The Daily WTF: Curious Perversions in Information Technology

Mason Wheeler · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

anon:
FC:
Rebecca:
Once there was an elephant Who tried to use the telephant...
Well, that's irrelephant isn't it?
Yes, but it was just a bit of irrevephant humor.

One night I shot irrelephant in my pajamas. What it was doing in my pajamas, I'll never know.

Mason Wheeler · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

DN:
ggeens:
Pretty sure we don't need that alternate graphic key anymore either.

I have a Danish/Norwegian keyboard, and I use AltGr all the time. I have to press it to type these characters: {}[]@£$€

{, }, [, ], @, and $ require a special alt on your keyboard? Ouch! Those are standard keys on the English layout...

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

SeySayux:
Anonymous:
I've never understood why some people are unable to distinguish between their browser window and the content therein. They all have TVs so it's hardly an alien concept. If they saw a shot of some broken glass in a TV program, would they ring up their local repairman to get their "smashed screen" fixed? How do they even know they own a TV if they can't tell what part is the content and what part is the TV?
That is because for 90% of the people their higher level cortex shuts down as soon as you put them behind a computer.
The other 10% ends up in IT.

Keeping in mind that 20% work in IT.

You know who I'm talking about.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

I emfatically support mental telephaty.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Mason Wheeler:
DN:
ggeens:
Pretty sure we don't need that alternate graphic key anymore either.

I have a Danish/Norwegian keyboard, and I use AltGr all the time. I have to press it to type these characters: {}[]@£$€

{, }, [, ], @, and $ require a special alt on your keyboard? Ouch! Those are standard keys on the English layout...

I'm pretty sure the keys you have for those characters are replaced by accents that are actually useful in everyday typing for him.

Besides, it's better than French* keyboards. They need to use Shift in order to type a number.

*French french. Not your Friendly neighbourhood Canadians who have a much more sensible french Qwerty, which also needs AltGr for [,],{,} and @

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Alex:
Mason Wheeler:
DN:
ggeens:
Pretty sure we don't need that alternate graphic key anymore either.

I have a Danish/Norwegian keyboard, and I use AltGr all the time. I have to press it to type these characters: {}[]@£$€

{, }, [, ], @, and $ require a special alt on your keyboard? Ouch! Those are standard keys on the English layout...
I'm pretty sure the keys you have for those characters are replaced by accents that are actually useful in everyday typing for him.

Besides, it's better than French* keyboards. They need to use Shift in order to type a number.

*French french. Not your Friendly neighbourhood Canadians who have a much more sensible french Qwerty, which also needs AltGr for [,],{,} and @

wow, it's almost as if the keyboard designers wanted make life difficult for programmers

Mcoder · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Alex:
Mason Wheeler:
DN:
ggeens:
Pretty sure we don't need that alternate graphic key anymore either.

I have a Danish/Norwegian keyboard, and I use AltGr all the time. I have to press it to type these characters: {}[]@£$€

{, }, [, ], @, and $ require a special alt on your keyboard? Ouch! Those are standard keys on the English layout...
I'm pretty sure the keys you have for those characters are replaced by accents that are actually useful in everyday typing for him.

Besides, it's better than French* keyboards. They need to use Shift in order to type a number.

*French french. Not your Friendly neighbourhood Canadians who have a much more sensible french Qwerty, which also needs AltGr for [,],{,} and @

Brazilian keyboards have almost all (except for AE, that I simply can't type on Windows. Lame, it is there on Linux) the french special characters accessible requiring at most shift, and an extra key for directly imputing ç. Yet, [], {}, $ and @ work exactly the same way as the US keyboards.

Ok, our keyboards have a couple more keys than the french one, but it is still bad design from their part.

zblongladder · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Mason Wheeler:
anon:
FC:
Rebecca:
Once there was an elephant Who tried to use the telephant...
Well, that's irrelephant isn't it?
Yes, but it was just a bit of irrevephant humor.

One night I shot irrelephant in my pajamas. What it was doing in my pajamas, I'll never know.

The next day, we shot an elephant, but the tusks were so firmly embedded we couldn't budge them. Of course, in Alabama, the Tuscaloosa. But that's entirely irrelephant to what I was saying.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Ozz:
The SysRq key does still serve a purpose - especially in *nix systems.

Really? Pray tell. I've been using more flavors of Unix than I can recall since 1984, and I don't think I've ever used SysRq. What do you claim it does?

