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Admin
Dear Andrew
Congratulations! You have reached the crisis point in your career in near record time.
Take a look around you.
You have two options:
a) Carry on drifting from non-project to non-project, gradually forgetting everything you ever learned in a pitiful meaningless existence, picking up a barely inflation pay rise annually until you can retire 40 years from now on a mediocre pension and die.
b) Grow a pair and quit.
Since it's taken you six months to anonymously submit some ridicule to a website and you've not managed to pluck up the courage to quit, I suspect you're an ideal candidate for a).
Your best course of action at this point is probably to enroll in a M$ Access course because I have a sneaky suspicion that your next three years will be spent supporting a product on it (and I use the term product loosely).
Good luck and congratulations again!
Admin
People just remember. This job is very important, and when your on my team that's your job all the time.
Admin
If you're a Third-Class Programmer heterosexual male, and if you're smart enough to realize that you're in a meaningless, hopeless job, you'll experience the slow, soul-sucking drain upon your reason to live that these jobs create.
The only way to counter that is to have something to go home to (and no, your level 60 Paladin doesn't count). Between your crappy pay and your $10,000+ yearly gaming/computer habit, you're sure as hell not going to impress the laaadies with stylish clothes and a fast car. And since you're a programmer, you probably can't talk your way out of a cardboard box if there's a girl within 100 feet.
Therefore, your best bet is to latch on to the first girl who can relate to you in any way. If she's also a gamer, there's a bonus because at least she'll understand your $10,000+ yearly gaming/computer habit enough to let you enjoy it from time to time.
I say, go for April, man. And don't give her up even if she lives with thirty seven cats and insists upon calling you "Pumpkin-butt". Just do it! Now! While you still have enough of a will to live to string words into sentences!
Admin
I know mine is. She wasn't much of a gamer girl when I first met her, but I got her converted from tetris to more involved gaming.
Admin
I've never understood all the hate for Pumpkin-butt. (Though here it's more pronounced Punkin-butt). But some people really get peeved about it.
Admin
That doesn't sound like three strikes to me. Sounds more like a triple, I'm hoping for the last one to bring me home.
Admin
Admin
Admin
Hmmmm.
Anybody got an email address to this place so I can place a resume?
Admin
Admin
14:32 <lucid> that worse than failure link is like a condensed version of JPod 14:32 <lucid> minus the drug use and people smuggling
Admin
But that was the best part - Fong the hong kong gangster dance fiend with no verifiable sense of humor.
Admin
As far as hot gamer girls go not only do I date one, but her mom is even more into gaming. (Warcraft, oblivion, Neverwinter nights, Wii, etc)
So in her case gaming is even a genetic trait! W00t!!1! She's a keeper! grin
Admin
If you work contract work at a certain large internet firm, chances are, you'll be assigned to do a bunch of grunt work working on test harnesses that themselves are a WTF because of the lack of error checking (or correct logic) which indicates that your real job is to debug the test utilities to verify that the test results they generate actually mean something, such that you may have a clue as to whether or not the application they're supposed to be used to verify results for is remotely sane.
Or, in other words, guess who gets to write utilities/test harnesses to verify that the utilities/test harnesses show whatever presumably they should show? Yes, that's right: contractors that have the dangling carrot "As long as you make progress, you'll remain here" of perhaps full-time, permanent employment. Mind you, that's when there's something you've currently been assigned to work on available to do.
Needless to say, I've been interviewing elsewhere, as what I'm observing doesn't fill me with a "I want to stay there and retire!" sort of attitude.
Admin
Oh Shit!!
I need a job there, (I haven't read any other posts, and don't expect anyone to read this) But it sounds like my perfect role. No work, surrounded by people who think no work is hard work. (I'm getting upset as I'm listening to the 'Lost' soundtrack.)
Please let me know where to send my CV.
Thanks, Captcha:- craaazy (and I'm registered, whats with the captcha???)
Admin
...especially if you're a balding, 42-year-old male middle manager.
Admin
Wait... does that mean I'm really a third rate programmer and never realized it?
Admin
Bah - forgot the quote on the previous comment, so I blew up the joke. :) Just put this comment in front of the other one.
Admin
Bah - forgot the quote on the previous comment, so I blew up the joke. :) Just put this comment in front of the other one.
Admin
Too small. Middle managers demand some serious muzzle energy to stop effectively.
Admin
You mean absolutely Paula.
Admin
Hilarious!! Love the "Repo" punchline!
Admin
I dunno, 9mm hollowpoint stops most anyone.
Admin
wow, definitely wtf heaven as stated before. gimme job like this, please!
Chaptcha: pointer (Alex, its time for sum C/C++ SODs)
Admin
I have worked in exactly such a position.. It was pretty fun for a time, we didn't have to do anything (or even turn up a lot of the time) and spent all day playing games and watching videos online.
It was a very small IT team for a large company, but all of the actual 'software' was written by non-developers in various departments using Access and Excel.
Like I said.. fun for a time, but you can't do it forever.
Admin
WOW!
Admin
...Where do we find you, as a collective?
Admin
http://hotgamerchicks.com, of course!
(if there isn't one now, I can see that being created soon: after all, there's worsethanfailure.com, right???)
Admin
Since when isn't this all programming roles?? The only thing that distinguishes the good from the bad is the good are able to use this time effectively to pursue their own projects and can sucker managers into higher paying roles. The bad simple idle in this position for their entire lives.
Admin
I'm actually relieved by this article. At least I get to make real things which are actually used, and my code has improved greatly since I started.
