• Don (unregistered)

    Yeah, but did he ever open that port for the guy?

  • (cs)

    Any port in a (fire) storm.

  • joe blow (unregistered)

    Do what you want with the router...just don't mess up their xbox.

  • (cs)

    And here I was hoping for a physical hole in a firewall designed to contain real fire.

  • disapported (unregistered)

    Bah, what with firefighters and firewalls, I was expecting a top-drawer terminology blunder.

  • n_slash_a (unregistered) in reply to disapported

    Awww... no page source comments or unicorns? :(

  • (cs)

    That firewall was a fire engine red herring.

  • (cs) in reply to n_slash_a
    n_slash_a:
    Awww... no page source comments or unicorns? :(
    Mark is not Remy...
  • Anonymous (unregistered) in reply to n_slash_a
    n_slash_a:
    Awww... no page source comments or unicorns? :(
    Nah, this is one of Mark's articles. Instead of unicorns and HTML comments we get bizarre sentence structure and mind-bending prose. Not that I'm complaining, I like all the editors round here. It's a shame that some of the readers can be so damn ungrateful sometimes.
  • Pedantic (unregistered)

    Just imagine if it was something like /dev/ttyS0 or even 03F8-03FF!

  • Steve (unregistered)
    this is exactly why he doesn’t give anyone the password to the router.
    Uhmmm, you can get fired and sent to jail if you don't give the router passwords to your boss.

    Of course, if you do, and he fries the whole network, it will also be your ass. Sometimes you can't win.

  • (cs)
    TFA:
    Ok, he says that it’s not easily explained over the phone.
    So what? Is it easy to talk through Tom over the phone?

    If I were Jeff, I'd have told Tom to just hand the phone to this idiot "tech guy" so I could talk to him myself. Might have saved a drive and time wasted undoing the horrible configuration.

  • Anon (unregistered)

    Well, it is called a "COM port" after all. And... and... sorry no, I really can't defend this moron tech.

  • Design Pattern (unregistered)

    Just One Port?

    This seriously needs Just One Fix!

    CAPTCHA: praesent - i have no good comment on praesent and add this text only as an appismet for akismet! (i know it should be appeasement - but now the words rhyme!)

  • (cs) in reply to galgorah
    galgorah:
    n_slash_a:
    Awww... no page source comments or unicorns? :(
    Mark is not Remy...
    You can tell by the overwhelming absence of whiny naysayers, each more shenanigan-crying than the last.
  • (cs)

    To which I ask, why does anyone else have an admin password to the "alarm server" either? Seems like that is a critical piece of infrastructure that you wouldn't want some random tech playing with.

  • PITA (unregistered)

    Legacy mode = off

  • (cs) in reply to boog
    boog:
    TFA:
    Ok, he says that it’s not easily explained over the phone.
    So what? Is it easy to talk through Tom over the phone?

    If I were Jeff, I'd have told Tom to just hand the phone to this idiot "tech guy" so I could talk to him myself. Might have saved a drive and time wasted undoing the horrible configuration.

    Agreed. This sounds like the blind leading the blind.

    Geez, when Tom asked the tech about the port, you'd think he would have asked a few more questions? You know, maybe ask to see the physical cable? Even someone as "techincally-minded" as Tom would realize that a 9-pin D connector wouldn't fit into an RJ-45 jack.

    Or at least you'd think that.

  • Mike Caron (unregistered)

    I call BS on this story. I worked in Fire Alarms and Security alarms for 5 years, and I highly doubt they got a networked alarm system for either.

    Now, sure, they exist. But, they cost a lot of money, and are tailored for very large complexes (multiple buildings, hundreds and hundreds of zones).

    Normal alarms, such as those found in regular buildings, are self contained, and NOT connected to anything else other than the monitoring company.

    Now, I don't doubt the incredible stupidity of the tech in question. I've cleaned up more messes than I care to count by idiots who, if asked for a Red Robertson, would look for a guy born in Soviet Russia!

    In which case, maybe the story does make sense, if the tech was asking for a port that he didn't even need (nor could use)...

  • (cs)

    Never trust a jun^H^H^H tech guy.

  • Zach Bora (unregistered)

    I don't get the story... what did the tech need with COM1? It's right there on the computer... is it because he couldnt find the computer?

