• newbie (unregistered)

    nice story!

  • verisimilidude (unregistered)

    10:30 central - you got it up early today. Thanks I needed it.

  • Dante (unregistered)

    @ the last comment:

    I'm sure there's a story detailing the day that the IT department fucked with potential candidates by sending in a guy in a dirty white shirt and sandals to spout relational database optimizations at the potential candidates...

  • JRock (unregistered) in reply to Dante

    i had an interview with a distribution company some years back. after interviewing with the manager, the technical expert was ushered in to the room. this lady was missing many of her front teeth and her remaining teeth were brown and rotting as well as her gums. i thought i was going to puke. anyway, i couldn't look at her directly and proceeded to end the interview quickly and drive away from there as fast as possible.

  • (cs) in reply to JRock
    JRock:
    i had an interview with a distribution company some years back. after interviewing with the manager, the technical expert was ushered in to the room. this lady was missing many of her front teeth and her remaining teeth were brown and rotting as well as her gums. i thought i was going to puke. anyway, i couldn't look at her directly and proceeded to end the interview quickly and drive away from there as fast as possible.

    So, was this in the UK or the deep south of the good ol' US of A?

  • (cs)

    I like the parent-geeks who could have gotten the job themselves - well at least one of them ;)

  • Marion (unregistered) in reply to JRock
    JRock:
    i had an interview with a distribution company some years back. after interviewing with the manager, the technical expert was ushered in to the room. this lady was missing many of her front teeth and her remaining teeth were brown and rotting as well as her gums. i thought i was going to puke. anyway, i couldn't look at her directly and proceeded to end the interview quickly and drive away from there as fast as possible.

    That is really, really, insulting. I can't believe that's why you left, much less that you're admitting to it on here and telling the story. I'm a man damnit, I can't help it if I've gum disease and man boobs.

  • (cs) in reply to Marion
    Marion:
    That is really, really, insulting. I can't believe that's why you left, much less that you're admitting to it on here and telling the story. I'm a man damnit, I can't help it if I've gum disease and man boobs.

    And come to work in drag.

  • CynicalTyler (unregistered)

    While not technically an interview, I had an embarrassing/hilarious moment once at a career fair. I was walking around glancing at companies' posters to see who I was interested in talking to when a Navy officer began addressing me. Not wanting to be rude, I stopped and listened to his talk about all the wonderful benefits to signing away four years of your life. At the end, he asked me for my resume. Knowing that my resume had contact information on it and knowing that the armed forces employ some of the most annoying telemarketing/door-to-door schemes ever, I stammered: "Uhhh... I think I'm... going to hold on to it... Thanks!" and left. They didn't seem very amused.

  • grg (unregistered) in reply to newbie

    One enthusiastic candidate waited for me to finish my disclaimer on the language, then immediately said, "Wow, that should be fun. I just finished a book on PROBOL last week!"

    Way back we posted a job for someone that knew UCSD Pascal. Someone sent in a resume claiming "8 years experience with USCD Pascal".

    He didnt get an interview as:

    (1) "USCD" is a common mangling of "UCSD", mainly seen with people who don't know or can't remember what UCSD stands for.

    (2) "UCSD Pascal" had only existed for about three years at that time. Maybe he put out 266% ??

  • (cs)

    Did those parents think that the interviewer would just take them at their word that "he is a very good boy and do good job for you" without actually meeting the person or probing into any of his technical skills? LOL.

  • markerstore (unregistered) in reply to grg
    grg:
    (2) "UCSD Pascal" had only existed for about three years at that time. Maybe he put out 266% ??

    Maybe candidates wouldn't lie about things like that if hiring managers didn't post jobs requiring "15 years of Java experience".

  • KattMan (unregistered) in reply to Saladin
    Saladin:
    Did those parents think that the interviewer would just take them at their word that "he is a very good boy and do good job for you" without actually meeting the person or probing into any of his technical skills? LOL.

    Some middle eastern cultures see this practice as the norm. Those same cultures hold family honor above personal dreams.

  • Doug (unregistered) in reply to sammybaby
    sammybaby:
    Marion:
    That is really, really, insulting. I can't believe that's why you left, much less that you're admitting to it on here and telling the story. I'm a man damnit, I can't help it if I've gum disease and man boobs.

    And come to work in drag.

    Technically, he could have helped dressing in drag, that part was a personal choice.

    Captcha captcha.

