• (cs) in reply to Jamoche
    Jamoche:
    C-Octothorpe:
    Jamoche:
    Ever since being hired, Adam had spent most of his time working on new projects.

    Please. You expect me to believe a wtf-worthy company puts new hires on new projects?

    I missed the part of the storey where it said Adam was a junior developer.

    Q: You have ten years of experience and get hired at a new company. How many years of experience do you have?

    a) Ten years b) Zero

    I missed the part of my comment where I said he was junior.
    If it wasn't implied by your "ZOMG!!1! why put n00bs on good projects?!" comment, then please accept my apologies.

  • gloin (unregistered)

    To be honest, this could come straight from the Linux kernel tree. Don't believe me? Go to http://lxr.linux.no/#linux+v3.2.5/ and search for any of the swear words given above. My personal favorite though is "on fire"

  • (cs) in reply to ekolis
    ekolis:
    Speaking of Australian slang, do you have any idea what the heck "bloody fruit-shop owner" is supposed to mean? The sniper in Team Fortress 2 is always saying that, and I have no idea what it means... my best guess is "operator of a gay brothel"...
    Apparently "It's a reference to an infamous incident in Australia, when a disgruntled man with a sniper rifle targeted fruit shops. It was quite tragic" according to someone on a TF2 forum, "Its not an insult" he adds.
  • Paul Neumann (unregistered) in reply to Jamoche
    Jamoche:
    I missed the part of my comment where I said he was junior.
    You missed part of your own comment?! How does that happen?
  • Jack (unregistered) in reply to Paul Neumann
    Paul Neumann:
    Jamoche:
    I missed the part of my comment where I said he was junior.
    You missed part of your own comment?! How does that happen?
    It was a bug in an overly complicated function to return a boolean indicating whether one's own comment has been proofread before posting.
  • Paul Neumann (unregistered) in reply to Jack
    Jack:
    Paul Neumann:
    Jamoche:
    I missed the part of my comment where I said he was junior.
    You missed part of your own comment?! How does that happen?
    It was a bug in an overly complicated function to return a boolean indicating whether one's own comment has been proofread before posting.
    Of course, the old File Not Found option.
  • (cs) in reply to FuBar
    FuBar:
    Anon:
    It is supposedly self abuse as in the strict word of the bible it is a sin.
    Um, no it's not. You'll never find a chapter and verse to back your claim. Wearing blended fabrics, though, THAT is a sin! Deuteronomy 22:11.
    It is safe to say that this falls under the category of 'sexual immorality' which there are plenty of verses on that topic. But if you want a short to the point chapter and verse on it: 1 Corinthian 6-18a: "Flee sexual immmorality."
  • God Save The Queen! Whatwhat! (unregistered) in reply to Not Steve The Cynic
    Not Steve The Cynic:
    Steve The Cynic:
    It might well be accurate about the sexual proclivities of those who gave orders (for those who don't know: "wanker" is British slang for one who commits self-abuse)…
    Curiously enough, in Aussie english, it is the term used for male masturbation. Many people don't call that self-abuse… Is self-abuse itself a British euphemism for masturbation?
    In the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, the accepted euphemism for the slang term "wanker" is "someone who pleasures himself".

    Thus the term "self-abuse" must be an Americanism.

    For some reason several of those colonies consider masturbation something to be avoided. They did rather hang on to a lot of those Puritan concepts.

    One does have difficulty in ascertaining exactly what is meant by the term "fucking wanker", as "fucking" involves another person while "wanking" patently does not.

    Perhaps someone versed in 'street' could provide some enlightenment on that detail?

  • Nagesh (unregistered) in reply to Anketam
    Anketam:
    FuBar:
    Anon:
    It is supposedly self abuse as in the strict word of the bible it is a sin.
    Um, no it's not. You'll never find a chapter and verse to back your claim. Wearing blended fabrics, though, THAT is a sin! Deuteronomy 22:11.
    It is safe to say that this falls under the category of 'sexual immorality' which there are plenty of verses on that topic. But if you want a short to the point chapter and verse on it: 1 Corinthian 6-18a: "Flee sexual immmorality."
    I am no excepting Bible authority on this mater. Veda is more clean on what do do in these cases.
  • God (unregistered) in reply to Anketam
    Anketam:
    It is safe to say that this falls under the category of 'sexual immortality' which there are plenty of verses on that topic. But if you want a short to the point chapter and verse on it: 1 Corinthian 6-18a: "Flee sexual immmortality."
    FTFY. Not sure why everyone always gets this wrong.
  • (cs)

    The shocking part is that that method isn't written in VB.

