• (cs) in reply to IAmAGoodProgrammer
    IAmAGoodProgrammer:
    The toilet sign in not a WTF. Go to asian countries and experiment with their 'Squat' toilets, then you'll understand. Asians actually prefer squat toilets over 'western' ones (you don't sit in everybody's germs/other things), so I am not surprised at the sign. Someone could have the idea of squatting on the seat.

    See, I can understand skimming the comments, maybe missing a point or two, but how did you not see the 500 line conversation where users discussed, in horrifying detail, the pros and cons of squat toilets?!

  • Anonymous Coward (unregistered) in reply to Code Dependent
    Code Dependent:
    Pedant:
    Code Dependent:
    We'd rather grunt a little harder and struggle a little longer, than be sitting in our excrement.
    That comment is the real wtf?
    Are you asking, or telling?
    Yes.
  • IDon'tReadTheCommentsBeforeIPost (unregistered) in reply to IAmAGoodProgrammer
    IAmAGoodProgrammer:
    The toilet sign in not a WTF. Go to asian countries and experiment with their 'Squat' toilets, then you'll understand. Asians actually prefer squat toilets over 'western' ones (you don't sit in everybody's germs/other things), so I am not surprised at the sign. Someone could have the idea of squatting on the seat.

    And who wants to dangle their legs like that when they poop, anyway? The nerves get all pinched and your legs get numb.

  • Wheelchair racing anybody? (unregistered)

    That final one looks like a wheelchair racing ahead sign. Where can we wager on this?

  • (cs) in reply to Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward:
    Code Dependent:
    Pedant:
    Code Dependent:
    We'd rather grunt a little harder and struggle a little longer, than be sitting in our excrement.
    That comment is the real wtf?
    Are you asking, or telling?
    Yes.
    Shit on your heels, then. I don't mind.
  • (cs)

    Who says the toilet squat sign is for the sake of the person ... squatting? (yes, various cultural reasons for squatting being normal aside) I had an amusing conversation once with someone who had done a stint cleaning public western style washrooms frequented by tourists from "squatter" countries; if you squat on the seat your propensity to get piss and crap all over the bathroom floor is much higher. Not a fun job. I mean its one thing to clean a really dirty toilet, but its above and beyond for housekeeping to clean toilet matter outside the bowl.

  • (cs) in reply to Andy Goth
    Andy Goth:
    Alan:
    I once saw a specials board in a cafe with "Ass. Cakes, Butt. Scones" written on it.
    One time at a restaurant I ordered the small shrimp cocktail, and on the receipt they wrote "Sm. Cock". Boo!

    I once ordered an English muffin and on the recept it said "English muff"

  • IDon'tReadTheCommentsBeforeIPost (unregistered) in reply to Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward:
    Code Dependent:
    Pedant:
    Code Dependent:
    We'd rather grunt a little harder and struggle a little longer, than be sitting in our excrement.
    That comment is the real wtf?
    Are you asking, or telling?
    Yes.

    A common mistake on these boards, forgetting the XOR.

  • (cs) in reply to bryan986
    bryan986:
    I once ordered an English muffin and on the recept it said "English muff"
    He said "you ain't seen nothin' till you're down on a muff And then you're sure to be a-changin' your ways"

    Can we all acknowledge that the lyrics are not the ever-popular and ever-misunderstood "down on a muffin"?

  • paulains (unregistered) in reply to Code Dependent
    Code Dependent:
    bryan986:
    I once ordered an English muffin and on the recept it said "English muff"
    He said "you ain't seen nothin' till you're down on a muff And then you're sure to be a-changin' your ways"

    Can we all acknowledge that the lyrics are not the ever-popular and ever-misunderstood "down on a muffin"?

    Mmm, muffins.

  • (cs) in reply to paulains
    paulains:
    Mmm, muffins.
    Mmm... muffs.
  • (cs) in reply to lolwtf
    lolwtf:
    ...You're supposed to press it with your finger.
    That's what I told my proctologist!
  • (cs) in reply to DaveK
    DaveK:
    That's what I told my proctologist!
    We fingered you would.
  • IT Girl (unregistered) in reply to Jay
    Jay:
    frost:
    The second-story door is common in the Michigan upper peninsula. It's for when you have 8 feet of snow.

