• Paul (unregistered) in reply to Pim
    Pim:
    I'm not sure I get what the WTF is. Quitting your job because the boss's wife claims you're loyal?

    Irony. You're doing it wrong.

  • Cant Sleep RPG Will Eat Me (unregistered) in reply to boog
    boog:
    ...Paul had the uber-nerd's determination to not take any crap and a significant mass advantage.
    People often underestimate that crazy retard strength nerds can get when they're all worked up.

    Damn you. I just had a flashback to the Game Which Shall Not Be Named.

    Damn you!

  • Paul (unregistered) in reply to Rootbeer
    Rootbeer:
    In before gun nuts asserting "castle doctrine" would give them the right to shoot Steve dead through the front door with one of the many shotguns laying around their houses.

    Shotguns? Pfft. Such an amateur tool. My would-be assassin isn't getting past the murder hole, even if the archers, moat with sharks and raised iron drawbridge don't stop them (the fricken' laser beams are on back-order from Amazon).

  • Anonymous (unregistered) in reply to Hater
    Hater:
    Woe cares you think? I go attemp back autofelate now...
    AKA the reverse scorpion?

    BTW-You're doing it wrong.

  • Paul (unregistered) in reply to Patrick
    Patrick:
    Nederlander:
    Kudzu Kid:
    Every cop I know (and I know more than one...) has a "throw down" weapon. Ditto every home owner worth a sh*t. You know... that knife in the kitchen drawer that looks bad ass but you don't use much? Yeah, that one... That would end up in the hand of / or near / the intruder when the cops arrive.

    Wow... Odd stuff. I'm Dutch, but it's not quite common to have weapons lying around your house at all. Sure. there probably is a knife somewhere in the kitchen (most likely inside the dishwasher or some drawers between the forks and the spoons.)

    Aha, but leaving sports equipment by the door is perfectly fine. And last I checked, both Archery and Baseball are valid sports.

    Where I grew up, baseball bats were very popular sporting items. Nobody plays baseball there, though.

  • (cs) in reply to Paul
    Paul:
    Patrick:
    Nederlander:
    Kudzu Kid:
    Every cop I know (and I know more than one...) has a "throw down" weapon. Ditto every home owner worth a sh*t. You know... that knife in the kitchen drawer that looks bad ass but you don't use much? Yeah, that one... That would end up in the hand of / or near / the intruder when the cops arrive.

    Wow... Odd stuff. I'm Dutch, but it's not quite common to have weapons lying around your house at all. Sure. there probably is a knife somewhere in the kitchen (most likely inside the dishwasher or some drawers between the forks and the spoons.)

    Aha, but leaving sports equipment by the door is perfectly fine. And last I checked, both Archery and Baseball are valid sports.

    Where I grew up, baseball bats were very popular sporting items. Nobody plays baseball there, though.

    They're especially convenient because they fit in the trunk of your car perfectly!

  • (cs)

    There have been times when I thought to myself that management was insane, and then charitably conceded that I'm glad I don't have to do what they have to do (because their jobs often require them to appear insane).

    This is insanity.

  • (cs) in reply to Protogenxl
    Protogenxl:
    There is a local specialty retail store where the owner will fly off the rails at both employees and customers at the slightest hint of a problem. From a bar-code not scanning to having to get product from the stock room.
    Wow. That is specialized. I wonder how they make any money on that.
  • Zune-Tran (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    Paul:
    Patrick:
    Nederlander:
    Wow... Odd stuff. I'm Dutch, but even for me, it's odd to have dildos lying around your house at all. Sure. there probably is a dildo somewhere in the kitchen (most likely I'll get one from the dishwasher or between the forking and the spooning.)

    Aha, but leaving sex toys by the door is perfectly fine. And last I checked, both Archery and Baseball are valid sports.

    Where I grew up, baseball bats were very popular sporting items. Nobody plays baseball there, though.

    They're especially convenient because they fit in the hole of your ass perfectly!
    ZTFY

  • Macho (unregistered) in reply to frits
    frits:
    Hater:
    frits:
    ObiWayneKenobi:
    Protogenxl:
    There is a local specialty retail store where the owner will fly off the rails at both employees and customers at the slightest hint of a problem. From a bar-code not scanning to having to get product from the stock room.

