Ever since the first Free Sticker Week ended back in February '07, I've been sending out WTF Stickers to anyone that mailed me a SASE or a small souvenir. Nothing specific; per the instructions page, "anything will do." Well, here goes anything, yet again! (previous: Makin' It Fit).

"I recently came across a rather immense in-store credit at BJ's Wholesale," wrote Steve "snoofle" W. (Mattawan, NJ). "Since I usually manage to lose credit slips before I get a chance to use them, I decided to burn through it. After as much back-to-school shopping as is possible there, I wandered the canyons of the warehouse and happened upon the candy aisle. Normally, I'd pass it by, as none of us have any willpower, but then I thought about Alex's dire lunch situation, and figured this would help."

This picture doesn't nearly do this obscene amount of candy justice. There is so much good candy here -- literally, a crapton of it -- that I had to resort to the immediately-available cellphone camera. Had I hoarded the goodies until I brought in a real camera, I would have certainly had a mutiny to deal with. Here's what the candy looks like piled on the conference table with me, of course, enthralled by the loot.

Trying to calculate how much weight I'd gain from having this around, I looked at the nutritional information to see how many calories I'd be in for:

--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--
                       CALORIES
120 Variety Pack         10,650
Hershey's Kisses          8,200
M&M's                     8,780
Recee's Minis             9,240
Mars Mix                  8,190
Tootsie Rolls             8,120

TOTAL                    52,380
--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--

Calories Per Pound: 3,500
Calories Per Mile:  100 (approx)

--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--

Distance Per Crapton of Candy:

Fortunately, I do have coworkers eager to share in the goodies. Still, I anticipate needing to walk to at least Detroit to undo my share.

 

Jere P. (Helsinki, Finland) wrote, "This somewhat awkward Operaman t-shirt comes from the good ole' days of Opera's marketing, where their strategy consisted of dressing up one of their employees and a superman suit and the notorious promise by their CEO to swim from Norway to the USA. As for the USB drive, it's a whopping 16MB and filled with random garbage."

 

Danny Cooper (Hooks, Texas) learned the hard way why some custom mouse pads cost $0.10/each and others are $1.10/each. Too embarrassing to give out as trade-show swag, he sent in a small stack for some WTF Stickers. "You'll find they're one step up from colored Saran wrap," he added, "most paper towels are thicker, though."


(Aspose is a TDWTF sponsor; they're also TDWTF readers)

 

"At my last job," wrote David Henkel-Wallace (Palo Alto, CA), "if someone saw the 'radioactive' tape in the wrong place, life would suddenly become... exciting. There would also be a lot of paperwork to fill out." I look forward to using the tape for its intended purpose.

 

Alfonso Via-Reque (Woodridge, IL) send these racing cards from the turn of the century (wait, is it too early to say that?).

 

"Here are a couple ancient PCMCIA cards I found at the office," Joose K. (Finland) noted, "I was going to pitch 'em, but figured they'd be a fun souvenir." Indeed they are, Joose; and they even taste better than Salmiak.

 

Paul Gibbs (Brantford, Ontario) sent this random assortment of Canadian stuff.

 

Followed by Mark Cottman-Fields (St. Lucia, Australia) who sent this random assortment of Austrialian stuff.

 

I'm surprised that Ethan Schwartz's (Auburndale, MA) office still has these stickers around. They're almost as dangerous as a slow-reacting disintegrating-ray gun. Slap one on the chair in your coworker's cube: BAM, he's seatless by morning. Stick one on a photo frame: BAM, bye-bye picture. They're also a step up from the "Kick Me" sign.

 

McLaughlin Thomas (Kennewick, WA) sent, quite possibly, the coolest currency I've ever seen. Serious business: it's got see-thru parts, lots of colors, big numbers, different-sized bills, and a bearded dude.

 

Jonas (Denmark) sent this laptop bag and delightfully tasty candy.

 

And finally, here's a random assortment of souvenirs from different readers across the world.

 

Don't forget to snail-mail in your own souvenirs for some TDWTF stickers. Ultra-awesome souvenirs (like, say, mounds of candy... except, don't actually send in mounds of candy, since I'll have enough to last a lifetime fiscal quarter) could even get you a TDWTF mug.

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