Comment On Sponsor Thanks, ASSorted Out-of-placeness, & More

For the toilet one, don't a lot of Asian countries have basically holes in the ground that you squat over? In that case the instruction might be necessary to stop people from falling in the regular western-style toilet.

Ass first!
(That didn't sound right at all...)

The entrance door on the second floor happened to us too - when we were replacing the deck...

"now how do they get in?"

Side-door anyone?

Alex, while I know you are always on the lookout for material for this site, that keyboard could have been quietly omitted instead. Absolutely nothing of value would have been lost. We want “WTF?!” and not “Eeewwww! Gross!”

The Enter key looks like it has mold on it...

...any other bets?

I believe it's a new species of yeast.
Growing on the keyboard, it now has the ability to Read, and will soon consume our Earth.

We have to nuke it from orbit.

The toilet sign's no WTF, lot of Eastern countries have squat toilets, and not the ones we're used to. Read tonnes of stories of people finding trouble on aeroplanes and the like where they've tried to squat.

St Mary's Hospital for the Infected Keys:

The Enter key looks like it has mold on it...

...any other bets?

That looks like a Scandinavian keyboard, so I suppose maybe it's Wasabröd crumbs. I hope.

Kefer:

"now how do they get in?"

Side-door anyone?

This is actually the basement door. They lifted the house when they realized that the basement door would be subterranean.

"Irgendwas ist immer..." (There's always something (wrong)(?))

Anon:

For the toilet one, don't a lot of Asian countries have basically holes in the ground that you squat over? In that case the instruction might be necessary to stop people from falling in the regular western-style toilet.

It's not that they don't understand how to use a western toilet - it's that they're not used to the idea of physically touching their butt to an object that has been in contact with hundreds of other people's butts during the process of defecation. To some, this is so disgusting that they can't bring themselves to do it.

In the early days of Japan's industrial rise, this was a very common problem in hotels where Japanese business travellers stayed. Nowadays, the squatting-style toilets are dying out in Japan, being replaced by high-tech western-style ones that have more buttons than an airplane cockpit.

brazzy:

Anon:

For the toilet one, don't a lot of Asian countries have basically holes in the ground that you squat over? In that case the instruction might be necessary to stop people from falling in the regular western-style toilet.

It's not that they don't understand how to use a western toilet - it's that they're not used to the idea of physically touching their butt to an object that has been in contact with hundreds of other people's butts during the process of defecation. To some, this is so disgusting that they can't bring themselves to do it.

Happens here too. I've known lots of girls who always use the toilets that way when they're in some really grimy squalid nightclub... and I've known some really grimy squalid nightclubs....

Well, I don't know what's so surprising about "ass sauce". Personally, I prefer a nice green peppercorn sauce on my rump steaks.

brazzy:

Anon:

For the toilet one, don't a lot of Asian countries have basically holes in the ground that you squat over? In that case the instruction might be necessary to stop people from falling in the regular western-style toilet.

It's not that they don't understand how to use a western toilet - it's that they're not used to the idea of physically touching their butt to an object that has been in contact with hundreds of other people's butts during the process of defecation. To some, this is so disgusting that they can't bring themselves to do it.

In the early days of Japan's industrial rise, this was a very common problem in hotels where Japanese business travellers stayed. Nowadays, the squatting-style toilets are dying out in Japan, being replaced by high-tech western-style ones that have more buttons than an airplane cockpit.

I didn't say they didn't understand it. Just that they might be temped to try and squat and end up falling in which is undoubtedly more disgusting that touching the seat! That was probably the purpose of the sign (although it's probably more as a defense against lawsuits if somebody does fall).

MD:

Some people try to squat over the toilets to avoid touching the seat with their bare skin. You know, public toilets tend to get dirty over time.
The problem is that often the toilet will break and hurt the squatter. I saw some pictures at a safety training here... one guy almost severed his leg off.

^ TRWTF

This made me laugh MUCH more than the original story. Wow. How do you even manage that?

...You're supposed to press it with your finger.