  • Gary (unregistered)

    And why did he need COM1 open on the firewall, anyway? I hate these half baked stories that leave loose ends all over the place...

  • (cs)

    Jeff here, the story is true, though it wasn't me, but my co-worker who's the firefighter.

    As it happened, everything was over the phone, my co-worker didn't have to go there until the next day.

    "Tom", the firefighter on site, wasn't much of a computer guy, but even he knew that COM1 wasn't right.

    While you might think the installer would know better, just this week I spoke with a phone system vendor trying to put a phone system in for another of our customers. The phone system vendor had just merged with another company and was basically forced to start selling Avaya IP office. They had NEVER installed anything IP related. This was their first IP capable phone system, and to say they were in over their heads is vastly understating the situation.

  • dew|frost (unregistered) in reply to Steve

    No, it's easy. You just set a password so horribly convoluted your boss will never be able to type it correctly.

  • Anon (unregistered) in reply to Zach Bora
    Zach Bora:
    I don't get the story... what did the tech need with COM1? It's right there on the computer... is it because he couldnt find the computer?

    Perhaps he had a laptop without a serial port.

  • Justin (unregistered)

    I'm the guy in Jeff's story (I'm "Jeff" but my name is actually Justin). Jeff's a coworker.

    It happened to me I swear to God. No, I didn't give him access to COM1 or our firewall password (which he had asked me for to do it himself).

    I thought about giving him access to a spare Smoothwall I was going to setup just to see what rediculous-ness would insue. Didn't have that kind of free time unfortunately.

    The door hardware did not infact connect to the internet. You have to connect the door hardware "brain" via a 9-pin serial port to a PC onsite. He was mix and matching his installed systems.

    This guy knew NOTHING about computer hardware or software. He has only ever done standalone and keypad systems previously.

    It was a fairly big company and he knew the most. Which was pretty sad.

  • eb (unregistered) in reply to Gary
    Gary:
    And why did he need COM1 open on the firewall, anyway? I hate these half baked stories that leave loose ends all over the place...

    The other "tech" firefighter was helping him. He knew he was incompetent so he just agreed with the first suggestions.

  • Justin (unregistered) in reply to Justin

    Correction to the story too. It was a swipe card system for our door locks and our EMS locker that was tied into the security system with just a dry contact sensor. So he was kind of accurate in that they were connected but not an alarm system by itself.

  • Knuckle Dragging Neanderthal (unregistered) in reply to Justin
    Justin:
    I'm the guy in Jeff's story (I'm "Jeff" but my name is actually Justin). Jeff's a coworker.

    It happened to me I swear to God. No, I didn't give him access to COM1 or our firewall password (which he had asked me for to do it himself).

    I thought about giving him access to a spare Smoothwall I was going to setup just to see what rediculous-ness would insue. Didn't have that kind of free time unfortunately.

    The door hardware did not infact connect to the internet. You have to connect the door hardware "brain" via a 9-pin serial port to a PC onsite. He was mix and matching his installed systems.

    This guy knew NOTHING about computer hardware or software. He has only ever done standalone and keypad systems previously.

    It was a fairly big company and he knew the most. Which was pretty sad.

    The number of misspellings in this comment leads me to believe that this must be a sockpuppet of one the TDWTF authors.

  • DeaDPooL (unregistered) in reply to Mike Caron
    Mike Caron:
    I call BS on this story. I worked in Fire Alarms and Security alarms for 5 years, and I highly doubt they got a networked alarm system for either.

    ...

    In which case, maybe the story does make sense, if the tech was asking for a port that he didn't even need (nor could use)...

    Yes, COM1 is a serial port. Meaning a physical 9 pin connector on a PC, and not something that has anything to do with Jeff's router.

    This tech was on his laptop trying to setup this security system which required him to plug in via RS-232, and since he apparently didn't even know what that was, assumed somehow it was a blocked port on a router.

    A lot like calling your internet provider because you didn't plug in your headphones.

