• (cs) in reply to Watson

    And for the uninitiated... :)

    Guy is driving down the street next to the insane asylum when he gets a flat tire. He takes the wheel off and puts all of the lug nuts in the hub cap. [ed. note: usually considered best practice...] As he's digging the spare out of the trunk, another car comes by, hits the hub cap and scatters the lug nuts everywhere, never to be found.

    As he's standing there trying to figure out what to do, a guy standing inside the asylum fence yells to him, "Hey mister! Take one nut off of each of the other wheels - it will hold the wheel until you get to a repair shop." He tries it, it works, he's very happy. He turns to the guy behind the fence and says, "That was brilliant! How did a smart guy like you end up in the asylum?"

    Watson:
    "I'm crazy, not stupid."
  • Tommy (unregistered)

    OS: windows 98.... apparently it really does make people crazy

  • Iceman (unregistered) in reply to DaveK
    DaveK:
    It already exists: Lyle Zapato's MindGuard has been protecting brains against psyhchotronic influences from aliens, the CIA and Belgium for over a decade now, and it's still going strong.

    http://zapatopi.net/mindguard/

    Being a Belgian, it was very interesting to read that my country doesn't exist http://zapatopi.net/belgium/

    It actually might be true, given all the polical problems we have been having in the past 6 months between the Dutch speaking and French speaking politicians.

  • Sjames (unregistered) in reply to someone
    someone:
    Pat:
    someone:
    Okay, just like pretty much everyone out there I'm a but fuzzy on the actual meaning of these psychological terms, but don't you mean paranoia?

    Apparently, you don't know what the definition of "pretty much everyone" is either. Most folks with an education know what schizophrenia is.

    Hm, I used think I know what the word means. I used to think it's the same as Multiple Personality Disorder, but apparently it isn't.

    Most people THINK they know what schizophrenia and paranoia mean but most of them are wrong.

    Paranoia is often along the lines of "everyone's out to get me", but it really means the person thinks everything relates directly to them in some way. A paranoid might think the city skyline was arranged to look just that way by a conspiracy of architects to give him personally the message that he is destined to greatness. If his commute to work was easy, he might believe someone (even God) arranged for light traffic for his personal benefit.

    The "everyone's out to get me" part can come later to explain why in spite of his great destiny and unseen powerful people on his side he is still working for minimum wage and never gets invited to parties. There has to be something or someone holding him down after all. Logic is not missing in the schizophrenic it's just not working right.

    Anyone sufficiently mindful of their own thoughts will realise that not quite right thoughts happen all the time and are immediatly dismissed by a sort of built-in "bullshit detector". In the schizophrenic, the detector doesn't go off and their beliefs become increasingly convoluted and detached from reality.

  • 3.14159265358 (unregistered) in reply to bstorer
    bstorer:
    i remember one time these very same guys got me with their devious electronic skulduggery. i clicked on a link that PROMISED to take me to a page full of boobies, but instead i went to a picture of a man flaunting his exorbitantly large anus to the camera. i knew there was piezoelectric sonics in the proverbial ether of my Mississippi apartment because there was a strange static on my TV.

    i cannot WAIT for this software to get released.

    I have experienced similar behavior, except that instead of a man's anus, it was some red-headed guy singing about never giving me up. I suspect aliens.

    Same here: I got MeatSpin'd while looking for World of Warcraft cheats.

    I've also been RickRoll'd and Goatse'd. Note: I'm not gay, I don't have a sick fetish, I'm just bored and curious to find out what will disgust or shock me the most.

  • 3.14159265358 (unregistered) in reply to tray
    tray:
    foxyshadis:

    Paranoid Schizos are often more than intelligent enough to get work as scientists and engineers.

    Especially rocket engineers, I heard so. Just keep them away from traffic jams.

    Nowak?

  • (cs)

    I could cure him of the 'evil forces' - install Linux.

  • John (unregistered) in reply to DaveK
    DaveK:
    It already exists: Lyle Zapato's MindGuard has been protecting brains against psyhchotronic influences from aliens, the CIA and Belgium for over a decade now, and it's still going strong.

    http://zapatopi.net/mindguard/

    This mind guard program is a must have. I've been using it for 5 minutes now and already I feel a lot safer. Now I can freely think about things that I would never have dared think about before... :-)

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