• SmittyBoy (unregistered) in reply to Sergey

    that's the first thing that came to mind for me too.

  • trtrwtf (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    Allow me to explain: sometimes women "douche" (or clean if you like) in their special place. The backwash (including all the nastiness, bacteria, etc. they were cleaning out) *can* sometimes go into a bag of sorts for later disposal.

    Um, I don't think that you've got that quite right. I could be wrong, being, as it were, not a chick, but I think if you asked an actual female person whether she'd ever placed the "backwash (including all the nastiness)" in a "bag of sorts for later disposal" you might learn something new.

  • Jon (unregistered) in reply to asciiart
    asciiart:
    (too late, took a while to write it)

    banner -c 1 FIRST | tr ' ' 0 doesn't take that long to write... :)

  • (cs) in reply to trtrwtf
    trtrwtf:
    C-Octothorpe:
    Allow me to explain: sometimes women "douche" (or clean if you like) in their special place. The backwash (including all the nastiness, bacteria, etc. they were cleaning out) *can* sometimes go into a bag of sorts for later disposal.

    Um, I don't think that you've got that quite right. I could be wrong, being, as it were, not a chick, but I think if you asked an actual female person whether she'd ever placed the "backwash (including all the nastiness)" in a "bag of sorts for later disposal" you might learn something new.

    Same thing here, not a chick, but dude, just trust me on this one... I'm not saying all of it goes back in, but some of it can accidentally go back in the "bag", which is used to "apply" it. Let's just leave it at that, really...

  • trtrtrtrtrwtf (unregistered) in reply to trtrwtf
    trtrwtf:
    Um, I don't think that you've got that quite right. I could be wrong, being, as it were, not a chick, but I think if you asked an actual female person whether she'd ever placed the "backwash (including all the nastiness)" in a "bag of sorts for later disposal" you might learn something new.

    They don't dispose of it? Do they drink it?

    Lunch time!

  • Meep (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe

    Yes, for the love of God and all that is holy, please.

  • trtrwtf (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    Same thing here, not a chick, but dude, just trust me on this one... I'm not saying all of it goes back in, but some of it can accidentally go back in the "bag", which is used to "apply" it. Let's just leave it at that, really...

    I see... your original description suggested a special bag, purpose-made for collecting the effluvium, which seemed like one of those strange misunderstandings that one acquires in childhood and carries around unquestioned throughout one's life. Not that I've ever had one of those, mind you.

  • (cs) in reply to trtrwtf
    trtrwtf:
    C-Octothorpe:
    Same thing here, not a chick, but dude, just trust me on this one... I'm not saying all of it goes back in, but some of it can accidentally go back in the "bag", which is used to "apply" it. Let's just leave it at that, really...

    I see... your original description suggested a special bag, purpose-made for collecting the effluvium, which seemed like one of those strange misunderstandings that one acquires in childhood and carries around unquestioned throughout one's life. Not that I've ever had one of those, mind you.

    Me neither... Now let us never discuss this in such detail ever again.

  • swahl (unregistered) in reply to Herby
    Herby:
    Zeros and Ones take up different sized space. I sometimes wish for everything to be a monospaced font like it was in the 60's.

    Hmm, I thought all numerals were supposed to be the same width even in proportionally spaced fonts; otherwise, lining up tables of numbers doesn't work.

    1234567890 1111111111 0000000000

    It depends on the font on your comptuer of course, but does that line up for you? There's no monospace / code tags here. Not that I put in anyway.

  • trtrwtf (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    Me neither... Now let us never discuss this in such detail *ever* again.

    Check. Added "vaginal effluvium" to "Topics not to be discussed".

    Though, come to think of it, I think that Vaginal Effluvium was the name of the third band on the bill when I went to hear the Little Snatches of Death and The League of Extraordinary Women Voters. (I think Cunt Chocula was also supposed to be on the bill, but they couldn't make it)

  • (cs) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    trtrwtf:
    C-Octothorpe:
    Allow me to explain: sometimes women "douche" (or clean if you like) in their special place. The backwash (including all the nastiness, bacteria, etc. they were cleaning out) *can* sometimes go into a bag of sorts for later disposal.

    Um, I don't think that you've got that quite right. I could be wrong, being, as it were, not a chick, but I think if you asked an actual female person whether she'd ever placed the "backwash (including all the nastiness)" in a "bag of sorts for later disposal" you might learn something new.

    Same thing here, not a chick, but dude, just trust me on this one... I'm not saying all of it goes back in, but some of it can accidentally go back in the "bag", which is used to "apply" it. Let's just leave it at that, really...
    Backdouche.

