• gosse (unregistered)

    Nice waste of money.

  • leppie (unregistered)

    Been there seen that (more than a few times)... :(

  • (cs)

    What's so hard? With the help of the dictionary and a few global renames, it should have quickly been legible. No comment on functional correctness.

  • Readers Digest (unregistered)

    New guy made funny noises / variable names. Fired. Boss had to work weekends. NoOneElseEverNoticed.

  • zach (unregistered)

    well captcha's been cracked...

  • Pete P. (unregistered)

    The true WTF is the spam comment not formatted right by the first time. Which leads me to the conclusion that this comment might be a WTF as well as soon as the spam is removed. (All that without adding 'Frist!' in the first place...

  • (cs)

    That's the lesson he learned? Really? How about "check the newbie's source control commits"? How about that?

  • (cs) in reply to Pete P.

    Well I would remove it if I could. Due to CS being a WTF in and of itself, mods cannot delete comments on articles. we're strictly forum monkies. Ammoq or Alex may be able to remove it. Hopefully without having to poke around in the DB

  • OldCoder (unregistered)

    The real WTF is expecting anyone who reads this site to be able to afford gold in the first place...

  • Oruko (unregistered)

    My ori is undergoing an ibi. Surely a wtf oba -- a serious ologun at least.

    Okus of my eguns, carry me ile...

  • (cs) in reply to zach
    zach:
    well captcha's been cracked...
    Just tried a little something out there: 
    $ gocr -i cap.jpg -C a-z
    Worked about 20% of the time. I'm sure a little processing before gocr (1 bit reduction with a certain threshold) would increase this. Not what I'd call cracking.
  • Lupus.Umbrae (unregistered) in reply to Oruko

    wow... The further I read this article the more my face morphed from a normal human face to a Ô_ó . I mean at the end it looked exactly like Ô_ó ...

  • blah (unregistered)

    Fools. They fired the man who is going to revolutionize quantum computing.

    Do re mi fa so la...

  • TSParent (unregistered)

    Normally, I only quietly read TDWTF, but today hit a nerve.

    "Making animal noises" wasn't the reason the person was fired, and I hope wasn't even one of the reasons they considered firing him. Making those types of sounds is a very recognizable symptom of Tourette's Syndrome. FIring the person for not performing their work is one thing. Firing them because of a disability that has them making odd sounds... wrong.

    (Most people have no realization of what complex verbal tics are, which can range from animal sounds to cursing. And yes, I have a son with TS, who not only "neighs" at times but also "paws" the air like a horse.)

    Sorry for the rant -- it just irritates me when I see people responding to TS (and TS-type symptoms) with prejudice due to lack of information.

    And, as someone who works with someone who still things single-character variable names are great -- why wasn't someone reviewing his code, and thus catching this WTF?

  • Anonymous (unregistered)

    Best excerpt from the mangled code:

    ourTree.bearFruits()
  • Richard (unregistered)

    We had a weird contractor once, oh, a decade ago. One of these guys who charged 5X what the regular code monkeys got, and wrote lots of crap that needed lots of hours from him to keep up and running. Eventually he went away, and I was left to fix (read: rewrite) one of his modules.

    Anyway, one of his habits was using 9 and 13 instead of TRUE and FALSE. I don't remember how long it took me to figure that out. <<Shudder>>

  • Anonymous (unregistered)

    If anyone on my team dared to pull that crap I would personally blacklist them across all our sites and would file a formal complaint with the agent that found them (assuming there was an agent involved, of course). If you want to code in Elven then bugger off to Rivendell. This is so utterly inappropriate, I really don't know how anyone could think they could get away with rubbish like this.

    Oh, and it looks like the inevitable finally happened: the spammers now outnumber regular visitors. Some sort of filter is inevitable so why not just filter according to link count (eg. >3 links and the post gets swallowed)? Very simple, easy to implement but should deter most of the spam.

  • Anonymous (unregistered) in reply to Readers Digest
    Readers Digest:
    New guy made funny noises / variable names. Fired. Boss had to work weekends. NoOneElseEverNoticed.
    You're not quite getting this, are you? The joke is that you trot out the "factual description" to highlight how boring the post was and to suggest that this is simply a machination of everyone's normal working day. The problem is, today's post was actually quite amusing and showed us something that, whilst not unknown, is fairly uncommon. As such, we'd all very much appreciate it if you could just crawl back into the rotten piece of wood that you emerged from and stay there until you have something relvant to say. Thanks from all at TDWTF!
  • My village needs me (unregistered) in reply to Richard
    Richard:
    We had a weird contractor once, oh, a decade ago. One of these guys who charged 5X what the regular code monkeys got, and wrote lots of crap that needed lots of hours from him to keep up and running. Eventually he went away, and I was left to fix (read: rewrite) one of his modules.

