• ParkinT (cs)

    Ken Cox experienced REAL computer BUGS! Apparently, the colony of ants suffered a population OVERFLOW.

  • Jay (unregistered)

    RE Support Requirements: I presume that was for a job with the TSA. If you work for the government, it's called "airport screening". Anywhere else it's called "sexual harassment".

  • Jay (unregistered)

    RE E-Mail program: So Lukas, did you write this program for them? So you're the ones responsible for all the spam, eh?

  • Jay (unregistered)

    RE color and BBC: Just a year or so ago I was driving and passed a motel that had a big sign out front that said "Color TV!". With each letter of the word "color" in a different color, apparently just to reinforce the point.

    And of course I thought to myself, "Wow! They actually have color TVs at this motel? Are they associated with some high-tech electronics research lab or something?"

  • tweek (cs)

    Unfortunately, gross keyboards aren't rare. I remember when I worked as a desktop sysadmin, one of my coworkers had his own keyboard that he carried around with him in case he had to type something on someone else's machine.

    The worst I saw was one sales chick's keyboard whose keycaps were no longer speckled grey with black letters, but were absolutely black with what I assume was hand lotion (as she had a huge bottle of it on her desk, obsessively putting lotion on her hands) and dirt combined.

    MMmmm, greasy keys. I had to get her a new keyboard because she could no longer see her letters. And a new mouse because the greasy dirt clogged her mouse buttons. Both devices went directly into the dumpster.

  • Jay (unregistered)

    For a moment I was tempted to ask if "BBC" might not stand for some new technical feature of a television -- "balanced biometric chromatics" or something -- and that the problem was that the customer knew more than the salesman. But if the guy's first question was whether the TV had color ... probably not.

  • Anon (unregistered)

    Firrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrst.

    Edit: dangit, it took me too long to type all those r's!

  • ContraCorners (cs)

    Well, at least the subscription clerk didn't lie to you. You asked if she spilled anything and she told you she didn't.

    Of course she could have told you that she put something in the keyboard intentionally...

  • lolwtf (cs)

    Debugging: you're doing it wrong.

  • Not True (unregistered)

    Tneth! Also, the remote control story sounds made up.

  • Bort (unregistered)

    Is there a TV channel called "Colors" in the UK?

  • dubbreak (cs) in reply to Jay
    Jay:
    For a moment I was tempted to ask if "BBC" might not stand for some new technical feature of a television -- "balanced biometric chromatics" or something ..

    Bass boost circuit I'd bet. Bass boost and "enhancement" was all the rage in the late 90's.

  • Andy (unregistered) in reply to Bort
    Comment held for moderation.
  • Anketam (unregistered) in reply to Bort
    Comment held for moderation.
  • Justice (cs) in reply to Not True
    Not True:
    Tneth! Also, the remote control story sounds made up.

    Nah, it happens. I did that once with a guitar tuner; even brought it back to the shop and everything.

    In my defense, the batteries had come already in the compartment (should have realized something was off then; since when are batteries included?), and the plastic wrap was so thin as to be almost unnoticeable. I seriously didn't even realize the batteries were wrapped in plastic until the salesman pointed it out.

    TRWTF is that the guy hauled the entire TV back to the store instead of just the remote.

  • nakki (cs) in reply to Bort
    Bort:
    Is there a TV channel called "Colors" in the UK?
    I'm assuming, based on the name, that this happened in Scandinavia - you would most likely have needed cable or satellite to get BBC back then.
  • Bort (the other Bort) (unregistered) in reply to Bort
    Bort:
    Is there a TV channel called "Colors" in the UK?
    Ah, now that's a relief. For once, you didn't bring up something that I though of and was just about to post.

    I was getting worried there.

  • ~Nick~ (unregistered) in reply to Not True
    Not True:
    Tneth! Also, the remote control story sounds made up.

    I had a very similar thing happen to me. I helped a friend install a fan. It was a rather complex one with a fancy remote and a corresponding receiver. All looked good to me and she pressed the button on the remote to no avail. I checked the fan and found nothing. She retried the remote. I retried the remote and even looked at the batteries. We were both quite stumped. Then I took a second look at the batteries and saw the thin film of plastic. I handed it back to her and said "look at the batteries". She did but still didn't see the problem. It was only after I pointed out the plastic that she finally saw it. That stuff can be pretty thin.

    ~Nick~

  • Vajay (unregistered) in reply to Jay
    Jay:
    RE Support Requirements: I presume that was for a job with the TSA. If you work for the government, it's called "airport screening". Anywhere else it's called "sexual harassment".
    Yep. Although... "fingering, grasping, feeling" as well as "repetive motions" sounds a bit more than just harassment.

