fcardenas 2008-05-20 11:02
    Excuse me, were you selecting the casting for "Lost" or something?
  • DOA 2008-05-20 11:03
    snoofle:
    turned it down as I really don't want to die of boredom
    Think of the downtime as your personal 20% (or more) time. Wish I could spend all day working on my own little hobby projects...
  • Adam 2008-05-20 11:04
    I think the phrase "I just need health benefits" limits it to countries that don't have any kind of sensible healthcare provisions.
  • Adam 2008-05-20 11:05
    Jake Grey:
    This wouldn't happen to be a British civil service organisation, would it? That would actually explain quite a lot...


    I think the phrase "I just need health benefits" limits it to countries that don't have any kind of sensible healthcare provisions.
  • Jay 2008-05-20 11:08
    SQL Warrior:
    I always wondered why I interviewed well. Now I understand why.


    A friend of mine retired from the military not too long ago. Lots of people "retire" from the military long before normal retirement ago, so they have a group to help them find civilian jobs.

    He said the employment counselor reviewed his record and then said, "Oh, you should be easy to place. You show up for work on time and you passed the drug screen!"

    And he thought, That's the criteria? They don't set the standards very high, do they?
  • jjeff1 2008-05-20 11:12
    For the diabetic there are better sources of sugar. When my brother was younger, he carried a small tube of cake frosting. Hard candy is good (as it won't melt in your pocket), orange juice is also good, but not so easy to carry.

    The diabetic should have monitored her sugar better, though some folks aren't symptomatic, they don't realize their sugar is dropping until it's too late. Stress and emotions can play a role as well, it's possible the stress of the interview caused her to crash.

  • ydrol 2008-05-20 11:12
  • Leo 2008-05-20 11:13
    Adam:
    Jake Grey:
    This wouldn't happen to be a British civil service organisation, would it? That would actually explain quite a lot...


    I think the phrase "I just need health benefits" limits it to countries that don't have any kind of sensible healthcare provisions.


    Because Elbereth knows, "sensible" is the first word that comes to my mind when I think about government-run organizations!
  • Alan 2008-05-20 11:14
    SQL Warrior:

    When they told me about the previous interviewees, I was in shock...


    I had the same thing - apparently it was between me and some other guy. At the second interview they asked the usual "Why are you leaving your current job?". I went with "Wanting to move on, find new challenges". the other guy went with a huge rant about how everyone at his work was an arsehole.
  • FredSaw 2008-05-20 11:19
    SQL Warrior:
    The issue is not with her eating during the interview
    I'd say it is. She obviously knew there was a likelihood that her blood sugar would get low; that's how she came to have a sandwich at an interview. She could have eaten it just before she came in rather than during.

    Consider it part of preparation for an interview along with showering, dressing presentably, with your research on the company and your set of questions for them in your notebook, and having gone to the restroom just prior.
  • Jay 2008-05-20 11:20
    When I left my last job, they asked me to interview potential replacements.

    My favorite was the guy who answered every question with a long and mostly irrelevant story. I asked him to tell me about his experience with Java, and he proceeded to tell me about how when he graduated college he was recruited by General Motors and they had this program to recruit college students and so he took the job and moved to Michigan and that was why he was now living in the mid-west even though he was born in California and ... and he never even mentioned Java. I asked him about Web development and he went off on a long story that did at least mention creating a small web site but was mostly about how his employer at the time was mainframe-based and didn't do a lot of web work and he worked on their very first web site and on and on without really telling me anything that gave a hint about his skill level.

    I don't know if he didn't really have any technical skills and he was trying to cover this up or if this was just how he was. But when I told the human resources guy who was overseeing the process essentially what I said in the above paragraph, his reply was, "Yeah, when I called him to set up the interview, I told him where our office was, and he went into this long story about how he used to drive past this area years ago and back then it was an empty field and now they've built all these offices here and it looks so different from how it looked back then and ...." etc etc.
  • Mike 2008-05-20 11:23
    Frankly I think I would have gone with the Tuna-Lady. Yeah, its a little disgusting to see someone chewing with their mouth open and rude to eat during an interview, but she still seems the most normal of all of them.
  • m0ffx 2008-05-20 11:24
    Leo:
    Because Elbereth knows
    Did you _have_ to included a Tolkein reference?
  • The real wtf fool 2008-05-20 11:27
    Alan:

    I had the same thing - apparently it was between me and some other guy. At the second interview they asked the usual "Why are you leaving your current job?". I went with "Wanting to move on, find new challenges". the other guy went with a huge rant about how everyone at his work was an arsehole.


    So you avoided the question with the standard cliche and he told the truth. And they gave you the job? Get out of there as soon as you can...
  • n9ds 2008-05-20 11:27
    bd:
    This story illustrates that you should stick to first semi-competent applicant (hell, she even answered half of a technical question) instead of waiting to the perfect one.


    Remember, this is civil service. I also work for a gov't agency, and it's not that simple, at least not here.

    First, you have to come up with a list of questions to ask, and expected responses with criteria for grading the answers and assign possible point values and percentage weights to each question so that it all adds up to 100. Then you are given a list of "qualified" candidates. Then you ask each one the same questions in the same order to each candidate. You can follow-up on an answer to clarify, but you cannot ask anything outside of the scope of the pre-written questions. The candidates are limited on what they can ask.

    After the interview, the interviewer(s) (preferrably a panel of 3 or more) add up their scores and the highest scorer is the first to be offered the job. What could be simpler? Of course, by the time the forms are scored and has gotten the requisite 8 or 9 signatures required for authority to actually hire the person, he/she has probably already been hired away. But I digress...
  • Salami 2008-05-20 11:27
    I think a lot of people don't want a job, but their spouses or parents make them apply and go to the interview. They then blow the interview so that there is no chance at a job offer.
  • greywar 2008-05-20 11:28
    So I went to this interview, only problem was that my tabletpc was zapping the heck out of me, and I needed it to show some of my code if they asked for some examples, theres this really cool thing with virtual walls in a 3D environment that I was particularly proud of...anyways I digress. I slipped on a disposable grounding strap to keep from getting the daylights zapped out of me.

    One problem-I put it on the wrong hand. I reached in to grab the PC with the other hand, and it proceeded to zap the daylights out of me. And it was BAD, it hurt so much I teared up. I literally sat there being electrocuted for about 5 minutes before something on the pc finally shorted. These insensitive jerks just watched me nearly get electrocuted. I left, no way I wanted to work there.
  • Quango 2008-05-20 11:33
    sugarfree:

    Oh, and when you're low on sugar, your brain doesn't get enough energy, and basically it's the same feeling as if you're really drunk..


    Another good excuse if you arrive for an interview drunk then :)

    Alas my last interview was.. 1997 I think. Since then I've been the interviewer..
  • dmann 2008-05-20 11:36
    Wow these are some messed up interviewees. Why can't I get the hot diabetic woman in any of my interviews?

    Some of my most annoying:
    Interviewing for job that required some 24x7 on call time.
    Person doesn't want to carry a pager. Doesn't have a cell phone. Doesn't have a working computer at home. Would prefer emergencies are between 6am-10pm. That is only 16x7!

    One guy brought a friend to the interview. Luckily the friend just wanted to hang out and eat in our break room and not join us in the interview room. Maybe the friend was scoping out the office facilities for him.

    One person couldn't write the simplest of SQL queries even though it was on their resume. "Other people on the project did that part". So why is SQL on your resume?!?

