We're Number 0th

by in Error'd on

Drinker Philip B. confesses "The first bottle went down fine but after the second my speech got a little schlurred ..."


Coming to Grips

by in Feature Articles on

Regardless of what industry you're in, every startup hits that dangerous phase where you're nearing the end of your runway but you still haven't gotten to the point where you can actually make money with your product. The cash crunch starts, and what happens next can often make or break the company.

Nathan was working for a biotech company that had hit that phase. They had a product, but they couldn't produce enough of it, cheaply enough, to actually make a profit. What they needed was some automation, and laboratory robots were the solution. But laboratory robots were expensive, and for a company facing a cash crunch, "expensive" was too risky. They needed a cheaper solution.


Don't Do This

by in CodeSOD on

Let's say you were writing a type checker in TypeScript. At some point, you would find that you need to iterate across various lists of things, like for example, the list of arguments to a function.

Now, JavaScript (and thus TypeScript) gives you plenty of options for building the right loop for your specific problem. Or, if you look at the code our anonymous submitter sent, you could just choose the wrongest one.


Not-so-Portable Document Format

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Adrian worked for a document services company. Among other things, they provided high-speed printing services to clients in the financial services industry. This means providing on site service, which is how Adrian ended up with an office in the sub-sub-basement of a finance company. Adrian's boss, Lester, was too busy "developing high-end printing solutions on a Unix system" to spend any time in that sub-sub-basement, and instead embedded himself with the client's IT team.

"It's important that I'm working closely with them," Lester explained, "because it's the only way we can guarantee true inter-system compatibility." With disgust, he added, "They're mostly a Windows shop, and don't understand Unix systems, which is what drives our high-speed printing solution."


Null and Terminated

by in CodeSOD on

There's plenty of room for debate about what specific poor choices in history lead to the most bugs today. Was it the billion dollar mistake of allowing null pointers? Is it the absolute mess that is C memory management? Or is it C-style strings and all the attendant functions and buffer-overruns they entail?

A developer at Jay's company had been porting some C++ code to a new platform. That developer left, and the wheel-of-you-own-this-now spun and landed on Jay. The code was messy, but mostly functional. Jay was able to get it building, running, and then added a new feature. It was during testing that Jay noticed that some fields in the UI weren't being populated.


The Journey is the Destination

by in Error'd on

"As if my Uber ride wasn't expensive enough on its own, apparently I have to go sightseeing East for a little while first," writes Pascal.


Revenge of the Stream

by in CodeSOD on

It's weird to call Java's streams a "new" feature at this point, but given Java's prevalence in the "enterprise" space, it's not surprising that people are still learning how to incorporate them into their software. We've seen bad uses of streams before, notably thanks to Frenk, and his disciple Grenk.

Well, one of Antonio's other co-workers "learned" their lesson from Frenk and Grenk. Well, they learned a lesson, anyway. That lesson was "don't, under any circumstances, use streams".


Just Google It

by in Feature Articles on

Based on the glowing recommendations of a friend, Philip accepted a new job in a new city. The new city was a wonderful change of pace. The new job, on the other hand…

The company was a startup, "running lean" and "making the best use of our runway". The CEO was a distant figure, but the CTO, Trey, was a much more hands on "leader". Trey was part of the interview process, and was the final decision maker for hiring Philip. On Philip's first day, Trey commented on the fact that Philip specifically hadn't gotten a degree in software engineering, but had twenty years of work experience.


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