• Anon (unregistered)
    Take, for example, that little paintbrush-looking button in Excel. Did you know it's called the “Format Painter” and can magically copy/paste cell formatting? Did you even know it was there?

    Yes, thank you. Actually, I usually use it in Word all the time because the formatting on the templates we use for reports is all f'ed up and the only way to get it be consistent is by format painting the bits that look right into the bits that don't.

  • sponk (unregistered)

    That was a really exciting story.

  • anonymouse (unregistered)

    One can always call on TDWTF readers to post first. It's almost the same thing as posting content, really.

  • Real-modo (unregistered)

    My parents had a problem with a spreadsheet my sister set up for them, and they asked me for help.

    I _____________________ and now they ___________.

  • (cs)

    My solution would be to say, "You need to roll 24Z back to its previous formula."

  • Expert-at-all-things-Excel (unregistered)

    The real reason that cell's formula didn't work was "IIF".

    No, wait, that's why the story didn't work.

    I guess I'm jaded, but that formula didn't quite rise to the complexity level needed to merit a true WTF. Hideous, botchy, nightmare-inducing, but par for the Excel course actually.

    CAPTCHA: ingenium. What the brain of the hero of the story was made of. 100% pure ingenium.

  • Akido (unregistered)

    She must have been REALLY cute.

  • Paul (unregistered) in reply to Anon

    Ye gods, that is a horrendous formula! The worst part is that my Inner Geek is busy trying to find an easier way to write it....

  • (cs) in reply to Real-modo
    Real-modo:
    My parents had a problem with a spreadsheet my sister set up for them, and they asked me for help.

    I _____________________ and now they ___________.

    Oooh, ad-libs... I love 'em.

    I PULLED_MY_HAIR_OUT and now they _LAUGH__.

  • nico (unregistered)
    Yes, thank you. Actually, I usually use it in Word all the time because the formatting on the templates we use for reports is all f'ed up and the only way to get it be consistent is by format painting the bits that look right into the bits that don't.

    why not using styles instead?

  • Anon (unregistered) in reply to nico
    nico:
    Yes, thank you. Actually, I usually use it in Word all the time because the formatting on the templates we use for reports is all f'ed up and the only way to get it be consistent is by format painting the bits that look right into the bits that don't.

    why not using styles instead?

    Because it's too much effort for some stupid report that I'm required to do each month. Also, if (when) they change the format, it'll be all f'ed up again anyway.

  • (cs)

    Holy shit that's one horrid formula.

    The girl better have been drop dead gorgeous and at least performed sexual favours afterwards.

  • (cs) in reply to nico

    Here's a formula I recently had to build. It is easily as long/complex as the WTF cell, but because of the formating it is easier to read and understand. I used CTRL-Enter to add lines to the actual formula.

    =IF(AND($D$1="F1",ISNUMBER($K5)),IF($K5<Pass_Retained_Capacity,"Retain Capacity,",""),"") & IF(AND($D$1="F1",ISNUMBER(Dis_2_min),ISNUMBER(Dis_2_max),ISNUMBER($J5)),IF(OR($J5<Dis_2_min,$J5>Dis_2_max),"2nd Discharge Cap,",""),"") & IF(AND($D$1="F1",ISNUMBER(DCR_min),ISNUMBER(DCR_max),ISNUMBER($O5)),IF(OR($O5<DCR_min,$O5>DCR_max),"DCR Fail,",""),"") & IF(AND($D$1="F1",ISNUMBER(ACR_min),ISNUMBER(ACR_max),ISNUMBER($S5)),IF(OR($S5<ACR_min,$S5>ACR_max),"ACR Fail,",""),"") & IF(AND($D$1="F1",ISNUMBER(OCV_Min),ISNUMBER(OCV_Max),ISNUMBER($T5)),IF(OR($T5<OCV_Min,$T5>OCV_Max),"OCV Fail,",""),"") & IF(AND($D$1="F1",$U5<>0,OR($U5 < Shoulder_Concession_Height, $U5>Shoulder_Height_Max)),"Shoulder Height,","") & IF(AND($D$1="F1",$V5<>0,OR($V5 < Concession_Height_Min, $V5>Overall_Height_Max)),"Overall Height,","") & IF(AND($D$1="F1",ISNUMBER(Weight_Min),ISNUMBER(Weight_Max),ISNUMBER($W5)),IF(OR($W5<Weight_Min,$W5>Weight_Max),"Weight Fail,",""),"") & IF(AND($D$1="F1",LEN($C5)>0,OR(ISBLANK($K5),ISBLANK($J5),ISBLANK($O5),ISBLANK($S5),ISBLANK($T5),ISBLANK($U5),ISBLANK($V5))),"Missing Data,","")

    Bonus points if you can identify the industy...

  • Matt (unregistered)

    Ok, I want to know what the woman was trying to actually do in the spreadsheet, and what this formula was meant to be doing.

  • (cs)

    You accidentally the whole point.

