OMGWTF Finalist #08: Universal Calculator

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  • TheDan 2007-06-07 10:14
    Love this Tip of the Day:

    "You are the user". Had me laughing out loud.
  • Anon 2007-06-07 10:15
    For numbers, this behaves pretty much as you would expect. For other types, not so much.


    Best..documentation..ever!
  • Your Name 2007-06-07 10:17
    adding colors doesn't seem to work? red+green=yellow
  • BlueKnot 2007-06-07 10:17
    The depth and variety of just "What is a WTF?" continues to amaze... Yeah, I liked the "You are the user" tip too, but when the systray icon popped up a bubble to tell me "the operands have been multiplied!" I cracked up.
  • Your Name 2007-06-07 10:23
    where can i find api for creating new plugins?
  • sirhegel 2007-06-07 10:35
    Now this is just hilarious :-D Absolutely the best entry so far :-D Pure WTF right from starting the application, and the author seems to have great sense of humour.

    Plugins have loaded!
    Yes, no, cancel?

    Did you note that the "Show tips on startup" checkbox cannot be unchecked :-D
  • Someone 2007-06-07 10:41
    Your Name:
    adding colors doesn't seem to work? red+green=yellow


    Red + Green == Yellow where I come from.

    And where I come from is adding the colors of light, as opposed to pigments of some kind.
  • JC 2007-06-07 10:41
    Your Name:
    adding colors doesn't seem to work? red+green=yellow

    That's about what I'd expect.

    Red = 255,0,0 RGB
    Green = 0,255,0 RGB

    255,0,0 + 0,255,0) = 255,255,0 = Yellow
  • Zadok001 2007-06-07 10:42
    This wins the contest.

    No one else thought to make an annoying little pop-up on my taskbar that says "Your calculation is complete!"
  • JokerPokerUberSmoker 2007-06-07 10:44
    BlueKnot:
    but when the systray icon popped up a bubble to tell me "the operands have been multiplied!" I cracked up.


    I'm still in stitches with this one. It's a moment of pure genius!
  • htg 2007-06-07 10:45
    Your Name:
    adding colors doesn't seem to work? red+green=yellow


    Well that is clearly the Additive RGB colour plugin you are using.

    I recommend you create a Subtractive CMYK colour plugin to get the result you desire. Maybe a Pantone plugin? Don't forget that some people are tetrachromats, or the colour of magic.
  • Look at me! I'm on the internets! 2007-06-07 10:50
    Anybody tried negating a picture yet?
    Good times, Good times.
  • (unregistered) 2007-06-07 10:51
    I'm one of Greg D's co-workers, and I have it on good authority that the awesome UI is deeply inspired by our company's standard Lotus Notes template.
  • Saladin 2007-06-07 10:51
    At least he took the time to put drop shadows in for the buttons, there.
  • FDF 2007-06-07 10:53
    Cool

    But error message boxes are wrong, it should be "yes", "no" and "file not found".
  • JokerPokerUberSmoker 2007-06-07 10:54
    My god, this is brilliant! The more I use it, the more WTF it actually turns out to be ...

    From the simple things like the task bar pop up, to the tips that you can't not show at start up (disabled check box), to the wonderful barmy-ness of the UI and the brain-warping calculating colours, pictures and numbers.

    It's simply wonderful and is the best I've seen so far. Well done that man!

    CAPTCHA: Do I really have to type onomatopoeia (twice!)
  • Look at me! I'm on the internets! 2007-06-07 10:56
    Look at me! I'm on the internets!:
    Anybody tried negating a picture yet?
    Good times, Good times.


    Now I can't get it to work again. I did something with pictures, hit the +- button and got reverse colour.

    Can't seem to duplicate it.

  • Alextfish 2007-06-07 10:56
    Hmm. Two apples + three apples = three apples? The author must live in a world with a hefty apple tax.

    That said, this is brilliant. Absurd, almost entirely unusable (I particularly like the way you need to double-click on the numbers to type them in, even once you've assembled yourself a keypad), and definitely WTF.
  • Look at me! I'm on the internets! 2007-06-07 10:58
    JokerPokerUberSmoker:


    CAPTCHA: Do I really have to type onomatopoeia (twice!)


    Sounds like it!
  • dude 2007-06-07 11:04

    It's very accurate for real world scenarios-

    picture of my kid + 2 apples / 4 does = that weird brown color
  • SB 2007-06-07 11:14
    Yay! I killed it!