    As another Michigan resident: I had a real scare today. I was walking around outside when I suddenly realized that I couldn't see my breath! I tried to breathe in and out, but ... no fog in the air. I thought I must be suffocating or something. I called the doctor, and he told me that because of global warming, temperatures in Michigan have now climbed so high that your breath will no longer condense instantly. Wow!

    Okay either frost is from some part of Michigan I've never seen or s/he's full of it. I've never seen 8 feet of snow in Michigan, unless you're using a backhoe to pile it up.

    Now Jay, that's funny!

  • (cs) in reply to frost
    frost:
    The second-story door is commin in da UP. It's fer when ya have 8 foot of snow.
    Fixed it for ya...
  • Bush (unregistered) in reply to Andy Goth
    Andy Goth:
    Alan:
    I once saw a specials board in a cafe with "Ass. Cakes, Butt. Scones" written on it.
    One time at a restaurant I ordered the small shrimp cocktail, and on the receipt they wrote "Sm. Cock". Boo!

    Am I the only one that doesn't get this one? Doesn't cock usually mean chicken?

  • (cs) in reply to Bush
    Bush:
    Andy Goth:
    Alan:
    I once saw a specials board in a cafe with "Ass. Cakes, Butt. Scones" written on it.
    One time at a restaurant I ordered the small shrimp cocktail, and on the receipt they wrote "Sm. Cock". Boo!
    Am I the only one that doesn't get this one? Doesn't cock usually mean chicken?
    SMACK!!! (Bush cold-cocked)
  • (cs) in reply to IDon'tReadTheCommentsBeforeIPost
    IDon'tReadTheCommentsBeforeIPost:
    A common mistake on these boards, forgetting the XOR.
    That's a good one. Let's keep this in for a running joke.

    "So what is it, the one xor the other?"

    Yeah, that'll work. Brillant!

  • Ken (unregistered)

    Could we get a picture of the ENTIRE keyboard??? I've been laughing hysterically slash totally disgusted by it!

  • Stychokiller (unregistered) in reply to Buddy
    Buddy:
    Someone You Know:
    St Mary's Hospital for the Infected Keys:
    The Enter key looks like it has mold on it...

    ...any other bets?

    My bet is on dried Ass Sauce (shudder!) :)) That looks like a Scandinavian keyboard, so I suppose maybe it's Wasabröd crumbs. I hope.

    Looks like congealed grease and dust. You get the same thing in kitchen vents. Hard to clean but still inexcusable.

  • (cs) in reply to Jay
    Jay:
    As another Michigan resident: I had a real scare today. I was walking around outside when I suddenly realized that I couldn't see my breath! I tried to breathe in and out, but ... no fog in the air. I thought I must be suffocating or something. I called the doctor, and he told me that because of global warming, temperatures in Michigan have now climbed so high that your breath will no longer condense instantly. Wow!
    As a Michigander living in a strange place called "The South" where we have had exactly one inch of snow this winter, your post makes me feel all homesick. I had forgotten about the joys of breathing "smoke", freeze dried hair, and not seeing either the grass or the sun for three months straight.
  • Anon (unregistered)

    Perhaps the previous user had made the mistake of squatting over the keyboard. See, that's why we need signs.

  • Nougat (unregistered) in reply to IDon'tReadTheCommentsBeforeIPost
    IDon'tReadTheCommentsBeforeIPost:
    IAmAGoodProgrammer:
    The toilet sign in not a WTF. Go to asian countries and experiment with their 'Squat' toilets, then you'll understand. Asians actually prefer squat toilets over 'western' ones (you don't sit in everybody's germs/other things), so I am not surprised at the sign. Someone could have the idea of squatting on the seat.

    And who wants to dangle their legs like that when they poop, anyway? The nerves get all pinched and your legs get numb.

    According to the book, "What's Your Poo Telling You?", squatting makes the defecator focus more on the squatting more than the actual pooping thus making the pooper work harder to eject that frothy brown trout from your rear pucker.

  • Calli Arcale (unregistered) in reply to JoJo
    JoJo:
    Lots of countries use squat toilets. In fact, you can even buy squatting shelves now for standard toilets as it's been shown to be a much more healthy way to poop than sitting on a toilet. Gravity does a lot of the work for you and you're using your muscles in a more natural way. Sit-down toilets are a relatively recent invention after all, and not one we've evolved to use. :-)

    Well, if "relatively recent" means "at least 2,000 years ago". The Romans actually used sit-down toilets, and even had public restrooms lined with them. No privacy cubicles, and the 'flush" consisted of a steady stream of aquaduct water underneath the whole facility, but otherwise, something modern Westerners would instantly recognize as a place to sit down and do one's business.

