The Daily WTF: Curious Perversions in Information Technology

chron3 · 2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Nagesh:
It is better to use some DB like MySQL instead of Access. Access makes everything difficult later. Also SQL Server is not shabby considering support available. Most easy to setup. Please consider free version of SQL Server or Oracle Express edition, if mySQL is too tough to comprend. before touching access with a pole.

Yeah right, quit bragging about your local tech support calls...

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Anonymous:
Abso:
Remy Porter:
I'm not sure what you actually mean...
Oh, sure, go around providing counter-examples on me.
In light of that, I suppose what I mean is that I'm a whiner who can't pay attention and who should just write a greasemonkey script to hide that button already.
A greasemonkey script? How about just remembering to use the quote button instead the reply button? Gloves, man, gloves.

Because that would require an ability to pay attention, while this only took two minutes. The two minutes were easier to acquire. (It's not my fault. TV ruined my attention span.)

This concludes my whiny complaints; I now return you to your previously scheduled trolling.

Matt Westwood · 2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Lone Marauder:
Anonymous:
Having a pretty poster on your wall does not make you CMMI compliant. You do realise that CMM and CMMI are separate models that require separate appraisals, don't you? Compliance with CMM does not automatically make you compliant with CMMI. You need to go through the whole appraisal process again and the process areas have been considerably expanded so it's far harder than gaining CMM compliance. It sounds like your company are working to a completely obsolete standard.

YHBT. YHL. HAND.

http://encyclopediadramatica.com/YHBT

YHBT is an acronym for "You Have Been Trolled". Frequently followed by YHL (You Have Lost), the more elegant YHL HAND (You Have Lost, Have A Nice Day) or the more hostile YHL FOAD (You Have Lost, Fuck Off And Die). Used by noobs to indicate notable pwnage. It was coined by Kibo in 1994, making this exceedingly old. Later popularized by the Usenet newsgroup alt.fan.warlord.

Matt Westwood · 2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Fred:
An Old Hacker:
QJ:
dogbrags:
If it aint broke don't fix it. There are still millions (billions?) of lines of cobol code running mission-critical apps, that haven't changed in decades. Hows that for scary?

A job I recently left had me maintaining FORTRAN that I wrote some 20 years before because I was the only one left in the company who knows FORTRAN. They never replaced it with new technology because it was such a well-designed and bug-free system. But now I've left they may have to.

#1 rule of system maintainability: If you cannot maintain it, it is broken.

So congratulations, you spent twenty years maintaining an app that broke in the worst way the day you left.
Yeah, I think I know that Fortran guy, because I work on the team he just left. First, we haven't replaced his position, because he didn't do anything whatsoever in the last 3 years he was here. Second, his idea of version control was to tar up his entire 150 megabyte directory structure once every couple months or so. Yeah, his code is still running, but we are so replacing it with an industry standard module as soon as we can cut the tentacles it wove into practically everything in sight.

+1 QFT

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

For anyone fortunate enough to not be as familiar as I am with this control limitation of MSAccess; the limit is for the lifetime of the form, not "at one time". So if you're creating a dynamic form in Access that creates controls as needed, it better reuse them instead of deleting them, because otherwise it it WILL reach that limit after being opened/reloaded enough times. (The solution, if removing is necessary, is to keep a "fresh" reference copy of the form that can be cloned to replace the old one to effectively reset the control count.)

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

This one hits depressingly close to home. My first task at my first position after grad school was to re-implement a monolithic Access DB as a .Net Winforms app. This thing was ridiculous - well over 1GB, linked to a SQL Server instance that contained 400+ tables. The worst part was that it only started dying (you know - worse than Access normally does) because the "developers" who'd been working on it for the last four years hadn't ever deleted a single object they created. Old linked tables? Still there. Old forms? Still there. Old Macros? Queries? Reports? Still there. We had literally ten unused objects to every one in use. Switching forms took about thirty seconds - so did switching from design mode to regular view. I started doing twenty pushups every time I switched contexts between forms, and got in great shape by the time that project was over.

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

dohpaz42:
Anonymous:
toshir0:
A new job is like a child. At first, it appears completely harmless and full of wonder. It's only after you've invested grinding years of your life into it, surrendering sleep and any sense of fun, that you discover that it's a complete disappointment and will never amount to anything, never respect you, and it certainly isn't going to take care of you during your twilight years.
I couldn't go past this utter stupidity...
You being a sociopathic moron doesn't imply that everyone is, boy.
Here, let me help you understand this better: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/sociopathic. You're welcome.

