The Daily WTF: Curious Perversions in Information Technology

dohpaz42 · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

C-Octothorpe:
zunesis:
C-Octothorpe:
zunesis:
Even better

That actually is better (at least there is something being outputted as opposed to the silent scream of a caught exception), but you'll still get the compiler warning.

I meant "better" as in "more ironic" but whatever.

I realized that, but wasn't sure if you knew that your example (although technically wouldn't compile) was actually an improvement.

Anyway, excuse me while I reboot my sarcasm detector...

Make sure that you remove that pesky 'e' variable so that it builds faster when rebooting your sarcasm detector.

boog · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

dohpaz42:
boog:
Embarassingly enough, it eluded everybody that every error and exception would endure even after eliminating the pesky "e".
BUT, the point was not to fix the errors/exceptions, it was simply to remove the build warnings.

True, but I do have to point out that the article gives absolutely no indication that any end user ever complained about build warnings. So I do have to wonder why the developer's "solution" wasn't devised to fix the problems that the customer actually reported.

That's like hiring a mechanic to fix your car, but instead he just shits in the back seat.

Severity One · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

hoodaticus:
Yeah, I'm about as enterprisey as it gets. I've discovered that my code gets more maintainable when I have proper abstraction and domain models that describe my problems. And I've never seen non-enterprisey code that can read records from a database and package them into business objects, with exception logging, in a single line.

Depends on how long you are prepared your lines to be.

dohpaz42 · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

try {

boog:
dohpaz42:
boog:
Embarassingly enough, it eluded everybody that every error and exception would endure even after eliminating the pesky "e".
BUT, the point was not to fix the errors/exceptions, it was simply to remove the build warnings.
True, but I do have to point out that the article gives absolutely no indication that any end user ever complained about build warnings. So I do have to wonder why the developer's "solution" wasn't devised to fix the problems that the customer actually reported.
That's like hiring a mechanic to fix your car, but instead he just shits in the back seat.

} catch (Exception) { } finally { // @TODO: Fix-up for a future version }

C-Octothorpe · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

dohpaz42:
C-Octothorpe:
zunesis:
C-Octothorpe:
zunesis:
Even better

That actually is better (at least there is something being outputted as opposed to the silent scream of a caught exception), but you'll still get the compiler warning.

I meant "better" as in "more ironic" but whatever.

I realized that, but wasn't sure if you knew that your example (although technically wouldn't compile) was actually an improvement.

Anyway, excuse me while I reboot my sarcasm detector...

Make sure that you remove that pesky 'e' variable so that it builds faster when rebooting your sarcasm detector.

Well, that was the problem! I'm releasing a hotfix that will appropriately handle that problem.

catch(SarcasmOutOfBoundsExceptions) {
  // There! Thats better...
}

C-Octothorpe · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

boog:
dohpaz42:
boog:
Embarassingly enough, it eluded everybody that every error and exception would endure even after eliminating the pesky "e".
BUT, the point was not to fix the errors/exceptions, it was simply to remove the build warnings.
True, but I do have to point out that the article gives absolutely no indication that any end user ever complained about build warnings. So I do have to wonder why the developer's "solution" wasn't devised to fix the problems that the customer actually reported.
That's like hiring a mechanic to fix your car, but instead he just shits in the back seat.

I see we share the same mechanic... And that he likes his corn.

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

boog:
I do have to point out that the article gives absolutely no indication that any end user ever complained about build warnings. So I do have to wonder why the developer's "solution" wasn't devised to fix the problems that the customer actually reported.
That's like hiring a mechanic to fix your car, but instead he just shits in the back seat.

"...And thus the general clean-up began..."

Addressing compiler warnings was part of a general cleanup that involved address customer-reported problems that was prompted by customer-reported problems.

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

frits:
All this talk about "e" is going to attract all of those discotheque-crazy Europeans from yesterday's comment thread.

I thought the disco's and the trancers always wanted something called "x"

KattMan · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

CoderHero:
frits:
All this talk about "e" is going to attract all of those discotheque-crazy Europeans from yesterday's comment thread.
I thought the disco's and the trancers always wanted something called "x"

You are so far behind the times man. E is the new term, x is so 90's.

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

C-Octothorpe:
boog:
That's like hiring a mechanic to fix your car, but instead he just shits in the back seat.

I see we share the same mechanic... And that he likes his corn.

That's nothing!

Mine shoves it in the air duct so it bakes in the summer heat, and then I turn on the AC.....