  • FuBar (unregistered) in reply to Anketam
    Anketam:
    FuBar:
    Anon:
    It is supposedly self abuse as in the strict word of the bible it is a sin.
    Um, no it's not. You'll never find a chapter and verse to back your claim. Wearing blended fabrics, though, THAT is a sin! Deuteronomy 22:11.
    It is safe to say that this falls under the category of 'sexual immorality' which there are plenty of verses on that topic.
    Um, no. "Sexual immorality" is culturally defined. It's not defined in the Bible; they were writing for their own time and culture and simply assumed their readers shared the same definitions. Definitions have now changed. The closest you're going to come to something like a definition are the O.T. laws, which are silent about masturbation but do reject, very clearly and explicitly, wearing blended fabrics (wool+linen), as well as intercourse during menstruation and a bunch of other things, on the grounds of religious purity.
  • (cs) in reply to FuBar
    FuBar:
    Anon:
    It is supposedly self abuse as in the strict word of the bible it is a sin.
    Um, no it's not. You'll never find a chapter and verse to back your claim. Wearing blended fabrics, though, THAT is a sin! Deuteronomy 22:11.
    5. At a certain Bible camp I was forced kicking and screaming to attend, we were told jacking it is okay as long as we weren't "lusting".
  • (cs) in reply to FuBar
    FuBar:
    ...as well as intercourse during menstruation ...
    But cunnilingus is still okay, right?
  • (cs)

    Apparently zunesis has the day off.

  • Translations, translations (unregistered) in reply to Anketam
    Anketam:
    FuBar:
    Anon:
    It is supposedly self abuse as in the strict word of the bible it is a sin.
    Um, no it's not. You'll never find a chapter and verse to back your claim. Wearing blended fabrics, though, THAT is a sin! Deuteronomy 22:11.
    It is safe to say that this falls under the category of 'sexual immorality' which there are plenty of verses on that topic. But if you want a short to the point chapter and verse on it: 1 Corinthian 6-18a: "Flee sexual immmorality."
    Seeing as you're using the NIV translation, what is "Sexual Immorality"?

    The King James translation uses the word "fornication" in this passage, which is consensual sex outside marriage, usually considered to be with a prostitute. The 1550 Stephanus Greek version agrees - unfortunately I couldn't find an original Greek text (mostly because there aren't any, it's all Chinese whispers by now)

    So masturbate all you like, but avoid sex with prostitutes!

  • (cs) in reply to Translations, translations
    Translations:
    So masturbate all you like, but avoid sex with prostitutes!
    This is especially true on Revolucion street in Tijuana.
  • Translations, translations (unregistered) in reply to Translations, translations
    Translations:
    So masturbate all you like, but avoid sex with prostitutes!
    What I forgot to mention is that the Greek word for masturbation - "malaka" - is not used in the 1550 text.
  • FuBar (unregistered) in reply to hoodaticus
    hoodaticus:
    FuBar:
    ...as well as intercourse during menstruation ...
    But cunnilingus is still okay, right?
    Absolutely, at any time of the month. And if you're a lesbian, don't worry - there is absolutely no prohibition of lesbian activity anywhere in the Bible.

    Ah, but what about Romans 1:26, you say? Two problems. 1) all it says is "contrary to nature" - define that, especially when ewes mount ewes and cows mount cows in the animal world all the time. 2) Start reading at v. 24 and you will see that the sexual activity the writer despises is not the CAUSE of anything, but the PUNISHMENT for worshiping false gods. Yep, you read it in Romans 1. St. Paul found the "root cause" of male homosexuality and other things he didn't like: Worshiping idols! Finally, that's settled. The psychologists and sociologists can relax.

