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Admin
I've worked with a girl that was a duplicate of this Megan. Our boss hired her because she was attractive (his own words - but they were true). This girl was terrible at programming.
What she lacked in coding she made up for in being able to convince you otherwise. After she got fired from our company (after a year), she later got hired as the lead developer of a very large financial institution.
Sad technical type men are a sucker for an attractive girl that'll talk to them.
Admin
I believe the code part, but I don't buy the promotion stuff, sorry.
Admin
I have a good idea how someone like this became a programmer. I've seen it before. She did some work in some commercial package or another that impressed her manager. Maybe it was a set of complicated Excel formulas, maybe it was just exporting CSV files... whatever it was, it was something her manager didn't know could be done. The manager, the truly clueless one in this story, thought to himself, "Wow, she really knows that computer stuff!" The manager then started giving her more and more technical tasks; after all, that 'computer stuff' is really pretty much the same. As such, there was no need to waste time and money with training.
So, it wasn't her fault she was in over her head. Her mistakes were not so much dumb as they were just incorrect assumptions based on a lack of experience.
Admin
Your example I would take as a good case, you thought of linked lists and pointers and got it to work even though you didn't know about arrays!? Sounds like a good problem solver to me, even if a little training is in order.
Then there's the hacks that prove the person shouldn't be allowed to drive let alone breed.
Admin
Maybe you are missing MustBeUsersFault's point:
Scenario A: Using a linked list because you have made an informed decision that it suits your needs best. => Fine.
Scenario B: Using a linked list because you don't know what an array is. => WTF?
And even in scenario A, it's usually not a good idea to roll your own linked list implementation given that many libraries will give you a well-tested and interoperable implementation for free.
Admin
I'm going to have to go with this as well. I've seen more than a few geeky, middle-aged manager types hire based on looks. And not just of the "secretary who looks like his college sweetheart" type, either. Don't get me started on interns...
It's a sad commentary that when I read the end of the article one immediate thought which popped into my head was "I wonder if she's pretty?" (This was followed shortly by "I wonder who she's related to?") Because sometimes, all you need is superficial beauty.
It would be tough to be a pretty and smart woman. Try to get ahead on brains, people always thinking it's looks...
Admin
The real WTF is that Sebastian wasn't fired for foisting such terrible programming practices on Megan.
Admin
The union query did not use a WHERE clause already...
O well, I've seen my share of these:
PLSQL does not have a SLEEP function... Only in the DBMS_LOCK package, which is owned by sys... So my company implemented our own version (i found some duffis posted this "fix" online somewheres when I was doing my own research)
loop
for i in 1... (seconds * 1000) loop j := j + 1; end loop;
if(<get time> >= expected_time) then end loop; end if;
end loop;
(sorry my plsql is rusty) needless to say once management saw this (because i said that I cannot use this function in my code) their eyes popped out... Now we just call java's Thread.sleep(seconds) by using the pl/sql -> java mapping capabilities. I believe it works a BIT better no?
Oh wait sorry there was a bug out once about this. The fix was... try to get DBMS_LOCK package access rights, otherwise do the loop of loopening...
Admin
I've seen such promotions take place.
Don't kid yourself, where do all the managers come from if not from foolish promotions.
Admin
er... you may want to re-read the query, chief ;)
Admin
Usually this type of programmer didn't get hired to do that but fell into the position by accident. Then they stay forever in the one job. Often they can keep this job only because the management is even more clueless.
CATCHTA: doom
Admin
I'm sorry, but... while the PL/SQL was positively horrible, why would you ever use sleep() in a stored procedure anyway? Please don't say "so we don't have to do proper locking". :-o
Wait, I remember one legitimate application but now my head hurts. Again.
Admin
Admin
Delphi?
Admin
That's ok, I'll promote you on your merits and we can still have sex so the rumor mill will have something to talk about.
Admin
Admin
The last line of this article literally made me head-desk.
Admin
Admin
Admin
If it was anything like my last place, the worst programmer has spent all their time taking credit for what you've been doing and saying that you haven't been doing anything all year.
Even with CVS records and repeated demos of incompetence, the incompetent one will be kept on, and you'll be fired.
Admin
Oh, you thought I meant to type the French word meaning "there it is"? No, I actually meant the musical instrument. Because... she.. got promoted because she could play the viola!
hangs head in shame
Admin
Woa nobody cares ? sob..
Admin
I worked with a worthless Russian woman that was similar. I was hired with a year of experience and thought I would help out those programmings that were being retrained and starting with the new application/language. This woman had been through very expensive training on the new language*, so she should've had some idea. Nope. I would help her out and give her pseudo code in Notepad. I'd email it to her and an hour later she would come back and say it didn't work/compile. Totally worthless. She spent the next two years on the project yelling in Russian over the phone in the copy/fax room and never really did any coding. My dickhead boss, who also happened to hire his son-in-law, eventually moved her out of programming and made her the security admin.
Yes, she had obnoxiously huge breasts, but they matched the cellulite on her chubby ass. Why is it that these women like to wake up and dip themselves in spandex? The 90s are over and your fat ass does not to be seen, thank you.
This leads to Dick Asscock's principle: Talent (me) leaves [and goes into consulting] Mediocrity stays
Peace out, Dick Asscock, III
*I was later told that she shopped online for furniture during her offsite classes.
Admin
I keep feeling that way more and more as each day goes by. I'm a natural with computers, but the insanity level keeps rising with no end in sight. I just want to have fun in a job again. Argh!
Admin
Now that just isn't fair. I hear ole GW is an excellent Logo programmer. He has almost perfected the routine to write his first initial...
