• (cs)

    The big no sign just reminded me of my trip to Italy when I was a kid. We went to a bank to exchange some currency, and there was a whole row of "big red no" signs. Standard stuff: no smoking, no dogs, etc. The last one was "no robbing the bank". It had a hamburglar looking figure holding up the teller, with a big red no symbol around it.

    I took a picture, but lost it somewhere along the years.

  • dextron (unregistered)

    I couldn't figure out what was so WTFy about the bottom image of the "Trim Gauge" a multipurpose tool. Took a bit to realize it was an advert. and not part of the lineup.

    A friend of mine teaches a forklift safety course. He tells me people are always killing themselves doing dumb stuff with with those sort of devices.

  • (cs)

    When I was growing up, my mom put up a "No windsurfing" sign in our loo. We soon forgot about it, but it amused guests.

  • Socket (unregistered)

    TRWTF is that it looks like someone went in to fix one of the paragraphs but stopped before even finishing that one.

  • Anonymous Howard (unregistered)

    The Enrichment Center promises to always provide safe testing environments. In dangerous testing environments, the Enrichment Center promises to always provide useful advice. For instance, the floor here will kill you. Try to avoid it.

  • Carra (unregistered)

    Made in China?

    Translated in China!

  • Carra (unregistered)

    Made in China?

    Translated in China!

  • (cs)

    I gotta get one of those ear Michaelrophones so I can speak Engrish while play favorite game with the friend chat. For great justice!

  • Josh (unregistered) in reply to Carra

    I'm a freelance tech editor, and it really does amaze me how bad the translations of some of this stuff is. I make $35-50/hr, and for something as short on the ad copy on that packaging, it would probably take me maybe an hour or two of going back and forth with a Chinese speaker who is semi-competent in English and who has access to the original text to fix. So it would cost them $100, $150 tops not to look like morons -- and no doubt significantly less if they instead just hire one of the I'm sure many people in China who are fluent in English.

  • Josh (unregistered) in reply to Josh

    Er, translations of some of this stuff are ... OK, I'm off duty this morning.

  • Vollhorst (unregistered) in reply to Josh

    Press galaxy to drive away...

    I love those translations...

  • AndStuff (unregistered)

    I have found my new desktop wallpaper. Must remember to avoid falling.

  • sjs (unregistered) in reply to vt_mruhlin

    I can picture a robber, clad in his balaclava, going up to that bank reading to rob it. Only to notice the "NO ROBBING US!" sign, slumping his shoulders and sulking away, feet dragging, big sigh.

  • (cs) in reply to sjs
    sjs:
    I can picture a robber, clad in his balaclava, going up to that bank reading to rob it. Only to notice the "NO ROBBING US!" sign, slumping his shoulders and sulking away, feet dragging, big sigh.

    "Curses, foiled AGAIN!!"

  • (cs) in reply to AndStuff
    AndStuff:
    I have found my new desktop wallpaper. Must remember to avoid falling.
    Remember: you cannot fall off the floor.
  • Will You Be My Good Friend (unregistered) in reply to sjs

    I have a Xbox 360 headset and I'm sorry but there's no way it can replace "good friend contact." It just doesn't keep me warm at night and do...other things the way a good friend does.

  • (cs)

    In the local zoo they have a huge rock that kids constantly climb on. In order to prevent lawsuits the zoo placed a warning sign next to it.

    "No slipping from this rock"

    With an explanation that slipping and falling would get you kicked out of the zoo....

  • (cs) in reply to Anonymous Howard
    Anonymous Howard:
    The Enrichment Center promises to always provide safe testing environments. In dangerous testing environments, the Enrichment Center promises to always provide useful advice. For instance, the floor here will kill you. Try to avoid it.
    The cake is a lie.
  • Kender (unregistered)

    I once went to China to explain to them that those online translator websites are not as good as they think.

    I couldn't get anyone to understand me though...

  • my name is missing (unregistered)

    Another great warning sign was at the Raleigh-Durham airport, which showed all the things you could not bring into an airplane. Among the images was a lit bomb. The sign helpfully concluded "these items should be left at home".

  • s. (unregistered)

    "The Enrichment Center promises to always provide safe testing environments. In dangerous testing environments, the Enrichment Center promises to always provide useful advice. For instance, the floor here will kill you. Try to avoid it."

