• (cs)

    Why can't every business have a position like that? Do, virtually, nothing; get paid for it; and never worry about being fired..."job security" from nothing...

    Though, I still want to know who f'ed up in HR...

  • Billy Bob Jamie Joe Hickboy (unregistered)

    I had a job like that once... Help Desk Support. Only took the company 4 months to actually install the phone. I graduated college and left the week after they were installed.

  • spamparranoid (unregistered)

    Sounds like a nice position. So this begs the question. How long do they have to wait before they can lay him off? Must be nice, but i wouldn't say that he has job security.

  • Elena (unregistered)

    Chris probably doesn't get paid enough to do what he does.

  • Nik (unregistered)

    I'm curious as to how would Chris fare on other job interviews now, after all this "experience" ad Doghouse.

  • Le Verne (unregistered)

    Accordingly the The Inner-Platform Effect link is done for the day... WTF?

    CAPTCHA: kungfu (drunken integrator style I presume)

  • mister_fab (unregistered)

    Definitely not a WTF - or may be one that made the company better than it was before the hire. From what I can see, this guy has a very valuable job in the company - not talking about the source control here but his unofficial listening role.

  • Ken (unregistered) in reply to spamparranoid
    spamparranoid:
    How long do they have to wait before they can lay him off? Must be nice, but i wouldn't say that he has job security.
    They probably can't fire him, because they don't know who hired him, nor which department he works for.
  • PeriSoft (unregistered)

    Wasn't there a Tom Hanks movie about this?

  • Okie (unregistered)

    This is really a key position. Developers come and go, but if you lose your source code....the global economy will collapse.

  • G-Unit (unregistered)

    I sort of feel bad for Chris. He's not getting any on the job experience, and when he gets let go (and he will get let go when profit margins decrease and management needs to get rid of "extra baggage") he will have a hard time finding new work. At the very least I'm hoping the guy is doing something to improve his skill, especially since he has all of that free time.


    Shameless plug: Free books, lectures and tutorials @ www.bookgoldmine.com

  • Annekat (unregistered) in reply to Le Verne

    The bad one is: http://thedailywtf.com/(http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/The_Inner-Platform_Effect.aspx

    The REAL url is: http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/The_Inner-Platform_Effect.aspx

  • Jaywalker (unregistered)

    "Doghouse" Insurance? Could this be the company that uses Snoopy as their mascot?

  • Top Cod3r (unregistered) in reply to noehch
    noehch:
    Why can't every business have a position like that? Do, virtually, nothing; get paid for it; and never worry about being fired..."job security" from nothing...

    Though, I still want to know who f'ed up in HR...

    They do, its called DBA.

    bada-bing!

  • PseudoNoise (unregistered)

    If they really wanted to get rid of him they could just move him to the basement and take his stapler.

  • DM (unregistered) in reply to Top Cod3r
    Top Cod3r:
    noehch:
    Why can't every business have a position like that? Do, virtually, nothing; get paid for it; and never worry about being fired..."job security" from nothing...

    Though, I still want to know who f'ed up in HR...

    They do, its called DBA.

    bada-bing!

    Talk about a low blow....there are DBA's out there that acutally do something.

    CAPTCHA: dubya....talk about someone who does nothing!

  • Johnie (unregistered)

    Reminds me of this:

    BOB SLYDELL Just a second there, Professor. We, uh, we fixed the glitch. So he won't be receiving a paycheck anymore. So it'll just work itself out naturally.
  • CAPTCHA: pinball (unregistered) in reply to DM

    Finding DBAs that actually do something is like stuffing toothpaste back into the tube. You can do it... but it might just be easier to get a different tube.

  • (cs)

    This was a nice story. I like Chris already.

    Any idea how long he's held the position?

  • Jerry Smith (unregistered)

    I posted the first comment as soon as I saw the story go up.

    I verified my comment was there, then a few minutes later it was gone. Presumably deleted.

    Why was my comment deleted? because i'm unregistered?

    my post consisted of "First!?"

  • Scottford (unregistered) in reply to Jerry Smith
    Jerry Smith:
    Why was my comment deleted? because i'm unregistered?

    my post consisted of "First!?"

    Now this is far more humorous than today's story.