FTFY

It's funny because toshri0 is being sociopathic by not seeing the humor!!! HOW IRONIC

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

I knocked this out in a few hours back in my CPA and it sorta just kept growing.

How many problems have started innocently like this?

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Abso:
Anonymous:
Abso:
Remy Porter:
I'm not sure what you actually mean...
Oh, sure, go around providing counter-examples on me.
In light of that, I suppose what I mean is that I'm a whiner who can't pay attention and who should just write a greasemonkey script to hide that button already.
A greasemonkey script? How about just remembering to use the quote button instead the reply button? Gloves, man, gloves.
Because that would require an ability to pay attention, while this only took two minutes. The two minutes were easier to acquire. (It's not my fault. TV ruined my attention span.)

This concludes my whiny complaints; I now return you to your previously scheduled trolling.

Oh jeez. A girl has insinuated herself into the clubhouse. Can't you read? "No girlz" it says, right there on the door! There's serious manly dick-swinging going on in here!

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

trtrwtf:
Oh jeez. A girl has insinuated herself into the clubhouse. Can't you read? "No girlz" it says, right there on the door! There's serious manly dick-swinging going on in here!

Relax. This is the internet, so I couldn't possibly be an actual girl.

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Abso:
trtrwtf:
Oh jeez. A girl has insinuated herself into the clubhouse. Can't you read? "No girlz" it says, right there on the door! There's serious manly dick-swinging going on in here!
Relax. This is the internet, so I couldn't possibly be an actual girl.

Whew! I was worried for a minute.

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Remy Martin:
"Talk to Vince to plan your travel," his boss said late on the first day. "You'll need to get out to..."

I'm pretty sure I would have strangled him before he finished his sentence.

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

boog:
Remy Martin:
"Talk to Vince to plan your travel," his boss said late on the first day. "You'll need to get out to..."
I'm pretty sure I would have strangled him before he finished his sentence.

frits, you know what to do. Nagesh, good work so far, buddy. Take a rest.

Nagesh · 2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Dathan:
This one hits depressingly close to home. My first task at my first position after grad school was to re-implement a monolithic Access DB as a .Net Winforms app. This thing was ridiculous - well over 1GB, linked to a SQL Server instance that contained 400+ tables. The worst part was that it only started dying (you know - worse than Access normally does) because the "developers" who'd been working on it for the last four years hadn't ever deleted a single object they created. Old linked tables? Still there. Old forms? Still there. Old Macros? Queries? Reports? Still there. We had literally ten unused objects to every one in use. Switching forms took about thirty seconds - so did switching from design mode to regular view. I started doing twenty pushups every time I switched contexts between forms, and got in great shape by the time that project was over.

I hope you quit the job. :) Smart person always know when to quit.

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Nagesh:
Dathan:
This one hits depressingly close to home. My first task at my first position after grad school was to re-implement a monolithic Access DB as a .Net Winforms app. This thing was ridiculous - well over 1GB, linked to a SQL Server instance that contained 400+ tables. The worst part was that it only started dying (you know - worse than Access normally does) because the "developers" who'd been working on it for the last four years hadn't ever deleted a single object they created. Old linked tables? Still there. Old forms? Still there. Old Macros? Queries? Reports? Still there. We had literally ten unused objects to every one in use. Switching forms took about thirty seconds - so did switching from design mode to regular view. I started doing twenty pushups every time I switched contexts between forms, and got in great shape by the time that project was over.

I hope you quit the job. :) Smart person always know when to quit.

Even if they're CMM 5 complaint?

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Limitations like 754 controls seem to be common. Look at the "original" limit of 640k bytes in a PC. Someone probably said "640k? That ought to be enough".

The list goes on.

Some limitations are "classic", like 80 characters in a line. Some feel it comes from 80 column cards (yes, I have used them!), but it is more than likely from the number of characters you can do in pica type on a standard sheet of paper and have some margins. For those who don't remember, pica spacing is 10/inch, and "standard sheets" (US Letter size) are 8.5 inches wide.

If you took out the sequence field, you got 72 columns, which is the width of printing area on an ASR33 teletype (used them too!).