  • Doug (unregistered) in reply to grg
    grg:
    >One enthusiastic candidate waited for me to finish my disclaimer on the language, then immediately said, "Wow, that should be fun. I just finished a book on PROBOL last week!"

    Way back we posted a job for someone that knew UCSD Pascal. Someone sent in a resume claiming "8 years experience with USCD Pascal".

    He didnt get an interview as:

    (1) "USCD" is a common mangling of "UCSD", mainly seen with people who don't know or can't remember what UCSD stands for.

    (2) "UCSD Pascal" had only existed for about three years at that time. Maybe he put out 266% ??

    Maybe you missed out on hiring the guy who worked 5 years to develop UCSD pascal.

    I worked in the development phase of a now popular language, I wonder if my resume has ever been rejected out of hand based on my having 'too many' years of experience.

  • Patrick (unregistered) in reply to Saladin
    Saladin:
    Did those parents think that the interviewer would just take them at their word that "he is a very good boy and do good job for you" without actually meeting the person or probing into any of his technical skills? LOL.

    The sad fact isn't the first I've heard of such a thing. If you keep up with higher ed news, many of the helicopter parents who hovered over their kids through college have kept doing it past graduation. Wait until you start getting calls about why Johnny didn't get the job he interviewed for, or why Billy didn't get a raise after his last evaluation!

  • TheD (unregistered)

    I had an interview once with a manager and the resident "technical guru". I got along great with the manager, but I knew that I was going to have trouble with the technical guy. He had poor hygiene, dressed poorly, and he obviously didn't have the use of one of his arms. I knew that I was going to have trouble because of his attitude and (what I perceived to be) his immediate and obvious dislike for me. He started asking me questions about designing databases. I'd forgotten some of the terms (like E-R diagram and normalization) but I was able to describe the processes effectively. Unfortunately, my knowledge of the processes wasn't what he was looking for, he wanted the actual term. Needless to say, I didn't get the job.

  • JRock (unregistered) in reply to cmccorvey
    cmccorvey:
    JRock:
    i had an interview with a distribution company some years back. after interviewing with the manager, the technical expert was ushered in to the room. this lady was missing many of her front teeth and her remaining teeth were brown and rotting as well as her gums. i thought i was going to puke. anyway, i couldn't look at her directly and proceeded to end the interview quickly and drive away from there as fast as possible.

    So, was this in the UK or the deep south of the good ol' US of A?

    this was in the blue blooded state of connecticut.

  • JRock (unregistered) in reply to Marion
    Marion:
    JRock:
    i had an interview with a distribution company some years back. after interviewing with the manager, the technical expert was ushered in to the room. this lady was missing many of her front teeth and her remaining teeth were brown and rotting as well as her gums. i thought i was going to puke. anyway, i couldn't look at her directly and proceeded to end the interview quickly and drive away from there as fast as possible.

    That is really, really, insulting. I can't believe that's why you left, much less that you're admitting to it on here and telling the story. I'm a man damnit, I can't help it if I've gum disease and man boobs.

    thats funny. seriously, she may have been the ugliest woman i've ever seen.

  • akatherder (unregistered)

    I was interviewing for a ".Net web development" position.

    The very first question the interviewer asks...

    Jerk: What do you know about perl? Me: perl? I can spell it on a good day.
    Jerk: Haha, ok how? Me: p-e-r-l Jerk: You missed the A.

    I caught a glance at his cheat sheet of questions and it even had perl spelled out correctly.

  • British Teeth (unregistered) in reply to JRock

    One question that pops up in my mind... "So does your company have dental plan?"

  • JRock (unregistered) in reply to JRock

    interviews are interesting i recently had a 4 hour interview for a consulting gig at an engineering firm. yeah - 4 hours. first hour was with 1 developer talking about how great his reports were. second hour was with a developer and we talked about his recent gain of us citizienship. 3rd hour was with the hr manager and we talked about our kids and taking them to amusement parks. 4th hour was with the department manager and that was the only real interviewing part of the process. i never talked about myself so much in my life.

    i got the gig but turned them down. i don't think they were too happy about that.

  • (cs) in reply to JRock
    JRock:
    i recently had a 4 hour interview for a consulting gig at an engineering firm. yeah - 4 hours.

    You're complaining about a 4 hour interview? My last one dragged on for 10...

    -cw

  • ceegh (unregistered)

    I thought I had a nice job in the bag once, having "aced" the technical aspects and providing a resume that matched nicely with the position, until I got to the HR portion.