....The horrid smell causes me to throw up all over myself, and since I'm not watching were I'm going, I run into a pole and smack my face on the steering wheel and start bleeding....

...so there I am, bleeding, covered in vomit and smelling like shit in the middle rush-hour traffic right in front of my buddies from work and the hot chick from HR. The whole situation is so embarrassing I start sobbing uncontrollably....

...so there I am, bleeding, covered in vomit and smelling like shit, and crying like a little girl when a cop pulls me over. At that point I just feel so alone in the world that I want to get out and give him a hug, but he doesn't want to come anywhere near me or my shitty-smelling car so he just sticks his taser out his car's window and zaps me from thirty feet away while finishing his coffee...

...so here I am, bleeding, covered in vomit and smelling like shit, and crying like a little girl in a holding cell with some really hairy guy giving me eyes and this is my only phone call I get - PLEASE HELP!

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

KattMan:
CoderHero:
frits:
All this talk about "e" is going to attract all of those discotheque-crazy Europeans from yesterday's comment thread.
I thought the disco's and the trancers always wanted something called "x"

You are so far behind the times man. E is the new term, x is so 90's.

You are so far behind the times man. Krokodil is the new thing, "E" is so 10's

boog · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

zunesis:
boog:
I do have to point out that the article gives absolutely no indication that any end user ever complained about build warnings. So I do have to wonder why the developer's "solution" wasn't devised to fix the problems that the customer actually reported.
That's like hiring a mechanic to fix your car, but instead he just shits in the back seat.
"...And thus the general clean-up began..."

Addressing compiler warnings was part of a general cleanup that involved address customer-reported problems that was prompted by customer-reported problems.

"of course, we're still rife with 'unexpected behaviors', but at least there won't be any build warnings..."

I stand by my unpleasant analogy.

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

I think I work at this company... :(

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

boog:
zunesis:
boog:
I do have to point out that the article gives absolutely no indication that any end user ever complained about build warnings. So I do have to wonder why the developer's "solution" wasn't devised to fix the problems that the customer actually reported.
That's like hiring a mechanic to fix your car, but instead he just shits in the back seat.
"...And thus the general clean-up began..."

Addressing compiler warnings was part of a general cleanup that involved address customer-reported problems that was prompted by customer-reported problems.
"of course, we're still rife with 'unexpected behaviors', but at least there won't be any build warnings..."

I stand by my unpleasant analogy.

The developers didn't make things messier by removing compiler warnings, they just though that removing the warning would fix the problem (maybe).

It's more like the mechanic doesn't know what to do, so he just takes the vehicle to a car wash.

On the other hand, the shitting in the back seat does make for more interesting discussion.

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

appellatio - blowing an apple?

KattMan · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

zunesis:
On the other hand, the shitting in the back seat does make for more interesting discussion.

Hey I got to drop a log, where are you parked?

C-Octothorpe · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

zunesis:
...so here I am, bleeding, covered in vomit and smelling like shit, and crying like a little girl in a holding cell with some really hairy guy giving me the hug I so badly wanted and this is my only phone call I get - PLEASE SEND LUBE!

FTFY

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

hoodaticus:
zunesis:
hoodaticus:
The Nerve:
Fixed?
try { 
    DoProcessReceipts();
}
catch (Exception e) { 
  Console.WriteLine("Error");
}
FTFY
Even better
You still get the warning that way, dummy. It should obviously be:
try { 
    DoProcessReceipts();
}
catch (Exception e) { 
  MsgBox(e.ToString());
}
...especially on a server.

But if there is an error, dont you want to retry till it works?

public void TheProcess() {
  try { 
      DoProcessReceipts();
  }
  catch (Exception e) { 
    MsgBox(e.ToString());
    TheProcess();
  }
}

KattMan · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

ExceptionHandler:
But if there is an error, dont you want to retry till it works?
public void TheProcess() {
  try { 
      DoProcessReceipts();
  }
  catch (Exception e) { 
    MsgBox(e.ToString());
    TheProcess();
  }
}

?

But how do you get out of the never ending recursion? Stack overflow baby! Yeah!

hoodaticus · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Gary:
I use this pattern all the time in javascript. Maybe I'm looping through an array and want to do something (call methods, change properties) that only some of the elements have. I'm too lazy to inspect each one, so I'll just try and catch.

TRWTF is Javascript. So ugly, so necessary.