Then again there are silly limitations: speed limits on interstate freeways!

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

DeaDPooL:
I don't see the wtf in this one... unless competent programmers and real budgets are a wtf?

Well, they are.

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

boog:
Remy Martin:
"Talk to Vince to plan your travel," his boss said late on the first day. "You'll need to get out to..."
I'm pretty sure I would have strangled him before he finished his sentence.

I'm pretty sure quitting your job is always a better option than committing physical assault.

Your not too smart, are you?

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

frits:
boog:
Remy Martin:
"Talk to Vince to plan your travel," his boss said late on the first day. "You'll need to get out to..."
I'm pretty sure I would have strangled him before he finished his sentence.
I'm pretty sure quitting your job is always a better option than committing physical assault.
Your not too smart, are you?

What is this, some kind of inverse Turing Test? I'm pretty sure your not a bot. ...

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

An Old Hacker:
Dan:
It's funny because 829 is a prime number.

Which means he did NOT get it by doing straight multiplies, correct?

Ever hear of conditional code?

Ah, you mean a bunch of nested If..Then..Else statements? ;-) (heh, it would be funny if it weren't so true)

boog · 2011-04-05 Reply Admin

boog (defective copy):
I'm pretty sure I would have strangled him before he finished his sentence.

Who cares?

Matt Westwood · 2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Mike:
An Old Hacker:
Dan:
It's funny because 829 is a prime number.

Which means he did NOT get it by doing straight multiplies, correct?

Ever hear of conditional code?

Ah, you mean a bunch of nested If..Then..Else statements? ;-) (heh, it would be funny if it weren't so true)

"... Cut, paste, edit. 752. Cut, paste, edit. 753. Cut, paste, edit. 754. Bugger this, my fingers are tired. Ah sod it, commit ... hmm, wonder if it compiles? Let's just ... hang on, Fred's passing round some donuts."

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Nagesh:
Dathan:
This one hits depressingly close to home. My first task at my first position after grad school was to re-implement a monolithic Access DB as a .Net Winforms app. This thing was ridiculous - well over 1GB, linked to a SQL Server instance that contained 400+ tables. The worst part was that it only started dying (you know - worse than Access normally does) because the "developers" who'd been working on it for the last four years hadn't ever deleted a single object they created. Old linked tables? Still there. Old forms? Still there. Old Macros? Queries? Reports? Still there. We had literally ten unused objects to every one in use. Switching forms took about thirty seconds - so did switching from design mode to regular view. I started doing twenty pushups every time I switched contexts between forms, and got in great shape by the time that project was over.

I hope you quit the job. :) Smart person always know when to quit.

Strong, smart person know that you do not quit until victory is achieved. Weak person quits before victory and stupid person unable to achieve victory.

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Herby:
Then again there are silly limitations: speed limits on interstate freeways!

Yes, but you only think they're silly because you couldn't get up to 65 MPH going downhill with a tailwind, Mr. Love Bug.

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Matt Westwood:
"... Cut, paste, edit. 752. Cut, paste, edit. 753. Cut, paste, edit. 754. Bugger this, my fingers are tired. Ah sod it, commit ... hmm, wonder if it compiles? Let's just ... hang on, Fred's passing round some donuts."

LOL! That's pretty much the modus operandi here.

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Boris Vladamir:
Nagesh:
Dathan:
This one hits depressingly close to home. My first task at my first position after grad school was to re-implement a monolithic Access DB as a .Net Winforms app. This thing was ridiculous - well over 1GB, linked to a SQL Server instance that contained 400+ tables. The worst part was that it only started dying (you know - worse than Access normally does) because the "developers" who'd been working on it for the last four years hadn't ever deleted a single object they created. Old linked tables? Still there. Old forms? Still there. Old Macros? Queries? Reports? Still there. We had literally ten unused objects to every one in use. Switching forms took about thirty seconds - so did switching from design mode to regular view. I started doing twenty pushups every time I switched contexts between forms, and got in great shape by the time that project was over.

I hope you quit the job. :) Smart person always know when to quit.
Strong, smart person know that you do not quit until victory is achieved. Weak person quits before victory and stupid person unable to achieve victory.

More like morons who keep hitting their heads with a book hoping one day the knowledge will fall right out.

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Now you're thinking with Portals.