    3 x Apple = Err = "UniversalCalculator.exe has encountered an error and needs to close. We are sorry for the inconvenience."

    To invert an image, do "<image> +/- =".
  • s0be 2007-06-07 11:15
    But does it implement significant figures?

    How many blues long is the remainder after you divide a waffle by an unladen pidgin?
  • CodingForPretend 2007-06-07 11:20
    s0be:
    How many blues long is the remainder after you divide a waffle by an unladen pidgin?

    Shouldn't that be an "unladen swallow"?


    I know, I know, there's also the obligatory African or European follow up question.
  • RC Pinchey 2007-06-07 11:40
    Wow. This wins the OMGWTF competition, and in fact wins every competition there's ever been, of any kind, ever.

    ...although I'm a little sad inside that there's no "sounds" plugin for it. I want to say hello + 4.
  • Jimmy 2007-06-07 11:40
    CodingForPretend:
    s0be:
    How many blues long is the remainder after you divide a waffle by an unladen pidgin?

    Shouldn't that be an "unladen swallow"?


    African or European?
  • Frost Cat 2007-06-07 11:40
    CodingForPretend:
    s0be:
    How many blues long is the remainder after you divide a waffle by an unladen pidgin?

    Shouldn't that be an "unladen swallow"?


    I know, I know, there's also the obligatory African or European follow up question.


    My question would've been, "which pidgin? Creole or something else?"
  • ender 2007-06-07 11:52
    Was somebody traumatized by Lotus Notes?
  • Hit 2007-06-07 11:58
    Damn. It's going to be hard descision for the judges!

    And while you can't compare apples and oranges, nobody said anything about ADDING them! Or multiplying them...by colors.
  • paint 2007-06-07 11:59
    Alextfish:
    Hmm. Two apples + three apples = three apples? The author must live in a world with a hefty apple tax.

    That said, this is brilliant. Absurd, almost entirely unusable (I particularly like the way you need to double-click on the numbers to type them in, even once you've assembled yourself a keypad), and definitely WTF.

    The calculator ate 2 apples to process your request.
  • TheDan 2007-06-07 12:02
    He's defined a new math concept! Create a new number and make it a letter and then add them. You get -0 ! The entire history of math will need to be revisited.
  • TheDan 2007-06-07 12:05
    guess I was wrong. I hit the negate button instead. Still funny that you can have -0 anyway.
  • dreadlocks 2007-06-07 12:07
    TheDan:
    guess I was wrong. I hit the negate button instead. Still funny that you can have -0 anyway.
    -0 is the insubstantial delta between 1.000... and 0.999...
  • Someone 2007-06-07 12:09
    This doesn't work with WinXP SP2 German:
    "Die Anwendung konnte nicht gestartet werden, weil die Anwenungskonfiguration nicht korrekt ist. Zur Problembehebung sollten Sie die Anwendung neu installieren."
    Translation:
    "This application could not be started, because the application configuration is incorrect. To fix the problem you should reinstall the application"
  • ArieLex 2007-06-07 12:16
    This thing is hilarious, and genius. Sure winner imho.
  • rilarios 2007-06-07 12:19
    Someone:
    This doesn't work with WinXP SP2 German:
    "Die Anwendung konnte nicht gestartet werden, weil die Anwenungskonfiguration nicht korrekt ist. Zur Problembehebung sollten Sie die Anwendung neu installieren."
    Translation:
    "This application could not be started, because the application configuration is incorrect. To fix the problem you should reinstall the application"


    It happened to me with the finalist 7 and 8... I'm using XP in Spanish....

    I think that the lack of localization is also a "feature" of the WTF's!!!!
  • J Random Hacker 2007-06-07 12:20
    Your Name:
    adding colors doesn't seem to work? red+green=yellow


    Red is 2 and Green is 5, so obviously the answer is Violet.
  • Amackera 2007-06-07 13:09
    I don't want to be a killjoy, and I did like this entry, but to me it feels too contrived. There's definitely WTF'ery afoot, but it doesn't feel accidental, or whatever.
  • (unregistered) 2007-06-07 13:16
    Anybody who's been lucky enough to use Lotus Notes as a "Memo" client (lotus doesn't do e-mail, that's not enterprisey enough) on a regular basis has been traumatized by it. It makes me cry myself to sleep at night.
  • too_many_usernames 2007-06-07 13:28
    Hrm. Any time I try to do things with disparate types I either get "Err" or "The number is not normalized! [Abort] [Retry] [Ignore]"

    I can't do your fancy adding 5 and an apple, for instance....

