Comment On The Italian Job

Last! (Unlikely.)

Alex Papadimoulis:

Within them he found hundreds of thousands of lines of VB6 code with no indentation, no comments, meaningless naming, event-handlers calling other event-handlers, and eleven different projects named

How long until the first anti-VB comment?  I guess 3 posts.

Could've been worse - it could have been buried with cursors for each stored proc that handled each of the tmp tables...

Bus Raker:

Alex Papadimoulis:

Within them he found hundreds of thousands of lines of VB6 code with no indentation, no comments, meaningless naming, event-handlers calling other event-handlers, and eleven different projects named

How long until the first anti-VB comment?  I guess 3 posts.

This ain't because of the tool, it's because of The Tool (developer)

Bus Raker:

Alex Papadimoulis:

Within them he found hundreds of thousands of lines of VB6 code with no indentation, no comments, meaningless naming, event-handlers calling other event-handlers, and eleven different projects named

How long until the first anti-VB comment?  I guess 3 posts.

I'm sure the person that wrote that would be able to write absolute crap in any programming language.

What boggles me is that this thing is probably screamingly common.  Really poor application design hidden behind pretty excel applications, macro generates, and Visual Coffeemaker 'RAD' applications.  The horror is the person that has to come after and maintain it, as is noted here.

But jsut as bad is not the code being maintained, but bogus longwinded transactions like this that no one ever looks at.  "Oh, my SQL Server 2000 is slow!  We have to upgrade to Windows DW (DrainWallet) - that's what Microsoft tells us to do!" - when in fact, stuff like what is listed above is what's happening.

No server, no platform, no tool in the world can compete against incompetent tool users, aka the 'programmers'.

----
dbs
<a href="http://planet-geek.com/">planet-geek.com</a>

The words "huge favor" are code for "what we hired you for."

CAPTCHA:stfu

How do you NOT include the original message? Frist time poster, long time lurker...

Internet jesus wept.

"Heya Francesco, We-a need you for theese-a job! The last-a pro-a grammer, he-a wears a lotsa concrete footawear!"

Alex Papadimoulis:

'ED: mySecondFunction_3, superfluousParameter

Public Function miaFunzioneSecondo_3(superfluoParametro As Variant)

So, the comments were all directly from the babelfish?

 Alex Papadimoulis:


  If (grouppo1 = grouppo3) Or (antony = True) Then

    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 1

  ElseIf (grouppo2 = grouppo3) Or (antony = True) Then

    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 3

  ElseIf (grouppo1 = grouppo2) Or (antony = True) Then

    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 2

  End If

So, if group 1 = 3 then the 3rd 2nd function = 1

If group 2 = 3 then the 3rd 2nd function = 3

And if group 1 = 2 then the 3rd 2nd function = 2

Guess that covers all three possibilities.  Would have been better written as:

Public Function RockPaperScissors(superfluoParametro As Variant)

  If ("rock" = "scissors") Or (antony = True) Then

    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = "rock"

  ElseIf ("paper" = "scissors") Or (antony = True) Then

    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = "scissors"

  ElseIf ("rock" = "paper") Or (antony = True) Then

    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = "paper"

  End If

End Function

And whats up with all variants and no error handling?  

There's got to be double digit WTFs here!

Alex Papadimoulis:

'ED: mySecondFunction_3, superfluousParameter

Public Function miaFunzioneSecondo_3(superfluoParametro As Variant)

  Dim antony, gruppo1, gruppo2, gruppo3 'ED: group

  antony = False



  grouppo1 = ScoprireGrouppo1(m_idA) 'ED: FindGroup

  grouppo2 = ScoprireGrouppo1(m_idB)

  grouppo3 = ScoprireGrouppo2(m_idC)



  If (grouppo1 = grouppo3) Or (antony = True) Then

    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 1

  ElseIf (grouppo2 = grouppo3) Or (antony = True) Then

    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 3

  ElseIf (grouppo1 = grouppo2) Or (antony = True) Then

    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 2

  End If



End Function

I like how he sets a variable of his name to true so that he can debug other parts of his program that depend upon the output of this function.... Ok, so I don't LIKE it, but at least it's obvious enough so that it can't be considered THAT BAD of a wtf (still bad tho, and the rest is HORRENDOUS!).  lol... At least let's just hope that's what he was doing lol....I'd really like to see the other 6000 lines of the query though lol... bheh... lol...

On a side note: looks like we are back to pretty decent, and not abstract WTFs!

P.S. No, I don't blame VB on this one, I blame the developer. Even VB programmers have better design than this lol.

JBL:

Last! (Unlikely.)

lol

JBL:

Last! (Unlikely.)

lol

A few months ago, the person in the cube next to mine had a similar problem. He needed someone to make a few changes to a PowerBuilder application. He was stuck trying to use a coder we all call Hammer ( for what he did to our baseline) . Hammer made the changes and used all default computer generated variable names. The data window was used by many parts of the application and was basically unuseable.