Lots of countries use squat toilets. In fact, you can even buy squatting shelves now for standard toilets as it's been shown to be a much more healthy way to poop than sitting on a toilet. Gravity does a lot of the work for you and you're using your muscles in a more natural way. Sit-down toilets are a relatively recent invention after all, and not one we've evolved to use. :-)

Someone You Know:

St Mary's Hospital for the Infected Keys:

The Enter key looks like it has mold on it...

...any other bets?

That looks like a Scandinavian keyboard, so I suppose maybe it's Wasabröd crumbs. I hope.

Looks like congealed grease and dust. You get the same thing in kitchen vents. Hard to clean but still inexcusable.

The second-story door is common in the Michigan upper peninsula. It's for when you have 8 feet of snow.

I wonder how did he press enter. Most keyboards are really dirty if you look under the keys but it is strange that the key is dirty where it is supposed to be pressed. Isn't whatever this is supposed to be scrubbed when the key is constantly pressed?

Our house has a door like that. Part of it used to be a barn and apparently they needed the door to get the hay out or something. How do you get in? Through the door on the ground floor of course! Or with a ladder in case you forgot the key to the normal door. ;-)

I once saw a specials board in a cafe with...

Ass. Cakes
Butt. Scones

...written on it. Got tea all down my shirt when I saw it.

brazzy:

Anon:

For the toilet one, don't a lot of Asian countries have basically holes in the ground that you squat over? In that case the instruction might be necessary to stop people from falling in the regular western-style toilet.

It's not that they don't understand how to use a western toilet - it's that they're not used to the idea of physically touching their butt to an object that has been in contact with hundreds of other people's butts during the process of defecation. To some, this is so disgusting that they can't bring themselves to do it.

In the early days of Japan's industrial rise, this was a very common problem in hotels where Japanese business travellers stayed. Nowadays, the squatting-style toilets are dying out in Japan, being replaced by high-tech western-style ones that have more buttons than an airplane cockpit.

Where's the button to fire the intense stream of glorified water to properly clean the crusty brown remnants of peanuts and corn from my anus? I must know!

I actually wonder how many people mistook a bedet for a water fountain.

And I guess that's why I find so many foreigners taking a dump in my sink.

Addison:

MD:

Some people try to squat over the toilets to avoid touching the seat with their bare skin. You know, public toilets tend to get dirty over time.
The problem is that often the toilet will break and hurt the squatter. I saw some pictures at a safety training here... one guy almost severed his leg off.

^ TRWTF

This made me laugh MUCH more than the original story. Wow. How do you even manage that?

I call bull - don't think you'd put much more weight on a toilet by squatting on it than sitting. Experiment for later - put your feet on some scales next time & see how many kgs it takes off your total. Imagine it is well within factor of safety.
Also don't imagine you're much more likely to slip off than you would sitting.....

What if you took a 200kg poo?

Pedant:

I call bull - don't think you'd put much more weight on a toilet by squatting on it than sitting. Experiment for later - put your feet on some scales next time & see how many kgs it takes off your total. Imagine it is well within factor of safety.
Also don't imagine you're much more likely to slip off than you would sitting.....

It's not the weight that changes, it's the weight distribution. Most people's asses provide a rather nice weight distributor, whereas feet concentrate the weight in a smaller area, so higher pressure. Sure, it wouldn't be a problem with most quality toilet seats, but we're talking about public toilets here.

Similarly, the butt (in most cases) prevents falling through the hole in a toilet seat; the feet and legs aren't as lucky.

I call bull - don't think you'd put much more weight on a toilet by squatting on it than sitting. Experiment for later - put your feet on some scales next time & see how many kgs it takes off your total. Imagine it is well within factor of safety.
Also don't imagine you're much more likely to slip off than you would sitting.....

You're forgetting that when sitting part of the weight is redistributed through feet onto the floor, rather than resting fully on the toilet itself.

Pedant:

I call bull - don't think you'd put much more weight on a toilet by squatting on it than sitting. Experiment for later - put your feet on some scales next time & see how many kgs it takes off your total. Imagine it is well within factor of safety.
Also don't imagine you're much more likely to slip off than you would sitting.....