Kuba · 2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Macro King:
my guess:
Some idiot had been reading about the IEEE 754 standard floating-point format and 754 coincidentally happened to match their house number.

With the words 'surely that'll be enough controls for anyone!' they typed in the immortal line of code.

MAX_CONTROLS = 754

Later that day they got hit by a bus and since then everyone has been too scared to change it.

Does this make me a cynic?

No, that makes you an insider. Have any, um, unreleased and unpublished source to share ? ;)

Kuba · 2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Fred:
Yeah, I think I know that Fortran guy, because I work on the team he just left. First, we haven't replaced his position, because he didn't do anything whatsoever in the last 3 years he was here. Second, his idea of version control was to tar up his entire 150 megabyte directory structure once every couple months or so. Yeah, his code is still running, but we are so replacing it with an industry standard module as soon as we can cut the tentacles it wove into practically everything in sight.

You mean you work on ANSYS? /me ducks and runs

2011-04-05 Reply Admin

Code Slave:
Sadly, I already know the drill with an App like this.
Step 1) Split the database into code and data MDBs (it's sad that this is so common that MS had to build a function into Access to do this). Step 2) Migrate the data MDB to MS SQL Server.

Now the data's safe, you stop hitting the 2GB limit, and you stop any idiot from willie-nillie adding/dropping columns/tables/views. They at least have to have admin access on the Server first.

Then and only then can you start migrating the App portion (if you EVER do) to better tech or fixing the VBA (again if you EVER do).

Sadly, this app re-writes its forms (adding controls) so the app portion alone will hit the 2gb limit (unless it is compacted occasionally). To get around the limited number of controls you may add to a form over its entire life-time is simpler. Throw the form away each time! Use a templated version of the form and get a new copy each time you need to change the displayed controls. This approach works, but please do not ask why I know :)

<12 years of MS-Access VBA development leaves traces in the soul>

toshir0 · 2011-04-06 Reply Admin

ted:
dohpaz42:
Anonymous:
toshir0:
A new job is like a child. At first, it appears completely harmless and full of wonder. It's only after you've invested grinding years of your life into it, surrendering sleep and any sense of fun, that you discover that it's a complete disappointment and will never amount to anything, never respect you, and it certainly isn't going to take care of you during your twilight years.
I couldn't go past this utter stupidity...
You being a sociopathic moron doesn't imply that everyone is, boy.
Here, let me help you understand this better: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/sociopathic. You're welcome.

FTFY

It's funny because toshri0 is being sociopathic by not seeing the humor!!! HOW IRONIC

by not seeing the humor ?

Do you mean "by not appreciating this sick humor" ? How could this make me sociopathic ?

This rant on children was pointless and full of disguised hate. People like that often call for "humor" when people mock or despise their disgusting values.

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

toshir0:
ted:
dohpaz42:
Anonymous:
toshir0:
A new job is like a child. At first, it appears completely harmless and full of wonder. It's only after you've invested grinding years of your life into it, surrendering sleep and any sense of fun, that you discover that it's a complete disappointment and will never amount to anything, never respect you, and it certainly isn't going to take care of you during your twilight years.
I couldn't go past this utter stupidity...
You being a sociopathic moron doesn't imply that everyone is, boy.
Here, let me help you understand this better: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/sociopathic. You're welcome.

FTFY

It's funny because toshri0 is being sociopathic by not seeing the humor!!! HOW IRONIC
by not seeing the humor ?

Do you mean "by not appreciating this sick humor" ? How could this make me sociopathic ?

This rant on children was pointless and full of disguised hate. People like that often call for "humor" when people mock or despise their disgusting values.

Having children at all in this overpopulated world is the really disgusting attitude.

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

Anonymous:
[snip] A greasemonkey script? How about just remembering to use the quote button instead the reply button? Gloves, man, gloves.

That preview button is quite handy too....

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

toshir0:
ted:
dohpaz42:
Anonymous:
toshir0:
A new job is like a child. At first, it appears completely harmless and full of wonder. It's only after you've invested grinding years of your life into it, surrendering sleep and any sense of fun, that you discover that it's a complete disappointment and will never amount to anything, never respect you, and it certainly isn't going to take care of you during your twilight years.
I couldn't go past this utter stupidity...
You being a sociopathic moron doesn't imply that everyone is, boy.
Here, let me help you understand this better: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/sociopathic. You're welcome.