  • Protector one (unregistered)

    That actually looks pretty delicious. Something I could have written, if Excel was 'mah thang'. Curious how it handles feb 29s though, with that "...*365.25+1900" in there...

    distineo

  • (cs) in reply to Merrick
    Merrick:
    Real-modo:
    My parents had a problem with a spreadsheet my sister set up for them, and they asked me for help.

    I _____________________ and now they ___________.

    Oooh, ad-libs... I love 'em.

    I PULLED_MY_HAIR_OUT and now they _LAUGH__.

    Hooray for amateur Trichology!
  • (cs) in reply to jonnyq
    jonnyq:
    You accidentally the whole point.
    That was also what I.
  • (cs)
    After spending a few minutes reading about how CHOOSE and MATCH worked, he spent the rest of the afternoon “debugging” the spreadsheet. He eventually figured it out, thus maintaining his position as an Expert of All Things Computer.
    Yeah, but how does the story end? If he did all that and didn't even try and get her phone number, that was TRWTF!(*)

    (*) inb4 "I heard he got to FRIST!!!! base"(**)

    (**) and don't even go there with the fist-related jokes.

  • (cs) in reply to Kermos
    Kermos:
    The girl better have been drop dead gorgeous and at least performed sexual favours afterwards.
    "At least"??? What more do you want, money and a parade? Hell, if she's drop-dead gorgeous and willing to perform sexual favours, I'd fix a sendmail.cf raw (without m4) and call it even.
  • (cs) in reply to Auction_God
    Auction_God:

    Bonus points if you can identify the industy...

    Some type of livestock. Cattle would be my first guess.

  • (cs)

    That was simple formula. I really like those with their own "assembler" using INDIRECT() function.

  • (cs)

    What's that you call Excel? Really, last time I used Excel was like ten years ago.

    Anyway, she must have been really cute because I usually dispatch anyone who asks me about how to do their job.

  • Anonymous Coward (unregistered) in reply to ounos
    ounos:
    jonnyq:
    You accidentally the whole point.
    That was also what I.

    Recursive humor is.

  • WiggyWiggy (unregistered)

    I think we need to see a pic of the brunette at the time she asked for help. You know, was it really worth it to spend the afternoon debugging it for her.

  • (cs) in reply to Real-modo
    Real-modo:
    My parents had a problem with a spreadsheet my sister set up for them, and they asked me for help.
    I said, "Why not? Can't dance..." and now they are teaching me the bitwise left shuffle.
  • StDoodle (unregistered) in reply to Auction_God
    Auction_God:
    Here's a formula I recently had to build. It is easily as long/complex as the WTF cell, but because of the formating it is easier to read and understand. I used CTRL-Enter to add lines to the actual formula.

    [formula]

    Bonus points if you can identify the industy...

    Is that from an electrical supply company (heavy duty / industrial) bill-of-lading or related form? Curious cat is curious...

  • leppie (unregistered)
    leppie:
    leppie:
    First?

    Nope, slow web serving :|

    And even slower brain

  • Buddy (unregistered)

    I worked in places where anything with a blinking light was considered as something for the computer guy.

    I remember one Canon printer that would take its good sweet time warming up in the morning. The helpful message - "Cleaning Wire" - while it clicked and buzzed annoyingly. Sometimes it was ready in a few minutes, other times, especially if too many jobs were queued, it would sulk and repeat the wire cleaning process a few more times and take half an hour to get ready. I got so fed up with the stupid thing I set up a chron job to print a diagnostic page early in the AM to pre-warm the printer prior to anyone coming in.

    For ridiculous Excel formulas, I'd try to convince them to do it in steps, one per column, then hide the intermediate results. Also to introduce fixed cell references to insert important constants. Excel is pretty powerful and can do a lot, it's the grunt working hard in the background while PowerPoint gets all the pizazz. PowerPoint is great at sucking up every minute of your time. If you have four or six or eight hours to do a presentation, PowerPoint will take all four or six or eight hours. In the end, the presentations all look the same.

    Yes, those with skimpy outfits always got preferential treatment. Nothing like hiring temporary summer help, especially those not versed in appropriate office attire...

  • (cs)

    Oh man 100% agreed. The copy cell format button is awesome!

  • (cs) in reply to dpm
    dpm:
    Kermos:
    The girl better have been drop dead gorgeous and at least performed sexual favours afterwards.
    "At least"??? What more do you want, money and a parade? Hell, if she's drop-dead gorgeous and willing to perform sexual favours, I'd fix a sendmail.cf raw (without m4) and call it even.

    Well, she could also become my permanent sexual slave. :)

  • (cs) in reply to Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward:
    ounos:
    jonnyq:
    You accidentally the whole point.
    That was also what I.

    Recursive humor is.

    Always fun to explain the.

  • MMaI (unregistered) in reply to Kermos
    dpm:
    Kermos:
    The girl better have been drop dead gorgeous and at least performed sexual favours afterwards.
    "At least"??? What more do you want, money and a parade? Hell, if she's drop-dead gorgeous and willing to perform sexual favours, I'd fix a sendmail.cf raw (without m4) and call it even.

    you're a bit too desperate aren't you ;)

  • (unregistered) (unregistered)

    Real WTF here is that the article begins with a complaint about how software developers are roped in for every even tangentially computer-related task and then describes a problem that actually called for one.