    In my college career we had a wonderful group of retired women who helped around the area I worked in at the university. They proudly referred to themselves as "the old ladies", and we all used the term freely with them. Unfortunately, I couldn't check my swing on using the term (in describing how that relationship improved my ability to interact with different skill levels) in the interview with the HR director, a woman of around age 55. I was so flustered after I realized I had said it that I never did try to explain it.

  • (cs)

    At one place, I had an interview with one of the programmers I would be working with. He told me he had a bug to fix and could I help him with it? We worked together and found the bug. We found out that we got along well and both had good skills. I worked with him for several years after that. So sometimes unusual interviews turn out OK. I don't think it would have gone so well if it had been a deliberate setup, so I don't recommend setting up a fake bug.

  • (cs) in reply to Marion

    I actually HATE all that "false image" crap with having suits and all. I'd go for the dirty khahki guy, if he has a good attitude.

    Too bad most gurus have a real attitude problem. I remember getting called "lammer" (yes, with the extra M) by some self-proclaimed guru. The reason? I sent him a joke sig I found saying

    Remember, only God and Esc+:w saves.

    I shouldn't have done it. I got served a 15 minute crapfest on "how Esc+:w doesn't always save, better to use ZZ" down to "only lammers use that".

    And yes, again, with the double M. Sheesh. Fortunately, no one that demented has ever interviewed me. :)

  • Sumit (unregistered) in reply to KattMan

    This story is a bit too Dilbertian to be true. Lest the Indian name in the story and this comment make it appear like that's a common practice in the East, that's far from the truth. Parents will use their contacts and influence to get their offspring jobs, and nepotism may lead to farcical interviews, but that's another thing and quite universal. If this story is true, it's a wacko story in any culture.

  • (cs) in reply to newfweiler
    newfweiler:
    At one place, I had an interview with one of the programmers I would be working with. He told me he had a bug to fix and could I help him with it? We worked together and found the bug. We found out that we got along well and both had good skills. I worked with him for several years after that. So sometimes unusual interviews turn out OK. I don't think it would have gone so well if it had been a deliberate setup, so I don't recommend setting up a fake bug.

    Ooooh, something like that actually landed me what could be my first job at college!

    The Network dude was in the Comp. Lab searching a computer infected with the Blaster virus, and I decided to fire up Snort to search it. I found it, went up to him and told him which computer it was.

    2 days later, I get a job offer, to be one of the new CompLab's sysadmin.

  • K (unregistered) in reply to JRock
    JRock:
    3rd hour was with the hr manager and we talked about our kids and taking them to amusement parks.

    Wow, an HR manager clueless enough to talk with a candidate about his family? What HR guy doesn't know to steer away from topics like that, since it's illegal to discriminate in hiring based on your marital/family status?

  • Mike C. (unregistered)

    Never had the parents interview, but did have what must have been the entire family (including parents, grandma, and a few younger siblings) of a young middle eastern woman escort her to the interview for our programming internship. Our small reception area was a bit cramped for about an hour.

  • KattMan (unregistered) in reply to Sumit
    Sumit:
    This story is a bit too Dilbertian to be true. Lest the Indian name in the story and this comment make it appear like that's a common practice in the East, that's far from the truth. Parents will use their contacts and influence to get their offspring jobs, and nepotism may lead to farcical interviews, but that's another thing and quite universal. If this story is true, it's a wacko story in any culture.

    Call it western confusion. I've heard of this practice and been told it was common, can't recall by whom. I will however always concede to a native of the culture denying it, since in truth, I really don't know better.

  • Anon (unregistered) in reply to danixdefcon5
    danixdefcon5:
    I actually HATE all that "false image" crap with having suits and all. I'd go for the dirty khahki guy, _if_ he has a good attitude.

    Too bad most gurus have a real attitude problem. I remember getting called "lammer" (yes, with the extra M) by some self-proclaimed guru. The reason? I sent him a joke sig I found saying

    Remember, only God and Esc+:w saves.

    I shouldn't have done it. I got served a 15 minute crapfest on "how Esc+:w doesn't always save, better to use ZZ" down to "only lammers use that".

    And yes, again, with the double M. Sheesh. Fortunately, no one that demented has ever interviewed me. :)

    Oh come on, if he used the word 'lammer' he was obviously joking with you. This is just how geeks bust balls. It's not a guru thing, it's a guy thing.

  • JRock (unregistered) in reply to K

    i think this topic came up because he ran out of questions in the first 10 minutes of a 60 minute interview.

