• dave (unregistered)

    FRIST!!!!

  • Tim B (unregistered)

    Schizophrenia is a sad disease, although it does generate some amusing content.

  • Elephant (unregistered)

    Amazingly, the project request link is still active; the request is still up.

  • :-X (unregistered)

    Haha, nice.

  • Seb* (unregistered)

    Norton System Doctor can't be wrong.

  • Villa (unregistered) in reply to Elephant

    Not really, the request was canceled on 6/8/2005 3:19:41 PM, shortly after it was posted on this site and Slashdot. Non-action Ratio: Very Good - 0.00% Priceless.

  • Carra (unregistered)

    WTF?

  • Anonymous (unregistered) in reply to dave
    dave:
    FRIST!!!!
    FROST!!!!!!!!!!1111lim->infinity
  • Some Guy (unregistered) in reply to Tim B
    Tim B:
    Schizophrenia is a sad disease, although it does generate some amusing content.

    I'll second that. Wait... you're not spying on me, are you?

  • someone (unregistered) in reply to Tim B
    Tim B:
    Schizophrenia is a sad disease, although it does generate some amusing content.

    Okay, just like pretty much everyone out there I'm a but fuzzy on the actual meaning of these psychological terms, but don't you mean paranoia?

  • Michael Jensen (unregistered) in reply to someone
    someone:
    Tim B:
    Schizophrenia is a sad disease, although it does generate some amusing content.

    Okay, just like pretty much everyone out there I'm a but fuzzy on the actual meaning of these psychological terms, but don't you mean paranoia?

    No, it's not paranoia if they're really after you.

  • Enric Naval (unregistered) in reply to Michael Jensen
    Michael Jensen:
    someone:
    Tim B:
    Schizophrenia is a sad disease, although it does generate some amusing content.

    Okay, just like pretty much everyone out there I'm a but fuzzy on the actual meaning of these psychological terms, but don't you mean paranoia?

    No, it's not paranoia if they're really after you.

    Paranoia:

    "They are after me, how dare you doubt it?"

    Schizophrenia:

    "And they are talking inside my head, too!"

  • Mike O (unregistered)

    Paranoia:

    "They are after me, how dare you doubt it?"

    Schizophrenia:

    "And they are talking inside my head, too!"

    Paranoid Schizophrenia:

    "Talking in my head using modulated radio, ultra-long wave radio, carrier, and piezoelectric sonics to hack my brain!"

  • wesley0042 (unregistered) in reply to dave
    dave:
    FRIST!!!!

    Senator?

  • diaphanein (unregistered) in reply to Mike O
    Mike O:
    Paranoia:

    "They are after me, how dare you doubt it?"

    Schizophrenia:

    "And they are talking inside my head, too!"

    Paranoid Schizophrenia:

    "Talking in my head using modulated radio, ultra-long wave radio, carrier, and piezoelectric sonics to hack my brain!"

    The voices in my head talk to each other...and they don't like you.

  • MAV (unregistered)

    i remember one time these very same guys got me with their devious electronic skulduggery. i clicked on a link that PROMISED to take me to a page full of boobies, but instead i went to a picture of a man flaunting his exorbitantly large anus to the camera. i knew there was piezoelectric sonics in the proverbial ether of my Mississippi apartment because there was a strange static on my TV.

    i cannot WAIT for this software to get released.

  • Matthew P (unregistered) in reply to Mike O

    This is exactly how paranoid schizophrenics behave. My dad has paranoid schizophrenia and doesn't trust any neihbors with satellite dishes because they can use them to take over his brain. Some of his stories can get pretty amusing.

  • FBI (unregistered)

    Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you.

  • E (unregistered)

    This is yet another example as to why there should be an intelligence test before people are allowed to use a computer, or breed.

  • Steve (unregistered)

    Wow. This guy must be important for them to have hacked him over Two Million Times! I've only been hacked about a hundred and fifty thousand times. He'd been hacked once every minute and 20 seconds from the time he installed win 98SE in 1999 to when he posted the request in 2004. I'd be pretty frustrated by that as well.

    also: great video on Schizophrenia

    http://www.theonion.com/content//node/68345?utm_source=embedded_video_2

  • Pat (unregistered) in reply to someone
    someone:
    Okay, just like pretty much everyone out there I'm a but fuzzy on the actual meaning of these psychological terms, but don't you mean paranoia?

    Apparently, you don't know what the definition of "pretty much everyone" is either. Most folks with an education know what schizophrenia is.