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Hey, did Alex stop doing the blue comments or what?

C-Octothorpe · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Gone for a While:
Hey, did Alex stop doing the blue comments or what?

No, it's just that nobody here posts comments that are worth blueing.

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

C-Octothorpe:
Gone for a While:
Hey, did Alex stop doing the blue comments or what?

No, it's just that nobody here posts comments that are worth blueing.

That's not true. I've read several here today that made me spew green tea out my oral orifice. And I was drinking coffee!

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Captcha: acsi - Acsi stupid question, get a stupid Ansi

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

TRWTF is Exceptions, they slow down your code severely ^^ turns off RTTI

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Gone for a While:
That's not true. I've read several here today that made me spew green tea out my oral orifice.
And I was drinking coffee!

So the comments are so disgusting that you threw up the green tea you drank earlier?

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Gone for a While:
That's not true. I've read several here today that made me spew green tea out my oral orifice.

It's not your oral orifice I'm interested in. Come here, pretty!

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Wow! Perhaps there would also be a market for an automated warning removal tool. Though I would be ashamed to write such a thing.

C-Octothorpe · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

zunesis:
Gone for a While:
That's not true. I've read several here today that made me spew green tea out my oral orifice.
And I was drinking coffee!

So the comments are so disgusting that you threw up the green tea you drank earlier?

That sounds about right...

Mcoder · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

KattMan:
ExceptionHandler:
But if there is an error, dont you want to retry till it works?
public void TheProcess() {
  try { 
      DoProcessReceipts();
  }
  catch (Exception e) { 
    MsgBox(e.ToString());
    TheProcess();
  }
}
?
But how do you get out of the never ending recursion? Stack overflow baby! Yeah!

Oh, came-on. Of course the stack overflow will raise an exception. You hadle the exception then (the snipet already showed how to handle exceptions).

You, people, miss the obvious.

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Mcoder:
Oh, came-on. Of course the stack overflow will raise an exception. You hadle the exception then (the snipet already showed how to handle exceptions).
You, people, miss the obvious.

StackOverflowException Class

...

Version Considerations

In prior versions of the .NET Framework, your application could catch a StackOverflowException object (for example, to recover from unbounded recursion). However, that practice is currently discouraged because significant additional code is required to reliably catch a stack overflow exception and continue program execution.

Starting with the .NET Framework version 2.0, a StackOverflowException object cannot be caught by a try-catch block and the corresponding process is terminated by default. Consequently, users are advised to write their code to detect and prevent a stack overflow. For example, if your application depends on recursion, use a counter or a state condition to terminate the recursive loop. Note that an application that hosts the common language runtime (CLR) can specify that the CLR unload the application domain where the stack overflow exception occurs and let the corresponding process continue. For more information, see ICLRPolicyManager Interface and Hosting Overview.

Windows 95, Windows 98, Windows 98 Second Edition, Windows Millennium Edition Platform Note: A thrown StackOverflowException cannot be caught by a try-catch block. Consequently, the exception causes the process to terminate immediately.

PS: RTFM

C-Octothorpe · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Mcoder:
KattMan:
ExceptionHandler:
But if there is an error, dont you want to retry till it works?
public void TheProcess() {
  try { 
      DoProcessReceipts();
  }
  catch (Exception e) { 
    MsgBox(e.ToString());
    TheProcess();
  }
}
?
But how do you get out of the never ending recursion? Stack overflow baby! Yeah!
Oh, came-on. Of course the stack overflow will raise an exception. You hadle the exception then (the snipet already showed how to handle exceptions).

You, people, miss the obvious.

You can't catch a stack overflow (at least not in .net). It's funny that in trying to make the code worse, some people unintentionally make it better...

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

C-Octothorpe:
zunesis:
...so here I am, bleeding, covered in vomit and smelling like shit, and crying like a little girl in a holding cell with some really hairy guy giving me the hug I so badly wanted and this is my only phone call I get - PLEASE SEND LUBE!

FTFY

Ha ha! I'm so glad we're friends again, C-Octo.

You complete me.

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

C-Octothorpe:
Mcoder:
KattMan:
ExceptionHandler:
But if there is an error, dont you want to retry till it works?
public void TheProcess() {
  try { 
      DoProcessReceipts();
  }
  catch (Exception e) { 
    MsgBox(e.ToString());
    TheProcess();
  }
}
?
But how do you get out of the never ending recursion? Stack overflow baby! Yeah!
Oh, came-on. Of course the stack overflow will raise an exception. You hadle the exception then (the snipet already showed how to handle exceptions).

