Comment On Unhelpful Help

"I came across a device on the network running on our old IP range," Landy Bible writes, "since we are still trying to migrate things, I decided to try and figure out what was. After running NMAP, I discovered that telnet was open. I opened up a telnet session hoping to find clues as to what the device was. Following is the output from that session." [expand full text]
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Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:05 • by admin (unregistered)
HELP

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:07 • by name_error (unregistered)
hmm, that last one doesn't seem so bad seeing as the choices aren't mutually exclusive (and you'd probably have to check both for it to actually delete anything)

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:08 • by P (unregistered)
235382 in reply to 235380
admin:
HELP


Please refer to your User Manual

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:09 • by ERROR (unregistered)
NOT_FOUND

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:10 • by snoofle
I'm confused. What if you're only somewhat sure and simply press delete without checking either box? Does it delete every third bit?

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:13 • by Andy Goth
My guess is that you have to check both boxes before it'll let you delete the account. Reminds me of a particularly odd deletion confirmation "dialog" I once encountered at work, where Delete was a cascading menu. In the submenu was only one item, "Are you sure?". Looked something like this:
+-(popup menu)-+

| Reposition |
| Waypoints |
| Tactics >|
| Radar >|+---------------+
| Delete >|| Are you sure? |
+--------------++---------------+
There was no actual confirmation dialog. Selecting "Are you sure?" would delete the object. Oh, and you're sadly mistaken if you think this is a right-click menu. I think it was a control-double middle click menu.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:14 • by CaRL (unregistered)
Yeah, the "I'm sure" "I'm really sure" checkboxes might seem like a good idea at first, but within 3 hours lusers will have trained themselves to blow right through them without thinking, much less reading. (It is so painful to think, and probably a violation of the Geneva Convention to ask someone to read...)

So, I propose the Delete Captcha: You are presented with a screen full of randomly scattered letters. You have to find, click and drag to a target the letters "D" "E" "L" "E" "T" "E" in order, then click your mouse ten times within two seconds or it makes you start over. And on the third try it locks your screen for a half hour.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:15 • by moneys (unregistered)
there's obviously a "save" missing from in front of that 49 cents

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:18 • by Scott (unregistered)
Oh noes, the user interface is sooooo confusing! I see a Delete button, but what if I change my mind? There's no Cancel!!! Oh crap I guess I'm doomed. Going to have to Delete, it's too late now...

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:19 • by NSCoder
235391 in reply to 235388
CaRL:
So, I propose the Delete Captcha: You are presented with a screen full of randomly scattered letters. You have to find, click and drag to a target the letters "D" "E" "L" "E" "T" "E" in order, then click your mouse ten times within two seconds or it makes you start over. And on the third try it locks your screen for a half hour.
And you have to get the right Es in the right places, not just use any old E as the second letter just because it looks the same as the one that's supposed to go there.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:42 • by akatherder
I like how the last WTF has a completely unintuitive interface that could easily lead you to believe you deleted a document, but it's still out there. Great interface for accidentally leaving confidential or outdated documents available.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:44 • by ATimson
235396 in reply to 235389
moneys:
there's obviously a "save" missing from in front of that 49 cents

Yep. It'd be a lot more WTF if that sign weren't likely made up by some poor sod at the store using Microsoft Word.

Not that I've had to do that many a time myself at a grocery store I worked at... :)

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:49 • by Voodoo Coder
235397 in reply to 235389
moneys:
there's obviously a "save" missing from in front of that 49 cents


Nice catch, Columbo.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:56 • by monkeyPushButton (unregistered)
235398 in reply to 235389
moneys:
there's obviously a "save" missing from in front of that 49 cents


Although a friend of mine once sold some magic cards through our local game store. Priced them at 6 for $1 or 15 cents each. People would pre-sort them into piles of six to make sure to get the "discount". Was three months before one customer brought his cards up and asked to pay the individual price. At which point the special pricing came into play; friend said to give for free to first person who could do math.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 08:57 • by shadowman
235399 in reply to 235388
CaRL:
Yeah, the "I'm sure" "I'm really sure" checkboxes might seem like a good idea at first, but within 3 hours lusers will have trained themselves to blow right through them without thinking, much less reading. (It is so painful to think, and probably a violation of the Geneva Convention to ask someone to read...)

So, I propose the Delete Captcha: You are presented with a screen full of randomly scattered letters. You have to find, click and drag to a target the letters "D" "E" "L" "E" "T" "E" in order, then click your mouse ten times within two seconds or it makes you start over. And on the third try it locks your screen for a half hour.