    The guy that looked and smelled like a dog. I'm commenting on his attire. Dressed from head to toe in black and coming to an interview after playing with your dog is not such a good idea. Actually would have been a good fit for the position except no one wanted to share an office with him.

    We also had someone who spent way too much energy railing on their current employer. A simple "looking for more challenges" would suffice. They deserve some credit if they kept the paychecks coming.

    We always have people that run out of steam in the interview. I think they spend too much energy keeping up a facade and don't have any energy left over to answer questions.

    Still none of them beats the lumberjack resume I received while trying to hire a reports developer a few years back. Actually if this guy wasn't located in the midwest he probably would have had a better shot at this job than anyone. At least the lumberjack had a lot of 'hobbyist' projects in his resume which shows a lot more initiative than the DB candidates we've gotten so far.
  • IT 2008-05-20 11:43
    FredSaw:
    I'd say it is. She obviously knew there was a likelihood that her blood sugar would get low; that's how she came to have a sandwich at an interview. She could have eaten it just before she came in rather than during.


    I've never had a job interview that started on time... That would make it difficult for a diabetic to judge (not even taking into account the stress caused a job interview).
  • Erik 2008-05-20 11:44
    I don't understand why the incompetent cocaine addict was applying for a low-level state government job when she's clearly qualified to become President of the United States.

  • Andrew 2008-05-20 11:44
    other_me:

    "Me: um, yeah, I can read TDWTF all day long! "

    It takes me only about 15 minutes each day. Security Focus - about an hour. So what to do in the rest of the day?

    captcha: commoveo (wth?)


    Wikipedia. (You're welcome.)
  • adk 2008-05-20 11:49
    God, don't you HATE seeing the people that are supposed to replace you?
  • lookaround 2008-05-20 11:50
    I recently went on an interview to be an enterprise soa architect. The entire interview process consisted entirely of:

    1. Meeting with potential boss: things move slowly around here, and we don't work long hours, so that makes up for the modest pay - are you ok with a 35 hour week?
    Me: yes
    2. Meeting with potential bosses boss: have you ever done xxx before?
    Me: yes
    3. Phone call with lead tech guy: I don't need to ask any technical questions, but things move very slowly around here, are you ok with that?
    Me: um, yeah, I can read TDWTF all day long!
    *got job offer* (turned it down as I really don't want to die of boredom)


    If you didn't want the job, why did you keep saying you were OK with the slow pace?
  • Pete 2008-05-20 11:57
    My certainty level about WTF pieces being made up goes up all the time.
  • Alan 2008-05-20 12:05
    The real wtf fool:
    Alan:

    I had the same thing - apparently it was between me and some other guy. At the second interview they asked the usual "Why are you leaving your current job?". I went with "Wanting to move on, find new challenges". the other guy went with a huge rant about how everyone at his work was an arsehole.


    So you avoided the question with the standard cliche and he told the truth. And they gave you the job? Get out of there as soon as you can...


    I have been here for two years now - best job I ever had - really nice company.
  • James 2008-05-20 12:20
    m0ffx:
    Leo:
    Because Elbereth knows
    Did you _have_ to included a Tolkein reference?


    Heh, I took it to be a NetHack reference.
  • Zagyg 2008-05-20 12:24
    yo:
    i call shenanigans on this article, no way that last half ever happened.


    Inclined to agree. Getting 1 or maybe 2 oddballs in a batch of 8 candidates is to be expected, getting 4 total nutjobs in a batch of 4 candidates is stretching it slightly past believable for me. And yes, I do interview for IT positions and have for about 6 years.
  • Edward Royce 2008-05-20 12:24
    Erik:
    I don't understand why the incompetent cocaine addict was applying for a low-level state government job when she's clearly qualified to become President of the United States.



    You shouldn't talk about Hillary Clinton like that.
  • Inertia 2008-05-20 12:26
    2. Meeting with potential bosses boss: have you ever done xxx before?

    Me:No I have not done xxx before and that was not in the job description
  • D-Coder 2008-05-20 12:27
    Andrew:
    other_me:

    "Me: um, yeah, I can read TDWTF all day long! "

    It takes me only about 15 minutes each day. Security Focus - about an hour. So what to do in the rest of the day?

    captcha: commoveo (wth?)


    Wikipedia. (You're welcome.)


    May I also recommend www.computerworld.com -> Shark Tank. Although the literacy level is not at all commensurate with that of the postings here.


    (Captcha: transverbero, how delightfully apropos!)
  • dpm 2008-05-20 12:36
    m0ffx:
    Leo:
    Because Elbereth knows
    Did you _have_ to included a Tolkein reference?
    Did you _have_ to deliberately misspell "Tolkien" in a transparent trolling attempt?
  • Just Saying 2008-05-20 12:37
    Seems pretty unlikely, since the Mr. T guy stated he wanted the job for the health benefits. I'm not terribly familiar with the British system, but my understanding is that everybody has access to the NHS, and further health benefits don't generally come with employment.
  • Just Saying 2008-05-20 12:37
    Just Saying:
    Seems pretty unlikely, since the Mr. T guy stated he wanted the job for the health benefits. I'm not terribly familiar with the British system, but my understanding is that everybody has access to the NHS, and further health benefits don't generally come with employment.


    I'm a dumbass who hit reply instead of quote. The above post is in reference to somebody asking if this was a British organization.
  • Matt 2008-05-20 12:43
    Adam:
    Jake Grey:
    This wouldn't happen to be a British civil service organisation, would it? That would actually explain quite a lot...


    I think the phrase "I just need health benefits" limits it to countries that don't have any kind of sensible healthcare provisions.


    Which is why he said Britain, as it doesn't have sensible healthcare. (I'll gladly use my own money if I don't have to wait a year for needed surgery.)
  • The real wtf fool 2008-05-20 12:47
    Alan:
    The real wtf fool:
    Alan:

    I had the same thing - apparently it was between me and some other guy. At the second interview they asked the usual "Why are you leaving your current job?". I went with "Wanting to move on, find new challenges". the other guy went with a huge rant about how everyone at his work was an arsehole.


    So you avoided the question with the standard cliche and he told the truth. And they gave you the job? Get out of there as soon as you can...


    I have been here for two years now - best job I ever had - really nice company.


    Yeah it's the answer you have to give to that question, otherwise it's unprofessional.
    It makes it seem a bit of a pointless question though. I suppose some people may answer with "well I used to shout all the time, never did any work and was completely useless. So they fired me"
  • Kuba 2008-05-20 12:57
    zappy:
    George Nacht:


    Well, you beat me to it. Unless the ,,tears" was attempt to anonymize it and make the story PG13, (the same apply to substituting ,,extinguished" with ,,composed"). If not, then I am left with mystery, which screams for unveiling.
    Was he as child molested by a man, masked as outlet? Was his mother executed on electric chair by judicial error?
    I just can´t put it out of my mind... Why, why did he cried...


    What if the outlet was wired wrong? TRWTF is someone put hot on the grounding screw...


    The anti-static straps have single-failure-tolerant series bleed resistors. Or should have them, at least. Attaching yourself even to a 240V live wire via a proper (means: not a knock-off) static grounding strap is not supposed to hurt you. Imagine what: someone did actually think of that </sarcasm>
  • Rat 2008-05-20 12:59
    It only uses the earth pin, the other 2 pins are plastic. At least I hope so.
  • Kuba 2008-05-20 13:01
    brazzy:
    Soviut:
    Up until now I didn't know disposable grounding bracelets existed. I *really* didn't know they had to be plugged into the wall!

