Comment On Classic WTF: The Fully Automated Manual System

My manual automatic system has posted this comment FRIST!

Please write FRIST on your screens manually. Thankyou

So typical and so true.

CAPTCHA: appellatio - quite appropriate!

I'm glad that this message board has a fully automated manual system to resolve errors. I find it ironic that my first attempt to post today came back with:

"An Error Occured

Not sure what it was, but it was logged. A human will eventually look at it. If the problem persists, please Contact Us. If the problem is on the contact form, then ... well ... that pretty much sucks. You can email instead: alexp-at-WorseThanFailure.com.
"

Why does no one trust developers? Seriously we could have taken over long ago, but we're all nicer than that.

More to the point, why do the incompetents end up in management positions instead of being fired like they deserve?

In this case, the CTO deserved to be fired out of a cannon.

Sounds like a membership web site I was required to build once... People filled out their membership information, which got emailed to a sales agent. The sales agents then manually entered the information into the CRM system and ran the credit cards from the CRM using a plugin developed by our department. They didn't want the website authorizing or charging the member's cards. Then I got a continuous stream of "error reports" from the sales agents when people entered their credit card numbers, expiration dates, and CVV numbers incorrectly.

Just makes no good sense why people would want or accept a half of a solution.

~md5sum~

I am still waiting for the CTO to explain why the newly-hired data entry clerks are more trustworthy than the established development employees.

highphilosopher:

Why does no one trust developers? Seriously we could have taken over long ago, but we're all nicer than that.

SOMEONE created, or "developed", the viruses and malware out there... So none of us are to be trusted.

Ah yes, I remember this one well. I don't really have anything new to say about it, I just want to feel involved.

Frank:

highphilosopher:

Why does no one trust developers? Seriously we could have taken over long ago, but we're all nicer than that.

SOMEONE created, or "developed", the viruses and malware out there... So none of us are to be trusted.

Nonsense. That's like saying that SOMEONE created all the biological viruses and microbial nasties out there ; ).

Captcha: damnum. My damnum hand don't have no feeling in it.

How do you fire your manager? I'd use some of that knowledge right now.

highphilosopher:

Why does no one trust developers? Seriously we could have taken over long ago, but we're all nicer than that.

Well, the CTO, which was formerly a developer, did take over.
And then he became a manager.

Hey, this is a case where automation actually creates jobs.

It gives me a warm feeling inside.

Yeah... I'd sooner just not have any WTF for the day than getting an old one. It gets my hopes up that some new juicy article has been posted, and then dashes them when I realise.

"the (mostly implemented) technical details of the new payroll system managed to reach the CTO"

TRWTF is the project plan. Either the CTO needs to sign it off or he doesn't. If he does, get his sign-off before starting implementation.



---
2nd post attempt

Kiss me I'm Polish:

How do you fire your manager? I'd use some of that knowledge right now.

I'd venture to say that if you manage to get this done, you'll be on the way out the door with him in more than half the cases.

The_Assimilator:

More to the point, why do the incompetents end up in management positions instead of being fired like they deserve?

In this case, the CTO deserved to be fired out of a cannon.

I truely believe that it is because of the peter principal.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Principle

Maybe he feared the developers would forget some mundane detail... like a decimal point.

eViLegion:

Yeah... I'd sooner just not have any WTF for the day than getting an old one. It gets my hopes up that some new juicy article has been posted, and then dashes them when I realise.

What the dailywtf needs is a simple CGI param "&user=wuss".

You could have it in there automatically when you log in or, just add it to your bookmark (if you're an anonymous dork like me).

Then Classics would not show up. Posts containing "First", "FRIST", or anything similar could be hidden (unless they were whining about a "FRIST" post). Articles which have minor typos would not show up. Articles and posts with questionable or imperfect grammar would be hidden.

Then this free website could pander to your special needs.

dpm:

I am still waiting for the CTO to explain why the newly-hired data entry clerks are more trustworthy than the established development employees.

They probably didn't even high data entry clerks. At a company I used to work for we used prison labor or out sourced to Eastern Europe data entry.

Ker-Duh!:

The_Assimilator:

More to the point, why do the incompetents end up in management positions instead of being fired like they deserve?

In this case, the CTO deserved to be fired out of a cannon.

I truely believe that it is because of the peter principal.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Principle

In this case, I don't think it's the Peter Principle, as that would imply that he was competent as a developer... obviously not true here.

Frank:

highphilosopher:

Why does no one trust developers? Seriously we could have taken over long ago, but we're all nicer than that.

