The Daily WTF: Curious Perversions in Information Technology

ParkinT · 2012-09-20 Reply Admin

“...but when I show you how it works, don’t hold it against me.” I have lost count of how many times I have said something very similar.

PERSONAL RANT: "Irregardless" IS NOT A WORD!!!!

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

ParkinT:
“...but when I show you how it works, don’t hold it against me.” I have lost count of how many times *I* have said something very similar.

Yup, that sounds very familiar. Stuff often times look weird two years after you made it.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Where in this process is the ticket text passed? Does Jesse's code try to write a file called "I have the following problem with my printer driver. It does not translate to french."?

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Remy has been playing a touch too much skyrim methinks.

I wonder what sort of affect that shout would have in game? I'm guessing it would trigger a general protection fault.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

ParkinT:
"Irregardless" IS NOT A WORD!!!!

When I heard a guy doing narration on some old 30s or 40s B&W movie I watching one day use the non-word "irregardless," I decided that battle would never be won.

ALSO, this isn't enough of a WTF, I mean, where are the LAZORS to the Moon??

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

ParkinT:
"Irregardless" IS NOT A WORD!!!!

Read the HTML comments

TGV · 2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Robert:
ParkinT:
"Irregardless" IS NOT A WORD!!!!
Read the HTML comments

ORIGIN early 20th cent.: probably a blend of irrespective and regardless. usage: Irregardless is widely heard, perhaps arising under the influence of such perfectly correct forms as irrespective, but should be avoided by careful users of English. Use regardless to mean ‘without regard or consideration for’ or ‘nevertheless’.

Reading HTML comments is the greater WTF.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Paula Bean:
Where in this process is the ticket text passed? Does Jesse's code try to write a file called "I have the following problem with my printer driver. It does not translate to french."?

Unless I misunderstood, the TicketGenerator tries to write a file and can't. The Monitor catches the error, records EVERYTHING from the error (including the data from the file as metadata), passes that to the FTP site, where it is processed as an API call, which has the ticket information as metadata and creates the new ticket.

Oh, yeah. When reading a Remy story (as opposed to a CodeSOD), always read the story in page source (unless you have some other way to read HTML comments from the webpage). I heard that someone had created a Remify add-on for firefox? That would be useful.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

emaNrouY-Here:
Oh, yeah. When reading a Remy story (as opposed to a CodeSOD), always read the story in page source (unless you have some other way to read HTML comments from the webpage). I heard that someone had created a Remify add-on for firefox? That would be useful.

I use Chrome's "Inspect Element" (Firefox has an equivalent feature built-in, and it also has the Firebug plugin which is way better) to read the comments.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

I think this is a beautifull lesson in life and I think many of us recognize a part of our life in this.. Many times, you have to do things in a WTF way, because you just can't do it any other way.. That's sad!

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

qazwsx:
emaNrouY-Here:
Oh, yeah. When reading a Remy story (as opposed to a CodeSOD), always read the story in page source (unless you have some other way to read HTML comments from the webpage). I heard that someone had created a Remify add-on for firefox? That would be useful.

I use Chrome's "Inspect Element" (Firefox has an equivalent feature built-in, and it also has the Firebug plugin which is way better) to read the comments.

Actually, scratch that. Neither Firebug nor Firefox's built-in tool show comments, at least in any obviously visible way. I guess it's Chrome or nothing.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

There goes the weekend...

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Don't forget to click on COBOL.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Danielle:
I think this is a beautifull lesson in life and I think many of us recognize a part of our life in this.. Many times, you have to do things in a WTF way, because you just can't do it any other way.. That's sad!

I think this is known as the Rube Goldberg machine.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

emaNrouY-Here:
Oh, yeah. When reading a Remy story (as opposed to a CodeSOD), always read the story in page source (unless you have some other way to read HTML comments from the webpage). I heard that someone had created a Remify add-on for firefox? That would be useful.

I've been missing so much for so long...

captcha: suscipere - For when it is suspected you will disapear

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

qazwsx:
qazwsx:
emaNrouY-Here:
Oh, yeah. When reading a Remy story (as opposed to a CodeSOD), always read the story in page source (unless you have some other way to read HTML comments from the webpage). I heard that someone had created a Remify add-on for firefox? That would be useful.

I use Chrome's "Inspect Element" (Firefox has an equivalent feature built-in, and it also has the Firebug plugin which is way better) to read the comments.

