Comment On Open Sesame

Emmanuel Florac and the rest of his officemates had a bit of a problem: while they could freely leave the office as they pleased, none of them could get back in. Undoubtedly, it had something to do with the new ironclad door and accompanying electronic locking mechanism that was recently installed. Try as they might, no one’s keycard would open the door. [expand full text]
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Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:02 • by JakeyC (unregistered)
Genius!

Captcha: ingenium

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:07 • by Yep (unregistered)
As afternoon grew shorter and the evening approached, the jokingly-proposed “someone’s going to have to sleep at the office tonight” became more and more a reality.

Nice one Alex.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:07 • by halcyon1234
Emmanuel put down his cup of coffee, went upstairs to my computer, and then...


For more, visit wtfslashfic.com (now with Chapter 34 of the Alex/TopCod3r epic)



Note from Alex: I sometimes gets his pronouns mixed up.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:08 • by Bob Dole (unregistered)
Emmanuel put down his cup of coffee, went upstairs to my computer

Really? He went up to your computer, Alex? Just who is this Emmanuel guy?

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:11 • by Ivan Alfaro (unregistered)
I personally use CD drives as an alarm - I just surround multiple drives around my head and set them to trigger at 6am.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:18 • by JimmyVile (unregistered)
Reminds me of that little resetting machine that was featured here a while ago.

Poor little guy kept ejecting his little tray to no avail.
/something in my eye

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:18 • by h (unregistered)
Not nerd enough. They should have used a cronjob.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:22 • by my name is missing (unregistered)
This is how it starts, first the robots open our doors, then they take over the world!

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:23 • by Danny Staple (unregistered)
I know a guy who had problems with his computers, and swore it was haunted. He had an all powerful force feedback joystick that would calibrate itself. At one point, waking up and turning the PC on, he was groggily walloped in the head by the self calibrating stick.
At another point, he had the misfortune of a CD tray ejecting into a sensitive already abused shin. This all may be down to him doing all this in a very compact student room at the time, and grog was most definitely involved.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:24 • by Crabs (unregistered)
That's not a WTF. That's an Awesome...TF.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:30 • by Wrapped in a riddle (unregistered)
MacGyver would be proud.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:35 • by Anonymous (unregistered)
I AM ITDOORMONROBOT!

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:36 • by adi (unregistered)
The original article says:
3) Ran ~# eject /dev/scd0
And, click, the door was opened.

TRWDF: How can you click to submit a command on the SSH ?

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:38 • by Code Dependent
234922 in reply to 234916
Danny Staple:
...and grog was most definitely involved.
Nice.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:39 • by Keithius (unregistered)
234923 in reply to 234915
I, for one, welcome our door-opening robot overlords.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:39 • by jrobbio
234924 in reply to 234921
adi:
The original article says:
3) Ran ~# eject /dev/scd0
And, click, the door was opened.

TRWDF: How can you click to submit a command on the SSH ?


The click of the lock releasing?

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:40 • by Mike (unregistered)
234925 in reply to 234921
You don't, the door switch clicks

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:40 • by George Roberts (unregistered)
234926 in reply to 234921
The *click* is the sound of the door unlocking.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:42 • by Simon (unregistered)
234928 in reply to 234921
I would assume the click is the noise of the lock retracting.

CAPCHA: mara

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:43 • by halcyon1234
234929 in reply to 234923
Keithius:
I, for one, welcome our door-opening robot overlords.


Actually, they welcome you. That is their job.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:43 • by Anonymous (unregistered)
It's the sound of the... oh, never mind.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:45 • by commentor (unregistered)
I appear to have stumbled onto THE DAILY FRICKEN SWEET by mistake.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:48 • by tonecoke (unregistered)
Why the hell wasn't this implemented as a web service with a WAP interface?

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:49 • by Tom Woolf (unregistered)
BRILLIANT!!!

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:49 • by SomeCoder (unregistered)
234936 in reply to 234908
Emmanuel put down his cup of coffee, went upstairs to my computer, and then...


I guess Emmanuel lives with Alex. Not that there's anything wrong with that :)

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:51 • by Neil (unregistered)
I think the WTF is the need to hire a locksmith for their computerized door security system.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:52 • by Sutherlands (unregistered)
234939 in reply to 234935
Tom Woolf:
BRILLANT!!!
Fixed

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 11:58 • by Zecc
234942 in reply to 234909
Bob Dole:
Emmanuel put down his cup of coffee, went upstairs to my computer

Really? He went up to your computer, Alex? Just who is this Emmanuel guy?
He meant
Emmanuel put down his cup of coffee, went upstairs to My Computer, double-clicked the icon, navigated to PuTTY's directory, made a mental note that he really should create a desktop icon for faster access next time, ran it, and then...

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:01 • by mauve (unregistered)
I wish I had unused Shuttles lying around the office.

That said, I gave my old Shuttle to my grandmother, preinstalled with Ubuntu.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:01 • by Code Slave
1) Electronic Pass system without a manual override (traditional tumbler lock) - WTF. All my robot overlords have off buttons.

2) I hope the PC was at least on a UPS. An epic WTF would be to show up during a long term power failure, blown breaker, etc. and not be able to get in.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:05 • by NiceWTF (unregistered)
234946 in reply to 234913
h:
Not nerd enough. They should have used a cronjob.


Also, they should have made it accessible through a website. Preferably an unsecured one.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:09 • by wee
234948 in reply to 234944
Code Slave:
2) I hope the PC was at least on a UPS. An epic WTF would be to show up during a long term power failure, blown breaker, etc. and not be able to get in.


And he goes to all the trouble to find an UPS, installs it, sets the little cable up so he can get notifications if the power goes out, sets up nagios to want him if the box does go down, tests the pager function, test the email alert thresholds, and leaves for the night.