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Sys This:
Ozz:
The SysRq key does still serve a purpose - especially in *nix systems.
Really? Pray tell. I've been using more flavors of Unix than I can recall since 1984, and I don't think I've ever used SysRq. What do you claim it does?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magic_SysRq_key

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

SeySayux:
for 90% of the people their higher level cortex shuts down as soon as you put them behind a computer.

But of course! The magic incomprehensible computer is a thinking machine, right? It does all my thinking for me, so why should I pain my brain?

Hell I don't even read the dialog boxes and stuff that pops up all the time. I just play whack-a-mole with the buttons (doesn't matter which one; anything that makes it go away) so I can get back to pr0n^H^H^H^Hwork.

Rick · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

SR:
I'd love to have supported Reality. The punnage would be endless.

I worked on a competing product to Reality, called UniVerse. When it crashed, its message was 'Fatal termination of UniVerse". No, really. Honest. Both products were versions of the Pick System, named after Dick Pick. No, really. Look it up in Wikipedia.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pick_operating_system

See.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

epsalon:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magic_SysRq_key

Hah, that's nothing. Any Intel based computer (sorry Apple oldtimers) will go into a special diagnostic mode if you simultaneously hold the left control key, the right enter key (on the numeric pad) and press F8. It bypasses all file system permissions and lets you log on even when you forgot your password.

This combination has proven useful on countless support calls!

hikari · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

DN:
ggeens:
Pretty sure we don't need that alternate graphic key anymore either.

I have a Danish/Norwegian keyboard, and I use AltGr all the time. I have to press it to type these characters: {}[]@£$€

I have to use it to type €. On the rare occasions that I want to type € (has to be said we don't have much use for in the UK currently).

cconroy · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

re:me:
Evil Code Monkey:
Knux2:
GalacticCowboy:
Anon:
PRT SC key

Well there's your problem. My keyboard has a key that is clearly marked "Print Scrn", but my laptop has "prt sc" (all lower case). I don't have a "PRT SC" key!

Mine says

Prnt Scrn SysRq

Whatever that means...

I win. Mine actually says "Print Screen" right on the button.

Captcha: transverbero - a Spanish word that changes spelling based on the gender of the person/thing performing the action

And mine says:
PrtScn SysRq Insert
Good luck getting it to even do a screenshot if you've hit the F Lock button at some point. Makes me wonder if the "F" in F Lock is for a censored word that you say when you realize that it's responsible for not getting the screenshot?

my "F" lock says "Func Loc". better than Tone Loc i guess.

Blasphemer! Nothing is better than Tone Loc! To make up for this egregious transgression, I humbly suggest that this site be renamed to The Daily WTFunkyColdMedina.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Izhido:
“Reality is corrupted”
“Are you sure you wish to destroy Reality?”

Matt Smith, is that you?

+1 Doctor Who reference

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Code Refuser:
"I figured a screenshot was in order.
After a grueling thirty-minute exercise of locating the Print Screen PRT SC key, loading Paint, pasting, saving, and then emailing, I waited another few minutes for the rather large attachment to show up."

This is perhaps one of the only nice things about working in corporate IT, where you know that all of your users already have a remote control client installed on their machines.

Unless it's incredibly obvious what the problem is, I've gotten into the habit of just remoting into their machine right away and having them SHOW ME the problem. It really makes life a lot easier. Especially when there are a bunch of applications that I'm expected to support, yet really aren't all that familiar with myself.

Once upon a time, there was no remoting into another computer. Deal with that, Sporty! :)

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

“Reality is corrupted” “Are you sure you wish to destroy Reality?”

This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes.

zblongladder · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

DN:
GalacticCowboy:
Anon:
PRT SC key

Well there's your problem. My keyboard has a key that is clearly marked "Print Scrn", but my laptop has "prt sc" (all lower case). I don't have a "PRT SC" key!

Mine says

Prnt Scrn SysRq

Whatever that means...

Mine is PrtScn SysRq

The people who design keyboards should do a Reality check

I'm pretty sure that lots of keys on the average keyboard are there for backwards compatibility (or compatibility with random things that found a use for otherwise unused keys). To use the SysRq key there, you'd have to press Alt+PrtScr.