    Romans chapters 1 to 3 need to be read all together as a carefully constructed argument, albeit one that would convince no one today. If you take these points out of context it just gets silly.

  • anony (unregistered)

    Gen 38:8-10

    http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis+38%3A8-10&version=NIV

    While condoning sleeping with your brothers wife admonishes spilling seman on the ground. The term onanism is used to refer to the sin of masturbating with direct reference to this verse.

    I guess it could be argued the true sin here was Onan not fulfilling his "brotherly duties" of getting his sister in law knocked up.

  • (cs) in reply to FuBar
    FuBar:
    hoodaticus:
    FuBar:
    ...as well as intercourse during menstruation ...
    But cunnilingus is still okay, right?
    Absolutely, at any time of the month. And if you're a lesbian, don't worry - there is absolutely no prohibition of lesbian activity anywhere in the Bible.

    Ah, but what about Romans 1:26, you say? Two problems. 1) all it says is "contrary to nature" - define that, especially when ewes mount ewes and cows mount cows in the animal world all the time. 2) Start reading at v. 24 and you will see that the sexual activity the writer despises is not the CAUSE of anything, but the PUNISHMENT for worshiping false gods. Yep, you read it in Romans 1. St. Paul found the "root cause" of male homosexuality and other things he didn't like: Worshiping idols! Finally, that's settled. The psychologists and sociologists can relax.

    Romans chapters 1 to 3 need to be read all together as a carefully constructed argument, albeit one that would convince no one today. If you take these points out of context it just gets silly.

    I'm pretty sure the NT is totally laissez faire with all forms of sexual activity as long as it involves two people of opposite sex, married to each other, not in view of the public. She can mount him for all the Bible cares as long as they're married.
  • (cs) in reply to anony
    anony:
    Gen 38:8-10

    http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis+38%3A8-10&version=NIV

    While condoning sleeping with your brothers wife admonishes spilling seman on the ground. The term onanism is used to refer to the sin of masturbating with direct reference to this verse.

    I guess it could be argued the true sin here was Onan not fulfilling his "brotherly duties" of getting his sister in law knocked up.

    Onanism refers to jacking it. The sin Onan committed was flat out disobedience to what he knew to be a divine order to give her his hot beef injection.

  • (cs) in reply to hoodaticus

    And I believe the motivation for said divine decree was that said hot beef injection produced an ancestor of Jesus.

  • George (unregistered) in reply to God Save The Queen! Whatwhat!
    God Save The Queen! Whatwhat!:
    Not Steve The Cynic:
    Steve The Cynic:
    It might well be accurate about the sexual proclivities of those who gave orders (for those who don't know: "wanker" is British slang for one who commits self-abuse)…
    Curiously enough, in Aussie english, it is the term used for male masturbation. Many people don't call that self-abuse… Is self-abuse itself a British euphemism for masturbation?
    In the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, the accepted euphemism for the slang term "wanker" is "someone who pleasures himself".

    Thus the term "self-abuse" must be an Americanism.

    For some reason several of those colonies consider masturbation something to be avoided. They did rather hang on to a lot of those Puritan concepts.

    One does have difficulty in ascertaining exactly what is meant by the term "fucking wanker", as "fucking" involves another person while "wanking" patently does not.

    Perhaps someone versed in 'street' could provide some enlightenment on that detail?

    I should think it's obvious that Fucking and Wanking are not mutually exclusive, thus one does not have to be solely a fucker or solely a wanker.

    [Off Topic, but related to differences between American and Australian] I heard on the news this morning stuff about that sport you call football, but noone ever seems to kick it. There was a quote from one of the guys who must have done something impressive (how they can tell who it was under so much protection is beyond me) who talked about how wonderful it was to be there when all of the supporters were rooting him.

    Over here we have massive scandals when footballers (of the Rugby League or Australian Rules varieties in particular) are rooted by supporters.