    Addendum (2007-06-07 13:34):
    EDIT: Even when I hit the 'N' button, which I assume means "normalize"....
  • pm 2007-06-07 14:10
    Many of the other ones were overly clever, matching code that architects or PHD produce. THis one is much more like what you get in real life. A really stupid app that does what the user asked for so they cant complain , but they know they are not happy. WHen they argue about it the devs say things like
    "systray is useful for asynch notification" (jargon)
    "we didnt have good specs" (blame the user)
    "the one I did for ACME widgets worked this way and they stole our market share" (FUD)
    ....

    ANd i Havent even looked at the code yet
  • ReiVaX18 2007-06-07 14:25
    this ought to be the heaven for synesthetes.
  • Andrew 2007-06-07 15:54
    I'm getting the "the application configuration is incorrect" error in English WinXP.
  • JF 2007-06-07 15:58
    Look at me! I'm on the internets!:
    JokerPokerUberSmoker:


    CAPTCHA: Do I really have to type onomatopoeia (twice!)


    Sounds like it!


    Ctrl+A, Ctrl+C, Shift+Tab, Ctrl+V...yay the I want the world to see my caption Macro...waffles
  • makomk 2007-06-07 16:16
    Andrew:
    I'm getting the "the application configuration is incorrect" error in English WinXP.


    They're compiled against a very recent version of the Microsoft Visual C++ Runtime that probably isn't available on all systems. (They certainly don't work under Linux using Wine as a result...)
  • Minos 2007-06-07 16:43
    currently lives in a place called “City.”

    Oooh! Greg, have you met The Tick?
  • 0x15e 2007-06-07 18:11
    This is just amazing. I completely just made grape drink with this calculator ({picture of sugar} + {picture of water} + {color dark purple}).

    I mean, just wow. Fantastic.
  • JUST ANOTHER WTF 2007-06-07 18:48
    0x15e:
    This is just amazing. I completely just made grape drink with this calculator ({picture of sugar} + {picture of water} + {color dark purple}).

    I mean, just wow. Fantastic.


    I never bother with a picture for my water... I just drink straight from the tap.
  • chrismcb 2007-06-07 18:53
    Well I'm going to chime in here, and say so far it looks like an easy decision for the judges.
    Yeah this looks like another COOL program. But its NOT a WTF.

    Yeah it does some crazy stuff, some funny stuff. But NOT a WTF.

    Again Alex apparently didn't think there was any WTF code in their to share with us. But it sounds to be like it works (mostly, with some bugs)

    Perhaps I'm mistaked, but I didn't think the programming contest was "find out the coolest way to can implement a calculator"

  • rjnewton 2007-06-07 19:16
    Your Name:
    adding colors doesn't seem to work? red+green=yellow

    Welcome to the world of RGB, mate. I'm afraid your still stuck in grade school here, where the primary colors are red, yellow and blue, and color combinations are based on combining pigments [absorption]. With projective colors, red and green do indeed add up to yellow:
    <html>
    <head>
    <title> Color experiment </title>
    <style type="text/css">
    body {background-color: #ffff00;}
    </style>
    </head>
    <body>
    <p> Hi mate. What color do ya see here? </p>
    </body>
    </html>


    Addendum (2007-06-07 19:33):
    Egads! Sorry folks, forgot to use code tags around the html above.
  • Daniel Beardsmore 2007-06-07 20:03
    The real WTF is that this is the second (of two!) entries that I've tried that don't work in Windows 2000 without visiting the shrine of DLL-Files.com. The OCR one needed VC++ 8 runtime, and this one needs GDIPLUS.DLL (whatever that is).
  • vDave 2007-06-07 22:33
    Look at me! I'm on the internets!:
    JokerPokerUberSmoker:


    CAPTCHA: Do I really have to type onomatopoeia (twice!)


    Sounds like it!


