• anonymous (unregistered)

    TRWTF is that this is a CodeSOD

    also, frist!

  • (nodebb)

    Next time, get the idiot CEO a Logitech K310, described as "washable". Info PDF here: https://www.logitech.com/assets/45942/washable-keyboard-k310-quick-start-guide.pdf (washing instructions on page 2).

    Of course, there's no way he'll actually follow those instructions (especially since the femtosecond is a conveniently-sized unit for measuring the time before the "USB cap" is lost). But hey, at least you tried...

  • Hanzito (unregistered)

    That's not only very WTFy, it's also truly funny.

  • Sauron (unregistered)

    Nice story lmao

  • (nodebb)

    Depends upon the brand of whiskey, of course.

  • Deeseearr (unregistered)

    This is, basically, how I got my first sysadmin job back in the dot-com years.

    I showed up for an interview with the owner of the company who was nowhere to be found. The sales manager (who wasn't very technical) assured me that he would be along soon and then conducted a very awkward interview. Twenty minutes later the owner burst into the office, said "Oh, you're interviewing, right? Here's a hypothetical question for you. Suppose you've locked yourself out of a UNIX server and need to get back in right away but don't have any of the passwords. What would you do?"

    I suggested a few options, all of which he ruled out, and ended by saying that the last resort would be to shut the server down, boot from the install CD and fix it from there. His eyes lit up and he said "Thank you, I'll be back to finish the interview in a few minutes."

    Naturally, a few minutes later he didn't come back so Sales Manager decided that an office tour would be a good way to kill some time. It ended in the back room where half of the staff was huddled around their main UNIX file and web server which had just been booted from an install CD so that the owner of the company could fix the password file.

    "Hey, it's you. You're hired."

  • Industrial Automation Engineer (unregistered)

    Had I been the candidate, I would run. Muddy tracks, brambles or a driving downpour with lightning - I don't care.

    You. Would. Not. Catch. Me.

  • (nodebb)

    Mission accomplished! The CEO has a crumb-free keyboard.

  • valued internet subscriber (unregistered)

    This one legitimately made me laugh out loud. Well done. And now I know what a suicide cable is, to boot!

  • Darren (unregistered)

    There does seem to be a direct correlation between how senior a position someone gets in a company and how little technical understanding they have.

    It's almost like all CxO job specifications have a line-item that reads 'Must not know a single thing about computers (including associated peripherals), mobile phones, televisions or printers and must not be willing to learn'.

  • (nodebb)

    Hilarious story. I laughed out loud.

  • Duke of New York (unregistered) in reply to anonymous

    Well, there must be some kind of code against male-to-male electric cables.

  • Argle (unregistered)

    I'm trying to remember where I read a humor article suggesting things like putting your keyboard in the dishwasher and the keycaps in silverware rack. After washing, take the opportunity rearrange the keys in alphabetic order, not that stupid QWERTY thing. It might have been my ancient April Fools edition of Dr. Dobbs.

    That aside: just breadcrumbs? Every so often I run something sturdy and thin (like a toothpick) between the rows of my assorted keyboards, I come up with something that... ick... looks like a horror film prop. Just imagine a 50's B-film "It Came from Between the Keys."

  • Randal L. Schwartz (github) in reply to Darren

    There does seem to be a direct correlation between how senior a position someone gets in a company and how little technical understanding they have. It's almost like all CxO job specifications have a line-item that reads 'Must not know a single thing about computers (including associated peripherals), mobile phones, televisions or printers and must not be willing to learn'.

    It's the "B ship" from H2G2, masquerading as the "A ship" through the Peter Principle.

    Addendum 2024-09-23 14:19: For those who don't get the reference (and shame on you if you haven't read H2G2:

    The "B ship" and "A ship" are mentioned in Douglas Adams' novel "The Restaurant at the End of the Universe", the second book in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series.

    The planet they were evacuating from was Golgafrincham. They ended up on prehistoric Earth. In the story, the Golgafrinchans, considered the useless third of their society, were tricked into leaving their planet on a spaceship (the B ark) under the pretense of an impending disaster. The A ark, carrying the leaders and thinkers, was supposed to follow, but it never arrived. The Golgafrinchans' arrival on Earth inadvertently caused the extinction of the indigenous hominids, paving the way for modern humans to evolve.

  • Officer Johnny Holzkopf (unregistered)

    No water needed - https://xkcd.com/237/ proves it by providing an entertaining and educating optical illusion.

  • JanVP (unregistered)

    "Keyboard dandruff" (by shaking an upside-down keyboard) indeed is gross.

  • (nodebb) in reply to Randal L. Schwartz

    More precisely, the "A" ark never even left Golgafrincham...

  • (nodebb)

    In adventure game logic, the answer would be obvious:

    GIVE suicidecable TO ceo

  • LZ79LRU (unregistered) in reply to Industrial Automation Engineer

    Honestly I do not understand why people don't. I mean, how hungry can you really be? I imagine a hell of a lot if you are willing to work with people like this.

    And I honestly do not think that the stupid people are to blame here. They really are not. Why would they ever take the time and effort to learn about computers when they can just pay enablers to enable them to remain ignorant? It's only when we as a profession collectively decide to enforce a minimum standard of competency by refusing to work with those bellow it at reasonable rates that things will change.

    As in, they won't ever change.

    #RemoveAllWarningLabels

  • (nodebb)

    Speaking of security, I have good news for everyone. NIST is bringing out new password rules and boy, after long last they seem reasonable. And yes, they recommend removing social engineering questions like "What is your fav pet name?".

    For those interested, here is a link (password rules can be found on page 13): https://nvlpubs.nist.gov/nistpubs/SpecialPublications/NIST.SP.800-63B-4.2pd.pdf

  • (nodebb) in reply to MaxiTB

    If by "is bringing out" you mean "published seven years ago".

  • (nodebb) in reply to Dragnslcr

    The text of the document says "August 2024", multiple times at that. Where did you get seven years ago?

  • (nodebb) in reply to gordonfish

    https://pages.nist.gov/800-63-3/sp800-63b.html

    If you look under the list of authors, you'll see "June 2017". I was using these guidelines at a job I left 5 years ago, so I knew they were published at least that long ago. Revision 4, which is what MaxiTB linked to, was published in 2024.

  • (nodebb) in reply to Dragnslcr

    Ok, though that is a different URL than what was given above, which is apparently for a later (4.2) revision. I wonder why they don't include the original publication date of the original draft somewhere in later revisions, as it would have helped avoid this confusion.

  • (nodebb) in reply to Dragnslcr

    The password rules were adjusted with the last Revision 4 (2024). The old version had a lot of SHOULD NOT which are SHALL NOT now. Big difference ;-)

  • dr. Bob (unregistered)

    This... This is soooo true to life .. i am sooooo tired.

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