  • Skip Sailors (unregistered)

    All your XBox are belong to us!

  • (cs) in reply to Skip Sailors

    It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop when you impact with the ground!

    The sign should have a crossed out image of someone going splat next to the lift!

  • (cs) in reply to sjs
    sjs:
    I can picture a robber, clad in his balaclava, going up to that bank reading to rob it. Only to notice the "NO ROBBING US!" sign, slumping his shoulders and sulking away, feet dragging, big sigh.

    Virginia Tech always had gay/lesbian/bi "safe zone" stickers on doors to a ton of the buildings. Never quite knew what those were for either.

    I always pictured a big herd of rednecks chasing some gay guy through Blacksburg with torches and pitchforks, but stopping and shaking their fists when he runs into the door of Squires Student Center.

    It would also work well as a Mentos commercial.

  • don't blame me, I just live here (unregistered) in reply to sjs

    "I can picture a robber, clad in his balaclava, going up to that bank reading to rob it. Only to notice the "NO ROBBING US!" sign, slumping his shoulders and sulking away, feet dragging, big sigh."

    Go ahead, laugh, but there are many legislators in the US who really do believe that a picture of a pistol with a circle and slash on it will have exactly this effect.

  • Splat (unregistered) in reply to snoofle
    snoofle:
    It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop when you impact with the ground!

    The sign should have a crossed out image of someone going splat next to the lift!

    Actually, it is not the sudden stop that kills you, it is the sudden stop of some parts of you, combined with the other parts of you that don't stop as suddenly.

  • Anon (unregistered)

    I wonder, with all the bad translation of Chinese into English that we laugh at, are there bad English to Chinese translations that the Chinese laugh at? Are their Chinese websites dedicated to bad English -> Chinese translation?

    There was, for instance, the story of Coca Cola's first launch in China as "Bite the wax tadpole" (http://www.snopes.com/cokelore/tadpole.asp)

  • (cs)

    Fuck the Microphone into the plug

    http://chinglish.pages.googlepages.com/index.html

  • (cs) in reply to snoofle
    snoofle:
    It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop when you impact with the ground!
    Or what's falling right behind you...

    http://www.snopes.com/photos/gruesome/catdozer.asp

    [image]

    Addendum (2008-01-11 11:18): Hmm... apparently, the folks at Snopes get downright possessive about their images.

  • Ken B (unregistered) in reply to sjs
    sjs:
    I can picture a robber, clad in his balaclava, going up to that bank reading to rob it. Only to notice the "NO ROBBING US!" sign, slumping his shoulders and sulking away, feet dragging, big sigh.
    Reminds me of signs I saw while in Boston a few years ago: No parking on this sidewalk.

    Yes, they actually said "this sidewalk". Apparently, parking on other sidewalks is allowed.

  • (cs) in reply to Anon
    Anon:
    There was, for instance, the story of Coca Cola's first launch in China as "Bite the wax tadpole"
    I don't know about Chinese, but I heard a tale of how Chevrolet didn't understand why its Nova wasn't selling in Mexico.

    (No va = "it doesn't go")

  • (cs)

    Note to side the with microphone telly. Inside box phone micro ear ringer speak into micro. Plug to controller for personal communication work career.

  • (cs)

    That XBox 360 headphone looks like a cheap knock-off and not the genuine product.

    Still hilarious. :)

  • uncharted_rectifier (unregistered)

    The last one reminds me of http://www.engrish.com/

  • AndStuff (unregistered) in reply to FredSaw
    FredSaw:
    AndStuff:
    I have found my new desktop wallpaper. Must remember to avoid falling.
    Remember: you cannot fall off the floor.

    Yes, but there always is the chair.

  • Patrick (unregistered) in reply to FredSaw
    FredSaw:
    Remember: you cannot fall off the floor.

    But you can fall through the floor.

  • Choke_Artist (unregistered)

    My personal favorite comes courtesy of Dell. You can thank them for these warnings...

    The original... [image]

    and the updated... [image]

  • (cs) in reply to FredSaw
    FredSaw:
    Remember: you cannot fall off the floor.

    Well clearly you have never been drunk enough!