  • Mickey (unregistered) in reply to hoodaticus
    hoodaticus:
    FuBar:
    Anon:
    It is supposedly self abuse as in the strict word of the bible it is a sin.
    Um, no it's not. You'll never find a chapter and verse to back your claim. Wearing blended fabrics, though, THAT is a sin! Deuteronomy 22:11.
    5. At a certain Bible camp I was forced kicking and screaming to attend, we were told jacking it is okay as long as we weren't "lusting".
    Wow, that would be along wank!
  • Mickey (unregistered) in reply to Translations, translations
    Translations:
    Translations:
    So masturbate all you like, but avoid sex with prostitutes!
    What I forgot to mention is that the Greek word for masturbation - "malaka" - is not used in the 1550 text.
    I think I just worked out what "Pusti Malaka" means, and I now have to go bash some geeks....OOps, GREEKS
  • (cs) in reply to George
    George:
    Over here we have massive scandals when footballers (of the Rugby League or Australian Rules varieties in particular) are rooted by supporters.
    You should try listening to American football sportscasters. Scan for objectively homo-erotic language, and you will blush and perhaps vomit.

    I cannot tell you how many times I've heard a sportscaster say things like "he came right in his face". There's a radio program here in Charlotte that makes fun of it every day of football season.

  • (cs) in reply to Mickey
    Mickey:
    hoodaticus:
    FuBar:
    Anon:
    It is supposedly self abuse as in the strict word of the bible it is a sin.
    Um, no it's not. You'll never find a chapter and verse to back your claim. Wearing blended fabrics, though, THAT is a sin! Deuteronomy 22:11.
    5. At a certain Bible camp I was forced kicking and screaming to attend, we were told jacking it is okay as long as we weren't "lusting".
    Wow, that would be along wank!
    Especially first thing in the morning.
  • Jamoche (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe

    The seriously wtf-worthy companies I've worked at tend to look at experienced people and say "ooh, 10 years ago you worked on Cobol? We've got some ancient Cobol that needs fixing! You'll be perfect!"

    Which is why there are some things I'm careful to leave off my resume.

  • FuBar (unregistered) in reply to anony
    anony:
    I guess it could be argued the true sin here was Onan not fulfilling his "brotherly duties" of getting his sister in law knocked up.
    Yup. He wasn't wanking, he was practicing coitus interruptus. This was bad because it was his religious and social duty to knock up his elder brother's widow.
  • (cs) in reply to Anketam
    Anketam:
    FuBar:
    Anon:
    It is supposedly self abuse as in the strict word of the bible it is a sin.
    Um, no it's not. You'll never find a chapter and verse to back your claim. Wearing blended fabrics, though, THAT is a sin! Deuteronomy 22:11.
    It is safe to say that this falls under the category of 'sexual immorality' which there are plenty of verses on that topic. But if you want a short to the point chapter and verse on it: 1 Corinthian 6-18a: "Flee sexual immmorality."

    Not to forget the term "onanism". Supposedly derived from the sin that Onan indulged in, which was actually coitus interruptus (deliberately not getting his wife pregnant because as she was his (elder?) brother's widow, his offspring would not be his own, but his brother's). Jehovah quite justifiably struck him down for spilling his dirty water all over the bedsheets - but the cause for the latter was not because he used his hands to stimulate himself to that climax, but his wife's cunt. According to Jehovah, then, the real sin is making a wet patch.

  • (cs) in reply to FuBar
    FuBar:
    anony:
    I guess it could be argued the true sin here was Onan not fulfilling his "brotherly duties" of getting his sister in law knocked up.
    Yup. He wasn't wanking, he was practicing coitus interruptus. This was bad because it was his religious and social duty to knock up his elder brother's widow.

    Oh bollocks. Oh, freshly emptied bollocks. That'll teach me to post before reading all the other comments. Fucking arseholes.

  • (cs)

    LOL, excellent. Reminds me of the time I peeked at some old code for a system and found that the names of the servers involved in the processes were the swear words.