  • JRock (unregistered) in reply to CodeWhisperer
    CodeWhisperer:
    JRock:
    i recently had a 4 hour interview for a consulting gig at an engineering firm. yeah - 4 hours.

    You're complaining about a 4 hour interview? My last one dragged on for 10...

    -cw

    what position were you interviewing for? wow. i think i'd bill them for that.

  • TravisO (unregistered) in reply to CodeWhisperer
    CodeWhisperer:
    JRock:
    i recently had a 4 hour interview...

    My last one dragged on for 10...

    I haven't been on any interviews lately because of the time I spent in a Turkish Prison

    captcha: gladiatormovies

  • Anthony (unregistered)

    "Because of that, I always made it a point to bring it up early on in the interview so that we didn't waste eachother's time."

    Technically, by not clearing this requirement before the interview process, you had already wasted their time.

  • jtsampson (unregistered) in reply to K
    K:
    JRock:
    3rd hour was with the hr manager and we talked about our kids and taking them to amusement parks.

    Wow, an HR manager clueless enough to talk with a candidate about his family? What HR guy doesn't know to steer away from topics like that, since it's illegal to discriminate in hiring based on your marital/family status?

    I believe it. I once had an interviewer asked me about my parents. He was the owner of the company. When I told him that my father passed away, he then asked "When?", and added "Heart attack or stroke?". I figured next would be, "Would you please turn your head and cough?"

    I got up and left without a word.

  • IronWhiskers (unregistered) in reply to TheD

    ya, I pissed an interviewer off one time cause I said "adc" instead of "analog to digital converter"

  • AustinE (unregistered) in reply to JRock
    JRock:
    interviews are interesting i recently had a 4 hour interview for a consulting gig at an engineering firm. yeah - 4 hours. first hour was with 1 developer talking about how great his reports were. second hour was with a developer and we talked about his recent gain of us citizienship. 3rd hour was with the hr manager and we talked about our kids and taking them to amusement parks. 4th hour was with the department manager and that was the only real interviewing part of the process. i never talked about myself so much in my life.

    i got the gig but turned them down. i don't think they were too happy about that.

    i do interviews myself and while i have never talked about amusement parks, the interviews are never entirely about technical knowledge. In some instances up to 75% of an interview could be just bullshitting.

    i never talked about myself so much in my life.
    This is what i am looking for to see if that person is a good fit for the job and the environment that they would be working in. You may have all the technical skills in the world but if it is a laid-back environment and you are the kind of person that needs structure and deadlines then you won;t be right for us and we wont be right for you. And saying this doesn't get it across, bc people can easily lie. You;ve got to feel someone out by bullshitting with them. thats not a WTF.
  • rmg66 (unregistered)

    After moving to Ohio from very integrated Northern California, I interviewed for a consulting job near very segregated Cleveland.

    The Interviewer, an older woman, had mentioned that she lived in Beechwood, a suburb of Cleveland.

    Just off the cuff, and really not meaning any harm, I joked that "Oh Beechwood. My wife tells me that's where all the rich Jews live."

    I didn't mean anything derogatory by it. I just thought that it was funny that they all seemed to live in that one area.

    At any rate, the interview got real uncomfortable after that. She continued, and even went through all the motions of getting me set up as a consultant with the firm and promised to call, if any jobs came up.

    None did, of course.

  • Mark (unregistered)

    Reminds me of an interview a colleague had some years ago. He was going for a C++ development position with a company that produced accounts systems (I think). The sum total of the technical interview went something like this :-

    Interviewer: What C++ development environment do you use? Candidate: Visual Studio Interviewer: Okay (ticking box on his sheet), now what version? Candidate: 6 Interviewer: Okay (ticking another box on his sheet). Are you sure? Candidate: Er, yes Interviewer: Right then, thank you very much.

    and that was it. He was offered the job with a 10% increase on his current salary. Some people have all the luck...

  • Corporate Cog (unregistered)

    The Quintessential Übergeek: A video of this would no doubt be a side splitter. A decent comedy show could probably be made of such interviews.

  • Corporate Cog (unregistered) in reply to JRock
    JRock:
    the technical expert was ushered in to the room. this lady was missing many of her front teeth and her remaining teeth were brown and rotting as well as her gums. i thought i was going to puke. anyway, i couldn't look at her directly and proceeded to end the interview quickly and drive away from there as fast as possible.

    Don't talk about Paula like that!

  • Paul (unregistered)

    Regarding the interview by proxy, that sounds like a cock story to me.

