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Admin
I must have that where did you get it?
Admin
hot water costs money
captcha -> damnum
Admin
You mean oxygen.
Admin
FOUL!!! Only bobby drop-tables XKCD references are allowed on this site
Admin
"Pencils (3??)"
I wonder if the double question mark denotes incredulity or lack of confidence?
Admin
I notice that spatulas aren't on the list. I'll have to head over there on my lunch break.
Admin
If that doesn't work, narrow your search down with the words "Spotty" and "Herbert."
For those wondering why I've snipped the artwork, here's a clue: it's a URL, dummy. And no fair winding back to the original post. Not that you could do that with your pants round your ankles.
Admin
LOL, we had to start rationing rubber bands 2 weeks ago. very scary indeed.
Jiff www.anonymize.us.tc
Admin
Admin
My office looks like a stationary store. God forbid I should need a blue #37 colored pen and have to settle for blue #35.....lol
Admin
I've used hundreds of paperclips. First you straighten them into little spears and then you have contests with coworkers to see who could flick the most into the drop tile ceiling. You can do relay races, timed competitions, or whatever. The possibilities are endless.
Admin
Why, you pull it off because you finish.
captcha inhibeo, how strangely fitting
Admin
Admin
Years ago I wored for a smallish software house when they hired a new accounting manager. One of her first acts was to look over the "office supplies" usage. She figured out that everyone was stealing floppy disks. How did she figure that out? The company had only 30 employees and was going through over 100, sometimes as many as 200, floppies per month! She had worked for years using only two floppies (one for her files, and a second as backup), so clearly they were being stolen!
She implimented a policy where managers (only managers) had to come to her to request diskettes, with a signed form explaining what the disks were for. If a regular employee needed a disk she had to go to her manager, who then had to fill out a form and go to accounting.
The company developed semi-custom systems (software and hardware, yeah...semi-custom hardware) which were deployed all over the USA. When software updates were made we would generate an update floppy disk to send to the customre (sometimes via next day delivery) and of course we would save off a second copy of the update disk in our archive so we knew exactly what was sent to them and could send another copy if needed. The updates were set up to be run sequentially if there was an issue.. get the hardware running then run all the updates and you would have a working system again.
Any guess as to where all those "stolen" disks were going?
The best part: When that was pointed out to her she insisted that the "loss rate" was unacceptable and people must be stealing diskettes. The managers got tired of it in about a week and started handing out blank signed forms. I was back in her office constantly so she could hand me my two disks for an update and grill me about why they were needed. Eventually she started to realize that she was being an ass but she never completely backed down (never admitted error).
I cited the floppy policy as a reason when I quit.
Admin
LIES!
And if you don't stop "that", you'll go blind.
Admin
Dear William.
I've spend the last 45 minutes inventorying my cubical as directed, during which time I identified excess office supplies with an approximate value of $2.13.
My timesheet for the week reflects that I had to charge the equivalent of $80 (with full overhead accounted) of billable time to the overhead number instead of to a customer.
Admin
LMAO at this. Seriously, I'm dying over here.
Admin
Is it just me or is that page broken? I get gibberish starting with BZh91AY&SY3H but other pages on xkcd are working fine. I'll check when I get to work (about to leave) but then we use the same ISP with the same transparent proxy server so I don't know...
Admin
I've been here 18 years and used maybe three bars.
And I "inherited" my box of staples from my predecessor.
Admin
Admin
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tipp-Ex
I was curious as well. It appears to be some sort of brand of white-out that they use across the pond. I was going to check through the messages to see if anyone else clarified this before my reply post, but this topic seems to have already generated hundreds of comments..
Admin
I call shenanigans! Nobody who isn't in IT makes backups.
Admin
Check comment #217553.
Floppies; staples: it's all the same.
Personally, I go through a shitload of staples because (unlike most of my peers) I produce documentation.
Admin
Okay, here we go:
DOK-YOU-MEN-TAY-SHEE-ON
Meeting agendas and previous minutes. Cheat sheets/ quick reference sheets. Maps. Proposals to managers. Instructions to others who usually not have access to the same electronic resources I do.
The last of those is pretty much the biggest staple consumer.
The smallest consumer? My resume.
Admin
Admin
At the company I work for, any copier/printer/fax paper that has only been printed on one side and doesn't contain confidential info is required to be placed in a box printed side up to be loaded into the fax machine. This makes for some extra time wasting fun deciding which side of the page contains the fax.
The office manager actually makes a big deal and will try to track the culprit down when he finds paper only printed on one side in the recycle bin.
I recognize that its important to watch your costs... but c'mon...
Admin
I'm at work now and it's working. Must have been a glitch in the Matrix.