  • JJ (unregistered) in reply to FuBar
    The Article:
    He was aware that there was an "old system" running out there and would someday be shut down [...]
    Adam was going to be shut down? Harsh.
  • (cs) in reply to Translations, translations
    Translations:
    Translations:
    So masturbate all you like, but avoid sex with prostitutes!
    What I forgot to mention is that the Greek word for masturbation - "malaka" - is not used in the 1550 text.
    "Masturbation" derives from an earlier word "manustupration", from Latin manus ("hand") + stupro ("debauch"). So that tells you.
  • FuBar (unregistered) in reply to Matt Westwood
    Matt Westwood:
    Oh bollocks. Oh, freshly emptied bollocks. That'll teach me to post before reading all the other comments. Fucking arseholes.
    That's OK. The truth can afford to be told twice. Especially when it's told so colorfully.
  • bbo (unregistered)

    dirty language, admitted... if the story is real it does not compile

  • Andre (unregistered) in reply to Hand Wringer

    Actually, this site's name is The Daily Worst Than Failure...

  • Evrt (unregistered)

    What java-looking code allows dashes in identifiers?

  • (cs) in reply to hoodaticus
    hoodaticus:
    George:
    Over here we have massive scandals when footballers (of the Rugby League or Australian Rules varieties in particular) are rooted by supporters.
    You should try listening to American football sportscasters. Scan for objectively homo-erotic language, and you will blush and perhaps vomit.

    I cannot tell you how many times I've heard a sportscaster say things like "he came right in his face". There's a radio program here in Charlotte that makes fun of it every day of football season.

    It's not just football. My brother went through a brief phase where he was riding motocross. After every event, he came home bragging "I blew 'em in the weeds!"

  • Worf (unregistered) in reply to gloin
    gloin:
    To be honest, this could come straight from the Linux kernel tree. Don't believe me? Go to http://lxr.linux.no/#linux+v3.2.5/ and search for any of the swear words given above. My personal favorite though is "on fire"

    That was a signal back from the printer, actually. Probably made for one of those massive printers that can run through miles of paper every minutes. Paper dust accumulates, and all it takes is a little bit of heat from a not-so-well-lubricated roller and boom, it's on fire.

    Sure it takes 451F to ignite paper, and I'm sure a little bit of binding in the paper path and paper dust can easily get it up that high. (especially if it's running through at miles per hour).

    Anketam:
    Ec the College Student:
    Hand Wringer:
    I am shocked, shocked I tell you, to encounter this kind of juvenile language on The Daily What-The-...

    Oh, never mind.

    No, no, it's the Daily Worse Than Failure! ;)
    Right...

    You keep telling yourself that.

    What, it's Worse-Than-Frak ?

  • (cs) in reply to PlayHideAndGoF$%^Yourself
    PlayHideAndGoF$%^Yourself:
    Coding in TourettesScript

    This.

    (Also, this: http://i.imgur.com/kXuYR.jpg)

  • moreON (unregistered) in reply to Hand Wringer
    Hand Wringer:
    I am shocked, shocked I tell you, to encounter this kind of juvenile language on The Daily What-The-...

    Oh, never mind.

    WTF has always meant worse than failure for this site. You just have misguided preconceptions.

  • Jimbob The Mighty (unregistered) in reply to Hand Wringer

    You mean, the Daily Worse Than Failure...

  • fck-nagesh (unregistered) in reply to Nagesh
    Nagesh:
    wbrianwhite:
    Is this a real example of the fuckhead pattern?

    http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/Are-You-Cool,-Man-and-More.aspx

    Why does Askimet think a link to this same site is spam? Un-fuck your code Askimet, you wankers.

    Making fun of Indian is not being funy.

    Why the fuck do you think that it's making fun of Indians!! Grow up fuckhead!!

  • refref (unregistered)

    I think some refucktoring could solve the dillema.

  • Kasper (unregistered)
    how does one document something that is not safe for work?
    You can always perform the clbuttic search and replace.
  • Nuelo (unregistered) in reply to hoodaticus

    Just make sure you use a straw.

  • Nuelo (unregistered) in reply to hoodaticus
    hoodaticus:
    FuBar:
    ...as well as intercourse during menstruation ...
    But cunnilingus is still okay, right?

    Just make sure you use a straw.

  • Tim Rowe (unregistered) in reply to Steve The Cynic
    Steve The Cynic:
    Actually, it's commonly cited as a Roman Catholic euphemism for masturbation. The British euphemism is "wanking".
    That's hardly a euphemism. Euphemisms for it include bashing the bishop, shaking hands with the wife's best friend, and DIY.

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