Remy Porter

Remy escaped the enterprise world and now works as a consultant. Editor-in-Chief for TDWTF.

Feb 2018

It's Called Abstraction, and It's a Good Thing

by in Feature Articles on

Steven worked for a company that sold “big iron” to big companies, for big bucks. These companies didn’t just want the machines, though, they wanted support. They wanted lots of support. With so many systems, processing so many transactions, installed at so many customer sites, Steven’s company needed a better way to analyze when things went squirrelly.

Thus was born a suite of applications called “DICS”- the Diagnostic Investigation Console System. It was, at its core, a processing pipeline. On one end, it would reach out to a customer’s site and download log files. The log files would pass through a series of analytic steps, and eventually reports would come out the other end. Steven mostly worked on the reporting side of things.

All the Rest Have Thirty One…

by in CodeSOD on

Aleksei received a bunch of notifications from their CI system, announcing a build failure. This was interesting, because no code had changed recently, so what was triggering the failure?

        private BillingRun CreateTestBillingRun(int billingRunGroupId, DateTime? billingDate, int? statusId)
            return new BillingRun
                BillingRunGroupId = billingRunGroupId,
                PeriodStart = new DateTime(DateTime.Today.Year, DateTime.Today.Month, 1),
                BillingDate = billingDate ?? new DateTime(DateTime.Today.Year, DateTime.Today.Month, 15),
                CreatedDate = new DateTime(DateTime.Today.Year, DateTime.Today.Month, 30),
                ItemsPreparedDate = new DateTime(2017, 4, 7),
                CompletedDate = new DateTime(2017, 4, 8),
                DueDate = new DateTime(DateTime.Today.Year, DateTime.Today.Month, 13),
                StatusId = statusId ?? BillingRunStatusConsts.Completed,
                ErrorCode = "ERR_CODE",
                Error = "Full error description",
                ModifiedOn = new DateTime(2017, 1, 1)

If It's Stupid and It Works

by in Coded Smorgasbord on

On a certain level, if code works, it can only be so wrong. For today, we have a series of code blocks that work… mostly. Despite that, each one leaves you scratching your head, wondering how, exactly this happened.

How To Creat Socket?

by in CodeSOD on

JR earned a bit of a reputation as the developer who could solve anything. Like most reputations, this was worse than it sounded, and it meant he got the weird heisenbugs. The weirdest and the worst heisenbugs came from Gerry, a developer who had worked for the company for many, many years, and left behind many, many landmines.

Once upon a time, in those Bad Old Days, Gerry wrote a C++ socket-server. In those days, the socket-server would crash any time there was an issue with network connectivity. Crashing services were bad, so Gerry “fixed” it. Whatever Gerry did fell into the category of “good enough”, but it had one problem: after any sort of network hiccup, the server wouldn’t crash, but it would take a very long time to start servicing requests again. Long enough that other processes would sometime fail. It was infrequent enough that the bug had stuck around for years, but finally, someone wanted Something Done™.


by in CodeSOD on

Adam recently tried to claim a rebate for a purchase. Rebate websites, of course, are awful. The vendor doesn’t really want you to claim the rebate, after all, so even if they don’t actively try and make it user hostile, they’re also not going to go out of their way to make the experience pleasant.

In Adam’s case, it just didn’t work. It attempted to use a custom-built auto-complete textbox, which errored out and in some cases popped up an alert which read: [object Object]. Determined to get his $9.99 rebate, Adam did what any of us would do: he started trying to debug the page.