Actually, scratch that. Neither Firebug nor Firefox's built-in tool show comments, at least in any obviously visible way. I guess it's Chrome or nothing.

"Page source" (or whatever the wording in english) did it for me.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

C20? C21 maybe...

http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=regardless%2Cirregardless&year_start=2000&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

The Lions:
Danielle:
I think this is a beautifull lesson in life and I think many of us recognize a part of our life in this.. Many times, you have to do things in a WTF way, because you just can't do it any other way.. That's sad!

I think this is known as the Rube Goldberg machine.

Yeah! You're rigth! It is like a Rube Goldberg machine! Although I'm not sure it's the best thing in programming to make Rube Goldberg machines ;-)

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Loved the story. Thank you for sharing!

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Danielle:
I'm not sure it's the best thing in programming to make Rube Goldberg machines ;-)

You'd be in the minority. Ever heard of J2EE?

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

A few years from now after Jesse is gone, another developer will see his ticket system and, without knowledge of why it's so messed up, will re-submit it as a CodeSOD.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

I used to be a programmer like you, then I took a WTF in the knee.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Ben:
emaNrouY-Here:
Oh, yeah. When reading a Remy story (as opposed to a CodeSOD), always read the story in page source (unless you have some other way to read HTML comments from the webpage). I heard that someone had created a Remify add-on for firefox? That would be useful.

I've been missing so much for so long...

captcha: suscipere - For when it is suspected you will disapear

Some of the comments for a previous remy article have some good examples of bookmarklets and/or userscripts that will do the job for you.

http://thedailywtf.com/Comments/The-Reporting-System.aspx

ubersoldat · 2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Hmmm... Jesse at least didn't use XML in the files he threw against the mainframe. If he did, then it's a wrap and got a "WTF" sticker.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

ubersoldat:
Hmmm... Jesse at least didn't use XML in the files he threw against the mainframe. If he did, then it's a wrap and got a "WTF" sticker.

XML is being much bester solution instead of flat filing.

alexgieg · 2012-09-20 Reply Admin

The Lions:
I think this is known as the Rube Goldberg design pattern.

FTFY.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

The Lions:
Danielle:
I'm not sure it's the best thing in programming to make Rube Goldberg machines ;-)
You'd be in the minority. Ever heard of J2EE?

I heard about it but never tried it. I program in C++ and do a lot of SQL.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

qazwsx:
emaNrouY-Here:
Oh, yeah. When reading a Remy story (as opposed to a CodeSOD), always read the story in page source (unless you have some other way to read HTML comments from the webpage). I heard that someone had created a Remify add-on for firefox? That would be useful.

I use Chrome's "Inspect Element" (Firefox has an equivalent feature built-in, and it also has the Firebug plugin which is way better) to read the comments.

Here's a bookmarklet that will do the thing (both in article view and the comment's view):

javascript:(function(){var b=document.getElementById('ArticleFull')||document.getElementsByClassName('ArticleBody')[0];b.innerHTML=b.innerHTML.replace(/<!\-\-/g,'<span style="color: green;">').replace(/\-\->/g,'');})()

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

emaNrouY-Here:
Paula Bean:
Where in this process is the ticket text passed? Does Jesse's code try to write a file called "I have the following problem with my printer driver. It does not translate to french."?
Unless I misunderstood, the TicketGenerator tries to write a file and can't. The Monitor catches the error, records EVERYTHING from the error (including the data from the file as metadata), passes that to the FTP site, where it is processed as an API call, which has the ticket information as metadata and creates the new ticket.
Oh, yeah. When reading a Remy story (as opposed to a CodeSOD), always read the story in page source (unless you have some other way to read HTML comments from the webpage). I heard that someone had created a Remify add-on for firefox? That would be useful.

Not quite an addon, but a bookmarklet:

javascript:function%20remify()%20{%20%20%20%20%20if%20(window.remified)%20return;%20%20%20%20%20var%20m%20=%20document.getElementById("MainContent");%20%20%20%20%20if%20(!m)%20return;%20%20%20%20%20var%20ch%20=%20m.children;%20%20%20%20%20while%20(ch.length)%20{%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20var%20c%20=%20ch[0];%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20if%20(ch.shift)%20{%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20ch.shift();%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20}%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20else%20{%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20var%20chs%20=%20new%20Array();%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20for(var%20i=1;%20i<ch.length;%20++i)%20{%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20chs.push(ch[i]);%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20}%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20ch=chs;%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20}%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20if%20(c.nodeType%20==%208)%20{%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20var%20cn%20=%20document.createElement("span");%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20cn.style.backgroundColor%20=%20"lightgray";%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20var%20remy%20=%20document.createElement("b");%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20remy.appendChild(document.createTextNode("Remy:%20"));%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20cn.appendChild(remy);%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20cn.appendChild(document.createTextNode(c.data.replace(/(^\\s*|\\s*$)/g,%20'')));%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20c.parentNode.insertBefore(cn,%20c);%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20c.parentNode.insertBefore(document.createTextNode('%20'),c);%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20}%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20else%20{%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20var%20chn%20=%20c.childNodes;%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20for(var%20i=0;%20i<chn.length;%20++i)%20{%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20ch.push(chn[i]);%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20}%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20}%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20if%20(%20(c.getAttribute)%20&&%20(c.getAttribute("onclick")=="cornify_add();return%20false;")%20)%20{%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20c.style.backgroundColor%20=%20"pink";%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20%20}%20%20%20%20%20}%20%20%20%20%20window.remified=true;%20};%20remify();
</pre>
Simply add as bookmark, click on it, be done.

snoofle · 2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Danielle:
The Lions:
Danielle:
I'm not sure it's the best thing in programming to make Rube Goldberg machines ;-)
You'd be in the minority. Ever heard of J2EE?

I heard about it but never tried it. I program in C++ and do a lot of SQL.

Count your blessings.

minitech · 2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Irregardless, it could have been a joke.

minitech · 2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Why didn't you minify that? Why didn't you take out the spaces, at least? Why did you use new Array()? Most importantly, why did you indent using five spaces?

Also,

javascript:(function(b){b.innerHTML=b.innerHTML.replace(/<!--/g,'<span style="color:red;">').replace(/-->/g,'')})(document.querySelector('.ArticleBody'))

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

ParkinT : PERSONAL RANT: "Irregardless" IS NOT A WORD!!!!

English is a living language. You may not like that, but irregardless, that's the way it is. Irrelated question, how do you do a proper quote on this site?

lanmind · 2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Danielle:
I think this is a beautifull lesson in life and I think many of us recognize a part of our life in this.. Many times, you have to do things in a WTF way, because you just can't do it any other way.. That's sad!

Yep, it happened to me just yesterday. The app vendor for our payroll package uses a "novel" approach to security to keep anyone but their web app from calling their stored procs. Normally in this sort of a situation I would wrap it in a proc and do an EXECUTE AS USER = '<user>', but their code actually prevents this from working.

To get around it, I threw the call to the proc I want to hit into an after insert trigger on a throw away table. When it's time to run the proc I insert a record.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

PERSONAL RANT: "Irregardless" IS NOT A WORD!!!![/quote]

Merriam-Webster disagrees with you (my emphasis added):

The most frequently repeated remark about it is that “there is no such word.” There is such a word, however. It is still used primarily in speech, although it can be found from time to time in edited prose. Its reputation has not risen over the years, and it is still a long way from general acceptance. Use regardless instead.

Zylon · 2012-09-20 Reply Admin

A flat-file what, Remy?

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

ParkinT:
"Irregardless" IS NOT A WORD!!!!

It's a perfectly cromulent word. It is constructed according to the perfectly legitimate rules of word amalgamation of English, by prefixing "ir-" to the word "regardless", which is constructed by suffixing "-less" to the word "regard".

Both "ir-" and "-less" indicate a negation of meaning (i.e. change the amalgamated word X to without-X), so "irregardless" means without-without-regard.

So it's a word, but it means the opposite of its common usage.

I use it regardless of its connotation, irregardless of its denotation. You're free to disregard its use, or continue to regard it as unacceptable.

--Joe

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

emaNrouY-Here:
Oh, yeah. When reading a Remy story (as opposed to a CodeSOD), always read the story in page source (unless you have some other way to read HTML comments from the webpage). I heard that someone had created a Remify add-on for firefox? That would be useful.