    Anyway, one of his habits was using 9 and 13 instead of TRUE and FALSE. I don't remember how long it took me to figure that out. <<Shudder>>

    OK, I give up, why 9 and 13?

  • Anonymous (unregistered) in reply to zach
    zach:
    well captcha's been cracked...
    They wish! If the captcha had been cracked and the spam posts were automatated then it wouldn't take them two tries to get the BBCode formatting right. So we have to assume that the spammers are actually lurking on TDWTF and posting their spam by hand. Which means we are dealing with the single most retared spammers ever to hock their wares over the internet! Hey spammers, I hope you're learning something!
  • (cs)

    Interestingly enough, the spam corrolates with the Elven theme from the article.

    But what I don't get is that, with so many Unix-based systems about, Alex insists on running this site on this rubbish Windows application that more security holes in it than the OS it runs on. Did I mention that you don't pay any license fee for any of that software?

  • Handalóra (unregistered) in reply to Anonymous
    Anonymous:
    If you want to code in Elven then bugger off to Rivendell.
    What a staggeringly racist remark. I've forwarded your post to the Council of Elrond as an example of the kind of persecution we face every day.
  • (cs)
    My village needs me:
    OK, I give up, why 9 and 13?
    Because 7 8... er, no...

    I know I use the "spirit" keyword all the time in my code. Very useful.

  • (cs) in reply to TSParent
    TSParent:
    " (Most people have no realization of what complex verbal tics are, which can range from animal sounds to cursing. And yes, I have a son with TS, who not only "neighs" at times but also "paws" the air like a horse.)

    Sorry for the rant -- it just irritates me when I see people responding to TS (and TS-type symptoms) with prejudice due to lack of information.

    ?

    Fully agree with the remark about need to understand Tourette´s syndrome. However, there is Tourette´s Syndrome, and then there is Tourette´s syndrome...on LSD laced crack.

  • DoubleUFive (unregistered)

    All you Ile are belong to us.

  • (cs)

    Yeah. Well. At least it wasn't pseudo-japanese "otaku".

  • TadGhostal (unregistered) in reply to TSParent
    TSParent:
    ...I see people responding to TS (and TS-type symptoms) with prejudice due to lack of information...

    I prefer to respond to to everything that I lack information about irrationally and with prejudice. It's the only way to stay safe.

  • Anonymous (unregistered) in reply to TSParent
    TSParent:
    Normally, I only quietly read TDWTF, but today hit a nerve. <snipped some rubbish about tourettes>
    You do realise it's all in your head, don't you? Notice how you get that urge to tic, like you have to do it, otherwise something really bad will happen? You could just decide not to tic, but you feel like some terrible thing will happen if you don't. Just like OCD - you don't have to do it but you're such a fuck-up that your brain convinces you that you do. My advice for Tourettes sufferers: just stop doing it you fucking weirdos! There, problem solved.
  • MikeCD (unregistered)

    I hope he had some refactoring tools handy.

  • J.R.R. Trollkien (unregistered) in reply to Anonymous
    Anonymous:
    TSParent:
    Normally, I only quietly read TDWTF, but today hit a nerve. <snipped some rubbish about tourettes>
    You do realise it's all in your head, don't you? Notice how you get that urge to tic, like you have to do it, otherwise something really bad will happen? You could just decide not to tic, but you feel like some terrible thing will happen if you don't. Just like OCD - you don't have to do it but you're such a fuck-up that your brain convinces you that you do. My advice for Tourettes sufferers: just stop doing it you fucking weirdos! There, problem solved.
    Now, for "Tourette's", read "trolling", and then take some of your own advice.

    A made-up language, WoW, elves and trolls -- what's with the fantasy theme?

  • Optimus Dime (unregistered) in reply to Severity One
    Severity One:
    But what I don't get is that, with so many Unix-based systems about, Alex insists on running this site on this rubbish Windows application that more security holes in it than the OS it runs on. Did I mention that you don't pay any license fee for any of that software?
    I didn't realize that Unix-based software had reached the point of sentience...I'd be interested to see the magical routine used to determine that the poster is a spammer even though they still type in the captcha...