    That's like having a life jacket you need to keep submerged in water at all times.

    Not at all. Wall plugs have a separate ground line, which is the most widely available and convenient way to ground equipment. water and heating pipes are not in every room and don't come with a convenient plug.

    Also, the point of such a bracelet is to protect electronic equipment you're working on from static electricity that might have accumulated in your body, not to protect you from anything. In fact, touching a live wire would MORE dangerous when wearing such a bracelet (unless you're touching it with the arm you're wearing the bracelet on).


    Touching a live wire while wearing such a bracelet is just as harmless as having it live. It's designed to be safe under such circumstances, dammit. Why do you talk about stuff you have no clue about?

    Disclaimer: if you try it and get killed, don't blame me. Blame not testing your bracelet properly.
  • snoofle 2008-05-20 13:03
    other_me:

    "Me: um, yeah, I can read TDWTF all day long! "

    It takes me only about 15 minutes each day. Security Focus - about an hour. So what to do in the rest of the day?

    captcha: commoveo (wth?)

    I have a very vivid imagination. I don't just skim the articles. I don't just read them. I immerse myself in them. I try to imagine the reality of what led up to, and what happened subsequently to the building/discovery/explosion of the featured wtf, and the people involved therein.

    If you're only spending 15 minutes doing it, you're missing out on "the experience"
  • Frost 2008-05-20 13:03
    SuperousOxide:
    IT:
    The eating-the-sandwich lady and the dirty clothes guy shouldn't surprise anyone who has worked in IT for more than five minutes...


    The sandwich-lady I could imagine, but you'd think they'd have enough sense not to pick a tuna-sandwich for an interview. If you need to keep your blood-sugar up, there must be a less stinky option when you're trying to make a good impression.


    And, in fact, there are: glucose tabs. Think of a Lik'm'aid stick, but round.

    Of course, those are a temporary measure--if you're experiencing a sugar crash, you should take one, and then use the time it buys you (maybe up to an hour or so) to get something more filling, with protein and/or complex carbs.
  • Jason 2008-05-20 13:05
    What's wrong with Tolkein?
  • cpp 2008-05-20 13:10
    Jason:
    What's wrong with Tolkein?


    The "Lord of the Rings" was good, the "Silmarillion" dragged a bit at times.
  • Kuba 2008-05-20 13:12
    greywar:
    So I went to this interview, only problem was that my tabletpc was zapping the heck out of me, and I needed it to show some of my code if they asked for some examples, theres this really cool thing with virtual walls in a 3D environment that I was particularly proud of...anyways I digress. I slipped on a disposable grounding strap to keep from getting the daylights zapped out of me.

    One problem-I put it on the wrong hand. I reached in to grab the PC with the other hand, and it proceeded to zap the daylights out of me. And it was BAD, it hurt so much I teared up. I literally sat there being electrocuted for about 5 minutes before something on the pc finally shorted. These insensitive jerks just watched me nearly get electrocuted. I left, no way I wanted to work there.


    You're just dumb. It wasn't static electricity that hurt you. Static dissipative straps can be worn essentially on any extremity. They become a trip hazard when you wear them on your legs (duh, dude), but apart from that they work just fine.

    As for your predicament -- your tablet PC itself was not a generator of static electricity. Most likely the backlight inverter was somehow shorting to the case somewhere, somehow. Or the mains power supply had bad leakage.
  • snoofle 2008-05-20 13:14
    lookaround:
    {story re interview for slow paces job}


    If you didn't want the job, why did you keep saying you were OK with the slow pace?

    Because the total time for all three interviews was about 10 minutes, and they consisted of 1, 2 and 2 questions respectively; I didn't have much time to formulate an opinion. Afterward, the only thing I recalled was their incessant harping on the uber-slow pace, so I begged off.
  • Brandon 2008-05-20 13:22
    were you expecting "flames" ?
  • FredSaw 2008-05-20 13:23
    Just Saying:
    I'm a dumbass who hit reply instead of quote.
    If you used a registered name you would have access to the Edit and Append buttons after submission.
  • operagost 2008-05-20 13:23
    sugarfree:

    Oh, and when you're low on sugar, your brain doesn't get enough energy, and basically it's the same feeling as if you're really drunk, so talking with your mouth open is very tame (people have been known to take their clothes off or run around screaming...)

    ... while others have realized that they should do their best to eat properly and monitor their blood sugar levels so that they don't embarrass themselves and others.
  • Brandon 2008-05-20 13:25
    Alan:
    He sat down at the conference table, and produced a disposable grounding wrist strap from his briefcase. He attached it to a nearby wall outlet, then burst into tears


    I really wasnt expecting the last word to be "tears".


    Were you expecting "flames" ?
  • th30519 2008-05-20 13:26
    SQL Warrior:
    If you have a central heating system you can also crocodile clip it to a radiator.


    That's odd... *because* I have a central heating system, my home does not require a radiator.>?
  • Dowhat John 2008-05-20 13:27
    Somehow, based on my own experience, the other side of this interview process probably resulted in a few highly talented experts in the field scratching their heads at their rejection letters and wondering why they weren't selected for the interview.

    After all, so many hirers these days pre-filter out the most qualified applicants for all kinds of reasons: too old (over 30); too experienced (past IT experience not exclusively playing computer games); might show current processes up to be inadequate (almost any employer); knows more than the manager (almost any employer); older and more experienced than the manager, etc.
  • FredSaw 2008-05-20 13:30
    Brandon:
    Were you expecting "flames" ?
    Of course not. He was expecting "a thousand little bits of bloody meat".
  • Julian 2008-05-20 13:39
    To be fair, though, any good grounding bracelet will have at least a 1M resistor in-line to minimise the risk of shock.

    In the UK you must not rely on water and heating pipes being grounded as they are often made of plastic, or in older buildings the soil ground stake can be in dried-out ground.
  • John Bigboote 2008-05-20 13:40
    sugarfree:
    just to point out - the first lady was probably a diabetic, and so REALLY did need the sugar.


    That's a sizable assumption. If she were diabetic, I imagine she would say "I'm diabetic." I've met plenty of people who use "I have low blood sugar" as code for "I experience the same diurnal rhythms as everyone else, but I feel the need to blame something."

    These people are usually pains in my ass, and they make me feel bad for my two diabetic co-workers who have to listen to their bellyaching.
  • Ben 2008-05-20 13:45
    This isn't a WTF. If it's true, it's pitiful and heartbreaking
  • T_PAAMAYIM_NEKUDOTAYIM 2008-05-20 13:52
    Cool, could anybody name this movie? I really wanna watch it!
  • SomeCoder 2008-05-20 13:52
    John Bigboote:


    That's a sizable assumption. If she were diabetic, I imagine she would say "I'm diabetic." I've met plenty of people who use "I have low blood sugar" as code for "I experience the same diurnal rhythms as everyone else, but I feel the need to blame something."

    These people are usually pains in my ass, and they make me feel bad for my two diabetic co-workers who have to listen to their bellyaching.


    That's true... I hear that all the time: "I have low blood sugar" when really, they are just hungry and want everyone to feel sympathy for them.

    Real diabetics must hate that.
  • Jon W 2008-05-20 13:55
    Would our local tax dollars would be better spent in cases like this if they were spent on fewer, more skilled workers? Raises for everyone in government!