At least there'd be a good excuse as to why we hardly got any work done.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 09:00 • by Permanganate (unregistered)
Is it just me, or does the last line of the Circuit City sales tag for the PSP bundle read "Superbad UMD Movie"? That could be any of them. it should be more specific.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 09:15 • by mauhiz (unregistered)
Enter username, or HELP> HELP
Enter username, or help> help
Enter username, or HELP> help
Nice try, ASSHOLE>

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 09:22 • by Hairy Mary (unregistered)
Welcome to TDWTF Forums enter comment, or HELP> help

Welcome to TDWTF Forums enter comment, or HELP> HELP

Welcome to TDWTF Forums enter comment or HELP> FIST!!!!

Please fill out CAPTCHA

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 09:23 • by Denis (unregistered)
Sorry, but the last one is not WTF at all. It's not a choice (note they're checkboxes, not radio buttons), and it just provides an additional protection against someone deleting something off the repository.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 09:29 • by bryan986
What they don't tell you is selecting "I'm sure" just results in another confirmation screen with only one option, "I'm really sure".

Selecting both boxes at the same time not only deletes the file, but also prints it out and feeds into a shredder for extra security.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 09:36 • by jspenguin
The Real WTF(TM) is that there is no admin password on the print server.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 09:37 • by TopCod3r
It is a print server, so what kind of help did you expect? And why would I as a programmer provide online help to someone using a hacking program like telnet to reach my program? This is one of the first things you learn how to do in any security course, security by obscurity.

But I don't write those kinds of programs anymore. Now I mostly work on internal business applications, but still my programs never need a help option on the menu. It has always been my contention that if you need to provide a help file then you have failed as a user interface designer. What little instructions that I do need to provide, I just write them in a label and put the label on the form.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 09:42 • by Anonymous (unregistered)
235409 in reply to 235408
TopCod3r:
It is a print server, so what kind of help did you expect? And why would I as a programmer provide online help to someone using a hacking program like telnet to reach my program? This is one of the first things you learn how to do in any security course, security by obscurity.

But I don't write those kinds of programs anymore. Now I mostly work on internal business applications, but still my programs never need a help option on the menu. It has always been my contention that if you need to provide a help file then you have failed as a user interface designer. What little instructions that I do need to provide, I just write them in a label and put the label on the form.
Hi TC. Since we're being absolutely serious here, I write all user documentation in ToolTips. I can then put the whole 'user manual' right there on the form, to be displayed whenever the user moves their mouse over a control. Instant user manual, you don't even need to hit F1.

But seriously...

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 09:42 • by campkev
235410 in reply to 235402
Enter username, or HELP> help
Enter username, or help> HELP
Enter username, or HELP> admin
Enter username, or HELP> username, or HELP
'Bout time. You're kinda slow, aren't you? What do you want to do now?>

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 09:57 • by revenant (unregistered)
Poor IBM Network Card was yelling for help, and the insensitive user only mocked it. Obviously, it didn't mean that 'help' is a command to enter. It meant 'Either type in a username or HELP me.'

It's no surprise that when the user wanted help later (from 'Server>' prompt), the device didn't want to aid one who was so cruel to it earlier, and only politely sent him to RTFM.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 09:57 • by Yoda (unregistered)
Saw this in Google Reader, I did. The right picture, I think not.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 09:58 • by JimM
235417 in reply to 235409
Anonymous:
TopCod3r:
It is a print server, so what kind of help did you expect? And why would I as a programmer provide online help to someone using a hacking program like telnet to reach my program? This is one of the first things you learn how to do in any security course, security by obscurity.

But I don't write those kinds of programs anymore. Now I mostly work on internal business applications, but still my programs never need a help option on the menu. It has always been my contention that if you need to provide a help file then you have failed as a user interface designer. What little instructions that I do need to provide, I just write them in a label and put the label on the form.
Hi TC. Since we're being absolutely serious here, I write all user documentation in ToolTips. I can then put the whole 'user manual' right there on the form, to be displayed whenever the user moves their mouse over a control. Instant user manual, you don't even need to hit F1.

But seriously...
While this rates fairly low on mylist of Top TC comments, I've highlighted one bit I actually kind of agree with. A good UI should be sufficiently intuitive that 99% of tasks can be carried out without RTFM. As much as it pains me to say this, it's actually something Microsoft have got rather good at (excepting Office 2007 of course, which I found almost impossible to use without regular referal to the help - or is that just me?)...

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 10:00 • by Voodoo Coder
235418 in reply to 235409
Anonymous:
TopCod3r:
It is a print server, so what kind of help did you expect? And why would I as a programmer provide online help to someone using a hacking program like telnet to reach my program? This is one of the first things you learn how to do in any security course, security by obscurity.