And here is the "Remify!"-bookmarklet with a little extra (in true Remy-spirit):

Pure JS:

javascript:(function(){var b=document.getElementById('ArticleFull')||document.getElementsByClassName('ArticleBody')[0];if(b){var dialog=document.createElement('div'),info=document.createElement('div'),infoText=document.createElement('p'),img=document.createElement('img');img.src='http://www.masswerk.at/cornifiedLoader/cornifiedloader.gif';dialog.style.cssText="position:fixed;top:0;bottom:0;left:0;right:0;z-index:9999;";info.style.cssText='background-color:white;width:360px;margin:200px auto 0 auto;padding:20px;text-align:center;border:1px solid #CCC;';infoText.style.cssText='font-family:"Comic Sans MS","Marker Felt";font-size:20px;margin:0;padding:0;color:#F93;text-align:center;';infoText.innerHTML='Processing ...';info.appendChild(img);info.appendChild(infoText);dialog.appendChild(info);document.getElementsByTagName('body')[0].appendChild(dialog);window.setTimeout(function(){dialog.parentNode.removeChild(dialog);},3250);b.innerHTML=b.innerHTML.replace(/<!\-\-/g,'<span style="color: green;">').replace(/\-\->/g,'');if (b.id=='ArticleFull')b.style.display='block';}})()

HTML-version (sorry, can't post a full anchor-code, href only):

href="javascript:(function(){var%20b=document.getElementById('ArticleFull')||document.getElementsByClassName('ArticleBody')[0];if(b){var%20dialog=document.createElement('div'),info=document.createElement('div'),infoText=document.createElement('p'),img=document.createElement('img');img.src='http://www.masswerk.at/cornifiedLoader/cornifiedloader.gif';dialog.style.cssText="position:fixed;top:0;bottom:0;left:0;right:0;z-index:9999;";info.style.cssText='background-color:white;width:360px;margin:200px%20auto%200%20auto;padding:20px;text-align:center;border:1px%20solid%20#CCC;';infoText.style.cssText='font-family:"Comic%20Sans%20MS","Marker%20Felt";font-size:20px;margin:0;padding:0;color:#F93;text-align:center;';infoText.innerHTML='Processing%20...';info.appendChild(img);info.appendChild(infoText);dialog.appendChild(info);document.getElementsByTagName('body')[0].appendChild(dialog);window.setTimeout(function(){dialog.parentNode.removeChild(dialog);},3250);b.innerHTML=b.innerHTML.replace(/<!\-\-/g,'<span%20style="color:%20green;">').replace(/\-\->/g,'</span>');if%20(b.id=='ArticleFull')b.style.display='block';}})()"

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

The Lions:
Danielle:
I think this is a beautifull lesson in life and I think many of us recognize a part of our life in this.. Many times, you have to do things in a WTF way, because you just can't do it any other way.. That's sad!

I think this is known as the Rube Goldberg machine.

I think this is known as "middleware".

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Ad "Remify!": And even a bit better (revised timing) ...

Pure JS:

javascript:(function(){var b=document.getElementById('ArticleFull')||document.getElementsByClassName('ArticleBody')[0];if(b){var dialog=document.createElement('div'),info=document.createElement('div'),infoText=document.createElement('p'),img=document.createElement('img');img.src='http://www.masswerk.at/cornifiedLoader/cornifiedloader.gif';dialog.style.cssText="position:fixed;top:0;bottom:0;left:0;right:0;z-index:9999;";info.style.cssText='background-color:white;width:360px;margin:200px auto 0 auto;padding:20px;text-align:center;border:1px solid #CCC;';infoText.style.cssText='font-family:"Comic Sans MS","Marker Felt";font-size:20px;margin:0;padding:0;color:#F93;text-align:center;';infoText.innerHTML='Processing ...';info.appendChild(img);info.appendChild(infoText);dialog.appendChild(info);document.getElementsByTagName('body')[0].appendChild(dialog);window.setTimeout(function(){b.innerHTML=b.innerHTML.replace(/<!\-\-/g,'<span style="color: green;">').replace(/\-\->/g,'');if (b.id=='ArticleFull')b.style.display='block';dialog.parentNode.removeChild(dialog);},3250);}})()

HTML-version:

href="javascript:(function(){var%20b=document.getElementById('ArticleFull')||document.getElementsByClassName('ArticleBody')[0];if(b){var%20dialog=document.createElement('div'),info=document.createElement('div'),infoText=document.createElement('p'),img=document.createElement('img');img.src='http://www.masswerk.at/cornifiedLoader/cornifiedloader.gif';dialog.style.cssText="position:fixed;top:0;bottom:0;left:0;right:0;z-index:9999;";info.style.cssText='background-color:white;width:360px;margin:200px%20auto%200%20auto;padding:20px;text-align:center;border:1px%20solid%20#CCC;';infoText.style.cssText='font-family:"Comic%20Sans%20MS","Marker%20Felt";font-size:20px;margin:0;padding:0;color:#F93;text-align:center;';infoText.innerHTML='Processing%20...';info.appendChild(img);info.appendChild(infoText);dialog.appendChild(info);document.getElementsByTagName('body')[0].appendChild(dialog);window.setTimeout(function(){b.innerHTML=b.innerHTML.replace(/<!\-\-/g,'<span%20style="color:%20green;">').replace(/\-\->/g,'</span>');if%20(b.id=='ArticleFull')b.style.display='block';dialog.parentNode.removeChild(dialog);},3250);}})()"

