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Admin
Holy crap, not even xXx agent whould solve this mess ;)
Just a sweeeeeet wtf!!
Admin
Reminds me of those cool steganography challenges from when i was young. Find the message!
Admin
How can you know for sure? It's not like we are laking the necessary amount of idiocy here (let me just mention "Ortstafelstreit").
Admin
Or for that matter the combination of Postgresql, Apache and CGI.pm/DBI.pm which also cost nothing if you already have a computer to run it on (normal desktop computer with 160G disc will work a long time for you unless your data amounts are in the order of WallMart of Google..)
All the above will run both on M$ or Linux (i prefer the Linux solution as is is more stable in my experience and can easier be remote administrated + beeing free as in beer)
Yours Yazeran
Plan: To go to Mars one day with a hammer..
Admin
Sorry the above should have included this post (and now i understands why people are so mad about this forum software..)
can be the best solution in a particular situation. If you're going to waste tens of thousands of dollars on SQL Server/Oracle backend Java/.Net frontend for an independant 5-10 user lightweight database application when MS Office is already installed and standard then it's a good thing you're coding and not making management decisions.
Yes, because MS Access with a tightly integrated VB "app" is much better than getting:
Java (price: free)
Some sort of IDE for Java if you wish (price: free)
MySQL (as much as this is bad mouthed on here, I'd way rather use this than MS Access) (price: free)
If cost is the primary concern, Access still isn't the best way to go. As far as I know, MS Access comes with Office which isn't free.
Also, I've never seen an app like that that didn't eventually need to be scaled. And that's so much harder with Access and it's VB language than if you had developed it with another technology in the first place. I'm not a Java fan really but it's much better than some alternatives.
As for the WTF itself, I also give up. How the hell-ass does this abomination work?
Admin
Duh. Obviously, the author was one of the X-Men!
Admin
If you don't have too much data to store, you can even get Oracle for free.
Comparable offerings are available from most database vendors, e.g. MS (already mentioned), Sybase, DB2.
Admin
Another WTF is that he is not using a fix-space font for displaying the table's contents (see rows with IDs "N7", "N9", and "P1") so it may be hard to tell on which position an "x" or a blank is set.
Admin
Intelligent people don't watch action movies.
Admin
Obviously this is an RPG programmer who likes the concept of column-dependent source format and thinks this should also be used in database desgin.
The only WTF is that he didn't used any of the other 25 letters he could have.
It would make the software more flexible.
Admin
Is there a statistic to support that or is it just your opinion?
Admin
I think I'll just go whimper now.
After sending this to my database guy so he can share the torment.
There is something bizarrely significant about the fact that my captcha is "zork" but at 4 am, I couldn't say what it is.
Admin
And if someone within the group is dim enough to not get it, then all the better.
Long live MST3K!
Admin
I don't understand. My company uses an Access database for their website, and some of the pages that I have written query the database using SQL, and I've never picked up an Access-specific reference. I use Martin Gruber's SQL Instant Reference for SQL89, SQL92, and SQL99.
The following query runs just fine:
<font face="Courier New" size="2">SELECT date,title,body FROM dates INNER JOIN events ON dates.ID = events.ID WHERE body LIKE %product%</font>
As for dates, they can either be passed as #MM/DD/YYYY# (which could lead to difficulty, given that different locales tend to reverse months and days), or by serial date (which in VB is easily retrieved by using CDbl on a DateTime variable).
The only valid argument I have against Access is its speed. Even with a moderately sized database, it lags a little more than is acceptable for driving a website (as my company uses it). Of course, that's far from the smallest WTF when it comes to my company and technology...for example, even static content pages are retrieved from multiple databases, and any number of pages connect to and query databases, but never use the results. Of course, the people who created these pages believe that these pointless queries are essential to the functioning of the pages.
<font face="Courier New" size="1">Captcha = initech</font>
Admin
How did you know the columns go to DATA52? Its not on the pic - is it your DB??
Admin
I would put my money on GoatCheez - I think he has worked it out - Although I do not agree with the 'OBVIOUSLY' in his comments.