  • (cs) in reply to MAV
    i remember one time these very same guys got me with their devious electronic skulduggery. i clicked on a link that PROMISED to take me to a page full of boobies, but instead i went to a picture of a man flaunting his exorbitantly large anus to the camera. i knew there was piezoelectric sonics in the proverbial ether of my Mississippi apartment because there was a strange static on my TV.

    i cannot WAIT for this software to get released.

    I have experienced similar behavior, except that instead of a man's anus, it was some red-headed guy singing about never giving me up. I suspect aliens.

  • (cs) in reply to Pat
    Pat:
    someone:
    Okay, just like pretty much everyone out there I'm a but fuzzy on the actual meaning of these psychological terms, but don't you mean paranoia?

    Apparently, you don't know what the definition of "pretty much everyone" is either. Most folks with an education know what schizophrenia is.

    Do they? Or do they typically confuse it with dissociative identity disorder?

  • (cs) in reply to diaphanein
    diaphanein:
    Mike O:
    Paranoia:

    "They are after me, how dare you doubt it?"

    Schizophrenia:

    "And they are talking inside my head, too!"

    Paranoid Schizophrenia:

    "Talking in my head using modulated radio, ultra-long wave radio, carrier, and piezoelectric sonics to hack my brain!"

    The voices in my head talk to each other...and they don't like you.

    My voices say they've hacked your voices. You should change all your passwords.

  • (cs)

    Sounds like me job used to be at my previous company.

  • BA (unregistered) in reply to bstorer

    Exactly. Schizophrenia is characterized by a distorted sense of reality leading to bizarre delusions. Meaning the first person who tagged this as schizophrenia was on the mark and those who were saying it's "voices in the head" were a bit off.

    Although technically schizophrenia could manifest as voices in the head, it's not the only way it does.

  • The Barefoot Bum (unregistered)
    ... which also happens to be the longest run on sentence ever written...

    You obviously don't read philosophy. Some of those guys, especially the Germans, can write sentences that go on for pages.

  • hamstray (unregistered) in reply to Steve
    Steve:
    Wow. This guy must be important for them to have hacked him over Two Million Times! I've only been hacked about a hundred and fifty thousand times...

    Working for the RIAA perhaps?

  • foxyshadis (unregistered) in reply to E
    E:
    This is yet another example as to why there should be an intelligence test before people are allowed to use a computer, or breed.

    Paranoid Schizos are often more than intelligent enough to get work as scientists and engineers.

  • (cs) in reply to foxyshadis
    foxyshadis:

    Paranoid Schizos are often more than intelligent enough to get work as scientists and engineers.

    Especially rocket engineers, I heard so. Just keep them away from traffic jams.

  • Watson (unregistered)

    I'm just glad the voices in my head speak English.

    -- IM IN UR HEAD READING UR THOUGHTS

  • Watson (unregistered) in reply to E
    E:
    This is yet another example as to why there should be an intelligence test before people are allowed to use a computer, or breed.
    "I'm crazy, not stupid."
  • Malte (unregistered)

    As others have suggested, this is a textbook example of a mental-health problem. While it may appear funny to those who do not recognize it as such, if you understand what this is actually about, it is about as funny as shouting "Haha! You cannot walk!" after a legless man.

  • Daniel (unregistered) in reply to Malte
    Malte:
    As others have suggested, this is a textbook example of a mental-health problem. While it may appear funny to those who do not recognize it as such, if you understand what this is actually about, it is about as funny as shouting "Haha! You cannot walk!" after a legless man.

    Haha! You cannot walk!

  • the most true and accurate (unregistered)

    truth is here http://tedjesuschristgod.org/

  • (cs)

    It already exists: Lyle Zapato's MindGuard has been protecting brains against psyhchotronic influences from aliens, the CIA and Belgium for over a decade now, and it's still going strong.

    http://zapatopi.net/mindguard/

  • someone (unregistered) in reply to Pat
    Pat:
    someone:
    Okay, just like pretty much everyone out there I'm a but fuzzy on the actual meaning of these psychological terms, but don't you mean paranoia?

    Apparently, you don't know what the definition of "pretty much everyone" is either. Most folks with an education know what schizophrenia is.

    Hm, I used think I know what the word means. I used to think it's the same as Multiple Personality Disorder, but apparently it isn't.

    Looking at songs with names like "Schizzos Are Never Alone" or T-Shirts with captions "I'm a schizzo" on the front and "Me too" on the back, it seems to me like I wasn't the only one thinking.