But I don't write those kinds of programs anymore. Now I mostly work on internal business applications, but still my programs never need a help option on the menu. It has always been my contention that if you need to provide a help file then you have failed as a user interface designer. What little instructions that I do need to provide, I just write them in a label and put the label on the form.
Hi TC. Since we're being absolutely serious here, I write all user documentation in ToolTips. I can then put the whole 'user manual' right there on the form, to be displayed whenever the user moves their mouse over a control. Instant user manual, you don't even need to hit F1.

But seriously...


Nevermind all of that...I just write Big Red Button programs. The interface consists of a single, gigantic flashing red button. Press it, and it does whatever it's supposed to do.

Never any errors, never any questions, never any help files. Just push this big red button.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 10:10 • by Voodoo Coder
235420 in reply to 235417
JimM:
Anonymous:
TopCod3r:
It is a print server, so what kind of help did you expect? And why would I as a programmer provide online help to someone using a hacking program like telnet to reach my program? This is one of the first things you learn how to do in any security course, security by obscurity.

But I don't write those kinds of programs anymore. Now I mostly work on internal business applications, but still my programs never need a help option on the menu. It has always been my contention that if you need to provide a help file then you have failed as a user interface designer. What little instructions that I do need to provide, I just write them in a label and put the label on the form.
Hi TC. Since we're being absolutely serious here, I write all user documentation in ToolTips. I can then put the whole 'user manual' right there on the form, to be displayed whenever the user moves their mouse over a control. Instant user manual, you don't even need to hit F1.

But seriously...
While this rates fairly low on mylist of Top TC comments, I've highlighted one bit I actually kind of agree with. A good UI should be sufficiently intuitive that 99% of tasks can be carried out without RTFM. As much as it pains me to say this, it's actually something Microsoft have got rather good at (excepting Office 2007 of course, which I found almost impossible to use without regular referal to the help - or is that just me?)...


Yeah, the Office 07 interface is one that you either find incredibly intuitive (me), or you get lost in..and the division is pretty even.

A help file is not useless though. It bridges the gap between a feature rich, robust application and a mildly retarded user. You want a feature rich application that is so intuitive that it doesn't need a help manual? OK...go download AOL Desktop.

Did the programmers of that train wreck do it right? I mean, sure, a monkey with spike sticking out of its forehead could probably navigate the internet with it. It's designed with that specific user in mind. Problem is, the program flows like a river of mud, offers zero freedom to the user, and takes advantage of the user's ignorance to push proprietary garbage.

Help files aren't something that you can do without. The most useful applications out there not only require a help file, but also an accompanying book or two to train you on them (Look at Photoshop, for example).

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 10:13 • by Dirk Diggler (unregistered)
235421 in reply to 235409
Anonymous:
TopCod3r:
It is a print server, so what kind of help did you expect? And why would I as a programmer provide online help to someone using a hacking program like telnet to reach my program? This is one of the first things you learn how to do in any security course, security by obscurity.

But I don't write those kinds of programs anymore. Now I mostly work on internal business applications, but still my programs never need a help option on the menu. It has always been my contention that if you need to provide a help file then you have failed as a user interface designer. What little instructions that I do need to provide, I just write them in a label and put the label on the form.
Hi TC. Since we're being absolutely serious here, I write all user documentation in ToolTips. I can then put the whole 'user manual' right there on the form, to be displayed whenever the user moves their mouse over a control. Instant user manual, you don't even need to hit F1.

But seriously...
I hate those tool tips. I often use the mouse as pointer and those freaking tool tips pop up and block whatever I'm trying to read.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 10:29 • by Hairy Mary (unregistered)
235423 in reply to 235421
Dirk Diggler:
Anonymous:
Hi TC. Since we're being absolutely serious here, I write all user documentation in ToolTips. I can then put the whole 'user manual' right there on the form, to be displayed whenever the user moves their mouse over a control. Instant user manual, you don't even need to hit F1.

But seriously...
I hate those tool tips. I often use the mouse as pointer and those freaking tool tips pop up and block whatever I'm trying to read.

That's why you should disable the tooltip after the first time it's displayed.

That way you get the information to the user in the RIGHT PLACE (when the cursor is on it) at the RIGHT TIME (when they are looking at it). No lousy helpLESS files, no pressing F1, no dumb tooltips every time you move your mouse. Document everything clearly, where needed, once.

Repeatedly showing the tip each and every time after that is just insulting the intelligence of your users... "Haha you're so dumb I have to keep telling you this stuff." Respect your users and do these things properly.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 10:35 • by silent d (unregistered)
235425 in reply to 235418
But can the users resist pressing the big, shiny red button?