He wakes up at 3am in a cold sweat with the realization that the UPS he stole was the one used for the switch that serves the network segment which covers that room.

But then he goes back to bed because he knows that their border router isn't on an UPS anyway, so fsck it...

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:10 • by ubersoldat
234949 in reply to 234948
wee:
Code Slave:
2) I hope the PC was at least on a UPS. An epic WTF would be to show up during a long term power failure, blown breaker, etc. and not be able to get in.


And he goes to all the trouble to find an UPS, installs it, sets the little cable up so he can get notifications if the power goes out, sets up nagios to want him if the box does go down, tests the pager function, test the email alert thresholds, and leaves for the night.

He wakes up at 3am in a cold sweat with the realization that the UPS he stole was the one used for the switch that serves the network segment which covers that room.

But then he goes back to bed because he knows that their border router isn't on an UPS anyway, so fsck it...


An UPS? Hell! Why didn't they placed two computers there, it's failsafe.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:10 • by Flatline
234951 in reply to 234907
Yep:
As afternoon grew shorter and the evening approached, the jokingly-proposed “someone’s going to have to sleep at the office tonight” became more and more a reality.

Nice one Alex.


Um, that makes perfect sense. What exactly do you have a problem with?

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:16 • by Dirk Diggler (unregistered)
234953 in reply to 234943
mauve:
I wish I had unused Shuttles lying around the office.

That said, I gave my old Shuttle to my grandmother, preinstalled with Ubuntu.
You must really hate the old gal. Did you really stick it to her by setting up the Ubuntu with a wireless card? What am I saying, no one's ever gotten Ubuntu to work with wireless.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:18 • by evilspoons
234955 in reply to 234951
Flatline:
Yep:
As afternoon grew shorter and the evening approached, the jokingly-proposed “someone’s going to have to sleep at the office tonight” became more and more a reality.

Nice one Alex.


Um, that makes perfect sense. What exactly do you have a problem with?


Seconded. That sentence makes perfect sense. Well, except for "afternoon grew shorter", which really ought to be "the remaining part of the afternoon grew shorter" or something.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:23 • by ay ess dee eff (unregistered)
234959 in reply to 234944
Code Slave:

2) I hope the PC was at least on a UPS. An epic WTF would be to show up during a long term power failure, blown breaker, etc. and not be able to get in.

I wouldn't be surprised if a power failure disabled the lock itself as well...

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:30 • by jim steichen (unregistered)
It's a cup holder! No, it's a door opener! Ha, you're both right, the PC-OMatic is both a cup holder and a door opener. The PC-OMatic has a 1001 other uses as well!

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:34 • by moshbox (unregistered)
234965 in reply to 234953
Thanks a bunch. My entire wireless network crashed after I read that.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:35 • by anonymous (unregistered)
Hello? Click is the sound of the door unlocking! Muahahah! How stupid can some people be!

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:35 • by cromulent (unregistered)
234967 in reply to 234929
Ghastly, isn't it? All the doors on this spaceship have been programmed to have a cheery and sunny disposition.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:38 • by Volker Grabsch (unregistered)
<nitpick>

The last command can be shortened to
eject

on modern systems, because eject detects first CDROM device automatically.

</nitpick>

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:45 • by bbqsandwich (unregistered)
You can do this on a Windows machine too, right?. VPN in to the target computer, open My Computer, right-click the CD drive and click "Eject?"

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:46 • by Zach Bora (unregistered)
234971 in reply to 234942
Zecc:
Bob Dole:
Emmanuel put down his cup of coffee, went upstairs to my computer

Really? He went up to your computer, Alex? Just who is this Emmanuel guy?
He meant
Emmanuel put down his cup of coffee, went upstairs to My Computer, double-clicked the icon, navigated to PuTTY's directory, made a mental note that he really should create a desktop icon for faster access next time, ran it, and then...


The initial text was written as "I", "my" etc. and Alex just replaced "I" with "Emmanuel" but forgot the "my" for "his".

CQFD

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:46 • by Spectre
234972 in reply to 234909
Bob Dole:
Emmanuel put down his cup of coffee, went upstairs to my computer

Really? He went up to your computer, Alex? Just who is this Emmanuel guy?


Maybe that was actually Emmanuelle.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:47 • by bbqsandwich (unregistered)
234973 in reply to 234970
bbqsandwich:
You can do this on a Windows machine too, right?. VPN in to the target computer, open My Computer, right-click the CD drive and click "Eject?"


By "VPN" of course I mean "VPN and then Remote Desktop."

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:50 • by Franz Kafka (unregistered)
234975 in reply to 234959
ay ess dee eff:
Code Slave:

2) I hope the PC was at least on a UPS. An epic WTF would be to show up during a long term power failure, blown breaker, etc. and not be able to get in.

I wouldn't be surprised if a power failure disabled the lock itself as well...


It's okay for it to fail locked if there's a manual release on the inside.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:51 • by Bappi
234976 in reply to 234931
Anonymous:
It's the sound of the... oh, never mind.

What? WHAT? Don't leave us hanging here! What was it the sound of?

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:53 • by rleibman (unregistered)
What would have been really cool is if you also told the door opening computer to sigh afterward with the satisfaction of a job well done.

Re: Open Sesame

2008-12-16 12:59 • by Code Dependent
234980 in reply to 234964
jim steichen:
It's a cup holder! No, it's a door opener! Ha, you're both right, the PC-OMatic is both a cup holder and a door opener. The PC-OMatic has a 1001 other uses as well!
Order in the next 15 minutes and get this set of Ronco steak knives at no extra charge! Call now! Operators are standing by to receive your call.
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