    And now I've puked in my lunch.

  • (cs) in reply to hoodaticus
    hoodaticus:
    C-Octothorpe:
    trtrwtf:
    C-Octothorpe:
    Allow me to explain: sometimes women "douche" (or clean if you like) in their special place. The backwash (including all the nastiness, bacteria, etc. they were cleaning out) *can* sometimes go into a bag of sorts for later disposal.

    Um, I don't think that you've got that quite right. I could be wrong, being, as it were, not a chick, but I think if you asked an actual female person whether she'd ever placed the "backwash (including all the nastiness)" in a "bag of sorts for later disposal" you might learn something new.

    Same thing here, not a chick, but dude, just trust me on this one... I'm not saying all of it goes back in, but some of it can accidentally go back in the "bag", which is used to "apply" it. Let's just leave it at that, really...
    Backdouche.

    And now I've puked in my lunch.

    Two things to never do while reading TDWTF:

    1. Eat
    2. Drink coffee (especially for those who can have coffee coming out of "several" orifices)

    Wow, and all this without the "help" of zunesis.

  • See-Cuntoscope (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    trtrwtf:
    C-Octothorpe:
    Same thing here, not a chick, but dude, just trust me on this one... I'm not saying all of it goes back in, but some of it can accidentally go back in the "bag", which is used to "apply" it. Let's just leave it at that, really...

    I see... your original description suggested a special bag, purpose-made for collecting the effluvium, which seemed like one of those strange misunderstandings that one acquires in childhood and carries around unquestioned throughout one's life. Not that I've ever had one of those, mind you.

    Me neither... Now let us never discuss this in such detail ever again.

    What, are you gay?

    You say you love women, but how can you love something you don't truly know? Shouldn't you be at least a little curious about those little things in their lives that you remain ignorant of?

    Perhaps the only way to really appreciate womanhood is to experience it yourself. Come here and let me use this douche on you. We can save the used liquid and you can splash it in my face while I touch myself.

  • zunesis (the real thang, baby) (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    Two things to never do while reading TDWTF: 1) Eat 2) Drink coffee (especially for those who can have coffee coming out of "several" orifices)

    Wow, and all this without the "help" of zunesis.

    Ha! You're even worse than me!

  • zunesis (the real thang, baby) (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    Two things to never do while reading TDWTF: 1) Eat 2) Drink coffee (especially for those who can have coffee coming out of "several" orifices)

    Wow, and all this without the "help" of zunesis.

    Actually, I did kind of start it. Guess I should learn more about how douches work. I've always wanted to try one.

    I should pick up a kit and a syringe - I wonder what it would be like for the "used" fluid to be injected straight into my viens... "heaven"? No ladies around, so I guess I'll try it out on my dog

  • Shinji (unregistered)

    Is there a reason this post didn't show up in the RSS feed?

  • (cs)

    OK this is BOGUS. You can't just go out and find something on the web somewhere and claim you found it "in the production environment" and send it to TDWTF as if it's your own. This is clearly from MazeSmith, and considering it's Javascript from 2005, it's not even that much of a WTF.

    http://mazesmith.sourceforge.net/

  • Nagesh (unregistered) in reply to jasmine2501
    jasmine2501:
    OK this is BOGUS. You can't just go out and find something on the web somewhere and claim you found it "in the production environment" and send it to TDWTF as if it's your own. This is clearly from MazeSmith, and considering it's Javascript from 2005, it's not even that much of a WTF.

    http://mazesmith.sourceforge.net/

    My team is nevering to copy any source code from the web, but that is excelent deal for U.S. shop.
  • (cs) in reply to zunesis (the real thang, baby)
    zunesis (the real thang:
    C-Octothorpe:
    Two things to never do while reading TDWTF: 1) Eat 2) Drink coffee (especially for those who can have coffee coming out of "several" orifices)

    Wow, and all this without the "help" of zunesis.

    Actually, I did kind of start it. Guess I should learn more about how douches work. I've always wanted to try one.

    I should pick up a kit and a syringe - I wonder what it would be like for the "used" fluid to be injected straight into my viens... "heaven"? No ladies around, so I guess I'll try it out on my dog

    Attention FBI - this guy is the next Jared Lautner. So watch out.

  • zunesis (the real thang, baby) (unregistered) in reply to hoodaticus
    hoodaticus:
    zunesis (the real thang:
    C-Octothorpe:
    Two things to never do while reading TDWTF: 1) Eat 2) Drink coffee (especially for those who can have coffee coming out of "several" orifices)

    Wow, and all this without the "help" of zunesis.