    But then, those people wouldn't be out in business, working on growing the tax base, so perhaps it's better the way the article describes it.
  • Pope 2008-05-20 14:06
    Mister Bee:
    appellatio:
    brazzy:
    unless you're touching it with the arm you're wearing the bracelet on

    That is why the one hand rule is for the ONE you have the strap on, unless you have an ankle strap which then use should use the hand on that side of your body.


    Heh, he said "strap on".

    catchpa: usitas


    Hehehe... in spanglish that means, "You use it." hehehe... "strap on." </beavis>
  • Kuba 2008-05-20 14:12
    Julian:
    To be fair, though, any good grounding bracelet will have at least a 1M resistor in-line to minimise the risk of shock.


    Worse yet, they actually put two of them in series, usually. You know, if one shorted out. They are so wasteful these days </sarcasm>
  • taylonr 2008-05-20 14:12
    Kuba:
    greywar:
    So I went to this interview, only problem was that my tabletpc was zapping the heck out of me, and I needed it to show some of my code if they asked for some examples, theres this really cool thing with virtual walls in a 3D environment that I was particularly proud of...anyways I digress. I slipped on a disposable grounding strap to keep from getting the daylights zapped out of me.

    One problem-I put it on the wrong hand. I reached in to grab the PC with the other hand, and it proceeded to zap the daylights out of me. And it was BAD, it hurt so much I teared up. I literally sat there being electrocuted for about 5 minutes before something on the pc finally shorted. These insensitive jerks just watched me nearly get electrocuted. I left, no way I wanted to work there.


    You're just dumb. It wasn't static electricity that hurt you. Static dissipative straps can be worn essentially on any extremity. They become a trip hazard when you wear them on your legs (duh, dude), but apart from that they work just fine.

    As for your predicament -- your tablet PC itself was not a generator of static electricity. Most likely the backlight inverter was somehow shorting to the case somewhere, somehow. Or the mains power supply had bad leakage.


    Is it just me, or did the story sound vaguely familiar? Almost as if I had just read it before coming in to the forums. I wonder where, oh where, could I have JUST read a similar story, but from a slightly different perspective?

  • Joe 2008-05-20 14:16
    SuperousOxide:
    IT:
    The eating-the-sandwich lady and the dirty clothes guy shouldn't surprise anyone who has worked in IT for more than five minutes...


    The sandwich-lady I could imagine, but you'd think they'd have enough sense not to pick a tuna-sandwich for an interview. If you need to keep your blood-sugar up, there must be a less stinky option when you're trying to make a good impression.


    Tuna? Consider yourself lucky.

    I WISH this one woman ate tuna at our meeting instead of her roast beef sandwich. That thing stunk up a large conference room to high hell.
  • Jeff Bell 2008-05-20 14:16
    The diabetes issue is part of the lawsuit against Google by their former director of operation, Brian Reid.

    He has type II diabetes, and needs to eat at regular intervals. This was a problem when there were long meetings.

    He was fired 9 days before the IPO, losing out on options worth 10M.
  • Pope 2008-05-20 14:20
    adk:
    God, don't you HATE seeing the people that are supposed to replace you?


    Yes. Especially if they criticize your work... loudly... and talk to other people, including the VP of Operations, about "how retarded is this?" which is your work ... Loudly... Then when they ask you what a "GROUP BY" in SQL does, and it takes an hour and a half and many, many examples before they understand it.

    *Sigh* I wish I was making that up.
  • baronzemm 2008-05-20 14:28
    I had an extremely overconfident friend ask me if they should wear shoes or sandals to their interview. I said that they should wear "interview" clothes and dress shoes.

    Its one thing to look "nice" wearing business casual / trendy clothes. Its another thing to show up to your first interview with dress pants, a t-shirt, socks and sandals.

    So I dont doubt anything from the article.
  • Kuba 2008-05-20 14:28
    Julian:
    To be fair, though, any good grounding bracelet will have at least a 1M resistor in-line to minimise the risk of shock.


    So, for people who can't do the math, that's 500uA (0.5mA) flowing between live, the resistor, through your body, and the ground, under single-fault conditions (one of the pair of 500kOhm resistors shorted-out), anywhere in the world as long as we limit ourselves to "consumer" low-voltage outlets (<250V rms to neutral).

    Or, in other words, it's not gonna kill you, may be merely slightly unpleasant if you're wet/standing on we surface.



    In the UK you must not rely on water and heating pipes being grounded as they are often made of plastic.


    You're not supposed to rely on them anywhere in the world, to the best of my knowledge. Using a water pipe as a grounding source is illegal in most "consumer" cases, in the U.S. at least.
  • atomicthumbs 2008-05-20 14:38
    Indeed, it would've been funnier with "flames".
  • Alan 2008-05-20 14:45
    FredSaw:
    Brandon:
    Were you expecting "flames" ?
    Of course not. He was expecting "a thousand little bits of bloody meat".


    Both excellent submissions... "Song" would also have been acceptable.
  • anotherProgrammer 2008-05-20 14:58
    Same here, I always think you should dress well (biz casual in SF Bay Area), smile a reasonable amount, act interested in the company and its products, respond to questions.

    It's kept me working despite a less than stellar work history and skill set.
  • anotherProgrammer 2008-05-20 15:04
    FredSaw:
    SQL Warrior:
    The issue is not with her eating during the interview
    I'd say it is. She obviously knew there was a likelihood that her blood sugar would get low; that's how she came to have a sandwich at an interview. She could have eaten it just before she came in rather than during.

    Consider it part of preparation for an interview along with showering, dressing presentably, with your research on the company and your set of questions for them in your notebook, and having gone to the restroom just prior.


    Some diabetics don't have that kind of pinpoint control on their blood sugar levels.
  • Skaven 2008-05-20 15:13
    I'm not sure what type of diabetes you are talking about, but I know that for a type 1 diabetic glucose is the normal response to hypoglycemia - glucose tablets when you are still conscious or if you pass out, a glucose injection. My wife is diabetic and I've seen her take glucose hundreds of times.

    Typically you have to eat something more substantial to keep your blood sugar up over time, which might have been what the interviewee was trying to do.
  • Nether 2008-05-20 15:24
    anotherProgrammer:
    FredSaw:
    SQL Warrior:
    The issue is not with her eating during the interview
    I'd say it is. She obviously knew there was a likelihood that her blood sugar would get low; that's how she came to have a sandwich at an interview. She could have eaten it just before she came in rather than during.

    Consider it part of preparation for an interview along with showering, dressing presentably, with your research on the company and your set of questions for them in your notebook, and having gone to the restroom just prior.


    Some diabetics don't have that kind of pinpoint control on their blood sugar levels.


    I'm a diabetic, and maintaining a metabolic process that your body normally handles by itself with an incredibly complicated process is difficult. Human metabolic processes fluctuate drastically and controlling your bloodsugar is not an exact science. Even with the utmost care and preparation taken every hour of every day, your body can and will surprise you when you least expect it. Her bloodsugar could have been absolutely perfect beforehand, and then it could easily have dropped to severely hypoglycemic levels in 20 minutes due to the exercise of entering the building, the stress of waiting, the change of temperature of the environment, and the sudden onset of her monthly period.

    That applicant could have been better prepared. She certainly could have conducted an interview without talking with food in her mouth, but I think some people are overestimating the level of control a diabetic can potentially have over their bloodsugar with current technology.