    To those wondering how you can get hurt squatting on a Western-style toilet, the main danger isn't the increased weight of the legs. It's the risk of falling off and/or in, as the "footholds" are pretty precarious. When you fall, you could exert a significant lateral force on the stool, potentially snapping it right over and causing it to fall, especially in a public restroom which gets very heavy use and isn't well maintained. How could you almost lose a leg? Several possibilities present themselves, though they're all freak accidents. For instance, a large shard of porcelain might cut the leg very deeply, especially if this is combined with a severe leg fracture. While it probably won't whack the leg off immediately, it could do enough damage that doctors are unable to save the limb and have to amputate. Another possibility is if you get a nasty infection -- a deep wound contaminated with anaerobic gut bacteria, courtesy of your own fresh stool. A sufficiently bad infection could also lead to amputation.

  • Calli Arcale (unregistered) in reply to Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward:
    This one was lame, you see it on houses all the time. The door is placed for the possibility of a deck addition in the future. The only WTF is that ususally you'll see a gardrail tacked over the door for obvious safety reasons.

    Terrifyingly enough, while I've seen countless houses with doors (usually sliding glass doors but occasionally French doors) opening onto a twelve-foot drop because the deck hasn't been built yet, I have never seen one with a guardrail installed over it. This includes houses that have been occupied for twenty years without bothering to add that deck, and ones with small children.

  • (cs) in reply to Code Dependent
    Code Dependent:
    Yes, but here in the western world, we're interested in things like cleanliness. We'd rather grunt a little harder and struggle a little longer, than be sitting in our excrement.
    Use a squat toilet properly, and you won't be sitting in excrement. That only happens if you fall over like an idiot.
  • (cs)

    Persons under age 18 aren't allowed out of that door because it opens onto an 8 foot drop! Isn't it obvious? Adults can handle the jump, but kids have to go out the side door.

  • (cs) in reply to Code Dependent
    Code Dependent:
    Okay, I clicked on every one of the ads. I've done this every time you've posted all these ads. I'm a good guy, a friend of TheDailyWTF.

    I appreciate the support. But, just to clear... clicking on the ads just to click doesn't really help. It tends to make things even more difficult, as we run statics and what not.

    The best thing you can do for an ad-supported publication is to give the sponsors a "fair shake". I mean, obviously, if you're not a programmer, SlickEdit isn't for you... but, if you are, then give 'em a try. Same goes for the other sponsors.

    Code Dependent:
    Why haven't you printed a single one of the countless submissions I've made?

    There are a lot of submissions. A lot. I do read each and every one, but obviously only some of them get published.

    Email me again, or ask. Sometimes I don't get it. Sometimes I'm really tired and just misunderstand the point of the story. Who knows.

    I do my best to respond to submissions when someone asks me to - but, that's easy to miss, especially on the Error'd ones, since I fly through those (there are like 20-30 error'd submissions a day).

    But if you email me personally (on the contact form), I always reply. So, don't hestiate to email me.

  • paulains (unregistered) in reply to Nougat
    Nougat:
    IDon'tReadTheCommentsBeforeIPost:
    IAmAGoodProgrammer:
    The toilet sign in not a WTF. Go to asian countries and experiment with their 'Squat' toilets, then you'll understand. Asians actually prefer squat toilets over 'western' ones (you don't sit in everybody's germs/other things), so I am not surprised at the sign. Someone could have the idea of squatting on the seat.

    And who wants to dangle their legs like that when they poop, anyway? The nerves get all pinched and your legs get numb.

    According to the book, "What's Your Poo Telling You?", squatting makes the defecator focus more on the squatting more than the actual pooping thus making the pooper work harder to eject that frothy brown trout from your rear pucker.

    My poo tells me I smell all flowery.

  • (cs) in reply to Stychokiller
    Stychokiller:
    Buddy:
    Someone You Know:
    St Mary's Hospital for the Infected Keys:
    The Enter key looks like it has mold on it...

    ...any other bets?

    My bet is on dried Ass Sauce (shudder!) :)) That looks like a Scandinavian keyboard, so I suppose maybe it's Wasabröd crumbs. I hope.

    Looks like congealed grease and dust. You get the same thing in kitchen vents. Hard to clean but still inexcusable.