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Mr Keith:
The Lions:
Danielle:
I think this is a beautifull lesson in life and I think many of us recognize a part of our life in this.. Many times, you have to do things in a WTF way, because you just can't do it any other way.. That's sad!

I think this is known as the Rube Goldberg machine.

I think this is known as "middleware".

Rube-Goldberg-ware!

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Danielle:
The Lions:
Ever heard of J2EE?
I heard about it but never tried it. I program in C++ and do a lot of SQL.

I'd love to go back to C++. But now my life is full of the nightmare that never ends. It pays the bills.

Nexzus · 2012-09-20 Reply Admin

I've mentioned this before, but here's something I did at my last job. (IT for a collection agency) Scenario: Windows environment; Client Access accessing an AS/400; Cisco Callmanager IP PhoneSystem. Client Access has its own Macro language with shortcut keys, and has a COM object. Objective: Dial a phone number on the screen to the users phone using a shortcut key in Client Access. How: Pressing the shortcut key called a CA macro. This macro called a local javascript windows script host file. This local javascript:

grabbed the phone number from the screen with the CA COM object
requested, via XMLHttpObject, an Intranet URL, with the above phone number as an argument. (Client Access's macro language lacked this functionality, hence the need for another script, and we found network share latency issues sometimes caused it not to work, hence it being a local script The (asp) script at this URL:
used the REMOTE_USER ev to lookup the IP Phone field from Active Directory.
looked up the IP Address of that IP phone from Callmanager.
POST'ed a dial command to the internal webserver of that IP phone. The phone dialled the number.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

That's nice...

Yazeran · 2012-09-20 Reply Admin

The Lions:
Danielle:
I think this is a beautifull lesson in life and I think many of us recognize a part of our life in this.. Many times, you have to do things in a WTF way, because you just can't do it any other way.. That's sad!

I think this is known as the Rube Goldberg machine.

Yep, like my first technological WTF:

Some 13 years ago I started on my PhD and got to work with a newly build contact dilatometer (system for measuring changes in the height of a sample to a precision of 1 to 2 micrometer as a function of temperature, atmosphere and mechanical load).

The system was situated in a non-ideal position making it necessary to walk around a pillar between changing some parameters and telling the system to do a measurement and log it.

I didn't want to spend all my day changing something, getting up from the chair and walk some 4 meters, push the space bar on a keyboard and then walk back again, so I acquired an eraser, a foll of tape, a straightedge, 10 meters of 1mm diameter wire and 2 weights (one 1 kg, the other 4 kg) as I had noticed that at a height of 3 meters ran some of those cable racks/trays. I fixed it so that the eraser and straightedge made sure that when the small weight descended from the string it was attached to it would push the space bar on the keyboard. Thus I could sit on the other side and adjust the test parameters and then just lift the 4 kg weight to to a measurement.

I can still remember the face of one of the senior lab technicians when he walk through the lab and noticed the setup. He suddenly stopped and looked paralysed as his head followed the small weight going up and down for some 20 seconds before he nearly choked on his laughter.

The setup didn't last long however, as some of the higher up's thought that it looked far to much like a rube Goldberg contraption for their taste, however the test system was changed so that the measuring system was moved so it could be reached from the workstation (a change I had originally asked for but couldn't get approval for).

So sometimes you have to build / code some strange contraption to get your work done.

Yours Yazeran

Plan: To go to Mars one day with a hammer.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

With this method of grabbing the contents of files which cannot be created we don't even need a filesystem. Genius.

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Yazeran:
I acquired an eraser, a foll of tape, a straightedge, 10 meters of 1mm diameter wire...

Silly me, I'd have just gotten an extension cord for the keyboard and brought it over to the other workstation...

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Internet Explorer: F12

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

WTF is everyone talking about?!

2012-09-20 Reply Admin

Squire:
"Irregardless" IS NOT A WORD!!!!
Use regardless instead.

When two words have exactly the same meaning, use the shorter one.

Unless of course you are an ignorant pompous blowhard.

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