Seems like a very strange way to 'generate' reports though, as the owner does not know if he sold the same item twice on that day....
Congrats GoatCheez!
Admin
who'll win in this tic-tac-toe?! ^_^ WTF!
Admin
That may beso, but they still are different kinds of WTF's. Anyone can use MS Access in a production system. The table design is a stroke of (evil) genius.
Admin
AM I the first one to see the obvious? These are the X-Files!
Admin
The real WTF is that some idiots persist in mistaking Access for a database. It's not, it's a database front-end that can be used either with Microsoft JET or with SQL Server. And as a front-end, it's actually pretty damn good.
Incidentally, the "Access tables should be denormalized" idiot above is talking out of his arse. For the kind of small database for which JET is suitable, properly normalized tables work just fine in Access; joins (which Access supported with the ANSI SQL syntax long before supposedly better systems like Oracle did!) run beautifully fast, and I have never noticed any performance issues related to databases being stored in 3NF. I have, indeed, noticed databases speed up considerably when I come in and break the single Excel-like table some amateur has created up into a set of properly related tables.
Admin
Player1: Kay-too, Data-three
Player2: You sunk my battleship!!
-dZ.
Admin
The real WTF is to use a string to store a bitmask. But maybe the integer values on Access are not long enough to store 32 bits (or whatever the original programer need).
Also is a WTF to use bitmask with a database. The speed bonus of a database is totally nuked by the need to encode/uncode prior to use. And you are mostly unable to search for values( "WHERE DATA4 & 0x4" ).
You code like that for videogames, OS level software, data structures for files (images, sound, etc)... but for bussiness software you use proper 4N databases, with a single cell for a single dataitem.
--Tei
Admin
Dear GoatCheez,
I am a software developer who enjoys reading this site. I'm an ordinary guy.
I'm also a Scientologist.
The link in your signature is offensive to me. It contains desctructive lies.
Scientology actually does enormous amounts of help for many people, myself included.
I kindly ask that, out of courtesy, you remove the link from your signature.
It would be much appreciated.
Thank you,
Stewart
Admin
Oh I dunno....maybe size was a priority over speed in this case? Being a video games programmer, I've had to make many choices like that, esepcially when working on a VERY limited platform like Nintendo handhelds. I would imagine that on a small system, storage space would be quite a concern.
But excuse my retardness in profesional I.T. matters here...that is one horrendous database.
Admin
Ya know, I hadn't even noticed the link, but when you mentioned it, I had to scroll back to look. Shocking stuff, glad you pointed it out or I wouldn't have known about those things. I never knew how far Scientology would go...
Admin
Harald? Is that yours?
Admin
Ok, frankly I'm stumped... Normally I can spot ironic/sarcastic/fake/plain funny posts, but this I just can't judge correctly...
I actually thinks it's for real...
Or perhaps not... WTF!?!
Admin
Take a look at my first comment where I said "with exception of relationships", that pretty much negates your relational integrity argument. Good point about SQL though, I guess when I work in Access (which isn't often anymore, thank God) I don't expect to write SQL by hand. I probably wouldn't want to either, since it would corrupt me. Ever try to create an Autonumber field via DDL in Access? Pretty nasty and non-intuitive. I once had the unfortunate pleasure of working on a website where the backend was Access. The only way I could modify the damn thing without taking the site down, was to embed DDL/SQL in an ASP webpage and browsing to it. I don't wish that on anyone.
Admin
This is an appeal to courtesy and decency.
If Goatscheez had an anti-christianity or we-hate-islam link in his signature, most people would agree that that would be inappropriate for thedailywtf.com.
I have seen on this site before an inappropriate signature criticised.
I find it a complete WTF some of the things that are claimed about Scientology, and that these claims are so easily believed. But that's not my point, my point is that here is not the place to bring the subject up, or event reference it. Otherwise this isn't blog about technical WTF's anymore...
I enjoy this site, but don't enjoy seeing a subject that has done so much to help me be bashed around. There are other blogs for this kind of thing, surely?