    By the way, severe hypoglycemia does not feel like being drunk. It's more like having your throat cut, all the blood drained out of you, and then being plunged into a sub-freezing torrential river and drowning.
  • Bob 2008-05-20 15:25
    Not odd. His building uses steam for heat. Yours uses hot air blown thru air ducts.
  • Slashdot hater, but Slashdot READER 2008-05-20 15:52
    WHY do I get the feeling that more and more of these "stories" are just that? MADE UP stories?

    Come on...this is ridiculous.

    What happened to the good ol' days when things that were submitted ACTUALLY HAPPENED???
  • Slashdot hater, but Slashdot READER 2008-05-20 15:52
    WHY do I get the feeling that more and more of these "stories" are just that? MADE UP stories?

    Come on...this is ridiculous.

    What happened to the good ol' days when things that were submitted ACTUALLY HAPPENED???
  • FredSaw 2008-05-20 15:54
    Nether:
    I think some people are overestimating the level of control a diabetic can potentially have over their bloodsugar with current technology.
    I don't know much about it, never having had a diabetic in my family and only one among my friends. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong. I meant no harm by my comments.
  • IT 2008-05-20 15:57
    Slashdot hater, but Slashdot READER:
    WHY do I get the feeling that more and more of these "stories" are just that? MADE UP stories?

    Come on...this is ridiculous.

    What happened to the good ol' days when things that were submitted ACTUALLY HAPPENED???


    You can say that again.
  • IT 2008-05-20 15:58
    Slashdot hater, but Slashdot READER:
    WHY do I get the feeling that more and more of these "stories" are just that? MADE UP stories?

    Come on...this is ridiculous.

    What happened to the good ol' days when things that were submitted ACTUALLY HAPPENED???


    You can say that again.
  • PublicLurker 2008-05-20 16:10
    You didn't see me right?:
    sugarfree:

    Oh, and when you're low on sugar, your brain doesn't get enough energy, and basically it's the same feeling as if you're really drunk, so talking with your mouth open is very tame (people have been known to take their clothes off or run around screaming...)


    Now that's an interview I'd like to see.


    Even if it's the guy with the gold chains?
  • real_aardvark 2008-05-20 16:25
    Slashdot hater, but Slashdot READER:
    WHY do I get the feeling that more and more of these "stories" are just that? MADE UP stories?

    Come on...this is ridiculous.

    What happened to the good ol' days when things that were submitted ACTUALLY HAPPENED???
    Those days are past.

    These days, we're more into the post-modern thing, where we just make up anything we feel like and call it "art."

    In the future, we're thinking of going back to things that actually happened, just to confuse people. That way, it won't just be "art:" it'll also avoid law-suits and the need to anonymize.

    I'm thinking of you, MegaGlobalCorp.
  • Ron Jeremy 2008-05-20 16:27
    PublicLurker:
    You didn't see me right?:
    sugarfree:

    (people have been known to take their clothes off or run around screaming...)


    Now that's an interview I'd like to see.


    Even if it's the guy with the gold chains?


    You talkin' 'bout me?
  • Superman 2008-05-20 16:31
    The last applicant's strange behaviors can be easily explained citizens. He was, in fact, Electro-man. Any movement he makes generates enormous amounts of static electricity. So much so, that he's unable to touch a mortal human being without killing them. As it is, he must always wear a grounding strap to keep from destroying anything he touches. Sadly, this lack of human contact has left him emotionally crippled and prone to hysterical outbursts of sobbing.

  • real_aardvark 2008-05-20 16:31
    Adam:
    Jake Grey:
    This wouldn't happen to be a British civil service organisation, would it? That would actually explain quite a lot...


    I think the phrase "I just need health benefits" limits it to countries that don't have any kind of sensible healthcare provisions.
    It certainly doesn't limit it to countries that don't have any kind of sensible job applicants, does it?
  • eryn 2008-05-20 16:39
    taylonr:
    Kuba:
    greywar:
    So I went to this interview, only problem was that my tabletpc was zapping the heck out of me, and I needed it to show some of my code if they asked for some examples, theres this really cool thing with virtual walls in a 3D environment that I was particularly proud of...anyways I digress. I slipped on a disposable grounding strap to keep from getting the daylights zapped out of me.

    One problem-I put it on the wrong hand. I reached in to grab the PC with the other hand, and it proceeded to zap the daylights out of me. And it was BAD, it hurt so much I teared up. I literally sat there being electrocuted for about 5 minutes before something on the pc finally shorted. These insensitive jerks just watched me nearly get electrocuted. I left, no way I wanted to work there.


    You're just dumb. It wasn't static electricity that hurt you. Static dissipative straps can be worn essentially on any extremity. They become a trip hazard when you wear them on your legs (duh, dude), but apart from that they work just fine.

    As for your predicament -- your tablet PC itself was not a generator of static electricity. Most likely the backlight inverter was somehow shorting to the case somewhere, somehow. Or the mains power supply had bad leakage.


    Is it just me, or did the story sound vaguely familiar? Almost as if I had just read it before coming in to the forums. I wonder where, oh where, could I have JUST read a similar story, but from a slightly different perspective?



    10 out 10 for creativity...and a 'WOOOSH' to the second poster unless i'm seriously missing the sarcasm tags. :)
  • Richard C Haven 2008-05-20 16:49
    Alan:
    He sat down at the conference table, and produced a disposable grounding wrist strap from his briefcase. He attached it to a nearby wall outlet, then burst into tears


    I really wasnt expecting the last word to be "tears".


    I was leaning towards "flames" myself <s>
  • wave_man 2008-05-20 16:50
    The real wtf fool:
    Alan:

    I had the same thing - apparently it was between me and some other guy. At the second interview they asked the usual "Why are you leaving your current job?". I went with "Wanting to move on, find new challenges". the other guy went with a huge rant about how everyone at his work was an arsehole.


    So you avoided the question with the standard cliche and he told the truth. And they gave you the job? Get out of there as soon as you can...


    Sorry to say, being able to play politics in the most basic sense is a job-related skill for anyone to cultivate. I rarely like to be around people who feel compelled to tell the "truth", as they would choose to pontificate it, at all times. Thank god for politics.

    wave_man
  • Dennis C. Fait 2008-05-20 16:51
    And meanwhile well-qualifed and brilliant me sits at home unemployed.
  • dun 2008-05-20 16:53
    Are you stupid?
  • Richard C Haven 2008-05-20 16:55
    sugarfree:
    just to point out - the first lady was probably a diabetic, and so REALLY did need the sugar.

    I'm diabetic, and it's so annoying when people don't realise that when you say you need sugar, you mean you could quite easily die if you don't get some. While a sandwich isn't the best way to do it, there's still some carbohydrates there.

    Oh, and when you're low on sugar, your brain doesn't get enough energy, and basically it's the same feeling as if you're really drunk, so talking with your mouth open is very tame (people have been known to take their clothes off or run around screaming...)


    The only way Type II's go hypoglycemic is over-shooting (too much insulin). I just don't shoot up _or_ eat before I will be unable to adjust my blood sugar for a period.

    Type I's are more problematic, as it is a completely different disease.

    Cheers
  • eryn 2008-05-20 16:56
    Jeff Bell:
    The diabetes issue is part of the lawsuit against Google by their former director of operation, Brian Reid.

    He has type II diabetes, and needs to eat at regular intervals. This was a problem when there were long meetings.

    He was fired 9 days before the IPO, losing out on options worth 10M.


    good wiki read
  • Netztier 2008-05-20 17:26
    Nether:

    By the way, severe hypoglycemia does not feel like being drunk. It's more like having your throat cut, all the blood drained out of you, and then being plunged into a sub-freezing torrential river and drowning.