CAPTCHA=perfection

priceless!

Alex Papadimoulis:

'ED: mySecondFunction_3, superfluousParameter
Public Function miaFunzioneSecondo_3(superfluoParametro As Variant)

  Dim antony, gruppo1, gruppo2, gruppo3 'ED: group
  antony = False

  grouppo1 = ScoprireGrouppo1(m_idA) 'ED: FindGroup
  grouppo2 = ScoprireGrouppo1(m_idB)
  grouppo3 = ScoprireGrouppo2(m_idC)

  If (grouppo1 = grouppo3) Or (antony = True) Then
    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 1
  ElseIf (grouppo2 = grouppo3) Or (antony = True) Then
    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 3
  ElseIf (grouppo1 = grouppo2) Or (antony = True) Then
    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 2
  End If

End Function

...

Ln 6271, Col 1

Now that's genuine WTF...

And what's wrong with the temp table lmmtj1MancaAllPubb that it needs to be commented? Why drop lmmtj8MancaAllPubb twice? Where's lmmtj3MancaAllPubb and lmmtj4MancaAllPubb? Oh my head...

and eleven different projects named NewProject1 through NewProject17.


Shouldn't this be NewProject1 through NewProject11?

Alex Papadimoulis:

and eleven different projects named NewProject1 through NewProject17.

What happened to the other 5 projects?

PCBiz:

and eleven different projects named NewProject1 through NewProject17.


Shouldn't this be NewProject1 through NewProject11?

duh, in italy, there are no numbers 4 through 9

DigitalLogic:

Alex Papadimoulis:

and eleven different projects named NewProject1 through NewProject17.

What happened to the other 5 projects?

you mean 6

DigitalLogic:

Alex Papadimoulis:

and eleven different projects named NewProject1 through NewProject17.

What happened to the other 5 projects?

The other 5 obviously never made it into production, so they never integrated them into the NewProjectXX framework. They're probably out there, and they probably still have whatever crappy default name they had when they were created.

Wait...

Or maybe Antony took them with him.....  Job Security.

Or maybe some people drove into their business in three different mini coopers and stole the other 6 projects.  After all this is "The Italian Job"

Alex Papadimoulis:

  If (grouppo1 = grouppo3) Or (antony = True) Then
    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 1
  ElseIf (grouppo2 = grouppo3) Or (antony = True) Then
    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 3
  ElseIf (grouppo1 = grouppo2) Or (antony = True) Then
    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 2
  End If

Now I learned VB but it seems to me that miaFunzioneSecondo_3 will always equal to 1 after going through the above code. wtf???

Maybe I'm not seeing it properly, I'll place the code on a wooden table and.....

I meant to say Ia neve learnde to speaka ina V-a B-a

Anonymous:

I meant to say Ia neve learnde to speaka ina V-a B-a

or to type English for that matter

Did I miss the part where "antony" is ever set to true? I'm guessing no.

Anonymous:

Alex Papadimoulis:

  If (grouppo1 = grouppo3) Or (antony = True) Then
    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 1
  ElseIf (grouppo2 = grouppo3) Or (antony = True) Then
    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 3
  ElseIf (grouppo1 = grouppo2) Or (antony = True) Then
    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 2
  End If

Now I learned VB but it seems to me that miaFunzioneSecondo_3 will always equal to 1 after going through the above code. wtf???

Maybe I'm not seeing it properly, I'll place the code on a wooden table and.....

Only if 'antony' is set to True.

OneMHz:

Did I miss the part where "antony" is ever set to true? I'm guessing no.

No. That's some godawful global or modular-level variable.

PCBiz:

and eleven different projects named NewProject1 through NewProject17.

It's quite obvious. The projects were as follows:

1) NewProject1

2) NewProject2.6

3) NewProect4.2

4) NewProject5.8

5) NewProject7.4

6) NewProject9

7) NewProject10.6

8) NewProject12.2

9) NewProject13.8

10) NewProject15.4

11) NewProject17

 

Alex Papadimoulis:

And thank god they didn't drop table #lmmtj1ManacaAllPubb ... then the procedure would crash.

 

 

Anonymous:

PCBiz:

and eleven different projects named NewProject1 through NewProject17.

It's quite obvious. The projects were as follows:

1) NewProject1

2) NewProject2.6

3) NewProect4.2

4) NewProject5.8

5) NewProject7.4

6) NewProject9

7) NewProject10.6

8) NewProject12.2

9) NewProject13.8

10) NewProject15.4

11) NewProject17

I like folks who think outside the box...

GoatCheez:

P.S. No, I don't blame VB on this one, I blame the developer. Even VB programmers have better design than this lol.

I blame VB for encouraging people to use typeless variables - who knows what grouppo1-3 are?

Variants suck (in anything other than a <100 line script).

But I like the parameter name.