    I can't help noticing that the work requires "talking, hearing and seeing", but doesn't require listening or understanding.

    captcha: ingenium - the stuff of the geniuses

  • PRMan (unregistered)

    I worked in support and once had a worker complaining that her terminal was typing in weird characters and jumping around randomly. I asked her if she had any reason to believe her keyboard was malfunctioning. She said, "No." I picked up the keyboard and half a cup of coffee poured out all over her desk (I know I shouldn't have been happy that it ruined a student's application, but I kind of was). I said, "Why didn't you just tell me you accidentally spilled coffee in it? We have extra terminals and keyboards. It's no problem." No, instead I had coffee stains on my shirt and pants the rest of the day.

  • Papers Please (unregistered) in reply to Jay
    Jay:
    RE Support Requirements: I presume that was for a job with the TSA. If you work for the government, it's called "airport screening". Anywhere else it's called "sexual assault".

    FTFY.

  • fritters (unregistered)

    Bug spray! That's what I need to do my debugging! That's brillant!

  • Macho (unregistered) in reply to Jay
    Jay:
    For a moment I was tempted to ask if "BBC" might not stand for some new technical feature of a television

    I read that as BBS first, that would be surprising if someone wants BBS on their TV in 2000s

    Captcha: gravis. R.I.P. BBS

  • Capt Obvious (unregistered) in reply to Vajay
    Vajay:
    I can't help noticing that the work requires "talking, hearing and seeing", but doesn't require listening or understanding.
    It's clearly specified as listing the physical requirements. Listening and understanding are both mental.
  • Davie (unregistered)

    I the mid 80s I was working field support on Texas Instrument Buisness System. The systems had field replacable keyboard electronics. Being that this one customer was under a maintance contract I had to be sure problems were not from abuse. When using this one terminal the user could not depend on the key that was pressed was going to be the smae character that appeared on the screen. After going through the usual questions to find out when the problem started, no one knew anything about it. So I filpped the keyboard over to disassemble the bezel then filpped it backto install the electronics. Now there is a puddle of coffe on the desk where the KB was laying. Now I had to be a detective an find out who drank coffee with cream and no sugar.

  • shadowman (cs)

    Gah on the ants. No way in hell I'd just get a can of raid and keep going rather than simply requesting a new keyboard.

    Maybe she was a bit embarrassed about it, didn't want to cause trouble, or had some equally asinine reason for not doing so. Sort of makes sense, although it's misguided. But even in that case I'd just go out buy a new freakin' keyboard!

  • ThePants999 (cs) in reply to Justice
    Justice:
    TRWTF is that the guy hauled the entire TV back to the store instead of just the remote.
    Really? The guy's problem, from his perspective, was that the TV didn't work. He was wrong, but he didn't know that. Bringing in just the remote if your TV's broken would be a real WTF!
  • Matt Westwood (cs) in reply to Jay
    Jay:
    RE color and BBC: Just a year or so ago I was driving and passed a motel that had a big sign out front that said "Color TV!". With each letter of the word "color" in a different color, apparently just to reinforce the point.

    And of course I thought to myself, "Wow! They actually have color TVs at this motel? Are they associated with some high-tech electronics research lab or something?"

    Don't laugh. The last 5 hotels I've stayed at (all since 2000, in case you were going to ask), in places as widely spread as Florida, Nijmegen, Barcelona, Stockholm and Ytterby all had a 14-inch black-and-white TV which received about 4 channels. One of them had buttons for 8 channels, but 4 of them weren't tuned in to anything. I didn't care, I wasn't there to watch telly, I had stuff to do.

  • Fun and Games (unregistered) in reply to Matt Westwood
    Matt Westwood:
    Jay:
    RE color and BBC: Just a year or so ago I was driving and passed a motel that had a big sign out front that said "Color TV!". With each letter of the word "color" in a different color, apparently just to reinforce the point.

    And of course I thought to myself, "Wow! They actually have color TVs at this motel? Are they associated with some high-tech electronics research lab or something?"

    Don't laugh. The last 5 hotels I've stayed at (all since 2000, in case you were going to ask), in places as widely spread as Florida, Nijmegen, Barcelona, Stockholm and Ytterby all had a 14-inch black-and-white TV which received about 4 channels. One of them had buttons for 8 channels, but 4 of them weren't tuned in to anything. I didn't care, I wasn't there to watch telly, I had stuff to do.

    Pay-by-the-hour, eh?

  • Coyne (cs)

    The guy asking about the TV probably wanted to know if it supported Balanced Biological Communities.

    You know: Like the one in the keyboard. (Until she killed it!)

  • Matt Westwood (cs) in reply to Fun and Games
    Fun and Games:
    Matt Westwood:
    Jay:
    RE color and BBC: Just a year or so ago I was driving and passed a motel that had a big sign out front that said "Color TV!". With each letter of the word "color" in a different color, apparently just to reinforce the point.