    Best Post Ever (for this forum, at least)
  • vDave 2007-06-07 22:35
    TheDan:
    guess I was wrong. I hit the negate button instead. Still funny that you can have -0 anyway.


    ones-compliment arithmetic?
  • Chaz 2007-06-08 01:43
    I loved this one. My previous favourite was the OMGOCR, but this one has a great back story, and the UI is beautifully counter-intuitive and annoying. None of the others has made me laugh like this one has.
  • valerion 2007-06-08 04:46
    Doesn't seem to work well on mine... never mind, I tried add 8 and a picture of an Orange and it whirred away for a minute and then said "The value is not normalised! Abort, Rety, Ignore"

    Classic stuff!
  • Fowl 2007-06-08 06:53
    Daniel Beardsmore:
    GDIPLUS.DLL (whatever that is).


    That would be GDI+.
  • Jax 2007-06-08 06:55
    God who said this wasn't a WTF?
    This is most certainly a WTF, it might not be an in code WTF but it's definately a "requirements" WTF and a "allowing clever people to embelish the design too much" WTF.

    I think it's genius. I'd give it Apple/10.
  • LC 2007-06-08 07:06
    I agree this isn't WTFy, infact I am considering taking a good look at the plugin architecture for my own uses.
  • Nyuserre 2007-06-08 07:47
    Yup, without having tried to run it, it certainly sounds like it's managed to distill the true spirit of WTF better than any other finalist so far.
  • The Frinton Mafia 2007-06-08 08:27

    The system tray icon that pops up when you FINALLY manage to add two numbers is the funniest thing ever. Officially.

  • ParkinT 2007-06-08 09:13
    It looks like a Slot Machine! Is there a "One-Armed Bandit" plug-in currently in development?
  • Nelle 2007-06-08 09:45
    Someone:
    This doesn't work with WinXP SP2 German:
    "Die Anwendung konnte nicht gestartet werden, weil die Anwenungskonfiguration nicht korrekt ist. Zur Problembehebung sollten Sie die Anwendung neu installieren."
    Translation:
    "This application could not be started, because the application configuration is incorrect. To fix the problem you should reinstall the application"


    Bei mir schon !
    Und es zeigt "Ja", "Nein" und "Abbrechen" anstatt von
    "Yes", "No", "Cancel"

    Translation:

    It works on my computer with XP SP2 German ...
    Ans shows : "Ja", "Nein" und "Abbrechen" instead of
    "Yes", "No", "Cancel"
  • Foobar 2007-06-08 10:53
    I missed the "Silver" and the "Maybe" buttons.
  • anonymous 2007-06-08 13:37
    This one clearly wins it for me.

    Why?

    Because it is the only one that has so far made me, on seeing the screenshot, shout out loud in the middle of a busy office: "What? The? FUCK?!?"
  • Valacosa 2007-06-08 23:46
    You can exit the Universal Calculator to stop using it.

    The "Tip of the day" cracks me up.
  • mh 2007-06-09 07:09
    You can use the Unversal Calculator to add two values together.

    Perfect! Even the typo!
  • Paul 2007-06-11 12:55
    Nelle:
    Someone:
    This doesn't work with WinXP SP2 German:
    "Die Anwendung konnte nicht gestartet werden, weil die Anwenungskonfiguration nicht korrekt ist. Zur Problembehebung sollten Sie die Anwendung neu installieren."
    Translation:
    "This application could not be started, because the application configuration is incorrect. To fix the problem you should reinstall the application"


    Bei mir schon !
    Und es zeigt "Ja", "Nein" und "Abbrechen" anstatt von
    "Yes", "No", "Cancel"

    Translation:

    It works on my computer with XP SP2 German ...
    Ans shows : "Ja", "Nein" und "Abbrechen" instead of
    "Yes", "No", "Cancel"


    This is due to the app compiled against SP1, (version 762 of the C++ RT 8.0). install the CRT8 patch, and you'll be able to launch the app.
  • Look at me! I'm on the internets! 2007-06-12 12:37
    vDave:
    Look at me! I'm on the internets!:
    JokerPokerUberSmoker:


    CAPTCHA: Do I really have to type onomatopoeia (twice!)


    Sounds like it!


    Best Post Ever (for this forum, at least)


    /bows
  • Calli Arcale 2013-05-28 15:50
    Ahhh, finally a calculator that can handle dates in the far future, as seen on Doctor Who! The episode "The End of the World" (second episode of the revival) took place in the year five-point-five-stroke-apple-stroke-twenty-six, after all.