    Captcha: sagaciter -

    New brand of fermented apple drink from the folks who brought you Dickin's original....

  • (cs) in reply to My village needs me
    My village needs me:
    OK, I give up, why 9 and 13?
    CR and TAB? It makes much more sense than 1 and 0 if you think about it. NEEEIIIIGGGGHHHHH!!!
  • anonymous_coder() (unregistered)

    C'mon - recaptcha isn't that hard to code. Took more time to convince my boss it worked than to actually jam it into our sites. And it makes the comment spam much harder to pull off...

  • Some Lawyer-wannabe (unregistered) in reply to TSParent
    TSParent:
    "Making animal noises" wasn't the reason the person was fired, and I hope wasn't even one of the reasons they considered firing him.

    Employment "At-Will" means you can be fired for any reason or no reason at any time without prior notice. I'm sure they opted for latter "no reason".

  • luptatum (unregistered) in reply to Anonymous
    Anonymous:
    TSParent:
    Normally, I only quietly read TDWTF, but today hit a nerve. <snipped some rubbish about tourettes>
    You do realise it's all in your head, don't you? Notice how you get that urge to tic, like you have to do it, otherwise something really bad will happen? You could just decide not to tic, but you feel like some terrible thing will happen if you don't. Just like OCD - you don't have to do it but you're such a fuck-up that your brain convinces you that you do. My advice for Tourettes sufferers: just stop doing it you fucking weirdos! There, problem solved.
    Actually, its not a concious urge. You just blurt stuff out without any control of it.
  • Steve the Cynic (unregistered) in reply to Optimus Dime
    Optimus Dime:
    Captcha: sagaciter -

    New brand of fermented apple drink from the folks who brought you Dickin's original....

    If I wanted fermented apple drink, I'd go for the more conventional Weston's, Ecusson, or something like that...

    You know, cider. Proper cider, that is, not the silly stuff they sell west of the Altantic which hasn't even been near yeast.

  • aimy (unregistered)

    I wonder if the neighing was actually some sort of incantation upon the arcane spell he was preparing.

    There's some missing ingredients, no wonder it doesn't work properly. Though things started off well, the budget was not large enough: he was just trying to make gold with what he had (alchemy).

  • RonMexico (unregistered)

    What does a gay horse eat?

    HAAAA-AAAYY!

  • aleph (unregistered) in reply to Optimus Dime
    Optimus Dime:
    Captcha: sagaciter -

    You know, if a spammer were to browse the article comments for instances of "captcha: *", they could just build a dictionary for their OCR software and "crack" the captcha easily enough.

  • (cs) in reply to Steve the Cynic
    Steve the Cynic:
    Optimus Dime:
    Captcha: sagaciter -

    New brand of fermented apple drink from the folks who brought you Dickin's original....

    If I wanted fermented apple drink, I'd go for the more conventional Weston's, Ecusson, or something like that...

    You know, cider. Proper cider, that is, not the silly stuff they sell west of the Altantic which hasn't even been near yeast.

    I realize that by explaining a joke, it is no longer funny, but read this phrase to yourself (and what it would sound like when you say it):

    "There is nothing better than a hot Dickin's Cider."

    To keep the humor (or humour, if you will) alive, "If you add yeast, she's going to get an infection."

  • Sandor (unregistered) in reply to lolwtf
    lolwtf:
    My village needs me:
    OK, I give up, why 9 and 13?
    Because 7 8... er, no...

    I know I use the "spirit" keyword all the time in my code. Very useful.

    well...

    9 mod 3 == 0 == FALSE 13 mod 3 == 1 == TRUE

    no, that is not it

    NOT(9 mod 3) == 1 = TRUE NOT(13 mod 3) == 0 == FALSE

    There, I fail to see what the problem is with using 9 and 13 instead of true and false. It all makes perfect sense to me. However, at the moment i am commited to psychiatric hospital

  • Splork (unregistered) in reply to blah
    blah:
    Fools. They fired the man who is going to revolutionize quantum computing.

    Do re mi fa so la...

    I assume you meant "Do Do Re Mi So"

  • (cs) in reply to TSParent
    TSParent:
    Normally, I only quietly read TDWTF, but today hit a nerve. <snip re: tourettes />

    So your allegation is that the horse-like noises were Tourettes, and not the guy just reading his code aloud?