    Don't put your Ass Sauce words in my mouth.

  • Some Wonk (unregistered)

    That is just some board chow that guy was saving for later.

    http://www.inktank.com/category/comics/angst-technology/page/22/

  • IT Girl (unregistered) in reply to DaveK
    DaveK:
    brazzy:
    Anon:
    For the toilet one, don't a lot of Asian countries have basically holes in the ground that you squat over? In that case the instruction might be necessary to stop people from falling in the regular western-style toilet.
    It's not that they don't understand how to use a western toilet - it's that they're not used to the idea of physically touching their butt to an object that has been in contact with hundreds of other people's butts during the process of defecation. To some, this is so disgusting that they can't bring themselves to do it.
    Happens here too. I've known lots of girls who always use the toilets that way when they're in some really grimy squalid nightclub... and I've known some really grimy squalid nightclubs....

    Many of us do that in public washrooms (even the clean ones), but we don't actually stand on the toilet to do it. Unless you have remarkably short legs it is possible while standing on the ground. The problem is that it becomes next to impossible to keep from getting the seat wet (not so difficult to keep from defecating on it, I mean really guys), thereby perpetuating the uncleanliness of public toilets.

  • (cs) in reply to Someone You Know
    Someone You Know:
    Don't put your Ass Sauce words in my mouth.
    Keep your mouth shut.
  • (cs) in reply to Alex Papadimoulis
    Alex Papadimoulis:
    The best thing you can do for an ad-supported publication is to give the sponsors a "fair shake". I mean, obviously, if you're not a programmer, SlickEdit isn't for you... but, if you are, then give 'em a try.
    I'm a programmer (actually, I prefer the term "software developer"), but my tools are provided for me by my employer. We are a "Microsoft shop" (a term I didn't coin; don't look at me), and we are provided with the latest DotNet technology, Visual Studio version, and Windows OS. We're aware of the public perception and all the complaints and comparisons to Linux, blah blah blah, but when you receive an MSDN Premium subscription as part of your position, it's hard to complain. Or, to find a use for SlickEdit.
    Alex Papadimoulis:
    Code Dependent:
    Why haven't you printed a single one of the countless submissions I've made?
    There are a lot of submissions. A lot. I do read each and every one, but obviously only some of them get published.
    Don't worry about it; it's no big deal. Only, sometimes I see crap on here that sucks a lot worse than some Error'd submission I made, and I wonder about the requirements for acceptance. It isn't going to stop me from reading and posting, so don't sweat it.
  • (cs) in reply to Tam
    Tam:
    I believe it's a new species of yeast. Growing on the keyboard, it now has the ability to Read, and will soon consume our Earth.

    We have to nuke it from orbit.

    It's the only way to be sure!

  • JL (unregistered) in reply to bryan986
    bryan986:
    Andy Goth:
    Alan:
    I once saw a specials board in a cafe with "Ass. Cakes, Butt. Scones" written on it.
    One time at a restaurant I ordered the small shrimp cocktail, and on the receipt they wrote "Sm. Cock". Boo!

    I once ordered an English muffin and on the recept it said "English muff"

    Once when I bought homogenized milk, the receipt said "homo milk".

  • (cs) in reply to JL
    JL:
    Once when I bought homogenized milk, the receipt said "homo milk".
    I worked my way through college as a stocker at an IGA (Independent Grocer's Alliance). The milk came in boxes of either six gallons or twelve half-gallons, with the type and size stenciled on the outside of the box for identification.

    So, one day I was rolling a dolly full of milk out to stock the display, and I passed one of the assistant managers. I said, "Hey, man, come on, I've got a whole dolly full of LowFat gals" (gallons)

    And he said, "Yeah, but they've got big jugs!"

    Score!

  • (cs) in reply to Code Dependent
    Code Dependent:
    So, one day I was rolling a dolly full of milk out to stock the display, and I passed one of the assistant managers. I said, "Hey, man, come on, I've got a whole dolly full of LowFat gals" (gallons)

    And he said, "Yeah, but they've got big jugs!"

    Score!

    So he doesn't like gals with big jugs?

    Was he more of a homo milk kinda guy?