 

I bet there was a lovely On Error statement somewhere - how about a special WTF dedicated to error handling?

Did Francesco exclaim "MI SCUZI!" when he learned that Antony was also "Brillant"?

Anonymous:

Bus Raker:

Alex Papadimoulis:

Within them he found hundreds of thousands of lines of VB6 code with no indentation, no comments, meaningless naming, event-handlers calling other event-handlers, and eleven different projects named

How long until the first anti-VB comment?  I guess 3 posts.

I'm sure the person that wrote that would be able to write absolute crap in any programming language.

Indeed, vb is a great language. It just makes more sense! Just consider this:
If VB Is Nothing Then
compared to  if(VB == null)
Set VB = VB.next
compared to VB = VB.next
Do While Not VB.next Is Head
compared to while(VB.next != head)

It's much closer to natural language, and I think it really is the way to go. I think an improvement would be Set VB To VB Dot Next and Do As Long As Not VB Dot Next Is The Head Of A List. Especially "The" and "A" is missing from most languages, giving them a childish apperance.

CAPTCHA: billgates

Anonymous:

 

I bet there was a lovely On Error statement somewhere - how about a special WTF dedicated to error handling?

I discovered, in our code, an error handler that sent an e-mail to our group notifying us of the error.

This would not normally be a bad thing, but it was in a CATCH block that caught errors in sending an e-mail.

Bus Raker:

How long until the first anti-VB comment?  I guess 3 posts.

Some questionnaire:

- What do you think will be the next big thing in computer programming? X-oriented programming, y language, quantum computers, what?

Linus Torvalds:

I don’t think we’ll see a „big jump”. We’ve seen a lot of tools to help make all the everyday drudgery easier - with high-level languages and perhaps the integration of simple databases into the language being the main ones. But most of the buzz-words have been of pretty limited use.

For example, I personally believe that „Visual Basic” did more for programming than „Object-Oriented Languages” did.

Pretty sure you didn't saw that coming ;)

GoatCheez:

Alex Papadimoulis:

can't be considered THAT BAD of a wtf (still bad tho, and the rest is HORRENDOUS!). 

My poor friend, you have been reading too many of these.  I fear that you have lost sensitivity.  There must be a 12 step program for such ailments.  Bottles or cans will do...

My question to you all is this?  How do you gracefully get out of these ‘welcome to hell’ type jobs?  I am in the middle of one right now…

 

If you see 11 different projects, named form 1 to 17, then maybe there are also some, not-so-different projects. A safety copy, perhaps. As to the function presented, it's obvious that the aim of that function is to find the duplicated value - so it might be used to find those copies. I must admit that using 'Or debug_please_work' technique is not new to me. However, I'd rather not use my name for that purpose - it could annoy the compiler/debugger and in such a moments you'd prefer to calm the beast. The thing that bugz me is...if the script deletes some tables...than it's probably they were used during The Process, but the only process that I've learned about so far, that requires so much "Foto"s, requires also a special kind of tables...wooden

How can this query ever run?

Anonymous:

My question to you all is this?  How do you gracefully get out of these ‘welcome to hell’ type jobs?  I am in the middle of one right now…

 

You can really only fake your own death about once a decade before the authorities start to get wise.

and believe it or not, my situation is with a system that is 'new' and designed like this wtf.... 

load, aim at foot, pull trigger...

-SPT

Obviously the key to the whole procedure is in this line

Alex Papadimoulis:

  Dim antony

I bet Antony = true when he's back from his honeymoon

If (grouppo1 = grouppo3) Or (antony = True) Then

    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 1

  ElseIf (grouppo2 = grouppo3) Or (antony = True) Then

    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 3

  ElseIf (grouppo1 = grouppo2) Or (antony = True) Then

    miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 2

  End If

I haven't seen anyone point out that setting antony=true will always get the first result (miaFunzioneSecondo_3 = 1). You'll never fall through to the elseif's, so why did he bother including the other "Or (antony = True)" statements?

captcha : you have been eaten by a grue :)

oops, just found where Carnildo noticed this... carry on!

John Bigboote:

Anonymous:

My question to you all is this?  How do you gracefully get out of these ‘welcome to hell’ type jobs?  I am in the middle of one right now…

 

You can really only fake your own death about once a decade before the authorities start to get wise.

Well,  we know one trick that works... get married.  Re-marry if need be.

goggles:
    db 90h
    jmp goggles

olsner:

goggles:
    db 90h
    jmp goggles

"Up jumps da boogie, boogie jumps me"
- timbaland & magoo

thatsa spicy meataball!

 

lol, had to...

So it seems that Francesco is getting f***ed  at work while Antony is getting f***ed on his honeymoon.

see, if only you all spoke italian, you would realize 'lmmt' makes the entire program make sense....

I have pretty much respect for people like Francesco because they have the perseverance to hunt down 6271 lines of code in a stored procedure just to find out that their colleague obviously is an idiot.