You, people, miss the obvious.
You can't catch a stack overflow (at least not in .net). It's funny that in trying to make the code worse, some people unintentionally make it better...

I'm actually speaking out of school here. I don't know the first thing about funny. I do know how to be the number one poster (in volume) on TDWTF articles, though.

Yay me.

hoodaticus · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Severity One:
hoodaticus:
Yeah, I'm about as enterprisey as it gets. I've discovered that my code gets more maintainable when I have proper abstraction and domain models that describe my problems. And I've never seen non-enterprisey code that can read records from a database and package them into business objects, with exception logging, in a single line.
Depends on how long you are prepared your lines to be.

1920 pixels, dude!

DbConnection.ForEach("SELECT * FROM blah WHERE key=@key", r=>{/do stuff to each record here/}, new SqlParameter("@key", key);

C-Octothorpe · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

hoodaticus:
Severity One:
hoodaticus:
Yeah, I'm about as enterprisey as it gets. I've discovered that my code gets more maintainable when I have proper abstraction and domain models that describe my problems. And I've never seen non-enterprisey code that can read records from a database and package them into business objects, with exception logging, in a single line.
Depends on how long you are prepared your lines to be.
1920 pixels, dude!
DbConnection.ForEach("SELECT * FROM blah WHERE key=@key", r=>{/do stuff to each record here/}, new SqlParameter("@key", key);

Is the "do stuff to each record here" i++, because if it is, I think I've seen your work here before. :P

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

C-Octothorpe:
hoodaticus:
Severity One:
hoodaticus:
Yeah, I'm about as enterprisey as it gets. I've discovered that my code gets more maintainable when I have proper abstraction and domain models that describe my problems. And I've never seen non-enterprisey code that can read records from a database and package them into business objects, with exception logging, in a single line.
Depends on how long you are prepared your lines to be.
1920 pixels, dude!
DbConnection.ForEach("SELECT * FROM blah WHERE key=@key", r=>{/do stuff to each record here/}, new SqlParameter("@key", key);

Is the "do stuff to each record here" i++, because if it is, I think I've seen your work here before. :P

I'm pretty sure that both of these statements indicate why neither of you have a job.

Mcoder · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

zunesis:
Mcoder:
Oh, came-on. Of course the stack overflow will raise an exception. You hadle the exception then (the snipet already showed how to handle exceptions).
You, people, miss the obvious.

StackOverflowException Class

...

Version Considerations

In prior versions of the .NET Framework, your application could catch a StackOverflowException object (for example, to recover from unbounded recursion). However, that practice is currently discouraged because significant additional code is required to reliably catch a stack overflow exception and continue program execution.

Starting with the .NET Framework version 2.0, a StackOverflowException object cannot be caught by a try-catch block and the corresponding process is terminated by default....

PS: RTFM

Yeah, I should have RTFM! I couldn't imagine one could actualy catch a stack overflow at earlier versions of .Net.

Sorry, I was trying to write nonsense, I couldn't expect reality to comply.

Matt Westwood · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

zunesis:
C-Octothorpe:
boog:
That's like hiring a mechanic to fix your car, but instead he just shits in the back seat.

I see we share the same mechanic... And that he likes his corn.

That's nothing!

Mine shoves it in the air duct so it bakes in the summer heat, and then I turn on the AC.....

....The horrid smell causes me to throw up all over myself, and since I'm not watching were I'm going, I run into a pole and smack my face on the steering wheel and start bleeding....

...so there I am, bleeding, covered in vomit and smelling like shit in the middle rush-hour traffic right in front of my buddies from work and the hot chick from HR. The whole situation is so embarrassing I start sobbing uncontrollably....

...so there I am, bleeding, covered in vomit and smelling like shit, and crying like a little girl when a cop pulls me over. At that point I just feel so alone in the world that I want to get out and give him a hug, but he doesn't want to come anywhere near me or my shitty-smelling car so he just sticks his taser out his car's window and zaps me from thirty feet away while finishing his coffee...

...so here I am, bleeding, covered in vomit and smelling like shit, and crying like a little girl in a holding cell with some really hairy guy giving me eyes and this is my only phone call I get - PLEASE HELP!

Er, okay, I have a razor you can lend him (his hairiness seems to upset you), that may enhance the experience for you ...

boog · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Anonymous:
Wow! Perhaps there would also be a market for an automated warning removal tool. Though I would be ashamed to write such a thing.