  • (cs) in reply to Scottford
    Scottford:
    Jerry Smith:
    Why was my comment deleted? because i'm unregistered?

    my post consisted of "First!?"

    Now this is far more humorous than today's story.

    I'd almost agree with you...but, it's really too sad to laugh at...

  • Desert Transplant (unregistered)

    I spent an entire four-month summer internship waiting for the security clearance that I had applied for the previous November. Instead of doing whatever programming task this government contractor hired me for, I wound up doing data entry and spending time on Usenet (this was before the WWW). My clearance was still not done by the end of the summer, so the process was cancelled.

  • nobody (unregistered)

    I had a boss once at a former large minicomputer company who said that he received a rejection letter from HR two weeks after he started work there.

  • (cs) in reply to G-Unit
    G-Unit:
    I sort of feel bad for Chris. He's not getting any on the job experience, and when he gets let go (and he will get let go when profit margins decrease and management needs to get rid of "extra baggage") he will have a hard time finding new work.

    He is gaining a huge amount of experience that could be used to sell himself as a "work force motivation specialist." With the right marketing, he can probably start his own consulting company.

  • dustin (unregistered) in reply to Jerry Smith
    Jerry Smith:
    I posted the first comment as soon as I saw the story go up.

    I verified my comment was there, then a few minutes later it was gone. Presumably deleted.

    Why was my comment deleted? because i'm unregistered?

    my post consisted of "First!?"

    I posted second!!!!1111 even though I was actually the 3rd post and mine got deleted too :(

  • Smith (unregistered) in reply to Ken
    Ken:
    spamparranoid:
    How long do they have to wait before they can lay him off? Must be nice, but i wouldn't say that he has job security.
    They probably can't fire him, because they don't know who hired him, nor which department he works for.
    Thanks for reminding me of Catch-22 after such a long time
  • (cs) in reply to nobody
    nobody:
    I had a boss once at a former large minicomputer company who said that he received a rejection letter from HR two weeks after he started work there.
    That would make me quite nervous...
  • Chris (unregistered) in reply to Jerry Smith
    Jerry Smith:
    Why was my comment deleted? because i'm unregistered?

    my post consisted of "First!?"

    Yay for the forum software. I've heard of some custom forum software that hides spam from everybody who but the person who posted it -- the people spamming their crap don't know that their stuff is being erased and don't complain or attempt to circumvent the filters.

  • Anonymouse (unregistered)

    So he's like the deanna troi of that company?

    About job security, i think he'll be allright if he can work up the ladder. First start listening to the devs, then the project leaders then the office manager, and when he get's the big boss himself at his desk (i'm assuming he will have a desk by that time) he'll be alright.

  • (cs) in reply to noehch

    A while back I was moved to a position where my main responsibility was: I was supposed to answer any phoned-in questions about Sun workstations at a large university.

    Fortunately for me, it seems all the Sun users had figured out the last guy in my position was a total disaster-- it was better to not call at all than to risk getting him involved.

    So the first day I got in at 8:00 AM and waited for the first call. Funny, no calls all day.

    About three weeks later the phone rang. Wrong number.

    I used the spare time to build a computer, learn Oracle, SQL, Linux, and much more.

    I think the calls ended up averaging about one a month.

    Eventually I got bored and found another job.

  • (cs) in reply to Ancient_Hacker
    Ancient_Hacker:
    A while back I was moved to a position where my main responsibility was: I was supposed to answer any phoned-in questions about Sun workstations at a large university.

    Fortunately for me, it seems all the Sun users had figured out the last guy in my position was a total disaster-- it was better to not call at all than to risk getting him involved.

    So the first day I got in at 8:00 AM and waited for the first call. Funny, no calls all day.

    About three weeks later the phone rang. Wrong number.

    I used the spare time to build a computer, learn Oracle, SQL, Linux, and much more.

    I think the calls ended up averaging about one a month.

    Eventually I got bored and found another job.

    Eventually?

    I have the attention span of a gnat. I wouldn't last a day in a job like that. I admire your patience and self-growth!

  • lmodllmodl (unregistered) in reply to DM
    DM:
    Top Cod3r:
    noehch:
    Why can't every business have a position like that? Do, virtually, nothing; get paid for it; and never worry about being fired..."job security" from nothing...