FORWARD 100 LEFT 90 FORWARD 100 LEFT 90 FORWARD 100 LEFT 90 FORWARD 100 LEFT 90
Admin
The surest way to never get promoted as a programmer is to be a really good programmer. The really good ones are never promoted away from the code.
Admin
The waves of competence in QA that couldn't detect the fact that her code was entirely non-functional?
Sounds like a company where competence is the exception rather than the rule, which would explain how she got the job (crappy interviewers will hire idiots) and non-existant QA to detect her incompetence.
It happens.
Admin
not to me unfortunately .
I just hope with all my heart this story is false.
Admin
Women shouldnt be programmers. The personality attributes needed to be a productive programmer are just not those typically found in women. Sorry, its the truth. There may be a small number who buck the trend here in there, but in general chicks cant code.
Mind you, I'm not saying all male programmers are good - most of them are clueless too. Women are just more likely to be clueless when it comes to programming. They make damn fine web designers though. Much better sense of color than most men, who are functionally color blind.
Admin
I would think, yes. There's a few other languages (like some of the proprietary db tools) that use a similar syntax, too.
Admin
Usually to you and me.
Best to ignore it and giggle a little bit.
Admin
What's sad is that if she was hot I wouldn't even care... my current job has absolutely no attractive chicks anywhere, it's pathetic. All the women are old or fat or Asian or some combination of those.
Admin
Admin
Unluckily, you're a moron.
I'm not quite sure where to start here, but "Women shouldn't be programmers?" Nah. You're a dickhead.
(Gliding insouciantly over "in general chicks cant code". Apparently dickheads can't apostrophise. How many tattoos you got on your nuts, big boy?)
In the ideal world, the only people who should be programmers are people who can write programs.
Simple, really, Not sexist, not racist, and it doesn't even preclude dickheads like you programming.
Incidentally, how does that line work for you in your local bar? "Y'know, chicks are great at lots of things, like ... um ... going down and ... um ... I kinda like that half-time thing they do at the Superbowl ... and ... urm ... ya wanna come back to my trailer and get bare nekkid with my pit bull terrier?"
Dickhead.
Admin
Admin
Admin
I figured the PC twits would jerk their knees over that.
Look, whether you want to accept it or not, its the truth. Contrary to what has been force fed by the feminists into everyone's minds over the past 50 years, men and women's brains are different. Each has their own strengths and weaknesses. There's a reason why most engineers and programmers are men, and its not because men are 'keeping the sistas down'. Its because men are better, on average, than women at those types of jobs. And women are better than men at many other jobs. And for some jobs its not a factor at all. There's the occasional outlier that breaks the averages, but as a general rule its true.
You can let reality seep through that little PC bubble you live in or not, I dont care. You're the one denying reality, not me. And calling people names doesnt change that.
Admin
O_o
soon, Godwin point, i fear..
Admin
Admin
Great story, Hansel.
Admin
You mean, tits?
That is, she also could have been a fast learner, or just was good at getting people do as she told them (didn't they actually do the programming for her?)... but, oh man, isn't it good to throw some tits at customer relations.
Admin
There are a good number of female workers around us, as well. From what little interaction I have with them, they appear to be generally hard workers, skilled at their jobs.
And then there is the 90 lb. twentysomething blonde beauty with the best c-cups daddy's money could buy, who spends at least an hour and a half a day flirting with guys at the coffee machine. No exaggeration. My desk is closest to that machine, and I have to try to ignore the conversations so I can focus on my work. She spends 20 or 30 minutes over here yakking away at least three times a day. Eventually it all starts to sound like: "Here, doggies. Want a treat? Teehee." "Rolf! Rolf!"
There was also the statuesque redhead, already tall and rendered taller by her ever-present 4-inch heels. Promoted to a management position after three months as a "project manager" (nobody can recall her ever managing a project), she spent a year parading through the aisles, fluffing her waist-length flaming hair and moving with thought-destroying undulation for the benefit of all us males. Nobody can recall her managing anything during that time, either. We used to ask each other, "What exactly is her job description, anyway?" I wonder why she didn't just go ahead and become a model, and be done with it. She had no business being here. Somebody finally figured that out, and now she's gone.
Admin
You know, it's getting a bit old that just about every female pseudonym you're using, or at least a substantial percentage of them, is attached to an inept idiot.
It's hard enough for the few women who actually manage to break through into a technical field -- do you really feel that your sexist thigh-slapping is worth alienating those who read this blog?
Admin
You know who else felt that way about women? Yeah Hitler, thats who!
[felt the urge to godwin the thread]
Now for a side comment. A joke my friend told me today. "Yeah I went the computer science route to meet the women who did it! Both of them."
Admin
She can't really code and she got promoted? She must have nice big boobs
Admin
I have had one female coworker by the way that was a programmer. She was good at her job, had more education then me, and made about half as much I later learned.
She made more as a waitress after she left the company. I always thought she should have sued.
Admin
That's a load of crap. Of course women are different, and yes, most women aren't good at programming, just like most men. Thing is, you can't apply your general rule to the woman applying to a job - you have to judge them as an individual, and it's far more than the occassional outlier that's qualified. It's probably only the outliers that are qualified and willing to put up with the BS that goes with software jobs.
Admin
That can't be true...
Admin
Wait! I'm not the only one who thinks like this. I love programming but the industry is so crazy that it makes me think of trying something completely different.
Admin
You know, I see a lot more MEN's names show up here, so I will assume that most inept programmers are men.
Why is it always gotta go sexist when a woman's name is mentioned? I've seen a shitload of incredibly incompetent men get promoted into positions they didn't deserve, & nobody said anything about their looks.