If you're sitting, the weight is acting pretty much straight down, so the seat just rests on the bowl. If you're squatting, I suppose you could wobble, which would make the force act sideways. This could move the toilet seat enough sideways so that one side isn't resting on the bowl, so it tips and/or breaks, and off you fall.

Toilet seat fittings can often move laterally if force is applied parallel to the floor when the fittings have loosened a bit.

Asshurts:

brazzy:

Anon:

For the toilet one, don't a lot of Asian countries have basically holes in the ground that you squat over? In that case the instruction might be necessary to stop people from falling in the regular western-style toilet.

It's not that they don't understand how to use a western toilet - it's that they're not used to the idea of physically touching their butt to an object that has been in contact with hundreds of other people's butts during the process of defecation. To some, this is so disgusting that they can't bring themselves to do it.

In the early days of Japan's industrial rise, this was a very common problem in hotels where Japanese business travellers stayed. Nowadays, the squatting-style toilets are dying out in Japan, being replaced by high-tech western-style ones that have more buttons than an airplane cockpit.

Where's the button to fire the intense stream of glorified water to properly clean the crusty brown remnants of peanuts and corn from my anus? I must know!

I actually wonder how many people mistook a bedet for a water fountain.

And I guess that's why I find so many foreigners taking a dump in my sink.

Pray, enlighten us - exactly how many foreigners have you actually found taking a dump in your sink?
And whilst we're on the subject maybe you ought to get a new hobby or fix an internal lock on your bathroom door, before all of these poor squatting foreigners think that your nation is full of perverts who like to watch each other taking a dump.

pscs:

Pedant:

I call bull - don't think you'd put much more weight on a toilet by squatting on it than sitting. Experiment for later - put your feet on some scales next time & see how many kgs it takes off your total. Imagine it is well within factor of safety.
Also don't imagine you're much more likely to slip off than you would sitting.....

If you're sitting, the weight is acting pretty much straight down, so the seat just rests on the bowl. If you're squatting, I suppose you could wobble, which would make the force act sideways. This could move the toilet seat enough sideways so that one side isn't resting on the bowl, so it tips and/or breaks, and off you fall.

Toilet seat fittings can often move laterally if force is applied parallel to the floor when the fittings have loosened a bit.

Sure, but I'm not sure that a toilet that could happily take an overweight westerner would struggly under most users. I'll google for incidents when I get home :)

And to think that the other techs I worked with in desktop support used to laugh at me when I brought my own keyboard to a service call :)

This one was lame, you see it on houses all the time. The door is placed for the possibility of a deck addition in the future. The only WTF is that ususally you'll see a gardrail tacked over the door for obvious safety reasons.

Though the crazy angle on the door was sorta cool.

Anonymous Coward:

This one was lame, you see it on houses all the time. The door is placed for the possibility of a deck addition in the future. The only WTF is that ususally you'll see a gardrail tacked over the door for obvious safety reasons.

Though the crazy angle on the door was sorta cool.

Cursed 'quote' button, being all close to the 'reply' button. That was meant to be in reply to 246388

"So I'm sure this does a good job at keeping the robbers out," wrote Stephen Prendergast, "now how do they get in?"

Why should they care how the robbers get in? In all honesty, though, this picture would be more effective if the taker had shifted a few steps to the left so the side door were not clearly visible.

MD:

Some people try to squat over the toilets to avoid touching the seat with their bare skin. You know, public toilets tend to get dirty over time.
The problem is that often the toilet will break and hurt the squatter. I saw some pictures at a safety training here... one guy almost severed his leg off.

I'm in tears trying not to laugh - I'm in an open plan office.

"So, how did you lose your leg?"
"Well, I was trying to have a shit without touching the seat and..." (Sorry, I can't write this at the moment, I'm really wanting to laugh out loud)

Skizz

Stilgar:

I wonder how did he press enter. Most keyboards are really dirty if you look under the keys but it is strange that the key is dirty where it is supposed to be pressed. Isn't whatever this is supposed to be scrubbed when the key is constantly pressed?