Admin
Standard syntax from a command line designates ? as a single wild card right? Which means that when it says:
Pencils (3??)
you are able to have 3ZZ pencils. Using basic schooling (Z being the 26th letter) you are allowed 2028 pencols. I sincerly hope you find pencil no. 2029 and return it forthwith.
Admin
When we go into a team meeting, it's generally whatever our manager has to say (he's a good manager, and takes very little time to update us on current company events) plus whatever each of us has to say about what we're working on now. This originally was supposed to be just a chance for anybody to bring up any issues they were having problems with; but it's evolved into "Oh gawd, everybody else is telling where they are in their projects, so I gotta say something, too" and now we go around the room blabbing for 5+ minutes apiece and not listening to each other, even though our patient manager knows where we all are because of our use of TFS (Team Foundation System).
Speaking of which... that's where the DOK-YOU-MEN-TAY-SHEE-ON goes. Slow to pick up on that, are you? Or are you just fighting an uphill battle against forces with more power and less vision than you?
At the end of our team meeting, we pick up our unused notepads and used coffee cups, smile at each other, and file out, still not having punched a single staple.
Admin
Once again you show yourself to be one of those elitists who feels that the only way to win is to be in direct competition with your own employer. Try working with them, put in some extra effort and see it rewarded.
Admin
Admin
Admin
do the clips count if they are attached to paper? and who the hell actually counts paper clips?
Admin
IMO, this does not seem unreasonable, he has a suggested a quantity of the item listed, which actually seems very fair, the email does not say it will be strictly enforced.
I think this type of email is directed towards the type of people that have 12 pen boxes of red and blue pens, two bags of rubber bands, four boxes of staples, etc sitting in ther drawers or at home. Is it too much to expect that an employee use office supplies responsibly and not steal them?
Admin
Try Google for "mouse pad defender beauty"
Admin
At my office we got a mail that we were not allowed to charge our mobile phones at the office. Because it was using to much energy.
But they didn't mind that the lights couldn't be turned off, and had the be turned on 24/7 even when nobody was in the building.
Admin
Honestly not being rude here, but I don't understand this comment. I did a quick Google for "enache roi" but it told me it only searched in English. Are you just not in your native language? I don't mean to be rude!
Admin
I meant to this comment btw
Admin
Here the chatter is about one of the projects 6 months over deadline on R1 and somewhere between 20 and 30 million over budget (USD) but I'm kind of glad that's the problem here and not office-supplies. Makes you wonder though when the company I work for have hired 10 consultants to oversight the project which fly up here every week, stay at a suite at a hotell for 3-4 days then fly back down to where they actually work. Oh did I mention it'll last for like 6 months? >_<
Admin
On that note, my first job was at a company which asked that I redesign the software I was working on as an intern as it used too many floppies (it kept report data as spreadsheets, for some unknown reason databases weren't part of the palette of choices). $50 worth: 5 floppies for distribution, 5 for a backup of the application (this was before office networks and source control). I had the supply person, the HR girl, and the local veep drop by my office to tell me that my request for floppies was excessive; I wonder how much our time was valued at ?
Admin
Admin
Admin
Admittedly, the typing error that changes enhance to enanche has involved the h traveling more than the customary single character right-or-left, but to suggest that this indicates that aaawww has a low proficiency in English, does seem a bit rude.
Anyway, surely you can't have missed all of those "Oxford Study" eimals taht siad taht it olny mtatres taht the frist and lsat ltteers are in the rghit pcale.
Admin
Look at it this way: if you were required to pay for office supplies out of your salary, I imagine you'd be a hell of a lot more careful. OR, if you were allocated a notional $100/£100 at the start of the year and got to keep the balance less office supply costs at the end of the year, I imagine you'd keep an eye on it too.
Don't knock people who want to control unnecessary costs - they're the ones arguing that developers shouldn't be cut, and that fixed costs should be squeezed instead.
Admin
"Pencils (3??)"
The double question marks are clearly there to prevent a NullPencilException being thrown
Admin
Notepad... Waster, just use the back of requirement docs.
Admin
Admin
Admin
It is reasonable, to some extend. Being the one who coded the internal app used for office supply requests, including approval cycles, on-time stock and pricing of each item and such, I have a pretty good perception these costs.
OTOH, you're never too low on the food chain to notice how much cash is wasted on so-called representative and corporate image costs. What's with the CFO, who barely sees a customer, driving a company owned, high powered luxury car, all operating expenses paid? Never mind that said car is mostly used for his commute and private weekend trips. :(
Admin
You needed to put it through babelfish: enanche roi = enhance Return On Investment