Ashamed? Or financially-endowed?

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Matt Westwood:
zunesis:
C-Octothorpe:
boog:
That's like hiring a mechanic to fix your car, but instead he just shits in the back seat.

I see we share the same mechanic... And that he likes his corn.

That's nothing!

Mine shoves it in the air duct so it bakes in the summer heat, and then I turn on the AC.....

....The horrid smell causes me to throw up all over myself, and since I'm not watching were I'm going, I run into a pole and smack my face on the steering wheel and start bleeding....

...so there I am, bleeding, covered in vomit and smelling like shit in the middle rush-hour traffic right in front of my buddies from work and the hot chick from HR. The whole situation is so embarrassing I start sobbing uncontrollably....

...so there I am, bleeding, covered in vomit and smelling like shit, and crying like a little girl when a cop pulls me over. At that point I just feel so alone in the world that I want to get out and give him a hug, but he doesn't want to come anywhere near me or my shitty-smelling car so he just sticks his taser out his car's window and zaps me from thirty feet away while finishing his coffee...

...so here I am, bleeding, covered in vomit and smelling like shit, and crying like a little girl in a holding cell with some really hairy guy giving me eyes and this is my only phone call I get - PLEASE HELP!

Er, okay, I have a razor you can lend him (his hairiness seems to upset you), that may enhance the experience for you ...

Well, if it's going to happen ("It's going to happen" he said) he might as well be definitely male so it doesn't confuse me latter in life, amirite?

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

boog:
Anonymous:
Wow! Perhaps there would also be a market for an automated warning removal tool. Though I would be ashamed to write such a thing.
Ashamed? Or financially-endowed?

...And with that money, maybe you could get an operation and be so well endowed as to be able to make a woman out of yourself. Then you could be the fucker and the fuckee - it's the ultimate in masturbation!

C-Octothorpe · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

zunesis:
boog:
Anonymous:
Wow! Perhaps there would also be a market for an automated warning removal tool. Though I would be ashamed to write such a thing.
Ashamed? Or financially-endowed?
...And with that money, maybe you could get an operation and be so well endowed as to be able to make a woman out of yourself. Then you could be the fucker and the fuckee - it's the ultimate in masturbation!

Oh wow, dude. Wrong forum...

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

C-Octothorpe:
zunesis:
...And with that money, maybe you could get an operation and be so well endowed as to be able to make a woman out of yourself. Then you could be the fucker and the fuckee - it's the ultimate in masturbation!
Oh wow, dude. Wrong forum...

Why won't you love me?!?!?!?!

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Mcoder:
Oh, [I] came-on [myself]. Of course the stack [of] overflow[ing] [shit] will raise [my] exception[al] [penis]. You [get straped in the sad]dle [and] the exception[al penis] then snipe[s you in the ass, wait I] already showed [you] how to handle [my] exception[al penis]).
You [lovely] people, miss [my] ob[long dong].

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

boog:
True, but I do have to [eat] out that [ug-a-mug mother of mine] art[fully, she] gives absolutely no indication [when] any end [to her] ever[-flowing stream of cum, but] complain[s] about [arthritis] [without] warning. So I do have to wonder why [my mom's] "[final] solution" wasn't devised to fix the [sexual identity] problems that [her son (ME!!!)] actually reported.
That's like hiring a mechanic to fix your car, but instead [s]he just shits [o]n the back [of your head].

method1 · 2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Justice:
C-Octothorpe:
the silent scream of a caught exception

Is that a concept from Lovecraft-Driven Development (LDD)?

Come to think of it, the majority of code seems to be based on primal terror.

+1 What a fucking excellent idea for a new programming paradigm. I use the Burroughs Nova Express IDE myself, that chops your codebase into little pieces & sticks them back together in a random order, then administers a large dose of the opiate of your choice.

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

boog:
Embarassingly enough, it eluded everybody that every error and exception would endure even after eliminating the pesky "e".

[image]

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

boog:
Anonymous:
Wow! Perhaps there would also be a market for an automated warning removal tool. Though I would be ashamed to write such a thing.
Ashamed? Or financially-endowed?

Both

2011-07-06 Reply Admin

Martin D:
boog:
Embarassingly enough, it eluded everybody that every error and exception would endure even after eliminating the pesky "e".
[image]

I, for one, prefer to have jokes explained to me.

The Pesky "e"

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