Recent Feature Articles

Apr 2012

Classic WTF: Behavioral Deficiencies

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I'm on vacation this week and am a bit behind on all things TDWTF; so, here's Behavioral Deficiencies. It's a classic that was originally published on February 28, 2008.

Shawn O. was not used to bright lights, smiling faces, or greetings like “hi Shawn, how are you today?” In fact, just about anything that wasn’t specifically intended to bring pain and misery to all had become foreign to him. It was simply par for the course. Shawn, after all, was an Oracle DBA. And not just any Oracle DBA, but one who sat on the company’s Database Code Review Council.

140 comments - Last comment @ 2012-08-14

The Core Launcher

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“You R haccking files on my computer~!!!” Charles Carmichael read in a newly-submitted support ticket, “this is illigle and I will sue your whoal compiny. But first I will tell every1 nevar to buy youre stupid game agin.”

The bizarre spelling and vague threats were par for the course. After all, when you market and sell a game to the general public, you can expect a certain percentage of bizarre and vague customer communications. When that game is a popular MMPORG (no, not that one), that percentage tends to hover around the majority.

200 comments - Last comment @ 2017-05-16

Difficult Personality

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It was Steve's first week on the job, and he had plenty of questions about the code base and the new features he was supposed to implement. He muddled through for most of the week, but Friday morning he hit a brick wall and needed to talk to Bill, the architect.

"Can I meet with you for like an hour to go over things?" Steve asked.

224 comments - Last comment @ 2013-03-01

Missing Files, The Amazing Print Driver, and More Support Stories

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Women ARE from Moires! (from Shane)
As the net admin for a small municipality, I don't get to do front-line support much anymore, but a few years ago, I fielded one that was rather bizarre. A user called complaining about distortion on her CRT... it looked all... "melted". Their office was just down the hall so I went over and sure enough, the display was badly mangled. Degaussing didn't help. Then I noticed a foot-long fluorescent light affixed to the bottom of the metal shelf above the monitor.

"Has that always been there?" I asked her. "Yes, she replied, but I just moved the computer here, it used to be over there..."

106 comments - Last comment @ 2024-10-12
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