Incidentally, the SysRq key (which is normally completely unused--it wasn't even used on the PC/AT) actually has a use in Linux. If your kernel was compiled with the "magic SysRq key" (which most distros other than Ubuntu are) you can use it to send commands straight to the kernel, in case (say) your system locks up. A pretty common one is R-S-E-I-U-B:

The r stands for put keyboard in raw mode The s for sync the disk The e for terminate all processes The i for kill all processes The u for remount all filesystems read only The b for reboot the system

([url]Source: http://www.brunolinux.com/01-First_Things_To_Know/Skinny_Elephants.html)

It'll reboot an otherwise frozen system. The memnonic is "Raising skinny elephants is ultimately boring".

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

We have Æ, Ø, Å instead, and the diacritical marks ´, `, ¨, ~, ^, and the useless symbol ¤. But it isn't harder to press Alt+Gr than Shift. And unlike on the US keyboard layout, one can press a diacritic key followed by a letter to make an accented letter.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Rebecca:
Once there was an elephant Who tried to use the telephant...

Achievement unlocked: Got to where the sidewalk ended - 15G

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Alex:
Mason Wheeler:
DN:
ggeens:
Pretty sure we don't need that alternate graphic key anymore either.

I have a Danish/Norwegian keyboard, and I use AltGr all the time. I have to press it to type these characters: {}[]@£$€

{, }, [, ], @, and $ require a special alt on your keyboard? Ouch! Those are standard keys on the English layout...
I'm pretty sure the keys you have for those characters are replaced by accents that are actually useful in everyday typing for him.

Besides, it's better than French* keyboards. They need to use Shift in order to type a number.

*French french. Not your Friendly neighbourhood Canadians who have a much more sensible french Qwerty, which also needs AltGr for [,],{,} and @

In French French, we also need AltGr for ~#{[|`^@]}€¤ but the worst part of it is that on a laptop keyboard, there is no key for < or >.

First thing I do on a new laptop is to install a custom keyboard layout. That said, using AltGr is no harder than using shift.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

cconroy:
re:me:

my "F" lock says "Func Loc". better than Tone Loc i guess.

Blasphemer! Nothing is better than Tone Loc! To make up for this egregious transgression, I humbly suggest that this site be renamed to The Daily WTFunkyColdMedina.

FunkyColdMedina? hmm. And here I thought he was just the voice of chestnut.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Sylver:
Alex:
Mason Wheeler:
DN:
ggeens:
Pretty sure we don't need that alternate graphic key anymore either.

I have a Danish/Norwegian keyboard, and I use AltGr all the time. I have to press it to type these characters: {}[]@£$€

{, }, [, ], @, and $ require a special alt on your keyboard? Ouch! Those are standard keys on the English layout...
I'm pretty sure the keys you have for those characters are replaced by accents that are actually useful in everyday typing for him.

Besides, it's better than French* keyboards. They need to use Shift in order to type a number.

*French french. Not your Friendly neighbourhood Canadians who have a much more sensible french Qwerty, which also needs AltGr for [,],{,} and @
In French French, we also need AltGr for ~#{[|`^@]}€¤ but the worst part of it is that on a laptop keyboard, there is no key for < or >.

First thing I do on a new laptop is to install a custom keyboard layout. That said, using AltGr is no harder than using shift.

Incidentally, AZERTY is actually the French word for "Developers can go fuck themselves".

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Keyper:
Any Intel based computer will go into a special diagnostic mode if you simultaneously hold the left control key, the right enter key (on the numeric pad) and press F8.

My nose hurts.

SQLDave · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Anonymous:
ggeens:
Anonymous:
GalacticCowboy:
Mine says
Prnt Scrn SysRq

Whatever that means...
Hard to believe that the system request key is almost 40 years old. Our keyboards are showing their age. Pretty sure we don't need that alternate graphic key anymore either.

Millions of Europeans beg to differ.
Like that's ever made a difference.

Morbius, is that you?

SQLDave · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

SeySayux:
Anonymous:
I've never understood why some people are unable to distinguish between their browser window and the content therein. They all have TVs so it's hardly an alien concept. If they saw a shot of some broken glass in a TV program, would they ring up their local repairman to get their "smashed screen" fixed? How do they even know they own a TV if they can't tell what part is the content and what part is the TV?
That is because for 90% of the people their higher level cortex shuts down as soon as you put them behind a computer.
The other 10%, whose higher level cortex never starts to begin with, ends up in IT.

FTFY

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

I didn't think of using my nose, now HR wants to talk to me...

Matt Westwood · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Rick:
SR:
I'd love to have supported Reality. The punnage would be endless.

