Comment On Not Too Particular and More

Benjamin Normoyle:

Note: Information is the only word in there that's 'spelled correctly.'
Why was ONLY information marked right? If it's a fatal bug in the checker, I don't think any of the words would have come out right (i.e. a one-off error probably isn't it).

David Walker:

Saying "please hire me" and then saying "I won't be working for you for very long, because I'm too good" is not the way to get a job.

AccessGuru:

David Walker:

Saying "please hire me" and then saying "I won't be working for you for very long, because I'm too good" is not the way to get a job.

The guy was just being honest. Isn't honesty the best policy?

In fact, I would not expect to be long in your employ in that capacity in any case. I have already a highly developed model which I expect would require only minor "tweaking" to entirely encompass your need for a Management Information System.

gabba:

I don't know what Emily is complaining about. At least Oracle's system correctly found that 'information' and 'time' are spelled correctly. Apparently every word must be followed by a comma.

My gift is plain intelligence, at the expense of understanding ...value.

Aaron:

I don't blame him - working COBOL will do that to a man (commence flames now).

dkf:

Ouch! That spell checker output makes my eyes water. A worse UI would be more than a bit difficult to come up with (well, not without actually applying effort...)

Jay:

Which reminds me of an ad I saw for an IT job that said they needed someone experienced in "Cobalt".

Jay:

Which reminds me of an ad I saw for an IT job that said they needed someone experienced in "Cobalt".

Smash:

Jay:

Which reminds me of an ad I saw for an IT job that said they needed someone experienced in "Cobalt".

At first glance it was about programming, but then you find out that cobalt comes from the german kobold (source:wikipedia)

So they obviously needed an experienced RPG player. Maybe you ignored Wizards of the Coast?

shadowman:

It's strange, if you look at the whole resume, the Cali Pizza Kitchen entry is written in an entirely different tense than the the other entries. "To provide additional support to
the Network Manager", etc., whereas the rest of them read like "designed custom programs for..." It's as if he just copied that job description from the classifieds or something.

I really loved the closing line, however:You have the opportunity to hire me and I need work.

Lucky us!

shadowman:

It's strange, if you look at the whole resume, the Cali Pizza Kitchen entry is written in an entirely different tense than the the other entries. "To provide additional support to
the Network Manager", etc., whereas the rest of them read like "designed custom programs for..." It's as if he just copied that job description from the classifieds or something.

Dear Prospective Employer,

My experience matches the description for Software Developer II for which you advertise.

I enjoy working with people to produce a graphic and redundancy-free architecture that brings developers and users into synchronicity. Since creating model is essentially the incipient step under the paradigm of top-down programming, an information architect's work is largely cerebral and removed from the tools with which an application is implemented. It involves gathering requirements from the players (users and management). Then, the architect creates a graphic and/or software representation of primary objects and their relationships to other objects.

The format of the graphic representation has never, and will never, change. It is an art form, and I'm very, very good at it. In fact, I would not expect to be long in your employ in that capacity in any case. I have already a highly developed model which I expect would require only minor "tweaking" to entirely encompass your need for a Management Information System.

If you can offer the environment wherein this service is timely, I am interested in exploring further the possibility of working with you. Thank you for your consideration.

Jeremy:

Congratulations on correctly redacting a PDF document. This high-level skill appears to have escaped numerous government agencies. Perhaps you should consider offering your services as a security consultant?

Nutmeg Programmer:

I bet our friend Donald R. wears white dress shirts with a black, one inch wide necktie, and has never been seen in a sport jacket.

Do they still make plastic pocket protectors?

Izzy:

Try www.pocketprotectors.com. C'mom, you know you want one.

pocketprotectors.com:

"Thanks, I got my pocket protectors today, they are great! Keeps my lab coat from staining and keeps the scissors and scalpels from cutting holes in the bottom of the pockets!" - M. Peterson M.D.

Kederaji:

gabba:

I don't know what Emily is complaining about. At least Oracle's system correctly found that 'information' and 'time' are spelled correctly. Apparently every word must be followed by a comma.

That's, the, new, big, thing, in, business., If, you, can't, follow, the, standards, define, your, own.,

Kederaji:

That's, the, new, big, thing, in, business., If, you, can't, follow, the, standards, define, your, own.,

real_aardvark:

I liked the "wherein."

Is it just me, or is this industry getting more and more psychotic by the day? I used to laugh at resumes like this. (I was young, carefree, and cruel.) Then I felt sorry for the poor bastards. (I was young, carefree, but slightly less cruel.)

Now I'm beginning to think that a substantial number of us need psychiatric help, preferably with strong and powerful drugs. (I am no longer young, and somewhat careworn.)

Is there a way of forwarding things like this to your local mental hospital?

Bob N Freely:

....Now he's emerged into the startling reality of a rapidly evolving industry, where his skill-set is no longer of any value. That's gotta suck.

real_aardvark:

Now I'm beginning to think that a substantial number of us need psychiatric help, preferably with strong and powerful drugs. (I am no longer young, and somewhat careworn.)

AccessGuru:

The guy was just being honest. Isn't honesty the best policy?

ObiWayneKenobi:

"Mercy? You wanted mercy? I'M CHAOTIC NEUTRAL!!"