FTFY

It's funny because toshri0 is being sociopathic by not seeing the humor!!! HOW IRONIC
by not seeing the humor ?

Do you mean "by not appreciating this sick humor" ? How could this make me sociopathic ?

This rant on children was pointless and full of disguised hate. People like that often call for "humor" when people mock or despise their disgusting values.

What sort of moron can't just laugh at the joke or shut the hell up? If you've got such a boner for kids then... oh my God, you sick fuck! And you have the audacity to attack Remy, at least he's only violating children with his words you monster!!

WthyrBendragon · 2011-04-06 Reply Admin

frits:
Chuck:
Anonymous:
Even 754 rainbow-bright unicorns couldn't make this job any better.
I only got to about 250 rainbow-bright unicorns before Firefox crashed, but you're probably right.

I got to 755 and then everything went all fire-and-brimstone and the intro to Slayer's "Hell Awaits" played on a continuous loop.

If you manage to get to 768 the first 10 seconds of the Hampster Dance segue into an unavoidable and inescapable rick-roll.

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

I feel that watching Falling down will help you, you are not alone, I'm sure Michael Douglas feels your pain :)

Also I think there is much terribleness in the world, one of them is corrupt religious fanatics and another is fucked up legacy Access systems to run a business like this. The earlier I think is marginally easier to manage, I call it "burying my head in the sand and locking my doors". Doesn't work with the latter if you're the only dev guy :(

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

renewest:
47 separate limitations in MS Access, says Microsoft's official documentation.

They wanted to have more but 47 was, well.., the limit.

The trouble is, 57 was already taken!

So was 42!

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

frits:
boog:
Remy Martin:
"Talk to Vince to plan your travel," his boss said late on the first day. "You'll need to get out to..."
I'm pretty sure I would have strangled him before he finished his sentence.
I'm pretty sure quitting your job is always a better option than committing physical assault.
Your not too smart, are you?

Although, to be fair, he may have attented school on Qo'noS, where commiting physical assault is often taught to be the way to get a better job...

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

QJ:
toshir0:
ted:
dohpaz42:
Anonymous:
toshir0:
A new job is like a child. At first, it appears completely harmless and full of wonder. It's only after you've invested grinding years of your life into it, surrendering sleep and any sense of fun, that you discover that it's a complete disappointment and will never amount to anything, never respect you, and it certainly isn't going to take care of you during your twilight years.
I couldn't go past this utter stupidity...
You being a sociopathic moron doesn't imply that everyone is, boy.
Here, let me help you understand this better: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/sociopathic. You're welcome.

FTFY

It's funny because toshri0 is being sociopathic by not seeing the humor!!! HOW IRONIC
by not seeing the humor ?

Do you mean "by not appreciating this sick humor" ? How could this make me sociopathic ?

This rant on children was pointless and full of disguised hate. People like that often call for "humor" when people mock or despise their disgusting values.

Having children at all in this overpopulated world is the really disgusting attitude.

This is nice joke! You must live in tiny, puny country if you think world is overpopulated. Have you not read that we had to arm cosmonauts with shotguns in space capsule to fight back wolves because of desolate and remote area?

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

Anonymous:
Nagesh:
Anonymous:
dohpaz42:
In the breakroom of my company, there is a quote on the "quote board" that says, "Broken gets fixed; shoddy lasts forever".
You have a breakroom? What luxury! We don't even have a water cooler, much less a breakroom or kitchen. Aye, and we used to have to get up out of the shoebox at twelve o'clock at night and lick the road clean with our tongues.
But you try and tell the young people today that...

Best work for CMM level 5 company then.
I'm not getting into a pissing match with you but my company is CMMI Level 5 and AS9000 certified. It doesn't change the fact they're tight-fisted bastards.

Are you seriously still working to CMM? That was superseded about 10 years ago.

[image]

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

Anonymous:
Abso:
Anonymous:
Lone Marauder:
Anonymous:
Having a pretty poster on your wall does not make you CMMI compliant. You do realise that CMM and CMMI are separate models that require separate appraisals, don't you? Compliance with CMM does not automatically make you compliant with CMMI. You need to go through the whole appraisal process again and the process areas have been considerably expanded so it's far harder than gaining CMM compliance. It sounds like your company are working to a completely obsolete standard.

YHBT. YHL. HAND.
WTF?