    How, pray tell, does this store remain in business?

    I'm guessing by rule of the Law of Supply and Demand. Think "Soup Nazi".
    Woe cares you think? I go attemp back autofelate now...
    Lay off the pills, bro.

    Man, you having fun chatting with your sock-puppet?

  • (cs) in reply to Macho
    Macho:
    frits:
    Hater:
    frits:
    ObiWayneKenobi:
    Protogenxl:
    There is a local specialty retail store where the owner will fly off the rails at both employees and customers at the slightest hint of a problem. From a bar-code not scanning to having to get product from the stock room.

    How, pray tell, does this store remain in business?

    I'm guessing by rule of the Law of Supply and Demand. Think "Soup Nazi".
    Woe cares you think? I go attemp back autofelate now...
    Lay off the pills, bro.

    Man, you having fun chatting with your sock-puppet?

    No, I don't think it's a sock-puppet. It seems we have a new "Mr. T Experience" walking among us. Someone with poor communication skills telling everybody on the forum they're stupid and that they'll ban them.

  • (cs) in reply to Patrick
    Patrick:
    Aha, but leaving sports equipment by the door is perfectly fine. And last I checked, both Archery and Baseball are valid sports.

    Well, yes and no: There is a difference.

    A baseball bat isn't considered a weapon unless you actually assault (or batter) someone with it. Bow and arrow is always a weapon and is regulated as such (even if not usually as tightly as firearms).

  • (cs) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    Macho:
    frits:
    Hater:
    frits:
    ObiWayneKenobi:
    Protogenxl:
    There is a local specialty retail store where the owner will fly off the rails at both employees and customers at the slightest hint of a problem. From a bar-code not scanning to having to get product from the stock room.

    How, pray tell, does this store remain in business?

    I'm guessing by rule of the Law of Supply and Demand. Think "Soup Nazi".
    Woe cares you think? I go attemp back autofelate now...
    Lay off the pills, bro.

    Man, you having fun chatting with your sock-puppet?

    No, I don't think it's a sock-puppet. It seems we have a new "Mr. T Experience" walking among us. Someone with poor communication skills telling everybody on the forum they're stupid and that they'll ban them.
    I don't think it's the Mr. T Experience either. That guy was just straight trolling.

    My best guess is it's either Zunesis, Nagesh, or someone from the great TDWTF hivemind. Either way, I couldn't care less what they think, and only respond for my own amusement.

  • Nagesh (unregistered) in reply to frits
    frits:
    C-Octothorpe:
    Macho:
    frits:
    Hater:
    frits:
    ObiWayneKenobi:
    Protogenxl:
    There is a local specialty retail store where the owner will fly off the rails at both employees and customers at the slightest hint of a problem. From a bar-code not scanning to having to get product from the stock room.

    How, pray tell, does this store remain in business?

    I'm guessing by rule of the Law of Supply and Demand. Think "Soup Nazi".
    Woe cares you think? I go attemp back autofelate now...
    Lay off the pills, bro.

    Man, you having fun chatting with your sock-puppet?

    No, I don't think it's a sock-puppet. It seems we have a new "Mr. T Experience" walking among us. Someone with poor communication skills telling everybody on the forum they're stupid and that they'll ban them.
    I don't think it's the Mr. T Experience either. That guy was just straight trolling.

    My best guess is it's either Zunesis, Nagesh, or someone from the great TDWTF hivemind. Either way, I couldn't care less what they think, and only respond for my own amusement.

    Nobudy care what u think neither.

  • NH (unregistered) in reply to Patrick
    Patrick:
    Nederlander:
    Kudzu Kid:
    Every cop I know (and I know more than one...) has a "throw down" weapon. Ditto every home owner worth a sh*t. You know... that knife in the kitchen drawer that looks bad ass but you don't use much? Yeah, that one... That would end up in the hand of / or near / the intruder when the cops arrive.

    Wow... Odd stuff. I'm Dutch, but it's not quite common to have weapons lying around your house at all. Sure. there probably is a knife somewhere in the kitchen (most likely inside the dishwasher or some drawers between the forks and the spoons.)