  • waruwaru (unregistered)

    Either Stephan didn't believe in OOI (object oriented interview), or Rajib was polymorphic but yet didn't inheret the proper attributes from both of his parents. <ba-da-dum>

  • wpgDBA (unregistered) in reply to Dante

    I once applied for a DBA/UNIX sysadmin position. Had to go back three times.

    First was with the manager. Supposed to last an hour. We started talking and hit it off grat. Four hours later, we both looked at our watches in shock.

    Second was with the HR rep. Was my tie crooked? Did I have something caught between my teeth? Coldest response I have every had -- and that includes when I used to go to singles bars.

    But if I thought that was bad, did I have a wake-up call coming! The technical interview was with the current sysadmin and the DBA. The sysadmin had the opinion that he was The Creator's gift to UNIX.

    Of course, this in itself is not surprising: the sysadmin had an opinion on everything. Yes, he also answered his own questions. Their DBA was either shy or too bullied to speak. After two hours, I jumped on a pause for breath to ask the DBA directly what his opinion was on a slightly obscure Oracle topic. I didn't really care about his opinion; I just wanted to hear him speak. He smiled gratefully, relaxed, and warmly began -- and of course the sysadmin ...

    My final opportunity to talk ("So is there anything you would like to add?") launched me into a three-minute speech about why the company really needed me personally. Well, three minutes of me talking and 30 minutes of sysadmin diatribe. I packed up and left, fuming.

    They didn't bother to offer me the job I was going to refuse anyway.

  • JRock (unregistered) in reply to AustinE
    AustinE:
    JRock:
    interviews are interesting i recently had a 4 hour interview for a consulting gig at an engineering firm. yeah - 4 hours. first hour was with 1 developer talking about how great his reports were. second hour was with a developer and we talked about his recent gain of us citizienship. 3rd hour was with the hr manager and we talked about our kids and taking them to amusement parks. 4th hour was with the department manager and that was the only real interviewing part of the process. i never talked about myself so much in my life.

    i got the gig but turned them down. i don't think they were too happy about that.

    i do interviews myself and while i have never talked about amusement parks, the interviews are never entirely about technical knowledge. In some instances up to 75% of an interview could be just bullshitting.

    i never talked about myself so much in my life.
    This is what i am looking for to see if that person is a good fit for the job and the environment that they would be working in. You may have all the technical skills in the world but if it is a laid-back environment and you are the kind of person that needs structure and deadlines then you won;t be right for us and we wont be right for you. And saying this doesn't get it across, bc people can easily lie. You;ve got to feel someone out by bullshitting with them. thats not a WTF.

    i can understand the point of that. but 4 hours? oy. i was making up stuff to talk about.

  • been there (unregistered) in reply to waruwaru

    Over the years I've gone on a couple of interviews where they ask me how I'd fix a 'hypothetical' production problem. I quickly caught on that they were scambling and didn't know how to fix something, and were looking for some free advice.

    I've also gone on interviews where they'd ask me how to design something. Then I'd notice that they had the kind of sketches you'd normally make when trying to figure out how to do something. If I was certain they were looking for free advice, I'd invariably tell them enough to let them know I knew how to solve the problem. Then they'd ask for more information. My response? "I'll tell you the ending after I start work", and then cut the interview short.

  • (cs) in reply to Dante
    Alex Papadimoulis:
    ...One enthusiastic candidate waited for me to finish my disclaimer on the language, then immediately said, "Wow, that should be fun. I just finished a book on PROBOL last week!"
    Being an Evil One, I would have had some fun with this:

    me: Oh really, which one? him: Ummm... me: Could you bring it in? Ours isn't for the latest version of the software.

    I can picture him scouring every bookstore and the entire Internet looking for this book to read before his next interview.

  • (cs) in reply to TheD
    TheD:
    I had an interview once with a manager and the resident "technical guru". I got along great with the manager, but I knew that I was going to have trouble with the technical guy. He had poor hygiene, dressed poorly, and he obviously didn't have the use of one of his arms. I knew that I was going to have trouble because of his attitude and (what I perceived to be) his immediate and obvious dislike for me. He started asking me questions about designing databases. I'd forgotten some of the terms (like E-R diagram and normalization) but I was able to describe the processes effectively. Unfortunately, my knowledge of the processes wasn't what he was looking for, he wanted the actual term. Needless to say, I didn't get the job.

    I had the same thing happen to me except he obviously didn't like me just by me showing up for the interview to ruin his day. <idiots are everywhere/>

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