  • (cs) in reply to Real-modo
    Real-modo:
    My parents had a problem with a spreadsheet my sister set up for them, and they asked me for help.

    I _____________________ and now they ___________.

    A møøse once bit my sister ... No realli!

  • Pedro Melo (unregistered)

    Which shows how much pain a guy will endure for sex, I guess...

  • (cs) in reply to Auction_God
    Auction_God:
    Bonus points if you can identify the industy...

    Got to be electrical/Electronics testing of some sort with AC Resistance, DC Resistance, On Circuit? Voltage, 2nd Discharge Cap(acitor)?

    Where the shoulder height and wight come into I haven't a clue it unless it's testing stun capacity of a taser and the they refer to the target.

  • Buddy (unregistered) in reply to Kermos
    Kermos:
    Holy shit that's one horrid formula.

    The girl better have been drop dead gorgeous and at least performed sexual favours afterwards.

    Watching a bit too much porno there, Kermos. The most one can expect in the real world is a flash of brassiere at an office picnic or other informal event, but only provided all these conditions are satisfied:

    a) alcohol is available b) other girls are there to dare her on c) one is not a creep

    Anything more requires some real investment of time and money.

  • (cs) in reply to Real-modo
    Real-modo:
    My parents had a problem with a spreadsheet my sister set up for them, and they asked me for help.

    I _____________________ and now they ___________.

    I looked into the abyss of cell 24Z and now they feed me with a plastic spoon.

  • (cs) in reply to MMaI
    MMaI:
    dpm:
    if she's drop-dead gorgeous and willing to perform sexual favours, I'd fix a sendmail.cf raw (without m4) and call it even.
    you're a bit too desperate aren't you ;)
    No, "a bit too desperate" is when you're willing to fix sendmail.cf for just money.
  • James M (unregistered)

    Welcome to investment banking, the entire system runs on Excel as a combination of VBA code and cell formulae, which goes some way to explaining the mess the industry is in! I see things like this every day.

    Though surely it would be cell Z24, not 24Z?

  • (cs) in reply to Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward:

    Recursive humor is.

    Since when Yoda an account on TDWTF has?

  • SomeCoder (unregistered)

    The real WTF is him spending all day working on a stupid Excel document for that girl.

    As others have said, sexual favors better have followed. Otherwise... WTF!?

  • Jasper (unregistered)

    And...? Where's the rest of the story? Did he ask her out, they had a good time, they got married and happy, two kids and a dog? ;)

  • N Morrison (unregistered) in reply to Buddy
    Buddy:
    For ridiculous Excel formulas, I'd try to convince them to do it in steps, one per column, then hide the intermediate results.
    Convert them to your own functions written in VBA. Much easier to debug and maintain, and often far simpler.
  • Lister (unregistered) in reply to Anon
    Anon:
    nico:
    Yes, thank you. Actually, I usually use it in Word all the time because the formatting on the templates we use for reports is all f'ed up and the only way to get it be consistent is by format painting the bits that look right into the bits that don't.

    why not using styles instead?

    Because it's too much effort for some stupid report that I'm required to do each month. Also, if (when) they change the format, it'll be all f'ed up again anyway.

    Think of a style as a copied format that can be chosen from a list to be applied later. In essence, the first time you see that bit that looks right, you define the style. Then every time you see that bit that looks wrong, you apply the appropriate style. It does take a few moments longer to create the style than it does to copy the format. But you only have to do it once.

  • (cs) in reply to Bodestone

    Some close guesses... It is high-power...

    And the answer is: Lithium Nanophosphate batteries for hybrids/plug-in vehicles.

    Since the spreadsheet is used for all of our experimental cells (electric cell, not spreadsheet cell), the "F1" part makes sure to display the rejection reason only for the "F1" project. We made cells for one of the race teams in the Formula One race... http://www.autobloggreen.com/tag/kers

  • justsomedude (unregistered) in reply to Lister

    Who says "24Z"? Ranges are referenced with the columns letter(s) before the row numbers. It's "Z24", not "24Z".

  • JustinCasey (unregistered) in reply to Auction_God
    Auction_God:
    Bonus points if you can identify the industy...

    My guess would be an amusement park. With shoulder height, overall height, min/max weight, and capacity, it reads like a formula for how many passengers you can get into a rollercoaster. But there's enough other stuff in there to make me think this is a long shot.

  • IT Girl (unregistered) in reply to Buddy
    Buddy:
    Yes, those with skimpy outfits always got preferential treatment. Nothing like hiring temporary summer help, especially those not versed in appropriate office attire...

    And this is why women find men so bemusing...

    I used to be the girl that could bat her eyelashes and get the IT guy to do whatever she wanted him to do. But when I took over his job, the other women who never leaned how to file a trouble ticket where baffled about how to get their problems fixed.

    And no, before you ask, cute guys don't get preferential treatment either. ;)

Leave a comment on “Cell 24Z”

Log In or post as a guest

Replying to comment #:

Log Out

« Return to Article