    Aha, but leaving sports equipment by the door is perfectly fine. And last I checked, both Archery and Baseball are valid sports.

    So is fencing.

  • (cs) in reply to Nagesh
    Nagesh:
    Nobudy care what u think neither.
    Congratulations, you've discovered one of the universal rules of the internet. Please pat yourself on the back.
  • Nagesh No More (unregistered) in reply to frits
    frits:
    Nagesh:
    Nobudy care what u think neither.
    Congratulations, you've discovered one of the universal rules of the internet. Please pat yourself on the back.

    Version 1.1. TheDailyWTF has been improved significantly.

    // ==UserScript== // @name Nogesh // @namespace http://thedailywtf.com/nogesh // @description No more gesh v1.1 // @include http://thedailywtf.com/Comments/* // ==/UserScript==

    var comments = document.getElementsByClassName("CommentContainer"); for(var i=0;i<comments.length;i++) { var comment = comments[i]; var html = comment.innerHTML.toLowerCase(); if (html.indexOf("nagesh") != -1) { comment.innerHTML="Nogesh"; } if (html.indexOf("hater") != -1) { comment.innerHTML="Some lame comment by Hater"; } }

  • LANMind (unregistered)

    Wow. This story was as much of a wtf as it could have been, but the comments have provided sufficient - if bizarre - entertainment.

    +1 everybody!

  • forgottenlord (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    An Old Hacker:
    boog:
    Lone Marauder:
    Seriously, the police are there to catch the criminal after a crime has happened, not to prevent it in the first place. Ask anyone that has had to deal with a stalker.
    That's why whenever the police arrive during the crime, they always leave and wait for the perpetrator to finish robbing/raping/murdering/etc. before they come back to arrest him. Surely they don't have any authority to help or rescue anyone.

    You mean like they did in Columbine?

    And Vancouver, BC (Canada)... The police there JUST released a statement that they're RECOMMENDING charging 60 individuals. God forgid they ever catch anybody before or during the committing of a crime...

    I'm totally calling BS on that.

    There is a world of difference between charging someone and the initial arrest. Because of rules such as habeas corpus and double jeopardy which are imperative to the protection of a just and free society, there are two distinct steps to the process: the prevention or stopping of an action and the filing of charges. You don't want to file the charges until you've got your evidence collected - because if you mess up and you don't have all the evidence that you could have had and don't get as significant a sentence as would be appropriate, you won't get a second chance. You can't hold an individual without charges for longer than a couple of days (exact length differs depending on jurisdiction, but normally 48 hrs).

    In riots, arresting people is secondary - an officer who arrests someone is unable to deal with the riot until that individual is put in a car which could easily be 5 minutes - and may need to take them all the way to the station before he can return to deal with the riot. When the officers could easily be outnumbered by rioters in extreme excess of 10:1, and considering how vulnerable an individual officer would be while arresting someone (or, alternatively, the number of other officers that would need to cover him), how difficult it would be to isolate individual rioters from the middle of a crowd of rioters, the length of time other rioters get to continue rioting while the officer completes processing of the one individual, it is amongst the worst ways to deal with riots. The priority of riot police is to first minimize casualties and second minimize property damage. To arrest people individually like that guarantees a failure on the second requirement. So what are their tactics: disperse the crowd. Dispersement means that you have almost no chance of actually arresting someone, but you have a far greater chance of getting them to leave the area and stop being a mob. It focuses energy away from destruction and towards movement meeting the second requirement and if you can do it in a way to minimize injuries, then you've met the first objective. If you do it right, they'll go home. Especially when most of them know they're in the wrong like they would've been when rioting about a Canucks loss and reducing the density of the crowd (by having them disperse) would allow many of them to get their wits about them and go home.

    They did it right.