Admin
wrong! emocamgirls.com is where all the action is
Admin
I am a developer myself, and I interview people for developer jobs all the time. A person who would say they were TCBing for 3 years and would not be able to explain a single project will get a no-hire. Of course, you can always make up a project, but you need to be really good at it, or you will be caught.
In my book if you could describe your fake experience so well that no one caught you, it counts almost as high as if you had the real experience. But not everyone is so forgiving :-)
Admin
The first person to register that domain and put some content up is going to get a sizeable captive audience of desperate male nerds ...
Admin
I got my wife playing UT for a while. She's definitely hot, but she's also definitely not a gamer, despite the UT sessions. The main reason she liked it was because she could order the bots around, which actually says a lot about her... :)
After she started playing UT, we were playing some chess. At one point, she'd started owning me pretty seriously, and after the sixth captured piece in a row, she mustered up the deepest voice she could manage, and boomed, "KILLING SPREE!"
Keeper all right!
Admin
Get an admin job at a University! Seriously.
Admin
I'm currently in a job like this. And I've been in it for 10 years (I'm 30 now).
The sad thing is that it wasn't like this when I began working there. We had lots and lots of interesting stuff to do. Things went down in such a slow pace no one noticed. Now, looking back, I cannot think of myself as anything but a loser. Even the abilities I had 10 years ago are almost gone...
If you were in my position, what would you do to solve this? Mind you, I have some huge debts that I must pay, so quitting this job right now isn't an option.
Since this is (or will be) a restart from zero, any suggestion is most welcome.
Admin
Exactly what I do at my "job" right now.
You're welcome to it if you can stand it.
Admin
Passion. You need passion for what you do in life. If your just going to work to make a paycheck to pay off some debt, then that is all you are! Do you love what you do? If not, it is time to move on. I have never heard of this 'Third-class Programmer' thing. The closest that I came was a company that I worked at for a year, and I saw that the lack of accomplishment made me find something new. Nothing close to what is described here through. Strange thing though is how can you come to a site like this? Is this your first time here? This site is dedicated to showcasing what you are! We, who come to this site and have to debug, and maintain stuff that comes from uninspired programmmers and are coming here for relief, a sholder to cry on. We want to see that there are other programmers who find code that is WTF (The original definition), and make sure that our stories of crap code are not any different from anyone elses! Is this your first time here, or do you contribute the code that is offered here? Are your a voyeur? Do you like watching everyone here with there war stories complain? If you are coming here regularly AND you are the 'Third-Class Programmer', then what are your doing with your life? You need passion in what you do in life. If you hit the snooze alarm every morning, time and time again, your not in the right place. Good luck.
Admin
Yeah i used to do that. I wasn't even employed as a programmer har har har.
Admin
So, after week of doing nothing he didn't decide to go and look for work? It had to take about 5 months before he saw code? He didn't run out screaming and weeping his eyes out when the ASP guy told about his knowledge (or rather lack thereof) of ASP?... He deserves to be in this purgatory. The real WTF is that he worked there more than 2 weeks, no mercy... suffer and keel over.
Admin
Ask yourself what you want to do, and learn new skills in that area. It needn't be an area in which you are working (for lack of a better word) now, or even be neighboring (pun intended) to that. Learn in your spare time, if you really want to get out of the slum you'll want to invest this time.
Admin
you played games at work ?!?!? fark me i want
Admin
you're right. I've never had a job where I can do anything I wanted to as long as I was working on a computer.
Admin
...reminds me of that Dilbert comic where Phill (ruler of Heck) offers one of two choices: work for near nothing but have your work be meaningful, or get paid well and have all your work burned in front of you.
Of course, everyone wanted to get in on it because it was better than their current gig.
Seems true today as well when it was done in the 90s.
Side note: Another plus about gamer chick: If she is willing to get shot in the face for social approval from her clan, she's probably pretty open to suggestions in the sack...could be interesting.
Admin
Last job I had like that I managed to 'aquire' a server to play with and used that to build apps, websites, configure new mail servers. Very few were ever used, but at least I could do something with my time.
Kept me going through the endless days of being told by my boss to not respond to quick to support queries, or to take my time when coding.
Admin
My job has also been like this, but kind of off and on for ages.
I once spent about 6 months "studying .net" cos there wasn't much else to do. I used the time to write a book.
Then I got to do some cool stuff for a month or so, then loads more not doing much. There's been several rounds of redundancies and a company take-over in which many people have gone (i.e. we're down to 13 from about 50). And I'm still here. It amazes me sometimes.
Still, there's a new project heading my way now, and I was going to start some coding today. But I think I might wait till next week. I've got used to this surfing the web all day business.
Admin
Use the time to build your skill set. Find some interesting new technology to learn, create your own pet project or (better) contribute to an open source project. Set your own schedule.
If you achieve anything noteworthy that way, you won't even have to lie about it in future job interviews. Any manager with half a brain will realize that if you could (without any external pressure) motivate yourself to do something worthwhile in the right field when you could instead have goofed off, you're a more valuable employee than 90% out there.
Admin
What's wrong with that? Lots of people have pictures of their kids/spouse in their wallet.
Whatever floats your boat, mate.
Admin
Aah. Memories of a six month stint at head office come to mind. The highlight of the period was the day the jnr. assistant dba was able to fly a paper plane over the roof of the two story building we were housed in. The rest of the team was not as successful during the challenge. The project manager sulked for a week.
Admin
Employee = first class? On what planet? True, some employees are useful, but only because they've been around long enough to actually know what the business is trying to accomplish. Most employees, and most contractors, are exactly as useful as the people in the story. IT is a lot like Adult Day Care. 5% of the people do 95% of the work, and everyone else's job is just "don't to screw it up."