I worked on a competing product to Reality, called UniVerse. When it crashed, its message was 'Fatal termination of UniVerse". No, really. Honest. Both products were versions of the Pick System, named after Dick Pick. No, really. Look it up in Wikipedia.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pick_operating_system

See.

We had a proprietary suite of programs for which, in order to access the system for a particular customer, you had to type BE <system> where <system> was what you wanted to be. If there was no such system, it would respond "No such thing as <system>".

For some reason I felt I had to enter "BE NORMAL" to which the response was "No such thing as NORMAL". My reaction, predictably was: yes, everyone knows that. And then I decided I wanted confirmation of my religious viewpoint, and entered "BE GOD".

In this case, the unexpected response was "There is only one God on this system and he does not appreciate impostors. Goodbye." I was logged out and could not log in again without abject grovelling to the IT team.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

wtf:
emmayche:
>My palm immediately and instinctively went to my forehead.
Now I know why I found the name "Palm Computing" so funny.

I always loved the term "Palm Pilot", until I learned it was a hand-held computing device and not another term for a useless wanker.

Brian Blessed concurs.

lolwtf · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Ozz:
The SysRq key does still serve a purpose - especially in *nix systems.

Well, only if you count Alt+SysRq+B.

ClaudeSuck.de · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

BramSmulders:
GalacticCowboy:
Anon:
PRT SC key

Well there's your problem. My keyboard has a key that is clearly marked "Print Scrn", but my laptop has "prt sc" (all lower case). I don't have a "PRT SC" key!

Mine says

Prnt Scrn SysRq

Whatever that means...
Mine says PageUp.

It never seems to do what it should do.

Never forget the phishers. The install a key that is similar to PRT SCR but it actually does something else.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Anonymous:
I've never understood why some people are unable to distinguish between their browser window and the content therein. They all have TVs so it's hardly an alien concept. If they saw a shot of some broken glass in a TV program, would they ring up their local repairman to get their "smashed screen" fixed? How do they even know they own a TV if they can't tell what part is the content and what part is the TV?

I was working on a Microsoft Surface unit (which sells to price of a small car), and set my screen to one of the "broken LCD" images. Hilarity ensued.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Telepathic Support was the same as Old New Thing Support, but what's Telephatic Support?

Seahen · 2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Anonymous:
If they saw a shot of some broken glass in a TV program, would they ring up their local repairman to get their "smashed screen" fixed?

He'd probably tell them their reality was corrupted, and they should destroy it by turning the TV off.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

After a grueling thirty-minute exercise of locating the Print Screen PRT SC key

Oh, the PRT key? Yeah, Finance uses that at work to calculate simple interest. Interest takes a lot of disk space.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

After a grueling thirty-minute exercise of locating the Print Screen PRT SC key

Oh, the PRT key? Yeah, Finance uses that at work to calculate simple interest. Interest takes a lot of disk space.

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Ben:
ggeens:
Anonymous:
GalacticCowboy:
Mine says
Prnt Scrn SysRq

Whatever that means...
Hard to believe that the system request key is almost 40 years old. Our keyboards are showing their age. Pretty sure we don't need that alternate graphic key anymore either.

Millions of Europeans beg to differ.

Uh oh, everybody hunker down, there's going to be an ineffectual UN resolution coming our way in five to ten years! Which we'll veto!

Should be plenty of time to bring democracy to a few more countries...

2010-07-01 Reply Admin

Sylver:
Anonymous:
GalacticCowboy:
Mine says
Prnt Scrn SysRq

Whatever that means...
Hard to believe that the system request key is almost 40 years old. Our keyboards are showing their age. Pretty sure we don't need that alternate graphic key anymore either.
Sure. Apart from a bunch of characters required in other languages and a bazillion shortcuts, there is no use whatsoever for AltGr.

Just because you don't need it doesn't mean that it is useless, you know.

No WAY!!

Never knew AltGr had an actual use... I always thought it was just a gray ALT key!!! Well, you learn something new every day...

2010-07-02 Reply Admin

Ben:
Uh oh, everybody hunker down, there's going to be an ineffectual UN resolution coming our way in five to ten years! Which we'll veto!

Nonsense!

That's time for you lot to propose at least a few thousand resolutions that China and Russia can veto, thus proving once and for all that they're evil because they veto UN resolutions.

If only they could be like the US and respect other nations, then we'd be fine.