SOMEONE created, or "developed", the viruses and malware out there... So none of us are to be trusted.

Hey! Don't try blaming this on me. I was just bored...
LOL, sadly I've only made one useful program and it is consider malicious despite legitimately trying to make something useful.

SarahE:

Ker-Duh!:

The_Assimilator:

More to the point, why do the incompetents end up in management positions instead of being fired like they deserve?

In this case, the CTO deserved to be fired out of a cannon.

I truely believe that it is because of the peter principal.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Principle

In this case, I don't think it's the Peter Principle, as that would imply that he was competent as a developer... obviously not true here.

What, no wooden table?

I smell shenanigans...

md5sum:

...People filled out their membership information, which got emailed to a sales agent. The sales agents then manually entered the information into the CRM system and ran the credit cards from the CRM using a plugin developed by our department. They didn't want the website authorizing or charging the member's cards. Then I got a continuous stream of "error reports" from the sales agents when people entered their credit card numbers, expiration dates, and CVV numbers incorrectly.

Man I hope this is not still in use, seeing as it is one big PCI-DSS violation...

codeReign:

LOL, sadly I've only made one useful program and it is consider malicious despite legitimately trying to make something useful.

Don't tell me - you made Windows?

... a digit or two transposed ...

How can a single digit be transposed?

I want to kill that CTO - right after I've killed those "FRIST!" people.

Reminds me somewhat of when our small company was bought by a mid-sized department of a big subsidiary of a huge Fortune 500 company.

For whatever reason, the payroll information was transferred manually to the new company's system. Somehow, numerous people's SSNs had the last four digits replaced with the last four digits of their phone number. (Everyone was picturing punch cards with things on the wrong columns. We probably weren't far off, given the large Fortune 500 IT department mindset.)

This was first noticed when people started going to the doctor, and having their insurance rejected as "not covered". Now, the person in charge of payroll/insurance/etc. was the boss' daughter. (Her information was, of course, correct.) Her position was "well, just pay the [several hundred dollar] doctor bills, and get reimbursed once we straighten things out". This went on for many weeks. (She had no desire or motivation to actually fix it. After all, she didn't have a problem.)

Peter Principle:

What, no wooden table?

I smell shenanigans...

That's what happened at the other side...

They received the fax. Then, because of the "all curled up thermal paper" used, they laid them on a [wooden] table, took pictures of them, scanned in the photos, and printed them out on their color laser printer, which used nice sturdy 60-pound paper, which laid nice and flat for the data entry operators.

If you had your Microsoft-Certified Visual Basic 4.0 Expert certificate from the mid '90s you would know how to do that.

Ozz:

md5sum:

...People filled out their membership information, which got emailed to a sales agent. The sales agents then manually entered the information into the CRM system and ran the credit cards from the CRM using a plugin developed by our department. They didn't want the website authorizing or charging the member's cards. Then I got a continuous stream of "error reports" from the sales agents when people entered their credit card numbers, expiration dates, and CVV numbers incorrectly.

Man I hope this is not still in use, seeing as it is one big PCI-DSS violation...

Last night I talked to one of the developers that still works there, and they're re-vamping the system, but as far as I know, they're still using the same method of getting the information from the customer to the final destination. Funny thing is, the "Solutions Architect" (for that company this means "the entry level developer who makes you do stupid stuff because he thinks it's the right way to go about it") there didn't have any complaints about it. According to him, he used to work as a developer for some big bank somewhere on a service that ran over a million transactions per day... Makes one wonder if people check references at all.

I'm sorry, but the existence of DRM disproves your thesis.

highphilosopher:

Why does no one trust developers? Seriously we could have taken over long ago, but we're all nicer than that.

I'm sorry, but the existence of DRM disproves your thesis.

(Second post attempt. Let's see if the "quote" feature actually works this time.)

highphilosopher:

Why does no one trust developers? Seriously we could have taken over long ago, but we're all nicer than that.

Dear sir,

Your ideas intrigue me and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

Filo Pastry:

Hey, this is a case where automation actually creates jobs.

It gives me a warm feeling inside.

I agree, we should all be thankful for this great visionary. We need more of them...

Instead of having a couple of dev , build a system in a year or so, he allows 6 data entry clerk to have a job indefinitely. PURE GENIUS!

Mason Wheeler:

highphilosopher:

Why does no one trust developers? Seriously we could have taken over long ago, but we're all nicer than that.

I'm sorry, but the existence of DRM disproves your thesis.

(Second post attempt. Let's see if the "quote" feature actually works this time.)