  • (cs) in reply to PedanticCurmudgeon
    PedanticCurmudgeon:
    geoffrey:
    Chuck does seem to have a problem with loyalty. If he came to me for a job, I'd have a tough time overlooking the way he left Steve in the lurch, after all that Steve had done for him.
    What's the over/under for the number of bites this troll will get? I'm guessing at least 3.
    Too obvious. Quite frankly, I read past that posting without even noticing it. And I'm the best for swallowing troll-bait.
  • (cs) in reply to anon
    anon:
    English Man:
    dohpaz42:
    Ave:
    Why is everybody implying there was a knife in the story?

    If one should receive a visit from his boss, one should automatically assume he would be carrying a knife?

    Is it something too American and I don't get it?

    In most U.S. states, it's only legal to kill an intruder if they were attacking you. So if somebody breaks in to your house, and you kill them, you "put a knife in their hand" so that you can claim self defense. It's an old running (almost inside) joke for us Americans.

    Now can you explain why it's funny?
    Because here in America murder is funny. Haven't you ever heard the idiom "(comedian's name) killed"?

    But not even cannibals will actually eat dead comedians. Apparently they taste funny.

  • (cs)

    I've just thought: did Steve then go and get a job as a security guard on the Jerry Springer show? He needs a show of his own, that man.

  • (cs) in reply to Ave
    Ave:
    Why is everybody implying there was a knife in the story?

    If one should receive a visit from his boss, one should automatically assume he would be carrying a knife?

    Is it something too American and I don't get it?

    Everyone wasn't implying there was a knife. One person was replying to another (as indicated by the comment number links) but forgot to use the quote button.

    jc:
    ObiWayneKenobi:
    Luckily he never showed up at my place of residence screaming or I would have shot him and claimed he came at me with a knife.

    and what would you claim happened to the knife ?

    Make sense now?

  • William (unregistered) in reply to Rootbeer
    Rootbeer:
    In before gun nuts asserting "castle doctrine" would give them the right to shoot Steve dead through the front door with one of the many shotguns laying around their houses.

    Barely made it. You only beat them by four minutes.

  • (cs) in reply to Paul
    Paul:
    Rootbeer:
    In before gun nuts asserting "castle doctrine" would give them the right to shoot Steve dead through the front door with one of the many shotguns laying around their houses.

    Shotguns? Pfft. Such an amateur tool. My would-be assassin isn't getting past the murder hole, even if the archers, moat with sharks and raised iron drawbridge don't stop them (the fricken' laser beams are on back-order from Amazon).

    Hi there Paul, you gonna tell us what that fight was about, then?

  • (cs) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    Paul:
    Patrick:
    Nederlander:
    Kudzu Kid:
    Every cop I know (and I know more than one...) has a "throw down" weapon. Ditto every home owner worth a sh*t. You know... that knife in the kitchen drawer that looks bad ass but you don't use much? Yeah, that one... That would end up in the hand of / or near / the intruder when the cops arrive.

    Wow... Odd stuff. I'm Dutch, but it's not quite common to have weapons lying around your house at all. Sure. there probably is a knife somewhere in the kitchen (most likely inside the dishwasher or some drawers between the forks and the spoons.)

    Aha, but leaving sports equipment by the door is perfectly fine. And last I checked, both Archery and Baseball are valid sports.

    Where I grew up, baseball bats were very popular sporting items. Nobody plays baseball there, though.

    They're especially convenient because they fit in the trunk of your car perfectly!

    They are also very satisfying to use for their original intended purpose. That is, for hitting baseballs. Baseball: that's the correct term for redneck's head, isn't it?

  • Born Texas Proud (unregistered) in reply to Rootbeer
    Rootbeer:
    In before gun nuts asserting "castle doctrine" would give them the right to shoot Steve dead through the front door with one of the many shotguns laying around their houses.
    I think you're missing the fact that shotguns would not penetrate any but the flimsiest of front doors. Go ahead. Try it. But be forewarned that the discharge of a firearm indoors is louder than anything you can possibly imagine.
  • Zune-Tran (unregistered) in reply to frits
    frits:
    I don't think it's the Mr. T Experience either. That guy was just straight trolling.

    My best guess is it's either Zunesis, Nagesh, or someone from the great TDWTF hivemind. Either way, I couldn't care less what they think, and only respond for my own amusement.

    It's cool that you guys think it might be me, but don't flatter yourselves. I don't have that big of a hard-on for you!