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1153869/history_eraser_button_ren_and_stimpy/

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 10:36 • by fennec
235427 in reply to 235423
Hairy Mary:
Dirk Diggler:
Anonymous:
Hi TC. Since we're being absolutely serious here, I write all user documentation in ToolTips. I can then put the whole 'user manual' right there on the form, to be displayed whenever the user moves their mouse over a control. Instant user manual, you don't even need to hit F1.

But seriously...
I hate those tool tips. I often use the mouse as pointer and those freaking tool tips pop up and block whatever I'm trying to read.

That's why you should disable the tooltip after the first time it's displayed.

That way you get the information to the user in the RIGHT PLACE (when the cursor is on it) at the RIGHT TIME (when they are looking at it). No lousy helpLESS files, no pressing F1, no dumb tooltips every time you move your mouse. Document everything clearly, where needed, once.

Repeatedly showing the tip each and every time after that is just insulting the intelligence of your users... "Haha you're so dumb I have to keep telling you this stuff." Respect your users and do these things properly.


Ugh! I hate it when I get a useful tooltip, but I moved my mouse at the wrong moment and it went away and I can't get it to come back! Blaargh!

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 10:38 • by B4dCod3r (unregistered)
235428 in reply to 235408
Uuhu... you're so good...

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 10:57 • by Tom Reingold (unregistered)
If there were such a thing as a WAN card, how would it differ from a LAN card?

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 11:06 • by Ian (unregistered)
235434 in reply to 235430
Tom Reingold:
If there were such a thing as a WAN card, how would it differ from a LAN card?
It would be wider.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 11:23 • by Smash King
235442 in reply to 235430
Tom Reingold:
If there were such a thing as a WAN card, how would it differ from a LAN card?
There are entrances for a few thousand RJ45 plugs on it.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 11:24 • by WhiskeyJack
235443 in reply to 235434
Ian:
It would be wider.


I see what you did there.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 11:26 • by wklink (unregistered)
235445 in reply to 235380
Enter username, or HELP> HELP GAMES
"GAMES" REFERS TO MODELS, SIMULATIONS AND GAMES
WHICH HAVE TACTICAL AND STRATEGIC APPLICATIONS.

Enter username, or HELP> LIST GAMES
FALKEN'S MAZE
BLACK JACK
GIN RUMMY
HEARTS
BRIDGE
CHECKERS
CHESS
POKER
FIGHTER COMBAT
GUERRILLA ENGAGEMENT
DESERT WARFARE
AIR-TO-GROUND ACTIONS
THEATREWIDE TACTICAL WARFARE
THEATREWIDE BIOTOXIC AND CHEMICAL WARFARE

GLOBAL THERMONUCLEAR WAR

Enter username, or HELP>

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 11:28 • by NSCoder
235448 in reply to 235430
Tom Reingold:
If there were such a thing as a WAN card, how would it differ from a LAN card?
It would exploit quantum nonlocality.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 11:37 • by ATimson
235453 in reply to 235430
Tom Reingold:
If there were such a thing as a WAN card, how would it differ from a LAN card?

It would offer you Internet access on a desktop or laptop via a cell phone provider.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 11:41 • by Lummox (unregistered)
The Circuit City one is understandable actually. I used to work at Staples and any item that's not supposed to go on sale before a certain date is marked as $9999.99 because that's the highest price the system accepts for a single item. Just a preventative step so that the item could go live in the inventory and they could just schedule a price change since technically you're not supposed to keep the item/sku out of inventory if you have it on hand. It was a definite glitch though that it recognized it as a price drop.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 11:46 • by operagost
235458 in reply to 235387
Andy Goth:
My guess is that you have to check both boxes before it'll let you delete the account. Reminds me of a particularly odd deletion confirmation "dialog" I once encountered at work, where Delete was a cascading menu. In the submenu was only one item, "Are you sure?". Looked something like this:
+-(popup menu)-+

| Reposition |
| Waypoints |
| Tactics >|
| Radar >|+---------------+
| Delete >|| Are you sure? |
+--------------++---------------+
There was no actual confirmation dialog. Selecting "Are you sure?" would delete the object. Oh, and you're sadly mistaken if you think this is a right-click menu. I think it was a control-double middle click menu.

The NES game Tecmo Super Bowl, when asked to reset the season, would prompt "Are you sure?" Upon answering yes, the next dialog was, "Really?"

Fortunately, that was as far as it went.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 12:00 • by jcs (unregistered)
James Johnston: The Thinkpad antennas are usually mounted at the top of the screen, so in secondary landscape mode, the antenna would be pressing against the user's body, which would either disrupt the reception or result in dangerous levels of RF entering the body.