I think I've figured out what's wrong with the posting system. Every time someone submits a comment, poor Alex has to print out the comment, put the printout on a wooden table, photograph it and then re-enter the comment into the database (it's the best way to prevent SQL injections).

Obviously, Alex has been busy with other things (that's why where getting reruns), some of the submits are getting lost.

I can only hope this one gets through!

Filo Pastry:

Hey, this is a case where automation actually creates jobs.

It gives me a warm feeling inside.

The same way if we all transported cargo by human instead of trains, planes, and automobiles, we'd have TONS more people working.

It was sometime during the steam engine days that someone did an analysis of the work saved by industrialization versus the total labor capacity of the humans on the planet. As far back as that time, machines were already doing more than people could do if all machines were removed and work returned to human hands.

The CTO's solution creates jobs the same way ARRA is creating jobs. Make-work programs are a mis-allocation of resources. But hey, maybe being paid to dig holes in the street, then fill them in again might be better than life in a cubicle. Hmmm.....

configurator:

... a digit or two transposed ...

How can a single digit be transposed?

Perhaps:

$2372.89 -> $92372.8

I could do with that kind of transposition (though with my luck it would be the week that they decide to start rounding paychecks to the nearest 10 dollars).

Damn! I always do that!

Nice OS reference

ih8u:

eViLegion:

Yeah... I'd sooner just not have any WTF for the day than getting an old one. It gets my hopes up that some new juicy article has been posted, and then dashes them when I realise.

What the dailywtf needs is a simple CGI param "&user=wuss".

You could have it in there automatically when you log in or, just add it to your bookmark (if you're an anonymous dork like me).

Then Classics would not show up. Posts containing "First", "FRIST", or anything similar could be hidden (unless they were whining about a "FRIST" post). Articles which have minor typos would not show up. Articles and posts with questionable or imperfect grammar would be hidden.

Then this free website could pander to your special needs.

Of course, it would also be a blank page, but that's another matter.

3nd try...

Matt:

Filo Pastry:

Hey, this is a case where automation actually creates jobs.

It gives me a warm feeling inside.

The same way if we all transported cargo by human instead of trains, planes, and automobiles, we'd have TONS more people working.

It was sometime during the steam engine days that someone did an analysis of the work saved by industrialization versus the total labor capacity of the humans on the planet. As far back as that time, machines were already doing more than people could do if all machines were removed and work returned to human hands.

The CTO's solution creates jobs the same way ARRA is creating jobs. Make-work programs are a mis-allocation of resources. But hey, maybe being paid to dig holes in the street, then fill them in again might be better than life in a cubicle. Hmmm.....

Certainly more exercise. Maybe it would help me lose that spare tire...

Re: The Fully Automated Manual System
2006-09-25 18:44 • by mratzloff 93088 in reply to 92956
Reply Quote

Anonymous:
Anonymous:
Is there a site for code wtfs? This is boring.



you're boring!

Yeah, and you're a towel!

This Fully Automated Manual System comment was originally published on September 25, 2006 :P

Dan:

Certainly more exercise. Maybe it would help me lose that spare tire...

No, you'll need the spare tire when you get a flat driving over a ditch that wasn't properly filled back in.

Kiss me I'm Polish:

How do you fire your manager? I'd use some of that knowledge right now.

By quitting

jmucchiello:

Dan:

Certainly more exercise. Maybe it would help me lose that spare tire...

No, you'll need the spare tire when you get a flat driving over a ditch that wasn't properly filled back in.

We obviously need to automate that. I know a CTO who can do that but it's gonna require hiring a lot of people.

dpm:

I am still waiting for the CTO to explain why the newly-hired data entry clerks are more trustworthy than the established development employees.

Legally, the CTO might be completely right and the WTF might not be on his part.

I visited a recycling plant. They process a ton of paper they get from local businesses. However, they aren't allowed to directly process most of the paper those companies print because it's too legally sensitive and has to be shredded. So a third party company comes, takes the paper from the businesses, give to minimum wage people to feed to shredders and then give to the recycling plant. It's not one bit more secure that way since the paper leaves the businesses intact but the legal shredding requirement is met.

I wouldn't be really surprised if the CTO is complying with a similar brain damaged regulation.

Obviously. Then it's just another proof of the Dilbert's Principle.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Dilbert_Principle

I figured out the WTF. The faxers should be adding (and the data entry clerks validating) checkdigits. It will just require buying a number of four-banger calculators and deploying them by the fax machines.

Kiss me I'm Polish:

How do you fire your manager? I'd use some of that knowledge right now.

The best way to screw over a superior is to follow their orders to the letter.