  • Paul (unregistered) in reply to Matt Westwood
    Matt Westwood:
    Paul:
    Rootbeer:
    In before gun nuts asserting "castle doctrine" would give them the right to shoot Steve dead through the front door with one of the many shotguns laying around their houses.

    Shotguns? Pfft. Such an amateur tool. My would-be assassin isn't getting past the murder hole, even if the archers, moat with sharks and raised iron drawbridge don't stop them (the fricken' laser beams are on back-order from Amazon).

    Hi there Paul, you gonna tell us what that fight was about, then?

    Steve knew just enough about programming to be dangerous. His insistence on forcing me to use "n" as the variable name for all for..next type loops was stupid. Everyone knows "i" is the correct name for these things!

    Err, OK, I'm not really that Paul (good catch though!) but that sounds entirely plausible to me.

  • Paul (unregistered) in reply to Matt Westwood
    Matt Westwood:
    C-Octothorpe:
    Paul:
    Patrick:
    Nederlander:
    Kudzu Kid:
    Every cop I know (and I know more than one...) has a "throw down" weapon. Ditto every home owner worth a sh*t. You know... that knife in the kitchen drawer that looks bad ass but you don't use much? Yeah, that one... That would end up in the hand of / or near / the intruder when the cops arrive.

    Wow... Odd stuff. I'm Dutch, but it's not quite common to have weapons lying around your house at all. Sure. there probably is a knife somewhere in the kitchen (most likely inside the dishwasher or some drawers between the forks and the spoons.)

    Aha, but leaving sports equipment by the door is perfectly fine. And last I checked, both Archery and Baseball are valid sports.

    Where I grew up, baseball bats were very popular sporting items. Nobody plays baseball there, though.

    They're especially convenient because they fit in the trunk of your car perfectly!

    They are also very satisfying to use for their original intended purpose. That is, for hitting baseballs. Baseball: that's the correct term for redneck's head, isn't it?

    "Baseball" and "kneecap" can be interchangeable, too.

    Captcha: "aliquam", sounds like something you might take for the pain after being the subject of a few innings of "kneecap baseball".

  • Hater (unregistered) in reply to frits
    frits:
    I don't think

    We all already know that. Nothing surprising. You don't need to admit that.

  • (cs) in reply to Hater
    Hater:
    frits:
    I don't think

    We all already know that. Nothing surprising. You don't need to admit that.

    Which, of course, enhances the delight I feel when you respond to my posts anyway. I put in zero effort and you bite. You're like the anti-troll or something.

  • Fedaykin (unregistered) in reply to Patrick

    [quote user="Patrick"] Wow... Odd stuff. I'm Dutch, but it's not quite common to have weapons lying around your house at all. Sure. there probably is a knife somewhere in the kitchen (most likely inside the dishwasher or some drawers between the forks and the spoons.)[/quote]

    Aha, but leaving sports equipment by the door is perfectly fine. And last I checked, both Archery and Baseball are valid sports.[/quote]

    I have a (real, hand forged and sharpened) greatsword hanging on the wall in my living room. does that count?

  • (cs) in reply to Fedaykin
    Fedaykin:
    I have a (real, hand forged and sharpened) greatsword hanging on the wall in my living room. does that count?
    As if sharpening it would make any difference...
  • anonymouser (unregistered) in reply to Born Texas Proud
    Born Texas Proud:
    Rootbeer:
    In before gun nuts asserting "castle doctrine" would give them the right to shoot Steve dead through the front door with one of the many shotguns laying around their houses.
    I think you're missing the fact that shotguns would not penetrate any but the flimsiest of front doors. Go ahead. Try it. But be forewarned that the discharge of a firearm indoors is louder than anything you can possibly imagine.
    Do shotgun shells only come with #9 bird shot where you live?