    Actually, I did kind of start it. Guess I should learn more about how douches work. I've always wanted to try one.

    I should pick up a kit and a syringe - I wonder what it would be like for the "used" fluid to be injected straight into my viens... "heaven"? No ladies around, so I guess I'll try it out on my dog

    Attention FBI - this guy is the next Jared Lautner. So watch out.
    I remember when they first showed his smiling mugshot on TV, I just blurted out "This guy's my hero!" and my mother looked up from her crossword with this weird look. I didn't know what she was thinking, but just in case, I made an example out of her cat. BY FACE-FUCKING IT TO DEATH! HA HA HA!

    Anyways, maybe FBI surveillance is just what I need. I have people paying attention to me 24/7 and I can do all kinds of weird shit and they'll have to watch.

    Imagine - one day I come home carrying a mannequin, a chainsaw, a case of lube, a dildo with a nail spike on the end, and some fried chicken. Just before I close the door, I toss the unlabeled white van across the street a saucy smile...

  • trtrwtf (unregistered) in reply to zunesis (the real thang, baby)
    zunesis (the real thang:

    Imagine - one day I come home carrying a mannequin, a chainsaw, a case of lube, a dildo with a nail spike on the end, and some fried chicken. Just before I close the door, I toss the unlabeled white van across the street a saucy smile...

    What do you need with the lube, when you've got the fried chicken?

  • zunesis (the real thang, baby) (unregistered) in reply to trtrwtf
    trtrwtf:
    zunesis (the real thang:

    Imagine - one day I come home carrying a mannequin, a chainsaw, a case of lube, a dildo with a nail spike on the end, and some fried chicken. Just before I close the door, I toss the unlabeled white van across the street a saucy smile...

    What do you need with the lube, when you've got the fried chicken?

    Well, it's a little hard to grease my kitchen floor with fried chicken! Duh!

  • trtrwtf (unregistered) in reply to zunesis (the real thang, baby)
    zunesis (the real thang:
    Well, it's a little hard to grease my kitchen floor with fried chicken! Duh!

    You need a better quality fried chicken.

  • (cs) in reply to trtrwtf
    trtrwtf:
    zunesis (the real thang:
    Well, it's a little hard to grease my kitchen floor with fried chicken! Duh!

    You need a better quality fried chicken.

    And you forgot the car battery too... Amature.

  • zunesis (the real thang, baby) (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    trtrwtf:
    zunesis (the real thang:
    Well, it's a little hard to grease my kitchen floor with fried chicken! Duh!

    You need a better quality fried chicken.

    And you forgot the car battery too... Amature.
    I infer that there are professionals. Is there some sort of league or certification I can get into?

    I'm told I'm already certifiable, so actually getting the piece of paper shouldn't be too hard.

  • trtrwtf (unregistered) in reply to zunesis (the real thang, baby)
    zunesis (the real thang:
    C-Octothorpe:
    trtrwtf:
    zunesis (the real thang:
    Well, it's a little hard to grease my kitchen floor with fried chicken! Duh!

    You need a better quality fried chicken.

    And you forgot the car battery too... Amature.
    I infer that there are professionals. Is there some sort of league or certification I can get into?

    I'm told I'm already certifiable, so actually getting the piece of paper shouldn't be too hard.

    I dunno, I'm not sure you've got what it takes. C-Octo's right, you did forget the car battery. And what about the marmalade?

  • (cs) in reply to zunesis (the real thang, baby)
    zunesis (the real thang:
    hoodaticus:
    zunesis (the real thang:
    C-Octothorpe:
    Two things to never do while reading TDWTF: 1) Eat 2) Drink coffee (especially for those who can have coffee coming out of "several" orifices)

    Wow, and all this without the "help" of zunesis.

    Actually, I did kind of start it. Guess I should learn more about how douches work. I've always wanted to try one.

    I should pick up a kit and a syringe - I wonder what it would be like for the "used" fluid to be injected straight into my viens... "heaven"? No ladies around, so I guess I'll try it out on my dog

    Attention FBI - this guy is the next Jared Lautner. So watch out.
    I remember when they first showed his smiling mugshot on TV, I just blurted out "This guy's my hero!" and my mother looked up from her crossword with this weird look. I didn't know what she was thinking, but just in case, I made an example out of her cat. BY FACE-FUCKING IT TO DEATH! HA HA HA!

    Anyways, maybe FBI surveillance is just what I need. I have people paying attention to me 24/7 and I can do all kinds of weird shit and they'll have to watch.