    You forgot to add: the nagging feeling that you just can't shoo away impression that when you turn your head, there's a 7 foot guy in a black hooded cloak with a scythe behind you, grinning at you from a lipless mouth.

    I'll never forget my first hypoglycaemia. It really felt like life energy being sucked from me. Fast.
  • real_aardvark 2008-05-20 17:50
    Netztier:
    Nether:

    By the way, severe hypoglycemia does not feel like being drunk. It's more like having your throat cut, all the blood drained out of you, and then being plunged into a sub-freezing torrential river and drowning.


    You forgot to add: the nagging feeling that you just can't shoo away impression that when you turn your head, there's a 7 foot guy in a black hooded cloak with a scythe behind you, grinning at you from a lipless mouth.

    I'll never forget my first hypoglycaemia. It really felt like life energy being sucked from me. Fast.
    Any other pointless and off-topic comments from diabetics?

    Anyone care to know how my next-door neighbour, when I was a kid (and fell in love with her five-year-old daughter, Helen, who never had children just in case they had genetic diabetes), died?

    I'll give you a clue. It wasn't pleasant.

    It did involve going blind, kidney failure, and one or two amputations, followed by septicemia.

    It didn't involve a tuna sandwich, though.

    People who come up with this sort of stuff in interviews are pathetic assholes and deserve all they get.

    Addendum (2008-05-20 18:09):
    Well, why not?

    in memoriam: Jean Tatum. Much loved.

    Addendum (2008-05-20 18:24):
    (That one's for Helen ... and me)
  • RH 2008-05-20 17:56
    I visualize the grounding man being Tim Calhoun.

    http://members.aol.com/_ht_a/ummmliz/images/forte/calhoun.jpg
  • Welcome to Clinton Nationalized Health Care 2008-05-20 18:26
    After my brushes with government workers, I totally believe this WTF.
  • Kuba 2008-05-20 18:52
    Netztier:
    Nether:

    By the way, severe hypoglycemia does not feel like being drunk. It's more like having your throat cut, all the blood drained out of you, and then being plunged into a sub-freezing torrential river and drowning.


    You forgot to add: the nagging feeling that you just can't shoo away impression that when you turn your head, there's a 7 foot guy in a black hooded cloak with a scythe behind you, grinning at you from a lipless mouth.

    I'll never forget my first hypoglycaemia. It really felt like life energy being sucked from me. Fast.


    Hypoglycaemia, my ass. Ever heard of dementors?
  • RockSteadyEdd 2008-05-20 18:52
    Dennis C. Fait:
    And meanwhile well-qualifed and brilliant me sits at home unemployed.

    Well, you're just not brillant enough!
  • alegr 2008-05-20 19:39
    real_aardvark:
    I'll give you a clue. It wasn't pleasant.

    It did involve going blind, kidney failure, and one or two amputations, followed by septicemia.



    These are caused by uncontrolled high blood sugar. So sad.
  • Balony 2008-05-20 19:52
    How did the coke-sniffing guy get past your verrrry structured screening process??? Sounds really like BS to me. I hope there is a probation process for new guys there.

    Maybe the process is the real WTF.

  • El_Heffe 2008-05-20 21:16
    Slashdot hater, but Slashdot READER:
    WHY do I get the feeling that more and more of these "stories" are just that? MADE UP stories?

    Come on...this is ridiculous.

    What happened to the good ol' days when things that were submitted ACTUALLY HAPPENED???

    Some of these stories do seem ridiculous. But, considering the millions of job interviews that are conducted every year, it seems reasonable that there will be a small handful that will be really wierd.
  • Founder 2008-05-21 00:15
    "Lord of the Rings" took place in a year. "Silmarillion" took place over tens of thousands of years.
  • Nick 2008-05-21 01:19
    dmann:
    One person couldn't write the simplest of SQL queries even though it was on their resume. "Other people on the project did that part". So why is SQL on your resume?!?

    Maybe it's like the military's campaign ribbons, everyone gets one, no matter how minor your participation.
  • loki 2008-05-21 02:03
    Zagyg:
    yo:
    i call shenanigans on this article, no way that last half ever happened.


    Inclined to agree. Getting 1 or maybe 2 oddballs in a batch of 8 candidates is to be expected, getting 4 total nutjobs in a batch of 4 candidates is stretching it slightly past believable for me. And yes, I do interview for IT positions and have for about 6 years.


    Obviously you do not do interviews for "state positions" - the only unbelievable part is that all of the applicants spoke English - I did (off and on) interviews for "state positions" for 12 years, and none of the above applicants are extraordinary ...
  • zzp 2008-05-21 04:22
    I have to post a COMMENT on this website ?!
  • Captain Kibble 2008-05-21 06:19
    '"Silmarillion" took place over tens of thousands of years.'

    It just feels that way when you read it.
  • Ric 2008-05-21 06:32
    Should've hired an applicant who doesn't speak your language at all, so that s/he can handle the angry customer calls calmly.
  • Alan 2008-05-21 06:37
    dmann:
    One person couldn't write the simplest of SQL queries even though it was on their resume. "Other people on the project did that part". So why is SQL on your resume?!?


    I once gave a graduate an interview becuase thier CV mentioned in length a complex web-project they seemed quite proud of.

    When asked about any aspect of the project the above answer was given every time.
  • Matthew 2008-05-21 06:44
    Matt:
    Adam:


    I think the phrase "I just need health benefits" limits it to countries that don't have any kind of sensible healthcare provisions.


    Which is why he said Britain, as it doesn't have sensible healthcare. (I'll gladly use my own money if I don't have to wait a year for needed surgery.)


    Which you can do in Britain as well, if you're one of the very few that does have to wait for a year. Private healthcare is still allowed, you know. However, if you have no money or insurance you still get the treatment.

    And you wouldn't get any additional health benefits in the British civil service.
  • matt 2008-05-21 06:57
    Superman:
    The last applicant's strange behaviors can be easily explained citizens. He was, in fact, Electro-man. Any movement he makes generates enormous amounts of static electricity. So much so, that he's unable to touch a mortal human being without killing them. As it is, he must always wear a grounding strap to keep from destroying anything he touches. Sadly, this lack of human contact has left him emotionally crippled and prone to hysterical outbursts of sobbing.


    Hehehehe. 10/10
  • fetch 2008-05-21 08:00
    yo:
    i call shenanigans on this article, no way that last half ever happened.


    I'm with you on this one. I need a security video or some affidavits or something.
  • galgorah 2008-05-21 08:16
    m0ffx:
    Leo:
    Because Elbereth knows
    Did you _have_ to included a Tolkein reference?


    Yes he did. Just be glad you don't have to work on code libraries written by Morgoth.
  • Greg 2008-05-21 08:40
    IT:
    The eating-the-sandwich lady and the dirty clothes guy shouldn't surprise anyone who has worked in IT for more than five minutes...

    The others seem like a bit of a stretch. Perhaps they were exaggerated for humorous purposes but were exaggerated a bit too much...


    Perhaps you need to get out more an get experience with a broader sweep of humanity. The last place I worked had an applicant bomb out real fast when he was given a form to fill out. No trouble with the form, y'understand. It was that he drew back it horror murmuring, "That's a *blue* pen."
  • KenW 2008-05-21 08:46
    Pete:
    My certainty level about WTF pieces being made up goes up all the time.