    Put 00 buckshot or a slug in your shotgun and the average front door isn't a problem

  • (cs) in reply to Fedaykin

    [quote user="Fedaykin"][quote user="Patrick"] Wow... Odd stuff. I'm Dutch, but it's not quite common to have weapons lying around your house at all. Sure. there probably is a knife somewhere in the kitchen (most likely inside the dishwasher or some drawers between the forks and the spoons.)[/quote]

    Aha, but leaving sports equipment by the door is perfectly fine. And last I checked, both Archery and Baseball are valid sports.[/quote]

    I have a (real, hand forged and sharpened) greatsword hanging on the wall in my living room. does that count?[/quote]

    I have razor-sharp wit and listen to very heavy music, that should be weapons enough.

    Actually, they did an experiment round our way not so long ago. Shopkeepers who were fed up of the crowds of no-good children hanging around took to playing classical music from loudspeakers outside, in the hope that it would chase the vermin away. It worked.

  • (cs) in reply to English Man
    English Man:
    dohpaz42:
    Ave:
    Why is everybody implying there was a knife in the story?

    If one should receive a visit from his boss, one should automatically assume he would be carrying a knife?

    Is it something too American and I don't get it?

    In most U.S. states, it's only legal to kill an intruder if they were attacking you. So if somebody breaks in to your house, and you kill them, you "put a knife in their hand" so that you can claim self defense. It's an old running (almost inside) joke for us Americans.

    Now can you explain why it's funny?
    It's funny because the squirrel died.

  • PG4 (unregistered)

    For our non US friends, and maybe some US ones that have no clue.....

    You kill someone in your home, or elsewhere it is murder. Plain and simple. That might not be the exact charge, but you did a bad thing. Now the question becomes what was your defense if any.

    You can claim self defense. In most states you are required to not start the fight and also try to retreat. If you met those conditions then self defense is still something you must prove. You must prove you had no choice.

    Castle laws in most places say you don't have to try to retreat or other things if you are legally in your home or car and the other person is not legally entering. They don't have to have committed a crime yet. When that is the case you can claim self defense and the DA must prove that it was not.

    Walking in a dark alley I shoot someone, I need to prove it was self defense.

    Someone in my yard, and I shoot him. I will be charged with a crime. At the trial if I can show he was shooting at me through a window, thus it was self defense, I should get off.

    Someone comes into my house in the middle of the night, and I shoot him, most likely I will not be charged based on self defense and Castle laws. Now if the DA can prove I lured the person into my house to shoot him, then I'm in big trouble.

    Bottom line Castle laws are not an automatic get out jail free card. They shift the burden of proof if you claim self defense.

    Sorry for the real life useful information. Now back to your normal bitching about the story.

  • Born Texas Proud (unregistered) in reply to anonymouser
    anonymouser:
    Born Texas Proud:
    Rootbeer:
    In before gun nuts asserting "castle doctrine" would give them the right to shoot Steve dead through the front door with one of the many shotguns laying around their houses.
    I think you're missing the fact that shotguns would not penetrate any but the flimsiest of front doors. Go ahead. Try it. But be forewarned that the discharge of a firearm indoors is louder than anything you can possibly imagine.
    Do shotgun shells only come with #9 bird shot where you live?

    Put 00 buckshot or a slug in your shotgun and the average front door isn't a problem

    Do front doors only come in particle board where you come from?

  • Anon (unregistered) in reply to Matt Westwood
    Matt Westwood:
    I've just thought: did Steve then go and get a job as a security guard on the Jerry Springer show? He needs a show of his own, that man.

    He already has one:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Steve_Wilkos_Show

    Akismet says your comment was spam - fuck you akismet.

  • Jim Howard (unregistered)

    Here in Texas we have strong Castle law that explicitly allows a person to use force to stop an intruder who "unlawfully or forcefully enters or attempts to enter the victim’s place of residence, vehicle, or place of employment."

    Note that the OP doesn't have to wait for Steve to actually batter down his front door before using force to stop him.

    We don't have many home invasions here.

  • (cs)

    I am not meking any other coment except for one make with my registred name. Alex can verify this by check on IP address.