    Though, I still want to know who f'ed up in HR...

    They do, its called DBA.

    bada-bing!

    Talk about a low blow....there are DBA's out there that acutally do something.

    CAPTCHA: dubya....talk about someone who does nothing!

    Hey... I'm a DB2 DBA, and I do quite a bit. When I took over, the company's as/400 was so loaded down with old duplicate data, and unoptimized code that it looked to be near then end of it's useful life. It takes a lot of work to review 6 years of built up code to find places to improve and tweak, the system is now far more responsive, uses less processor, and far less disk space.

    Granted, even a good DBA can appear to be doing nothing a large portion of the time, but.... even a decent one will more then pay for themselves very easily.

  • muttonchop (unregistered) in reply to nobody
    nobody:
    I had a boss once at a former large minicomputer company who said that he received a rejection letter from HR two weeks after he started work there.

    I had a similar thing happen with a credit card application. They mailed me a card, and then a couple weeks later I received a letter saying that they had rejected my application.

  • Corporate Cog (unregistered) in reply to Nik
    Nik:
    I'm curious as to how would Chris fare on other job interviews now, after all this "experience" ad Doghouse.

    Don't be silly. This doesn't matter to folks like Chris - he's found his calling. I've seen several cases of this in government. The person is living the dream and they'll ride it out for as long as possible. It takes a special person.

  • (cs) in reply to spamparranoid
    spamparranoid:
    Sounds like a nice position. So this begs the question. How long do they have to wait before they can lay him off? Must be nice, but i wouldn't say that he has job security.
    Until he screws up. Otherwise, wrongful dismissal suit baby!

    Luckily, he has no responsibilities, so it's impossible for him to screw up!

    It's sounding more and more like Chris has the best job ever. Especially if this is one of those companies that automatically gives you a raise of a certain amount every single year.

  • Top Cod3r (unregistered) in reply to lmodllmodl
    lmodllmodl:
    DM:
    Top Cod3r:
    noehch:
    Why can't every business have a position like that? Do, virtually, nothing; get paid for it; and never worry about being fired..."job security" from nothing...

    Though, I still want to know who f'ed up in HR...

    They do, its called DBA.

    bada-bing!

    Talk about a low blow....there are DBA's out there that acutally do something.

    CAPTCHA: dubya....talk about someone who does nothing!

    Hey... I'm a DB2 DBA, and I do quite a bit. When I took over, the company's as/400 was so loaded down with old duplicate data, and unoptimized code that it looked to be near then end of it's useful life. It takes a lot of work to review 6 years of built up code to find places to improve and tweak, the system is now far more responsive, uses less processor, and far less disk space.

    Granted, even a good DBA can appear to be doing nothing a large portion of the time, but.... even a decent one will more then pay for themselves very easily.

    Wow, this comment got alot of response. I was just kidding anyways, I just like to go down there and rattle their cages sometimes :)

  • Schmitter (unregistered)

    A friend of mine was a programer at company x. He applied for and got a postition at company y. He gave his notice and served out his last two weeks at company x, and was going to start work at company y the following Monday. Sunday night they call him at home and tell him that they no longer need the postion and not to bother coming in the next day. The suit netted him a few weeks vacation and a bunch of extra bucks burning a hole in his pocket. The moral is always make sure the offer letter is signed.

  • a/c (unregistered)

    All the offer letters I've ever received always included all sorts of legalese to the effect that "We are not actually committing to employing you for any length of time. We can and will terminate your employment for any reason at any time." Seems to me they could have retracted the offer when they figured it out.

    Also, the writeup isn't clear whether Chris was a bottom-of-the-barrel candidate or just the second-choice backup. He might not be altogether incompetent and it sounds like he's doing a good job. (The Source Control Guy can be very important in an organization.)

  • David (unregistered) in reply to PseudoNoise
    PseudoNoise:
    If they really wanted to get rid of him they could just move him to the basement and take his stapler.

    Dang, beat me to it.

  • (cs) in reply to Schmitter

    My parents know someone who has a kid who applied for a college transfer to Arizona State, and was offered a substantial scholarship. But it turned out that eventually it was discovered that the person who offered the scholarship wasn't authorized to do so. This guy was sacked, and the scholarship offer revoked. It's actually a pretty depressing story on all counts...