    And yet you still read them, and waste our time with nonsense posts.
  • KenW 2008-05-21 08:47
    Edward Royce:
    You shouldn't talk about Barach Obama like that.


    FTFY.
  • SQB 2008-05-21 08:51
    Our final candidate was well groomed, well dressed in a nice suit, and carried a briefcase. He sat down at the conference table, and produced a disposable grounding wrist strap from his briefcase. He attached it to a nearby wall outlet, then burst into tears without a word. A few times, he almost regained his composure, but ultimately ended up fleeing from the conference room without ever saying a single word.
    Shawn G?
  • KenW 2008-05-21 08:58
    anotherProgrammer:
    Some diabetics don't have that kind of pinpoint control on their blood sugar levels.


    Sorry, but I don't buy that. I know several diabetics, and none of them lacks the control over the disease enough to have trouble figuring out: "Hey, I have an interview in an hour, and it should take about an hour too. So I'll need to make sure I eat something beforehand so I don't have blood sugar trouble during the interview."

    Having some common sense doesn't mean you have "pinpoint control". It means you can use your brain for more than a separator between your ears.
  • KenW 2008-05-21 09:28
    Slashdot hater, but Slashdot READER:
    WHY do I get the feeling that more and more of these "stories" are just that? MADE UP stories?

    Come on...this is ridiculous.

    What happened to the good ol' days when things that were submitted ACTUALLY HAPPENED???


    What happened to the good ol' days when idiots didn't post whiney crap? Or when "Slashdot READER"s stayed on Slashdot instead of wasting our time here? Or when people who didn't like the content of a website didn't stay to read it and post BS, but instead used a little intelligence and just DIDN'T COME HERE?
  • George 2008-05-21 09:42
    Sadly, the real WTF is that most best/brightest don't apply to state or non-profit agencies. Making $$ isn't really compatible with that, though you've got as good a chance of making a difference to thousands of people who care about it as you would working at a huge ISV.
  • Anonymous 2008-05-21 09:57
    Um, what company is this? Remind me to stay away from this place. Sounds like management are a bunch of idiots if they can't even filter people correctly during the resume review and I hope you guys are using a phone screen process first to ask those "technical questions". There's no reason for an overly formal process. Just sit the developer down, have them code something simple. Then meet them ask some questions and if you are good with technology you should be able to weed out good people without an 8 hour frigging interview process. Otherwise you guys need to reevaluate your hiring skills and read some IT blogs on how to hire people.

    Sounds like a mom and pop shop to me here.
  • me 2008-05-21 12:39
    It's not "Novell 3" it's NetWare 3.x.
  • Jay 2008-05-21 13:39
    The real wtf fool:
    Alan:

    I had the same thing - apparently it was between me and some other guy. At the second interview they asked the usual "Why are you leaving your current job?". I went with "Wanting to move on, find new challenges". the other guy went with a huge rant about how everyone at his work was an arsehole.


    So you avoided the question with the standard cliche and he told the truth. And they gave you the job? Get out of there as soon as you can...


    Yes, it's crazy, but there are many standard interview questions to which the "right" answer and the "honest" answer are two completely different things.

    I once came across a list of "questions that women ask men to which men routinely give the wrong answer". Examples included, "Do you think she's prettier than I am?" The article explained that the correct answer is, "Of course not baby, you're much prettier than she is." Incorrect answers include, "You're pretty in a different way," and "Yes -- but you're more intelligent."

    Same sort of thing goes for interview questions.
  • Serpardum 2008-05-21 15:23
    I really don't want to leave a comment, I just want the accolades.
  • real_aardvark 2008-05-21 17:37
    KenW:

    What happened to the good ol' days when idiots didn't post whiney crap? Or when "Slashdot READER"s stayed on Slashdot instead of wasting our time here? Or when people who didn't like the content of a website didn't stay to read it and post BS, but instead used a little intelligence and just DIDN'T COME HERE?
    Ummm.

    I don't remember those days.

    I do remember when we didn't have idiots calling themselves "KenW" posting drivel, however.

    (I'd like to say that I remember the days when we didn't have idiots calling themselves "real_aardvark" posting drivel, but, obviously, that would be a logical impossibility.)
  • WildKard 2008-05-21 18:20
    PublicLurker:
    You didn't see me right?:
    sugarfree:

    Oh, and when you're low on sugar, your brain doesn't get enough energy, and basically it's the same feeling as if you're really drunk, so talking with your mouth open is very tame (people have been known to take their clothes off or run around screaming...)


    Now that's an interview I'd like to see.


    Even if it's the guy with the gold chains?


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xpDUs4Q8kg , seems an appropriate place to post this
  • GrigLars 2008-05-21 21:55
    I recently got the same. I was interviewing for a Linux admin position and the head of IT lightly grilled me on basic CCNA-level TCP/IP stuff (what's a VLAN, broadcast domain, simple stuff). I told him I hadn't taken the CCNA in almost 8 years, but I'd give it my best.

    When I was done, he thanked me for trying. He liked hearing me figure out the answers out loud, and complemented me on half the answers getting right "from a non-textbook frame of reference." He then spent the next 15 minutes upset at the last few applicants who had CCNA certs and got nothing right. "You Linux guys know networking better than Cisco guys! Every time! Why is that?" He loved the term "paper tigers," which he had never heard before. It was like we were drinking buddies by the end.

    They didn't give me the job, based on some of what they wanted I didn't know at the skill level required (mostly programming), but profusely thanked me for coming in like they had never seen a Linux admin who was personable or something.
  • Random832 2008-05-22 11:22
    Kuba:
    greywar:
    So I went to this interview, only problem was that my tabletpc was zapping the heck out of me, and I needed it to show some of my code if they asked for some examples, theres this really cool thing with virtual walls in a 3D environment that I was particularly proud of...anyways I digress. I slipped on a disposable grounding strap to keep from getting the daylights zapped out of me.

    One problem-I put it on the wrong hand. I reached in to grab the PC with the other hand, and it proceeded to zap the daylights out of me. And it was BAD, it hurt so much I teared up. I literally sat there being electrocuted for about 5 minutes before something on the pc finally shorted. These insensitive jerks just watched me nearly get electrocuted. I left, no way I wanted to work there.


    You're just dumb. It wasn't static electricity that hurt you. Static dissipative straps can be worn essentially on any extremity. They become a trip hazard when you wear them on your legs (duh, dude), but apart from that they work just fine.

    As for your predicament -- your tablet PC itself was not a generator of static electricity. Most likely the backlight inverter was somehow shorting to the case somewhere, somehow. Or the mains power supply had bad leakage.


    Or he's one of those jerks who goes to a forum and pretends to be the person on the other side of the funny story that was just posted, complete with an unlikely explanation for the person's antics.
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-05-22 12:10
    Vaitrafra:
    At least, the cocaine addiction can keep you up the whole night while patching up the system you have destroyed in your last cocaine withdrawal.

    It isn't so amusing.
    P.S. it can even be a cheap yearly bonus.


    Well if it's cheap then plz send me teh cocz.

    CAPTCHA: saluto - Hi, it's me!
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-05-22 17:07
    th30519:
    SQL Warrior:
    If you have a central heating system you can also crocodile clip it to a radiator.


    That's odd... *because* I have a central heating system, my home does not require a radiator.>?