Admin
Dijkstra considered harmful?
Admin
While I agree that this isn't the place for a religion-bashing discussion, no matter the religion at question (including Pastafarianism or Last Thursdayism), I have to disagree with the comment about someone's signature.
Until someone replied to the signature, it was an unobtrusive, mostly over-looked link at the bottom of someone's posts, clearly separate from the posts themselves. I see no problem with such off-topic signature lines, so long as the hosting post is appropriate to the forum.
That said, let's get back to the issue at hand: a database full of well-spaced X's...WTF?
Admin
Sorry Stewart, but you need to get out of Scientology ASAP. The only people in it are marks and con-artists. And if you believe any of the crap they're spouting, I don't want you anywhere near any code that does anything important, ever. 95 Million year old galactic empire and exploding volcanoes indeed.
Admin
The link in your signature is offensive to me.
So don't follow it. Lots of people hold or proselytise beliefs that are anathema to me. Complaining about a link is verging on the absurd, though.
Admin
lpope -- I sincerely hope you are joking around. Because you read somewhere that Access sometimes doesn't efficiently hash join tables when constructing a query plan, that means that you should not design normalized Access databases? you feel that relationships are the only difference between Access and Excel? How about formal table definitions with indexes, enforced data types, constraints, primary keys, referential integrrity (with cascading support long before it was available for SQL Server), linked ODBC tables, the form and report tools (*way* different and better than what you get with generic VBA or VB forms with data binding, subforms, continuous forms, data grids, etc),object level security, SQL queries with support for outer joins, grouping, aggregates, unions, DAO, ADO, etc .... Do you really think Excel has all those and there is no difference between Access and Excel spreadsheets ???? Are you kidding me? Maybe when *you* use Access, you use it as if it were just a bunch of Excel spreadsheets, but nothing about Access forces you to or implies that you should. And that is your own fault for not using the product correctly.
Your little example demonstrates that in the past you had trouble doing a few very simple things with Access when you clearly had no idea how to use it .... in fact you were trying to use it as a backend to a website, all the more reason to think that is must be a "bad database that is just like Excel with relationships" since that is not what it is designed to do !!! . But if you ever actually learned how to use it properly, and used it for the right situation, you might actually be surprised.
I am not sure what is worse -- beginner programmers using complicated languages and creating WTF's, or "expert" programmers using the simplier tools like Access and refusing to learn how they work and constantly complaining and whining about them and making excuses for their crappy code (i.e., "Of course my code sucks, I used Access! I had no choice!") ..... I am so sick and tired of people using that excuse instead of taking the time to learn the product they are using and to make the best of it. That's what a good programmer will do in any language they need to work in.
Admin
Ahh! a write only database. Reminds me of my Perl days...
Admin
Or 26 columns? Could be six-monthly accounts :)
Admin
What you have to remember... is that not everybody have access to SQL Server 2000 to make things work. They have Access that they bought with their Office version and that's all.
However, MSAccess is perfect for small company with not a lot of ressource but that deseperatly need some database to work with.
I think that Access is better than an "homemade-CSV-database". At least it have basic DB functionallity
Admin
Your post is offensive to me.
Admin
I should add to my prior post: Of course Access isn't perfect. It isn't a database server, the OS file system is used to directly access the MDB file, so of course once multiple processes try to use that file things get slow and ugly. JET SQL certainly isn't perfect, and it does use VBA instead of VB.NET which would be a huge and welcome improvement. And, of course, it can be quirky sometimes. But, come on, don't be ignorant and say things like is "one of the worst databases" or that it is basically "just like Excel", it makes you sound pretty silly.
In terms of being a front end, it is an excellent front end for a databse, and it makes the ultimate "conversion tool" -- you get local storage, ODBC linked tables that are read/write, forms, reporting, VBA, and so on all in 1 package. It's the only tool I use for that purpose. For data analysis, it is excellent as well. For data entry applications, it is quite powerful and the data binding features for forms (i.e., bound multi-column combo boxes and list boxes, sub-forms, continuous data forms, plus ActiveX controls or whatever else you want to add in) along with the reporting and VBA support make it a million times easier to write robust front-ends for databases rather than using most other languages. This, of couse, causes many WTF's out there since it is pretty easy to use and lots of people create some pretty scary things. But in the right hands, if you know what you are doing, you can write very robust little apps very quickly. Ironically, most "hard-core" programmers hate it because of this.
