Jake Vinson

Jun 2009

A Systematic Approach

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It was the early 1990s and Frank was living the dream – unshaven, in pajama bottoms and his favorite hockey jersey, having just woken up at 12:18 PM, was now working in the dim light of his basement on one of his freelance projects. Just as he was sipping a cup of coffee, the phone rang.

Frank tried fruitlessly to fight an unexpected open-mouthed yawn when he picked up the receiver. "OOOOAAAaaahhhh... hello?"


Yesterday's Function, Today's Form

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credit: duesentrieb @ flickr Chest puffed out and walking absurdly fast, Dietrich called out various rooms as they passed. "Built in the 70s, you'll find our building is an absolutely stunning marvel – processing room! – of modern architecture. Top to bottom, function has – restroom! – dictated the form. You'll find no unnecessary extravagences – another restroom! – within these walls." His heels clicked and echoed as he led Chris S. and another fresh-faced recruit on the grand tour of RNTP's corporate building.

Chris had been trying to get a word in, and seized the opportunity as soon as he could. "Wow, this building is hu-"


It's the Only Way to be Sure

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WHY?! "Support ain't gonna be no big deal," Scott B.'s boss told him, "it's a weighbridge fer cryin' out loud! They don't got no movin' parts and they ain't gonna go breakin' in the middl'a the night."

Scott found the conversation reassuring. While he was happy to help his company expand into the business of selling and managing weighbridges, he was reticent to commit to 24x7 for emergency support, especially when support meant possible on-site visits within a fifty mile radius. But the boss was right, it's a weighbridge — truck moves on, weight slip prints out, truck moves off — it don't get no simpler than that.


Hell Hath No Fury

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"Stu-dennnt!" Bill called out for Gary with the level of respect Gary had become accustomed to, in a tone not unlike Superintendent Chalmers's calling for Principal Skinner. "Is this... decaf‽"

Gary had grown numb to the lack of respect. He used to remind himself that this was his first job out of college, that he'd eventually earn Bill's respect, that if he just kept his chin up and proved himself then someday Bill would treat him like an equal. Over time, that inner voice gave up.