Ladies and gentlemen: the story you are about to read is true. Only the names have been changed to protect the innocent. The guilty are too obtuse to recognize themselves in the story, even if their names hadn't been changed.
Consider a small European country with more than 20 social insurance institutions, each using their own proprietary software. Now consider sharing data between them. After decades of integration failures, these institutions decided to standardize on a handful of applications. One of these institutions hired Philipp’s firm to migrate their data to DB2.
Philipp’s boss gave him the assignment with a clear conscience. “They have a data transfer interface already established. This should be a quick process.”
Jeremy’s employer, SwissMedia, were upgrading their proprietary CMS to run on new, shiny, PHP5. They planned for bumps in the road, but assembled a rugged upgrade plan with a steel chassis. When the time came to upgrade their largest client, French-Haitian News, Jeremy was behind the wheel.
In life, you will inherit all sorts of things: traits from your direct ancestors, knick-knacks from relatives you tolerated, and sometimes, even money! Of course, there are other things in life that you inherit that you might not even want. The gene for some debilitating disease. The urn filled with the ashes of a relative you particularly despised. Code.
Before he could graduate, Grigori’s Russian university program required him to complete a large-scale, real-world project. Like most of his peers, he planned to use this as an opportunity for job experience, which meant partnering with an outside company. Since Grigori did low-level development and microelectronic engineering, he found a paid internship position with the Russian Automation Institute. RAI has one major client: the company responsible for managing Russia’s nuclear reactors and supply parts for nuclear weapons.
99% of terrible emails are just that. Horrible. However, there's that glimmering 1% of terrible emails that are so bad that they end up being pretty good. Here are a few of them. And, as always, remember - send us your (best) worst emails. We love them!
“Are you Greg?” asked the burly man with a scar from eyebrow to chin. “I’m Mark, your manager.”