    The question was if you can crocodile clip it to a radiator, and I'm sure you can. I just wonder what the effect will be.
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-05-22 17:45
    Dowhat John:
    Somehow, based on my own experience, the other side of this interview process probably resulted in a few highly talented experts in the field scratching their heads at their rejection letters and wondering why they weren't selected for the interview.

    After all, so many hirers these days pre-filter out the most qualified applicants for all kinds of reasons: too old (over 30); too experienced (past IT experience not exclusively playing computer games); might show current processes up to be inadequate (almost any employer); knows more than the manager (almost any employer); older and more experienced than the manager, etc.


    Hmmm! OK, I'm in Europe and that may make a difference. I am well over 40, have some 15 years of experience (OK, it's VB and stuff) what means that I know that everywhere there are enterprisy solutions. They had consultants in their house. Hence, it's a headache all the time. If this was not the case I wouldn't have a job today.

    And BTW: of course, there are better ways to do things. But all that crap has often grown in 10 to 30, maybe 40 years. Logically, YOU know how to make it better. The problem is only that a change involves many people. And processes, procedures, I don't know what.
    The little change YOU (no, not you, just you) ask for is a major change. You would not change just one procedure but also those which have dependencies.

    And YARRRRRRRR!
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-05-22 18:04
    John Bigboote:
    sugarfree:
    just to point out - the first lady was probably a diabetic, and so REALLY did need the sugar.


    That's a sizable assumption. If she were diabetic, I imagine she would say "I'm diabetic." I've met plenty of people who use "I have low blood sugar" as code for "I experience the same diurnal rhythms as everyone else, but I feel the need to blame something."

    These people are usually pains in my ass, and they make me feel bad for my two diabetic co-workers who have to listen to their bellyaching.


    Did they tell you during the interview? How did you react?
    Please tell us in four or five sentences.
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-05-22 18:10
    [quote user="Ben"]This isn't a WTF. If it's true, it's pitiful and heartbreaking [/quote

    Sniff!

    (Sorry, had some glassesssss)
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-05-22 18:22
    Jon W:
    Would our local tax dollars would be better spent in cases like this if they were spent on fewer, more skilled workers? Raises for everyone in government!

    But then, those people wouldn't be out in business, working on growing the tax base, so perhaps it's better the way the article describes it.


    At least, the money would be used for spelllllllling courses.
  • real_aardvark 2008-05-22 20:14
    ClaudeSuck.de:
    Ben:
    This isn't a WTF. If it's true, it's pitiful and heartbreaking


    Sniff!

    (Sorry, had some glassesssss)
    Well, there goes that diabetic stuff, I suppose.

    Thanks, Claude.

    We will meet again, in what no doubt will be a sugar-free environment.
  • real_aardvark 2008-05-22 20:21
    alegr:
    real_aardvark:
    I'll give you a clue. It wasn't pleasant.

    It did involve going blind, kidney failure, and one or two amputations, followed by septicemia.



    These are caused by uncontrolled high blood sugar. So sad.
    Thanks for the comment.

    We're mostly human round here, but it's nice to have that assumption confirmed.
  • General 2008-05-24 10:28
    shenanigans:
    Yes?


    Glad you're here. Now get 'im!
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-05-27 03:36
    Kuba:
    greywar:
    So I went to this interview, only problem was that my tabletpc was zapping the heck out of me, and I needed it to show some of my code if they asked for some examples, theres this really cool thing with virtual walls in a 3D environment that I was particularly proud of...anyways I digress. I slipped on a disposable grounding strap to keep from getting the daylights zapped out of me.

    One problem-I put it on the wrong hand. I reached in to grab the PC with the other hand, and it proceeded to zap the daylights out of me. And it was BAD, it hurt so much I teared up. I literally sat there being electrocuted for about 5 minutes before something on the pc finally shorted. These insensitive jerks just watched me nearly get electrocuted. I left, no way I wanted to work there.


    You're just dumb. It wasn't static electricity that hurt you. Static dissipative straps can be worn essentially on any extremity. They become a trip hazard when you wear them on your legs (duh, dude), but apart from that they work just fine.

    As for your predicament -- your tablet PC itself was not a generator of static electricity. Most likely the backlight inverter was somehow shorting to the case somewhere, somehow. Or the mains power supply had bad leakage.


    or he's just a dick trying to fool you. This story doesn't sound plausible.
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-05-27 03:42
    FredSaw:
    Just Saying:
    I'm a dumbass who hit reply instead of quote.
    If you used a registered name you would have access to the Edit and Append buttons after submission.


    Not everybody can log on. I am registered but company policies do not allow me to go to the logon page.
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-05-27 03:51
    anotherProgrammer:
    FredSaw:
    SQL Warrior:
    The issue is not with her eating during the interview
    I'd say it is. She obviously knew there was a likelihood that her blood sugar would get low; that's how she came to have a sandwich at an interview. She could have eaten it just before she came in rather than during.

    Consider it part of preparation for an interview along with showering, dressing presentably, with your research on the company and your set of questions for them in your notebook, and having gone to the restroom just prior.


    Some diabetics don't have that kind of pinpoint control on their blood sugar levels.


    ... and some people simply don't get the jobs others can have. Life's a bitch!

    CAPTCHA: sino - doesn't it mean without
  • ClaudeSuck.de 2008-05-27 03:59
    Slashdot hater, but Slashdot READER:
    WHY do I get the feeling that more and more of these "stories" are just that? MADE UP stories?

    Come on...this is ridiculous.

    What happened to the good ol' days when things that were submitted ACTUALLY HAPPENED???


    Could this have something to do with Alex who wanted to change the name but couldn't? This could be a policy of slowly drying out this site without loosing too much face.
  • George 2008-05-27 07:44
    Indeed, 'flames' would have been more interesting.

    Seriously though, I was surprised too.
  • ThatGuy 2008-06-01 15:39
    That's why you carry with you a candy that has quite possibly the most appropriate name ever when carried by a diabetic - LIFESAVERS.

    My father was diagnosed with diabetes 33 years ago and never goes anywhere without a roll of Lifesavers on his person.
  • Frax 2008-06-09 02:58
    I would have hired the diabetic over the cocane addict...
  • Evan Wade 2008-06-11 14:43
    For point of reference, I suppose I should have included that it was a disposable grounding wrist strap of the 3M variety. I don't know whether they still make them, but they used to. He didn't actually manage to attach it to anything- he just tried.

    I can understand your reaction of pure disbelief to the last two applicants, but I am not stretching anything. Civil service agencies get a lot of "preferred referrals" from community based organizations that assist those with substance abuse issues and mental illness (thank you, welfare reform). Unlike a private business, the law required us to interview anyone that passed the basic screening, which is how we ended up with some of these headcases.
  • Anamalous Cowherd 2008-06-17 10:00
    snoofle:
    2. Meeting with potential bosses boss: have you ever done xxx before?

    /me does a Mr Spock style eyebrow raise.
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  • sinrtb 2008-12-30 06:18
    I don't think you understand type 1 diabetes. Preparing for low bloodsugar is having the sandwich. You cant just eat it because you might have low bloodsugar later.
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  • hoodaticus 2009-03-25 02:43
    brazzy:
    In fact, touching a live wire would MORE dangerous when wearing such a bracelet (unless you're touching it with the arm you're wearing the bracelet on).
    Ignoring the fact that the hand down to the bracelet will burst into flames, and they might even have to amputate...
  • wm 2009-07-06 05:25
  • Rick 2009-12-28 17:15
    Did this state agency happen to be a mental institution (or at least located very close to one)?
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