  • (cs) in reply to Benanov
    Benanov:
    That XBox 360 headphone looks like a cheap knock-off and not the genuine product.

    Still hilarious. :)

    Correct. I purchased it off ebay from a guy in Japan.

  • (cs)

    I immediately understood the Ear Michael thing.

    The text originally said "ear mike" and they did a global search-and-replace. Don't know why they did it on the back of a package, but there you go.

  • David Walker (unregistered) in reply to Ken B
    Ken B:
    Reminds me of signs I saw while in Boston a few years ago: No parking on this sidewalk.

    Yes, they actually said "this sidewalk". Apparently, parking on other sidewalks is allowed.

    In San Francisco, there are lots of signs that say "Bus Stop - No Standing".

    What, we're supposed to sit on the curb at the bus stop? Or hop up and down? We can't just stand there?

    I found out that "standing" means sitting in your car while the car is idling. I didn't know that.

    Still, "Bus Stop - No Standing" is a stupid sign.

  • (cs) in reply to Anon
    Anon:
    I wonder, with all the bad translation of Chinese into English that we laugh at, are there bad English to Chinese translations that the Chinese laugh at? Are their Chinese websites dedicated to bad English -> Chinese translation?

    There was, for instance, the story of Coca Cola's first launch in China as "Bite the wax tadpole" (http://www.snopes.com/cokelore/tadpole.asp)

    I've also heard of a Coca-Cola slogan being translated to Japanese as something like "Coca-Cola raises your ancestors from the dead".

    My spanish teacher used to tell me about how poorly the Chevy Nova sold in South America because "no va" means "doesn't go" in spanish.

  • elias (unregistered) in reply to WhiskeyJack
    WhiskeyJack:
    sjs:
    I can picture a robber, clad in his balaclava, going up to that bank reading to rob it. Only to notice the "NO ROBBING US!" sign, slumping his shoulders and sulking away, feet dragging, big sigh.

    "Curses, foiled AGAIN!!"

    Haha, that is awesome.
  • AdT (unregistered) in reply to FredSaw
    FredSaw:
    Or what's falling right behind you...

    It seems like he tried to drive the vehicle off the flatbed but its high center of mass caused it to turn over.

  • me (unregistered) in reply to vt_mruhlin

    A McDonald's "restaurant" here in Switzerland also had, for a time, a bright yellow disclaimer near the counter: "The money is located in a safe. It can only be opened in the presence of the money courier."

  • (cs) in reply to Josh
    Josh:
    I'm a freelance tech editor, and it really does amaze me how bad the translations of some of this stuff is. I make $35-50/hr, and for something as short on the ad copy on that packaging, it would probably take me maybe an hour or two of going back and forth with a Chinese speaker who is semi-competent in English and who has access to the original text to fix. So it would cost them $100, $150 tops not to look like morons -- and no doubt significantly less if they instead just hire one of the I'm sure many people in China who are fluent in English.

    Yeah--it looks like they used the Altavista Babelfish to translate it to English.

  • The Undroid (unregistered)

    A roommate claimed to have been in a French class in which a student aiming to describe "piles of snow" incautiously chose the wrong "piles" entry in the dictionary. But I assume he never got as far as drafting product information.

  • Joe Luser (unregistered) in reply to DeLos
    DeLos:
    FredSaw:
    Remember: you cannot fall off the floor.

    Well clearly you have never been drunk enough!

    "You are not drunk if you can lie on the floor without needing to hold on." Author currently not known to this poster

  • Not a SOX fan (unregistered) in reply to don't blame me, I just live here
    don't blame me:
    "I can picture a robber, clad in his balaclava, going up to that bank reading to rob it. Only to notice the "NO ROBBING US!" sign, slumping his shoulders and sulking away, feet dragging, big sigh."

    Go ahead, laugh, but there are many legislators in the US who really do believe that a picture of a pistol with a circle and slash on it will have exactly this effect.

    Which explains Sarbanes-Oxley.
  • (cs) in reply to The Undroid
    The Undroid:
    A roommate claimed to have been in a French class in which a student aiming to describe "piles of snow" incautiously chose the wrong "piles" entry in the dictionary. But I assume he never got as far as drafting product information.
    At least they wouldn't cause a burning sensation.

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