  • gidoca (unregistered) in reply to dew|frost
    dew|frost:
    No, it's easy. You just set a password so horribly convoluted your boss will never be able to type it correctly.
    Yeah. Best to use lots of symbols like ←↓→øþæßðµ, which you don't find on a normal keyboard. ;)

    BTW, is it only me or is the form not working for everbody else using Chromium? I had to use document.getElementById('aspnetForm').submit() in the Console to post. :(

  • Justin (unregistered) in reply to Knuckle Dragging Neanderthal

    Or that I did it from a mobile phone. Thanks for pointing out my poor spelling sans-spellcheck.

  • Justin (unregistered) in reply to DeaDPooL
    DeaDPooL:
    Mike Caron:
    I call BS on this story. I worked in Fire Alarms and Security alarms for 5 years, and I highly doubt they got a networked alarm system for either.

    ...

    In which case, maybe the story does make sense, if the tech was asking for a port that he didn't even need (nor could use)...

    Yes, COM1 is a serial port. Meaning a physical 9 pin connector on a PC, and not something that has anything to do with Jeff's router.

    This tech was on his laptop trying to setup this security system which required him to plug in via RS-232, and since he apparently didn't even know what that was, assumed somehow it was a blocked port on a router.

    A lot like calling your internet provider because you didn't plug in your headphones.

    He actually left a lot out of the story. For comedy reasons maybe IDK. The guy that was installing it was working with a support guy from one of his offices in another part of the state. From what I gathered after the fact from the firemen onsite watching him, they were both reading manuals and procedures while asking for things.

    They had no clue what they needed or what they were asking for. He saw a procedure that said to log into the router and add an exception but apparently was reading the wrong manual for an IP related model I assume.

  • Jeremy Friesner (unregistered) in reply to Steve
    Steve:
    this is exactly why he doesn’t give anyone the password to the router.
    Uhmmm, you can get fired and sent to jail if you don't give the router passwords to your boss.

    Yeah, but you only have to give your boss the password if (s)he asks for it... most bosses who are that clueless won't think to ask for the password, either. (and if they do ask for a password, you can always give them the password to the 'nobody' account and see if that satisfies them)

  • Fred (unregistered) in reply to Justin
    Justin:
    I thought about giving him access to a spare Smoothwall I was going to setup just to see what rediculous-ness would insue.
    Win!! Bonus points if it had a 32-character password. Trifecta if one of the password characters required you to hold down the left control key AND the right Enter key while pressing F9. (Try it!)
  • Slicerwizard (unregistered) in reply to Knuckle Dragging Neanderthal
    Knuckle Dragging Neanderthal:
    The number of misspellings in this comment leads me to believe that this must be a sockpuppet of one the TDWTF authors.
    I counted about eight in that post, which seems to be a bit more dense than the usual offerings from the staffers here.

    One thing I don't understand is how they can write stuff like Mark's "what he does for a living and," - surely their IT life has introduced them to concepts like structure and parsing? How do they think one should parse "a living and,"?

    I see gaffes like this example and, I wonder WTF are they thinking?

    I guess spell checking and, some proofreading and, a passing nod to grammar rules are passe these days.

  • Ralph (unregistered) in reply to gidoca
    gidoca:
    I had to use document.getElementById('aspnetForm').submit() in the Console to post. :(
    (Puking all over my monitor!) Hey all you so-called web "designers" out there -- what's wrong with <input type="submit">? Too widely supported for your taste?
  • Slicerwizard (unregistered) in reply to Justin
    Justin:
    Or that I did it from a mobile phone. Thanks for pointing out my poor spelling sans-spellcheck.
    Damn. I think you just solved the mystery of TDWTF!
  • Ben (unregistered) in reply to Ralph
    Ralph:
    gidoca:
    I had to use document.getElementById('aspnetForm').submit() in the Console to post. :(
    (Puking all over my monitor!) Hey all you so-called web "designers" out there -- what's wrong with <input type="submit">? Too widely supported for your taste?

    It's pretty amazing what you can do entirely in HTML and CSS. 90% of the Javascript out there is completely unnecessary.

  • (cs) in reply to dew|frost
    dew|frost:
    No, it's easy. You just set a password so horribly convoluted your boss will never be able to type it correctly.