Aside from those built into laptops, keyboards generally have another Enter key. I bet it's not nearly as dirty.

Okay, I clicked on every one of the ads. I've done this every time you've posted all these ads. I'm a good guy, a friend of TheDailyWTF. I want to see you grow and prosper. So why haven't you printed a single one of the countless submissions I've made? Do you know who I am, or am I just another beguiled sucker among those who think you really do consider our submissions instead of making up your own?

Whatever...

Retelling a true (!!!!) story I've told before... when I was working my way through college as a grocery stocker, I saw a sale poster created by one of the "vice-managers". It was advertizing a brand of jelly in different flavors. The "vice-manager" had built a display at the end of an aisle, and advertized it with a sign that said, "Ass Jelly $1.49 each".

RE: Squatting. It's not just about not touching the seat. Squatting is a more natural position for elimination. If you're having trouble...getting things done...sometime, try it. It aligns things better and makes bowel movements come more easily. It's the position the body is *supposed* to be in for that activity. Western toilets are, frankly, a lousy design.

Re: The house with the door halfway up. My house would look funny without the porch on the front too. I'm guessing this house is supposed to have a deck or porch which has not been built yet or has been torn down and not reconstructed.

Nougat:

What if you took a 200kg poo?

I going to question that, but then I thought of the Chavs I've seen. I wonder if it just comes out as one large MaccyDs burger?

Wow! This thread is shitty.

Nodody:

RE: Squatting. It's not just about not touching the seat. Squatting is a more natural position for elimination. If you're having trouble...getting things done...sometime, try it. It aligns things better and makes bowel movements come more easily. It's the position the body is *supposed* to be in for that activity. Western toilets are, frankly, a lousy design.

Yes, but here in the western world, we're interested in things like cleanliness. We'd rather grunt a little harder and struggle a little longer, than be sitting in our excrement. Nor do we wipe with our left hand; we have things like bidets and toilet paper over here, to keep our fingers clean.

Kim:

Our house has a door like that. Part of it used to be a barn and apparently they needed the door to get the hay out or something. How do you get in? Through the door on the ground floor of course! Or with a ladder in case you forgot the key to the normal door. ;-)

To remove hay? Really? You had to know the "were you born in a barn" comments would be far to hard to resist.

frost:

The second-story door is common in the Michigan upper peninsula. It's for when you have 8 feet of snow.

As another Michigan resident: I had a real scare today. I was walking around outside when I suddenly realized that I couldn't see my breath! I tried to breathe in and out, but ... no fog in the air. I thought I must be suffocating or something. I called the doctor, and he told me that because of global warming, temperatures in Michigan have now climbed so high that your breath will no longer condense instantly. Wow!

My parents used to ask me to fix problems with a PC my sister gave them. Then I put some nasty fungus on their keyboard and they no longer call me for computer support. Long live fungi!

Nougat:

What if you took a 200kg poo?

It would depend on the force of ejection and the density of the fecal matter.

Let's assume that you've struck gold, and your poo is a nice, compact lump (I'll leave further conjecture as to the content of the mass as an intellectual exercise for the reader). The anus and the rectum are fairly elastic. Further, the more you stretch them, the happier they are to return to their neutral position. Therefore, in all likelihood, the expulsion of a 200 kg turd would result in the subject being propelled into the air and over the wall of the cubicle.

Code Dependent:

We'd rather grunt a little harder and struggle a little longer, than be sitting in our excrement.

That comment is the real wtf?

The toilet sign in not a WTF. Go to asian countries and experiment with their 'Squat' toilets, then you'll understand. Asians actually prefer squat toilets over 'western' ones (you don't sit in everybody's germs/other things), so I am not surprised at the sign. Someone could have the idea of squatting on the seat.

Pedant:

Code Dependent:

We'd rather grunt a little harder and struggle a little longer, than be sitting in our excrement.

That comment is the real wtf?

Are you asking, or telling?