Please, allow me to translate: "Nagesh's post was not an accurate representation of his place of employment; rather, he was attempting to draw other readers into arguments for his own amusement. It is evident by your reply that he has succeeded. I hope that you recover speedily from his deceit and from any disappointment this revelation of his motives may bring you."
Oh right, thanks for the translation to adult. I guess "Lone Marauder" confused me with one of his 14 year old friends he likes to "sext" or whatever it is the tweens are doing these days. If he was little older and spent a bit more time here he'd know that Nagesh is 100% serious, he's brought up his company's precious CMM certification countless times before.

Interesting, err, let's just call it 'logic'...

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

"A new job is like a child. At first, it appears completely harmless and full of wonder. It's only after you've invested grinding years of your life into it, surrendering sleep and any sense of fun, that you discover that it's a complete disappointment and will never amount to anything, never respect you, and it certainly isn't going to take care of you during your twilight years."

Shouldn't that be "..like a marriage..."

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

Ernold:
Anonymous:
Abso:
Anonymous:
Lone Marauder:
Anonymous:
Having a pretty poster on your wall does not make you CMMI compliant. You do realise that CMM and CMMI are separate models that require separate appraisals, don't you? Compliance with CMM does not automatically make you compliant with CMMI. You need to go through the whole appraisal process again and the process areas have been considerably expanded so it's far harder than gaining CMM compliance. It sounds like your company are working to a completely obsolete standard.

YHBT. YHL. HAND.
WTF?

Please, allow me to translate: "Nagesh's post was not an accurate representation of his place of employment; rather, he was attempting to draw other readers into arguments for his own amusement. It is evident by your reply that he has succeeded. I hope that you recover speedily from his deceit and from any disappointment this revelation of his motives may bring you."
Oh right, thanks for the translation to adult. I guess "Lone Marauder" confused me with one of his 14 year old friends he likes to "sext" or whatever it is the tweens are doing these days. If he was little older and spent a bit more time here he'd know that Nagesh is 100% serious, he's brought up his company's precious CMM certification countless times before.

Interesting, err, let's just call it 'logic'...

I've seen Nagesh bleat on about CMM 5 too, just read some old comments, you'll see it. Sure he's a filthy troll but I reckon his deluded trumpet-blowing is more serious than you think.

Nagesh · 2011-04-06 Reply Admin

Jerry:
Ernold:
Anonymous:
Abso:
Anonymous:
Lone Marauder:
Anonymous:
Having a pretty poster on your wall does not make you CMMI compliant. You do realise that CMM and CMMI are separate models that require separate appraisals, don't you? Compliance with CMM does not automatically make you compliant with CMMI. You need to go through the whole appraisal process again and the process areas have been considerably expanded so it's far harder than gaining CMM compliance. It sounds like your company are working to a completely obsolete standard.

YHBT. YHL. HAND.
WTF?

Please, allow me to translate: "Nagesh's post was not an accurate representation of his place of employment; rather, he was attempting to draw other readers into arguments for his own amusement. It is evident by your reply that he has succeeded. I hope that you recover speedily from his deceit and from any disappointment this revelation of his motives may bring you."
Oh right, thanks for the translation to adult. I guess "Lone Marauder" confused me with one of his 14 year old friends he likes to "sext" or whatever it is the tweens are doing these days. If he was little older and spent a bit more time here he'd know that Nagesh is 100% serious, he's brought up his company's precious CMM certification countless times before.

Interesting, err, let's just call it 'logic'...
I've seen Nagesh bleat on about CMM 5 too, just read some old comments, you'll see it. Sure he's a filthy troll but I reckon his deluded trumpet-blowing is more serious than you think.

jerry go back to annoying tom in that cartoon.

kthxbai

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

Nagesh:
Jerry:
Ernold:
Anonymous:
Abso:
Anonymous:
Lone Marauder:
Anonymous:
Having a pretty poster on your wall does not make you CMMI compliant. You do realise that CMM and CMMI are separate models that require separate appraisals, don't you? Compliance with CMM does not automatically make you compliant with CMMI. You need to go through the whole appraisal process again and the process areas have been considerably expanded so it's far harder than gaining CMM compliance. It sounds like your company are working to a completely obsolete standard.

YHBT. YHL. HAND.
WTF?