    Set your font to Microsoft Sans Serif and email it to him: IIlllIlIllIlllIIIll

  • (cs) in reply to Ben
    Ben:
    Ralph:
    gidoca:
    I had to use document.getElementById('aspnetForm').submit() in the Console to post. :(
    (Puking all over my monitor!) Hey all you so-called web "designers" out there -- what's wrong with <input type="submit">? Too widely supported for your taste?

    It's pretty amazing what you can do entirely in HTML and CSS. 90% of the Javascript out there is completely unnecessary.

    It's pretty amazing what you can do in C and/or Basic. 90% of <insert your favorite language> out there is completely unnecessary.

  • Justin (unregistered) in reply to Slicerwizard
    Slicerwizard:
    Knuckle Dragging Neanderthal:
    The number of misspellings in this comment leads me to believe that this must be a sockpuppet of one the TDWTF authors.
    I counted about eight in that post, which seems to be a bit more dense than the usual offerings from the staffers here.

    One thing I don't understand is how they can write stuff like Mark's "what he does for a living and," - surely their IT life has introduced them to concepts like structure and parsing? How do they think one should parse "a living and,"?

    I see gaffes like this example and, I wonder WTF are they thinking?

    I guess spell checking and, some proofreading and, a passing nod to grammar rules are passe these days.

    I double checked and I had only two misspellings in my comment (if you don't count ridiculous-ness as a word I made up). Spell check confirmed also. Or are you referring to the original post?

  • (cs) in reply to DeaDPooL
    DeaDPooL:
    Mike Caron:
    I call BS on this story. I worked in Fire Alarms and Security alarms for 5 years, and I highly doubt they got a networked alarm system for either.

    ...

    In which case, maybe the story does make sense, if the tech was asking for a port that he didn't even need (nor could use)...

    Yes, COM1 is a serial port. Meaning a physical 9 pin connector on a PC, and not something that has anything to do with Jeff's router.

    This tech was on his laptop trying to setup this security system which required him to plug in via RS-232, and since he apparently didn't even know what that was, assumed somehow it was a blocked port on a router.

    A lot like calling your internet provider because you don't know where to plug in your headphones.

    FTFY
  • (cs)

    "[...] Jeff reviewed several vendors [...]", but not nearly closely enough. Better luck next time.

  • (cs) in reply to gidoca
    gidoca:
    dew|frost:
    No, it's easy. You just set a password so horribly convoluted your boss will never be able to type it correctly.
    Yeah. Best to use lots of symbols like ←↓→øþæßðµ, which you don't find on a normal keyboard. ;)
    I enter my password in italics to confuse people.
  • Justin (unregistered) in reply to Coyne
    Coyne:
    "[...] Jeff reviewed several vendors [...]", but not nearly closely enough. Better luck next time.

    Went to bid. We pretty much had to choose the lowest bid because it was substantially less.

    I was sad....

  • (cs) in reply to akatherder
    akatherder:
    dew|frost:
    No, it's easy. You just set a password so horribly convoluted your boss will never be able to type it correctly.

    Set your font to Microsoft Sans Serif and email it to him: IIlllIlIllIlllIIIll

    Better yet, send him a screenshot of it so he can't just copy/paste it.

  • duis (unregistered) in reply to Rick
    Rick:
    gidoca:
    dew|frost:
    No, it's easy. You just set a password so horribly convoluted your boss will never be able to type it correctly.
    Yeah. Best to use lots of symbols like ←↓→øþæßðµ, which you don't find on a normal keyboard. ;)
    I enter my password in italics to confuse people.
    I call BS. That can't be password. Your real password would show up for me as asterisks. Look. Here is my password:
  • Zoomba (unregistered) in reply to Pedantic
    Pedantic:
    Just imagine if it was something like /dev/ttyS0 or even 03F8-03FF!

    Oh the horrible memories are flooding back

  • (cs) in reply to Someone You Know
    Someone You Know:
    akatherder:
    dew|frost:
    No, it's easy. You just set a password so horribly convoluted your boss will never be able to type it correctly.

    Set your font to Microsoft Sans Serif and email it to him: IIlllIlIllIlllIIIll

    Better yet, send him a screenshot of it so he can't just copy/paste it.

    I would, but I don't have a wooden table handy.

Leave a comment on “Just One Port”

Log In or post as a guest

Replying to comment #:

Log Out

« Return to Article