2010-07-02 Reply Admin

anon:
Sylver:
In French French, we also need AltGr for ~#{[|`\^@]}€¤ but the worst part of it is that on a laptop keyboard, there is no key for < or >.
First thing I do on a new laptop is to install a custom keyboard layout. That said, using AltGr is no harder than using shift.

Incidentally, AZERTY is actually the French word for "Developers can go fuck themselves".

Your command of the French language is remarkable! Few people know about our extended definition system.

On the other end, you have to admit this word is tragically missing in the English language.

2010-07-02 Reply Admin

At least you Guys have a print Screen key, whatever it is called.

40 years in IT and I still can't find the "any" key I need to press to continue

:)

2010-07-02 Reply Admin

Sylver:
anon:
Sylver:
In French French, we also need AltGr for ~#{[|`\^@]}€¤ but the worst part of it is that on a laptop keyboard, there is no key for < or >.
First thing I do on a new laptop is to install a custom keyboard layout. That said, using AltGr is no harder than using shift.

Incidentally, AZERTY is actually the French word for "Developers can go fuck themselves".

Your command of the French language is remarkable! Few people know about our extended definition system.

On the other end, you have to admit this word is tragically missing in the English language.

We have to make do with the phrase "Visual Basic"

2010-07-02 Reply Admin

mdkendall:
Keyper:
Any Intel based computer will go into a special diagnostic mode if you simultaneously hold the left control key, the right enter key (on the numeric pad) and press F8.
My nose hurts.

[image]

2010-07-02 Reply Admin

Once again, we fall down from having our laugh at (bad) code that a "professional" committed - to having our laugh at the expense of users/non professionals. What next, mocking code committed by high school students?

Best regards

2010-07-02 Reply Admin

I can't see the screenshot, but at the end of the article, there is a Google homepage embedded.

It's not functioning though.

2010-07-02 Reply Admin

Bryan:
wow, it's almost as if the keyboard designers wanted make life difficult for programmers

Unfortunately for us (non-english) developers, most keyboards are NOT used by developers. And ordinary people do not use strange braces very often, but usually have to use the language-specific keys quite often. So for the majority, the language-specific keyboard layouts are quite usefull. Except the french layout of course, which must be some kind of cruel joke.

blatant_mcfakename · 2010-07-02 Reply Admin

jdw:
Code Refuser:
"I figured a screenshot was in order.
After a grueling thirty-minute exercise of locating the Print Screen PRT SC key, loading Paint, pasting, saving, and then emailing, I waited another few minutes for the rather large attachment to show up."

This is perhaps one of the only nice things about working in corporate IT, where you know that all of your users already have a remote control client installed on their machines.

Unless it's incredibly obvious what the problem is, I've gotten into the habit of just remoting into their machine right away and having them SHOW ME the problem. It really makes life a lot easier. Especially when there are a bunch of applications that I'm expected to support, yet really aren't all that familiar with myself.
It's not even a matter of being in corporate IT. We have an EchoVNC client that we usually use where I work, but if that doesn't work, we just have customers hit up ShowMyPC, or any of the other, similar sites out there.

Asking a customer/client/user to describe something they don't understand is a waste of time.

Problem is when you are doing support for the general public the problem description usually begins with 'I can't connect to the internet', which pretty much buggers up any chance of fixing it over a remote connection.

That said - I used to work for PC world tech support (I know... but bills need paying) and one bloke was shouting, ranting and occasionally swearing at me. I just sat and ignored him until he calm down - but he just went on and on... then he explained his masterplan

'You know - I'm on skype don't you? It's cheap so I can sit here calling you a c*nt all day if I want to'.

at this point I 'suddenly figured out what his problem might be' and suggested he pull the network cable out of the back of his PC to check the pins were okay.

'You're some kind of f**king idiot - but I'll try it just to.... <silence>'

2010-07-02 Reply Admin

I saw a Columbo once where he wanted a hard copy of a document so he pressed the 'Print Screen' button and a nearby printer immediately started printing. It wasnt until that moment that I truly realized the purpose of that button

Captch: acsi, superior to uincode

2010-07-02 Reply Admin

If there is one thing that programmers and IT types are good at it's taking a tiny thing and running a marathon with it. I love reading the WTF comments just to see which tangent they head in.

All this talk of keyboards though makes me wonder if I am the only one that uses "PF24" out of habit when giving people keystroke directions, and remembers using keyboards where that wasn't just a mapped button....

Reality Support, Telephatic Support, and New Thing Support

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