Admin
I was trying to be humorous.... although I don't doubt that what I said was what was actually going on.... Seriously though, there's no way I was 100% correct... the OBIVOUSLY remarks were for humor, of course ;-P. I mentioned that he probably had another table for tracking purchase quantity... hmm... maybe the ID's are actually customer ID's? I dunno.... damn thing is WHACK lol.
I have removed the scientology link from my signature, although the reason I removed it was for fear of them, not because I think it is an offensive or inaccurate link. That organization has quite alot of power, and I happen to live right by the spiritual headquartes. I would say more, but I just don't want to wake up at 4:00am in the middle of the Gulf with a pair of concrete shoes if ya know what I mean...
Admin
I hadn't even noticed the link. Thanks for pointing it out.
I note that the page in question contains references to verifiable facts, whereas your reply contains only vague, unsubstantiated assertions. If you research the facts, using information from sources not edited by Scientology, you may discover that Scientology has not been telling you the full truth.
People could also link to Operation Clambake, as they have a wealth of well-researched information. It is not designed to be shocking like the previous site, but is still very informative.
ObWTF: Maybe it's a roguelike game? The user has to navigate around the maze of Xs, searching for the treasur^H^H^H^H^H^H^Hproducts.
Admin
I appreciate your response GoatCheez. Thank you.
For what it's worth, I did actually find your post quite funny, obviously.
And for the record, I don't "believe" anything on faith, especially not second or third hand reports from an unverifiable source. As for beliefs or attitudes attributed to me by others who do believe (unquestioningly?) what they read in the newspapers or on the internet, would they choose to believe me if I said "that's not true" ?
As for my code, well, you will find my code in British Airways' pricing batch processing, CMG Admiral's (now Logica CMG) Oil division, extensively in lastminute.com's flights and carhire sections and other places. If you think a person's choice of spiritual viewpoint affects their code, well, you're stuffed, because I've worked with Jews, Muslims, Sikhs, Hindus, Jehovah's Witnesses, agnostics and revoked-born-again-Christians, amongst others, and their code was not bad at all.
So I think the WTF factor displayed by so many must be found elsewhere ...
[captcha = 'genius'] LOL
Admin
Admin
Absolutely none.
BASIC != Assembly.
learnt != word.
Maybe you mistook the basic you were programming on your TI-83 to be Assembly? You CAN program in assembly on TI graphing calcs, and they all use the Z80 except the 92 and 89 (those use the 68k iirc). You CANNOT compile Z80 assembly on the calculator, you need to use a computer. The programming language on those calculators is a form of BASIC.
Oh yah, I TOTALLY agree with Dijkstra, he knows what he's talking about ;-P
Admin
I understand Dijkstra.
What Dijkstra think is good programing:
int yadda(){
whatever()
if (foo())
bar();
}
What dijkstra hate of BASIC. Code like this one:
blah
blah
blah
blah
:label1
blah
blah
gosub sub1
blah
blah
if A=3 then goto label1
blah
blah
blah
blah
blah
blah
blah
sub
blah
if A=9 then goto label1
blah
blah
blah
blah
blah
blah
blah
blah
return
Theres still people that code like that. But actually VB is good enough, so you can blame the programmer, not the language.
--Tei
Admin
*peers at hook and swims in the other direction*
Admin
Oh wow... I had NO idea it was proper english in Britan. My bad.
Admin
I know what it is... It's called life... and it's a game..
Admin
Highlight done by me
So, you appreciate that people are scared by your sect?
This makes me believe the content of the now removed link was accurate.
Admin
Ala "The Pirates of the Carribean", the Xs show where there is buried treasure! (or Rum).