  • Pedant (unregistered) in reply to tezoatlipoca
    tezoatlipoca:
    Who says the toilet squat sign is for the sake of the person ... squatting? (yes, various cultural reasons for squatting being normal aside) I had an amusing conversation once with someone who had done a stint cleaning public western style washrooms frequented by tourists from "squatter" countries; if you squat on the seat your propensity to get piss and crap all over the bathroom floor is much higher. Not a fun job. I mean its one thing to clean a really dirty toilet, but its above and beyond for housekeeping to clean toilet matter outside the bowl.

    My work involves me working on site at various different professional companies. I've yet to work at one where there were clean toilets without the occasional piss on the floor :S

  • Mattwho (unregistered) in reply to Andy Goth
    Andy Goth:
    Alan:
    I once saw a specials board in a cafe with "Ass. Cakes, Butt. Scones" written on it.
    One time at a restaurant I ordered the small shrimp cocktail, and on the receipt they wrote "Sm. Cock". Boo!

    I once ordered a happy meal for my son and they asked if it was a boy or a girl.

    The reciept said Happy Meal w/nuts

  • (cs) in reply to Code Dependent

    I'm a programmer (actually, I prefer the term "software developer"), but my tools are provided for me by my employer. We are a "Microsoft shop" (a term I didn't coin; don't look at me), and we are provided with the latest DotNet technology, Visual Studio version, and Windows OS. We're aware of the public perception and all the complaints and comparisons to Linux, blah blah blah, but when you receive an MSDN Premium subscription as part of your position, it's hard to complain. Or, to find a use for SlickEdit.[/quote]

    I don't understand what being a Microsoft Shop, and having an MSDN Premium subscription has to do with anything? Many people like SlickEdit better than Visual Studio. You might be able to get your company to buy a copy for you.

  • IDon'tReadTheCommentsBeforeIPost (unregistered) in reply to chrismcb
    chrismcb:
    I don't understand what being a Microsoft Shop, and having an MSDN Premium subscription has to do with anything?

    Are you asking, xor telling?

  • PlunderBunny (unregistered)

    It's not that people from Asia don't know how to use a toilet seat - many toilets in Asia are the 'squat' type. Some Asian people prefer to go that way, so when they encounter a toilet with a seat, they 'squat' on it. I think the warning is because it's dangerous - if you slipped, you could do injure yourself badly, and then you'd be in the poo...

  • Thy logick betrays thee (unregistered) in reply to Pim
    Pim:
    IDon'tReadTheCommentsBeforeIPost:
    A common mistake on these boards, forgetting the XOR.
    That's a good one. Let's keep this in for a running joke.

    "So what is it, the one xor the other?"

    Yeah, that'll work. Brillant!

    Of course it'll work.

    "Yes."

  • Anon Cow (unregistered) in reply to Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward:
    The only WTF is that ususally you'll see a gardrail tacked over the door for obvious safety reasons.
    It's called a french balcony.
  • (cs) in reply to Alan
    Alan:
    I once saw a specials board in a cafe with...

    Ass. Cakes Butt. Scones

    ...written on it. Got tea all down my shirt when I saw it.

    I'm slightly surprised that they didn't offer

    Cock. Sauce

    and of course that perennial English favourite,

    Dick, Spotted

    (which is delicious with custard, btw)

  • blunden (unregistered) in reply to MD

    Interesting then that people's hands can often be dirtier than a normal public toilet seat.

  • Cra!g (unregistered)

    The house and car looks quite European. When I lived in Germany there were a lot of houses that were left permanently unfinished. I always understood this was for tax reasons. This looks like they may have a staircase "under construction" for some kind of loophole.

  • paulains (unregistered) in reply to Thy logick betrays thee
    Thy logick betrays thee:
    Pim:
    IDon'tReadTheCommentsBeforeIPost:
    A common mistake on these boards, forgetting the XOR.
    That's a good one. Let's keep this in for a running joke.

    "So what is it, the one xor the other?"

    Yeah, that'll work. Brillant!

    Of course it'll work.

    "Yes."

    Exactly. xor might be good for implying that a person should answer one way or the other and not both, but they can still just answer "Yes."

  • Milf (unregistered) in reply to Andy Goth
    Andy Goth:
    Alan:
    I once saw a specials board in a cafe with "Ass. Cakes, Butt. Scones" written on it.
    One time at a restaurant I ordered the small shrimp cocktail, and on the receipt they wrote "Sm. Cock". Boo!
    IMy mobile phone provider had to change the code for 'text message to external' on the bills from 'SMSEX' to something else ...

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