Please, allow me to translate: "Nagesh's post was not an accurate representation of his place of employment; rather, he was attempting to draw other readers into arguments for his own amusement. It is evident by your reply that he has succeeded. I hope that you recover speedily from his deceit and from any disappointment this revelation of his motives may bring you."
Oh right, thanks for the translation to adult. I guess "Lone Marauder" confused me with one of his 14 year old friends he likes to "sext" or whatever it is the tweens are doing these days. If he was little older and spent a bit more time here he'd know that Nagesh is 100% serious, he's brought up his company's precious CMM certification countless times before.

Interesting, err, let's just call it 'logic'...
I've seen Nagesh bleat on about CMM 5 too, just read some old comments, you'll see it. Sure he's a filthy troll but I reckon his deluded trumpet-blowing is more serious than you think.

jerry go back to annoying tom in that cartoon.

kthxbai

<trombone>Wah wah wah wahhhhh!</trombone>

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

This made me die a little inside.

Funny as hell, though.

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

If the company has a MS access ANYTHING, pack your bags quietly, say you are going to lunch and never ever come back.

Honestly, flipping burgers is better than the steaming pile that is MS access and the nasty crap that the thing has created by "handy with puters" people.

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

Nagesh:
booger (fake), Are you even remotely serious? We have got running water in monsoon so much that our paddy fields are drowning. Stop making fun of my country, madarchod!!!

At least TopCod3r was entertaining.

2011-04-06 Reply Admin

Jerry:
Ernold:
Anonymous:
Abso:
Anonymous:
Lone Marauder:
Anonymous:
Having a pretty poster on your wall does not make you CMMI compliant. You do realise that CMM and CMMI are separate models that require separate appraisals, don't you? Compliance with CMM does not automatically make you compliant with CMMI. You need to go through the whole appraisal process again and the process areas have been considerably expanded so it's far harder than gaining CMM compliance. It sounds like your company are working to a completely obsolete standard.

YHBT. YHL. HAND.
WTF?

Please, allow me to translate: "Nagesh's post was not an accurate representation of his place of employment; rather, he was attempting to draw other readers into arguments for his own amusement. It is evident by your reply that he has succeeded. I hope that you recover speedily from his deceit and from any disappointment this revelation of his motives may bring you."
Oh right, thanks for the translation to adult. I guess "Lone Marauder" confused me with one of his 14 year old friends he likes to "sext" or whatever it is the tweens are doing these days. If he was little older and spent a bit more time here he'd know that Nagesh is 100% serious, he's brought up his company's precious CMM certification countless times before.

Interesting, err, let's just call it 'logic'...
I've seen Nagesh bleat on about CMM 5 too, just read some old comments, you'll see it. Sure he's a filthy troll but I reckon his deluded trumpet-blowing is more serious than you think.

Nah I'm good, thanks. You can remain the sole trollee...

2011-04-07 Reply Admin

Ernold:
Jerry:
Ernold:
Anonymous:
Abso:
Anonymous:
Lone Marauder:
Anonymous:
Having a pretty poster on your wall does not make you CMMI compliant. You do realise that CMM and CMMI are separate models that require separate appraisals, don't you? Compliance with CMM does not automatically make you compliant with CMMI. You need to go through the whole appraisal process again and the process areas have been considerably expanded so it's far harder than gaining CMM compliance. It sounds like your company are working to a completely obsolete standard.

YHBT. YHL. HAND.
WTF?

Please, allow me to translate: "Nagesh's post was not an accurate representation of his place of employment; rather, he was attempting to draw other readers into arguments for his own amusement. It is evident by your reply that he has succeeded. I hope that you recover speedily from his deceit and from any disappointment this revelation of his motives may bring you."
Oh right, thanks for the translation to adult. I guess "Lone Marauder" confused me with one of his 14 year old friends he likes to "sext" or whatever it is the tweens are doing these days. If he was little older and spent a bit more time here he'd know that Nagesh is 100% serious, he's brought up his company's precious CMM certification countless times before.

Interesting, err, let's just call it 'logic'...
I've seen Nagesh bleat on about CMM 5 too, just read some old comments, you'll see it. Sure he's a filthy troll but I reckon his deluded trumpet-blowing is more serious than you think.

Nah I'm good, thanks. You can remain the sole trollee...

You're as deluded as the trolls, but less experienced...

Accessing the Portal

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