I'm not surprised that the message appears at such an inappropriate time. Thinkpad hardware is great, but the drivers and "helper" programs suck big time. Uninstall the "Lenovo helper programs" and you'll be a happier man.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 12:16 • by Technical Thug
235469 in reply to 235445
wklink:
Enter username, or HELP> HELP GAMES
"GAMES" REFERS TO MODELS, SIMULATIONS AND GAMES
WHICH HAVE TACTICAL AND STRATEGIC APPLICATIONS.

Enter username, or HELP> LIST GAMES
FALKEN'S MAZE
BLACK JACK
GIN RUMMY
HEARTS
BRIDGE
CHECKERS
CHESS
POKER
FIGHTER COMBAT
GUERRILLA ENGAGEMENT
DESERT WARFARE
AIR-TO-GROUND ACTIONS
THEATREWIDE TACTICAL WARFARE
THEATREWIDE BIOTOXIC AND CHEMICAL WARFARE

GLOBAL THERMONUCLEAR WAR

Enter username, or HELP>
TIC TAC TOE

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 12:22 • by Anonymous (unregistered)
235473 in reply to 235463
jcs:
James Johnston: The Thinkpad antennas are usually mounted at the top of the screen, so in secondary landscape mode, the antenna would be pressing against the user's body, which would either disrupt the reception or result in dangerous levels of RF entering the body.
Wha...? Oh wait, this is a troll. Sorry, I get it now. Dangerous levels of RF indeed - if that were true, mobile phones would have killed us all by now. It is common knowledge that mobiles produce way higher RF levels than WLAN cards - and you hold a mobile right next to your head!! Still, I get it, you're joking, thanks!

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 12:26 • by nonpartisan (unregistered)
235476 in reply to 235420
Voodoo Coder:
Yeah, the Office 07 interface is one that you either find incredibly intuitive (me), or you get lost in..and the division is pretty even.

A help file is not useless though. It bridges the gap between a feature rich, robust application and a mildly retarded user. You want a feature rich application that is so intuitive that it doesn't need a help manual? OK...go download AOL Desktop.

Did the programmers of that train wreck do it right? I mean, sure, a monkey with spike sticking out of its forehead could probably navigate the internet with it. It's designed with that specific user in mind. Problem is, the program flows like a river of mud, offers zero freedom to the user, and takes advantage of the user's ignorance to push proprietary garbage.

Help files aren't something that you can do without. The most useful applications out there not only require a help file, but also an accompanying book or two to train you on them (Look at Photoshop, for example).


And that's one of the arguments that pisses me off when people talk about their reluctance to move from one software package to another.

Microsoft told everyone that there would be a significant retraining cost if people moved from Office 2003 to OpenOffice. The user interfaces are different, things are in different places, etc. etc. etc. Therefore, you shouldn't switch to OpenOffice. And then Microsoft went and screwed around with a major interface change for Office 2007, saying it was better.

WTF? Most users are going to need to look at help files and supplemental books anyway. If that's the case, then how significant are the retraining costs really??

And although I use OpenOffice here, this applies to any other similar packages (MS Money vs Quicken; Word vs WordPerfect; Excel vs Lotus).

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 12:51 • by cb (unregistered)
235482 in reply to 235387
Andy Goth:
My guess is that you have to check both boxes before it'll let you delete the account. <snip>
My guess is that the first check-box is required for any deletion to take place, while the second one determines whether the item will go to a "recycle bin" of some kind or will be directly exterminated...

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 12:58 • by Bobblehead Troll (unregistered)
235484 in reply to 235476
nonpartisan:
Microsoft told everyone that there would be a significant retraining cost if people moved from Office 2003 to OpenOffice. The user interfaces are different, things are in different places, etc. etc. etc. Therefore, you shouldn't switch to OpenOffice. And then Microsoft went and screwed around with a major interface change for Office 2007, saying it was better.

WTF? Most users are going to need to look at help files and supplemental books anyway. If that's the case, then how significant are the retraining costs really??


This isn't a wtf. It is just that their course materials and tech support divisions 'needed' a profitability boost. They don't get any money from OpenOffice books, after all.

Re: Unhelpful Help

2008-12-18 13:13 • by Zork (unregistered)
235487 in reply to 235410
campkev:
Enter username, or HELP> help
Enter username, or help> HELP
Enter username, or HELP> admin
Enter username, or HELP> username, or HELP
'Bout time. You're kinda slow, aren't you? What do you want to do now?>
GO NORTH. KILL TROLL WITH AXE.
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