  • (cs) in reply to Nagesh
    Nagesh:
    I am not meking any other coment except for one make with my registred name.
    And frankly, even that's too many. :P
  • Tuan (unregistered) in reply to Remy Porter
    Remy Porter:
    ITT on TDWTF: ITGs, LOL.
    Wha?
  • Tuan (unregistered) in reply to Tuan
    Tuan:
    Remy Porter:
    ITT on TDWTF: ITGs, LOL.
    Wha?
    ITG = In the Groove? IT Geeks? IT Guns?
  • Fred (unregistered) in reply to ObiWayneKenobi
    ObiWayneKenobi:
    dohpaz42:
    Ave:
    Why is everybody implying there was a knife in the story?

    If one should receive a visit from his boss, one should automatically assume he would be carrying a knife?

    Is it something too American and I don't get it?

    In most U.S. states, it's only legal to kill an intruder if they were attacking you. So if somebody breaks in to your house, and you kill them, you "put a knife in their hand" so that you can claim self defense. It's an old running (almost inside) joke for us Americans.

    It doesn't even have to be a knife. If it's dark just something that could be mistaken for a knife or some kind of weapon. Had a cop actually tell me that trick once.

    Something like a hand perhaps? Most people have one of those...

  • Johnny English (unregistered) in reply to QJo
    QJo:
    Lord Snooty McPosh:
    Actually, if you calmly fetch a knife, you'll may well be charged. British courts have held that it's not self defense if you have time to go get a weapon. There was some talk of changing that, but I do not know the final outcome: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-13957587.

    Your word against his. "I happened to be in the kitchen, cutting up some steak ready to put it in the freezer for next week's barbecue, and suddenly I heard this crash ..."

    But of course his word's not going to be up to much, he's unfortunately turned up his toes.

    Right....so having stabbed him, we calmly return to the kitchen to cut up some steaks for an alibi....

  • a; weori (unregistered) in reply to Born Texas Proud
    Born Texas Proud:
    QJo:
    Grim Fandango:
    Yawn! at the macho posturing and "I would shoot him with my shotgun uzi grenade launching Machine gun" comments.

    Bah! I'd attack him with my police, which I would skilfully wield by means of the 911 on my telephone which I would be deploying from the lofty vantage point of behind the sofa.

    I don't live next-door to a police station.

    Why risk the possible property damage? Besides, when you find out it was an illegal alien, they'll just be shipped over the border and be back next week hopped up on drugs and tequila.

    On the other hand, if he's a legal alien we might need the Men in Black...

  • Jill (unregistered) in reply to Paul
    Paul:
    Patrick:
    Nederlander:
    Kudzu Kid:
    Every cop I know (and I know more than one...) has a "throw down" weapon. Ditto every home owner worth a sh*t. You know... that knife in the kitchen drawer that looks bad ass but you don't use much? Yeah, that one... That would end up in the hand of / or near / the intruder when the cops arrive.

    Wow... Odd stuff. I'm Dutch, but it's not quite common to have weapons lying around your house at all. Sure. there probably is a knife somewhere in the kitchen (most likely inside the dishwasher or some drawers between the forks and the spoons.)

    Aha, but leaving sports equipment by the door is perfectly fine. And last I checked, both Archery and Baseball are valid sports.

    Where I grew up, baseball bats were very popular sporting items. Nobody plays baseball there, though.

    Oh, T-Ball and Softball?

  • Jill (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    Paul:
    Patrick:
    Nederlander:
    Kudzu Kid:
    Every cop I know (and I know more than one...) has a "throw down" weapon. Ditto every home owner worth a sh*t. You know... that knife in the kitchen drawer that looks bad ass but you don't use much? Yeah, that one... That would end up in the hand of / or near / the intruder when the cops arrive.

    Wow... Odd stuff. I'm Dutch, but it's not quite common to have weapons lying around your house at all. Sure. there probably is a knife somewhere in the kitchen (most likely inside the dishwasher or some drawers between the forks and the spoons.)

    Aha, but leaving sports equipment by the door is perfectly fine. And last I checked, both Archery and Baseball are valid sports.

    Where I grew up, baseball bats were very popular sporting items. Nobody plays baseball there, though.

    They're especially convenient because they fit in the trunk of your car perfectly!
    Indeed. When I took up skiing, the skis wouldn't fit in the back of my car, so I bought a Baseball bat instead. Makes it a bit difficult to ski fast, but at least transport to and fro is simpler...

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