  • (cs) in reply to Richard
    Richard:
    Anyway, one of his habits was using 9 and 13 instead of TRUE and FALSE. I don't remember how long it took me to figure that out. <<Shudder>>

    Clearly, 9 is composite and 13 is not. Problem solved.

    Or perhaps, 9 is a single digit and 13 is not?

  • Speller (unregistered) in reply to Splork
    Splork:
    blah:
    Fools. They fired the man who is going to revolutionize quantum computing.

    Do re mi fa so la...

    I assume you meant "Do Do Re Mi So"

    Great, here come the TS Spelling Nazis ...

  • (cs) in reply to Sandor
    Sandor:

    well...

    9 mod 3 == 0 == FALSE 13 mod 3 == 1 == TRUE

    no, that is not it

    NOT(9 mod 3) == 1 = TRUE NOT(13 mod 3) == 0 == FALSE

    There, I fail to see what the problem is with using 9 and 13 instead of true and false. It all makes perfect sense to me. However, at the moment i am commited to psychiatric hospital

    Ask for different meds, because it is quite obvious that 9 + 4 == 13, so if we have a value, say x, and we want to test whether it is true or not, all we have to do test x & 4. Simple. Now, the good thing is, you can use bitwise | and & and it still will work, just like with ordinary boolean representations. And of course, you can add them, so 22 can be FILE_NOT_FOUND (easily detected because it is not an odd value). It's just perfect.

  • Patrick (unregistered)

    I got the impression that the "animal noises" he was making were more likely his attempt to read his own code aloud. Some programmers do find that helpful when trying to step through a difficult problem. Only in this case, he was using code that sounded like a constipated horse.

    captcha - conventio (n? convention? as in bad coding __?)

    does that captcha list contain "perfectionis"? that'd be really irritating.

  • FTFY (unregistered) in reply to luptatum
    luptatum:
    Anonymous:
    TSParent:
    Normally, I only quietly read TDWTF, but today hit a nerve. <snipped some rubbish about tourettes>
    You do realise it's all in your head, don't you? Notice how you get that urge to tic, like you have to do it, otherwise something really bad will happen? You could just decide not to tic, but you feel like some terrible thing will happen if you don't. Just like OCD - you don't have to do it but you're such a fuck-up that your brain convinces you that you do. My advice for Tourettes sufferers: just stop doing it you fucking weirdos! There, problem solved.
    Actually, its ARSE not a concious urge. You just blurt FUCK stuff out without BUGGER any control of it.

    FTFY

  • Vilhelm (unregistered) in reply to Anonymous
    Anonymous:
    TSParent:
    Normally, I only quietly read TDWTF, but today hit a nerve. <snipped some rubbish about tourettes>
    You do realise it's all in your head, don't you? Notice how you get that urge to tic, like you have to do it, otherwise something really bad will happen? You could just decide not to tic, but you feel like some terrible thing will happen if you don't. Just like OCD - you don't have to do it but you're such a fuck-up that your brain convinces you that you do. My advice for Tourettes sufferers: just stop doing it you fucking weirdos! There, problem solved.

    That is all well and good until you actually have Tourettes. Trying to force yourself to quick having the twitches is like trying to stop breathing. Go ahead and hold your breath for a few minutes. You can't suffocate yourself by holding your breath because your choice to stop breathing gets overwhelmed by your involuntary instinct to breathe. I can choose to quit twitching, but after a few minutes, my involuntary mind takes over.

  • MisterCheese (unregistered) in reply to TGV
    TGV:
    Sandor:

    well...

    9 mod 3 == 0 == FALSE 13 mod 3 == 1 == TRUE

    no, that is not it

    NOT(9 mod 3) == 1 = TRUE NOT(13 mod 3) == 0 == FALSE

    There, I fail to see what the problem is with using 9 and 13 instead of true and false. It all makes perfect sense to me. However, at the moment i am commited to psychiatric hospital

    Ask for different meds, because it is quite obvious that 9 + 4 == 13, so if we have a value, say x, and we want to test whether it is true or not, all we have to do test x & 4. Simple. Now, the good thing is, you can use bitwise | and & and it still will work, just like with ordinary boolean representations. And of course, you can add them, so 22 can be FILE_NOT_FOUND (easily detected because it is not an odd value). It's just perfect.

    Indeed. It is also very simple to invert: y=11-(x-11)

    I wish all the code I support was written by elves.

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