  • (cs)

    I had a job like this once. I screwed up a backup when we needed it at a stressful time for my manager. She had no IT experience and yet was considered the network admin. She had no spine either. Rather than fire me or write me up she grounded me to my office and would not speak to me. This went on from early January to the start of May.

    It worked for me. By late January I started looking for another job and in the mean time I taught myself how to use VB.NET, brushed up on C++ and Java and lived on the MSDN. I figured since I didn't have anything else to do, nothing stressing me out, I would quit smoking too. (I haven't smoked since)

    Turned out, in the beginning of May she started warming back up to me again, two weeks later I gave her a one week notice of my resignation and I am happily working as a programmer at my new job making $15,000/year more. Later, I found out from the #2 guy at that company that she was severely reprimanded and almost lost her job over it.

  • MX5Ringer (unregistered)

    WOW!!

    No really WOW!!!

    Windows Vista people would be soooo impressed with this WOW!

    I dream of things like this, I have to work for a living, and it's usually directors etc who are in Chris's position (except they are generally not nice people) I wish I knew Chris as he's the luckiest guy in the world.

    CAPTCHA 'ewww' it should have been 'COOOOOLLLLL'

  • Darryl Smith, VK2TDS (unregistered) in reply to EvanED

    During the Sydney 2000 Olympics I was working for the Olympic Broadcaster, SOBO. Actually I was working for one of their contractors. I was an Australian in Sydney, and this was a US company based in the USA. In order to get my olympic ID the application form was fedexed to me from the USA, and then I FedExed it back to the USA, and they then sent it back to Sydney.

    As the only Australian in a 35 person team this provided a few interesting complications. Firstly I had a phone call on the friday from the olympic people telling me that I needed to start on the Monday and wanting to know where I had to go. I had been working for two or three weeks already.

    I also receieved a VISA so I could legally work in the country. Yes, I was a local, and yes, I was born here. But I got a VISA. When I started work I got a per diem for being away from home. I would drive 30 minutes to work each day and had car parking at my site. I got paid in US dollars when the exchange doubled my pay.

    But the best bit was the tax. I got a letter saying that I did not need to pay Australian Income Tax. I think I needed to pay a once off US$10 pensylvania tax.

  • Michael (unregistered) in reply to Chris
    Chris:
    Jerry Smith:
    Why was my comment deleted? because i'm unregistered?

    my post consisted of "First!?"

    Yay for the forum software. I've heard of some custom forum software that hides spam from everybody who but the person who posted it -- the people spamming their crap don't know that their stuff is being erased and don't complain or attempt to circumvent the filters.

    I heard of an even better one that instead of simply showing the post to the spammer, actually replaces words randomly with ones from different "themed" dictionaries (like food products). Not only did it not bother legit users, it would drive the spammer crazy trying to figure out why his posts are coming out wrong.

  • (cs) in reply to a/c
    a/c:
    ...The Source Control Guy can be very important in an organization.

    I alone control The Source! Ultimate power is mine! Mwahahahahahaha! --Rank

  • (cs) in reply to Michael
    Michael:
    I heard of an even better one that instead of simply showing the post to the spammer, actually replaces words randomly with ones from different "themed" dictionaries (like food products). Not only did it not bother legit users, it would drive the spammer crazy trying to figure out why his posts are coming out wrong.

    The SomethingAwful forums once had a feature like that. Only the admins and the poster could see their posts. It apparently was quite maddening. :)

  • facetious (unregistered) in reply to Rank Amateur
    Rank Amateur:
    a/c:
    ...The Source Control Guy can be very important in an organization.

    I alone control The Source! Ultimate power is mine! Mwahahahahahaha! --Rank

    Does that make you Circuit City?

    ...

  • (cs) in reply to Jaywalker
    Jaywalker:
    "Doghouse" Insurance? Could this be the company that uses Snoopy as their mascot?

    My thought exactly. Must be Met Life...

  • Jonathan (unregistered) in reply to muttonchop
    muttonchop:

    I had a similar thing happen with a credit card application. They mailed me a card, and then a couple weeks later I received a letter saying that they had rejected my application.

    So does that mean you can run up a huge balance on the credit card. Then when they ask you to pay the bill you can show them the rejection letter and deny all knowledge...

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