    Maybe you are that much better educated/more intelligent than me and always knew the correct definition of schizophrenia (which is not simple to understand), but then again, maybe you, too, only think you know what it means and never bothered to actually look it up.

  • Tim (unregistered) in reply to Daniel

    Now that's funny.

  • (cs) in reply to dave
    dave:
    FRIST!!!!

    Wow, it's a forum post from 1999

  • parapa the rapper (unregistered) in reply to The Barefoot Bum
    The Barefoot Bum:
    ... which also happens to be the longest run on sentence ever written...

    You obviously don't read philosophy. Some of those guys, especially the Germans, can write sentences that go on for pages.

    Well... i just hate when those guys try to say everything in something like four words: it takes me years to understand the damn thing.

  • David Schwartz (unregistered)

    My favorite was when the aliens were blocking his access to "rentacoder.com" when he obviously mistyped it as "rertacoder.com". That guy is really sad.

  • Hognoxious (unregistered) in reply to Tim B
    Tim B:
    Schizophrenia is a sad disease, although it does generate some amusing content.
    I agree. And for what it's worth, so do I.
  • (cs)

    Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean no one is out to get you!

  • TadGhostal (unregistered) in reply to Malte

    I agree Malte - there are indeed two ways to look at this example. Unfortunately for the subject, most people look at it humorously. The situation is definitely not as funny to him/her as it might be to others. Instead, it is a very real threat that no one else seems to take seriously.

    Always put yourself in the other persons shoes - it affords great insight.

    HOWEVER, I also see the humor, and you have to admit, the end result is funny as shit.

  • Eddy (unregistered)

    No one has posed the question:

    What if he's right?

  • Jay (unregistered) in reply to Enric Naval

    You're just jealous because the voices don't talk to you.

  • david (unregistered)

    Schizophrenia: split affect: response not appropriate to stimulus.

    Syndrome: variable presentation. I would almost say that the only thing all schizophrenics have in common is the condition frightens and torments them, -- except that there are rare people who actually enjoy being schizophrenic.

    Hallucinations (often audio hallucinations: "I hear voices") come in at equal status to other sensations, and are initially rejected by comparison to your learned constructs (No-one is present: the radio is not on: I must have been dreaming). However, the mental image of the real world is constructed from sensory inputs, and eventually it re-adjusts to match a world that generates random messages.

    Paranoia is a common result: I hear voices: everyone else is pretending not hear them. I am tormented: everyone else seems happy. The voices come from somewhere: only my neighbour is near.

    Until the middle of the last century, your mental map might have suffered continued deterioration until you had to be dressed and fed. Drugs introduced in the 50's, initially with quite bad side effects, stopped the hallucinations, and so stopped further deterioration, making it possible to eventually close the holding pens and leave new cases out on the street.

    Schizophrenia is not the only cause of hallucinations, and hallucinations are not the only cause of psychosis. Eventually all failures of the mind start to look the same, like a computer that won't boot. A person my be psychotic because of schizophrenia, depression, recreational drugs. or solitary confinement and brutalization.

    Additionally, all causes may be present: you may be taking recreational drugs because you are depressed because you are schizophrenic. And then they put you in prison.

    The people I have known who were schizophrenic have really, really, really not liked it. I remember a guy I was sharing a house with telling me that he thought he might be God. It didn't bother me, but in retrospect I can see that it was really really really freaking him out. If I had that over again, I'd have gotten him to a doctor. You think crazy people are crazy? Seen from the inside, it's even more crazy.

  • NameNotFoundException (unregistered) in reply to Serpardum
    FBI:
    Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you.
    Serpardum:
    Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean no one is out to get you!

    OMG! George Bool to the rescue! It's: Just because you're NOT paranoid doesn't mean they aren't after you!

    Mindlessly repeating turfwits...

  • nohncids (unregistered)

    Sabotage happens... Couple this with CS ignorance, and you get some funny statements... Doesn't mean he really is paranoid or whatever.

    If this program could be done, sure enough it could be interesting in certain cases. This is not a silly request, but it's normal it's taken as such on a forum like this.

    And this is a good occasion to develop such a program, as it could ease the mind of somebody out there.

  • nohncids (unregistered)

    So.... the REAL WTF is that almost everybody's laughing at him. The uber WTF is that these persons call themselves "intelligent".

Leave a comment on “Classic WTF: Tinfoil Hat Program”

Log In or post as a guest

Replying to comment #:

Log Out

« Return to Article