    And of course I thought to myself, "Wow! They actually have color TVs at this motel? Are they associated with some high-tech electronics research lab or something?"

    Don't laugh. The last 5 hotels I've stayed at (all since 2000, in case you were going to ask), in places as widely spread as Florida, Nijmegen, Barcelona, Stockholm and Ytterby all had a 14-inch black-and-white TV which received about 4 channels. One of them had buttons for 8 channels, but 4 of them weren't tuned in to anything. I didn't care, I wasn't there to watch telly, I had stuff to do.

    Pay-by-the-hour, eh?

    Something like that. I was coining it in.

  • Radek (unregistered) in reply to Coyne

    A clerk has setup RAID on her computer back in 1994? Now that's a power-user!

  • Jellineck (unregistered)

    The government one makes sense. It's CYA. If someone without arms or legs applies for job stacking boxes at a warehouse, their application can legally be rejected as they have plainly stated that the applicant needs certain appendages and the functionality of those appendages to do be considered for the job.

  • Dimos (unregistered)

    I remember a customer once, back when I was in retail, asking me if we had any 15" monitors "expandable" to 17"

  • Eric (unregistered)

    Does the interweb have ftp?

  • Aussie (unregistered) in reply to Bort
    Bort:
    Is there a TV channel called "Colors" in the UK?
    Not likely. They can actually spell - they'd call it 'Colours'
  • Jim (unregistered) in reply to Justice
    Justice:
    Not True:
    Tneth! Also, the remote control story sounds made up.

    Nah, it happens. I did that once with a guitar tuner; even brought it back to the shop and everything.

    In my defense, the batteries had come already in the compartment (should have realized something was off then; since when are batteries included?), and the plastic wrap was so thin as to be almost unnoticeable. I seriously didn't even realize the batteries were wrapped in plastic until the salesman pointed it out.

    TRWTF is that the guy hauled the entire TV back to the store instead of just the remote.

    Why is that TRWTF? He didn't know it was the remote not working. He assumed the TV didn't work - a reasonable assumption, I would think....

    If they have remotes, though, they normally also have buttons on the telly. Pressing any of these should pop them out of Standby mode, but I guess people may not have always realised this (or perhaps it wasn't always the case)...

  • Some Guy (unregistered) in reply to Vajay
    Vajay:
    Jay:
    RE Support Requirements: I presume that was for a job with the TSA. If you work for the government, it's called "airport screening". Anywhere else it's called "sexual harassment".
    Yep. Although... "fingering, grasping, feeling" as well as "repetive motions" sounds a bit more than just harassment.

    I can't help noticing that the work requires "talking, hearing and seeing", but doesn't require listening or understanding.

    captcha: ingenium - the stuff of the geniuses

    I think I know where Zunesis works...
  • awsa (unregistered) in reply to Macho
    Macho:
    Jay:
    For a moment I was tempted to ask if "BBC" might not stand for some new technical feature of a television

    I read that as BBS first, that would be surprising if someone wants BBS on their TV in 2000s

    Captcha: gravis. R.I.P. BBS

    But we seem to be talking well before 2000....If it's one of the earliest 32inch CRT's (although it also says 'widescreen', which is kind of interesting), then I'm thinking we're talking (early-mid) 90s...

  • Barrista (unregistered) in reply to Davie
    Davie:
    I the mid 80s I was working field support on Texas Instrument Buisness System. The systems had field replacable keyboard electronics. Being that this one customer was under a maintance contract I had to be sure problems were not from abuse. When using this one terminal the user could not depend on the key that was pressed was going to be the smae character that appeared on the screen. After going through the usual questions to find out when the problem started, no one knew anything about it. So I filpped the keyboard over to disassemble the bezel then filpped it backto install the electronics. Now there is a puddle of coffe on the desk where the KB was laying. Now I had to be a detective an find out who drank coffee with cream and no sugar.
    Customer: "I'll have a coffee, no cream" Shop Assistant: "I'm sorry, we don't have cream" Customer: "You'd better make it no milk, then"
  • SmartArse (unregistered) in reply to Matt Westwood
    Matt Westwood:
    Jay:
    RE color and BBC: Just a year or so ago I was driving and passed a motel that had a big sign out front that said "Color TV!". With each letter of the word "color" in a different color, apparently just to reinforce the point.

    And of course I thought to myself, "Wow! They actually have color TVs at this motel? Are they associated with some high-tech electronics research lab or something?"

    Don't laugh. The last 5 hotels I've stayed at (all since 2000, in case you were going to ask), in places as widely spread as Florida, Nijmegen, Barcelona, Stockholm and Ytterby all had a 14-inch black-and-white TV which received about 4 channels. One of them had buttons for 8 channels, but 4 of them weren't tuned in to anything. I didn't care, I wasn't there to watch telly, I had stuff to do.

    Maybe they're putting you up in the security room? I watch enough telly to know all security tapes are Black and White.

  • Dzov (unregistered) in reply to Aussie
    Aussie:
    Bort:
    Is there a TV channel called "Colors" in the UK?
    Not likely. They can actually spell - they'd call it 'Colours'
    Wouldn't that change the pronunciation to something like Col-hours? Granted, they talk funny over there, but really?
  • Abso (cs) in reply to Dzov
    Dzov:
    Aussie:
    Bort:
    Is there a TV channel called "Colors" in the UK?
    Not likely. They can actually spell - they'd call it 'Colours'
    Wouldn't that change the pronunciation to something like Col-hours? Granted, they talk funny over there, but really?
    I'm pretty sure they still pronounce the last syllable the same as in words like labour, humour, and neighbour.
  • method1 (cs) in reply to Dzov
    Dzov:
    Wouldn't that change the pronunciation to something like Col-hours?

    No,the pronunciation is more like 'Colours' really. Isn't 'Colors' pronounced Col-laws then? Surely a more 'phonetic' spelling would be 'kullers' or something like that - losing the 'U' makes sense I suppose if you're being charged per character for some reason. I know not everyone in the US uses this spelling. but 'nabor' for 'neighbour' is disturbing. Once you start simplifying spelling to excess, its a short step to saying 'doubleplusungood' & Richard Burton pulling your teeth out.

  • Aussie (unregistered) in reply to Dzov
    Dzov:
    Aussie:
    Bort:
    Is there a TV channel called "Colors" in the UK?
    Not likely. They can actually spell - they'd call it 'Colours'
    Wouldn't that change the pronunciation to something like Col-hours? Granted, they talk funny over there, but really?
    Probably closer to the sound 'our' makes in 'your' (without the Yankee drawl)
  • simon (unregistered) in reply to method1

    I don't think they go overboard on it. In fact I found out recently that the US generally doesn't accept "learnt", "spelt", "leapt" etc. opting instead for the "-ed" form of each. I also found out that we used to "cooked" used to be spelt "cookt".

  • simon (unregistered) in reply to simon
    simon:
    I don't think they go overboard on it. In fact I found out recently that the US generally doesn't accept "learnt", "spelt", "leapt" etc. opting instead for the "-ed" form of each. I also found out that "cooked" used to be spelt "cookt".

    FTFM

  • Muzer (unregistered) in reply to awsa

    Britain was a VERY early adopter of widescreen. Most shows made after about 2000 in this country are probably in widescreen (my date might be slightly out there). That's why we've been relatively slow adopters of HD - for many non-technical people I know from America, the only difference between SD and HD is that HD is wider, so without an obvious difference like that here, people without great eyesight don't care :p

    So yeah, widescreen CRT in 2000 is not unlikely.

    (Also, for those with little to no knowledge of British TV, the BBC is one of the four* "public-service" broadcasters, and the only one funded by the TV licence fee (rather than by advertising - ie it has no adverts)). The vast majority of people use terrestrial TV (even more so in 2000), so virtually everyone can get BBC and the other public-service channels - nowadays all PSB channels are carried on analogue terrestrial (in areas not yet switched off), digital terrestrial, cable and free-to-air on satellite.

    *actually more if you count all the ITV licences and Teletext which is only a PSB in official terms nowadays - I'm counting 8 distinct PSB broadcasting companies (BBC, Channel 4, Channel 5, Teletext, ITV plc, STV, UTV, Channel TV).

  • Bloer (unregistered) in reply to simon
    simon:
    simon:
    I don't think they go overboard on it. In fact I found out recently that the US generally doesn't accept "learnt", "spelt", "leapt" etc. opting instead for the "-ed" form of each. I also found out that "cooked" used to be spelt "cookt".

    FTFM

    Isn't the 't' older than 'ed' ending? That would mean they ARE going overboard on the changes.

    I can find at least two uses of this sort of vowel formation in US english: burnt, knelt (also slept, I guess)

  • simon (unregistered) in reply to Bloer

    Yeah, -t is older than -ed. Everybody spells it "cooked", but the -t forms seem to be disappearing but are alive and well in the UK at least. I would've thought from what I've read that slept and knelt weren't used much in the US (although they should be pronounced with a "t" rather than "d" sound), but I think burnt is used more as an adjective and burned is used more as a past-tense verb or participle.

    Despite all that, I really have no problem with "color" or "neighbor". English pronunciation isn't half as consistent as a lot of other languages so they're only dropping the odd letter. Plus, when you look into things like this you tend to find that both and possibly more forms were acceptable and different countries just standardised differently. Americans have to remember what's -ize and what's -ise so I don't envy them.

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