    Imagine - one day I come home carrying a mannequin, a chainsaw, a case of lube, a dildo with a nail spike on the end, and some fried chicken. Just before I close the door, I toss the unlabeled white van across the street a saucy smile...

    Okay, that was disturbingly funny.

  • zunesis (the real thang, baby) (unregistered) in reply to trtrwtf
    trtrwtf:
    zunesis (the real thang:
    C-Octothorpe:
    trtrwtf:
    zunesis (the real thang:
    Well, it's a little hard to grease my kitchen floor with fried chicken! Duh!

    You need a better quality fried chicken.

    And you forgot the car battery too... Amature.
    I infer that there are professionals. Is there some sort of league or certification I can get into?

    I'm told I'm already certifiable, so actually getting the piece of paper shouldn't be too hard.

    I dunno, I'm not sure you've got what it takes. C-Octo's right, you did forget the car battery. And what about the marmalade?

    Don't need marmalade for this procedure. Marmalade's only for the ass.

    You don't even know what the fried chicken's for do you?

  • (cs) in reply to zunesis (the real thang, baby)
    zunesis (the master debater:
    You don't even know what the fried chicken's for do you?
    Eating?
  • Sigivald (unregistered) in reply to swahl

    Some typefaces (such as the ones chosen for default use by web browsers!) might well work that way, but the problem is that for the vastly more common case of numbers not in tables you end up with ridiculously bad kerning.

    Looks good on a webpage for general purpose use, looks like ass in a book.

    The solution is to use monospaced typefaces for your tables (or software that will fake it up by doing one character at a time in a grid).

  • zunesis (the real thang, baby) (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    zunesis (i love the sight of my own penis):
    You don't even know what the fried chicken's for do you?
    Eating?
    You wish.

    Obviously, if you didn't overlook the fact that the dildo has a spike on the end, it's so I can stab the mannequin with the point of the dildo and suck the balls end at the same time. Fried chicken grease gives it more flavor (and because I like to think of it as a black man). The greased kitchen floor is so I can toss the running chainsaw around and have it bounce off the walls while also trying to protect my beloved (but short-lived) plastic lady from that danger, which gives one quite a thrill. Then, realizing what I've become, I chop up the mannequin with the chainsaw in a vain attempt to symbolically destroy my own perversions and just end up jerking off to regular porn (sweet release!). If mom's in the room, I just tell her: "Friday." and she starts obediently undressing whilst also cowering in fear, which I love. If anyone in the house has clothes on, it just ruins it for me.

    Repeat every Friday evening.

  • zunesis (the real thang, baby) (unregistered) in reply to zunesis (the real thang, baby)
    zunesis (the real thang:
    C-Octothorpe:
    zunesis (i love the sight of my own penis):
    You don't even know what the fried chicken's for do you?
    Eating?
    You wish.

    Obviously, if you didn't overlook the fact that the dildo has a spike on the end, it's so I can stab the mannequin with the point of the dildo and suck the balls end at the same time. Fried chicken grease gives it more flavor (and because I like to think of it as a black man). The greased kitchen floor is so I can toss the running chainsaw around and have it bounce off the walls while also trying to protect my beloved (but short-lived) plastic lady from that danger, which gives one quite a thrill. Then, realizing what I've become, I chop up the mannequin with the chainsaw in a vain attempt to symbolically destroy my own perversions and just end up jerking off to regular porn (sweet release!). If mom's in the room, I just tell her: "Friday." and she starts obediently undressing whilst also cowering in fear, which I love. If anyone in the house has clothes on, it just ruins it for me.

    Repeat every Friday evening.

    Wait, I left some stuff out... aw, it can wait.

  • See-Cuntoscope (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    trtrwtf:
    zunesis (the real thang:
    Well, it's a little hard to grease my kitchen floor with fried chicken! Duh!

    You need a better quality fried chicken.

    And you forgot the car battery too... Amature.

    Pffft. I'm a Level 53 Pervert. I don't fuck anything that still has a face.

  • (cs) in reply to intertravel
    intertravel:
    hoodaticus:
    Embedded System FTW:
    Ok, so it's a slot machine--an embedded system with no file system after all!
    My spoo has too much fleem:
    Here are the shapes. This doesn't seem like a WTF without more context.
    Shape 2:
    ............###............
    .........#########.........
    .......#############.......
    .....#################.....
    ....###################....
    ...#####################...
    ...#####################...
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    .#########################.
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    ...#####################...
    ...#####################...
    ....###################....
    .....#################.....
    .......#############.......
    .........#########.........
    ............###............
    
    
    Shape 3:
    .........##.........
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    ..################..
    ...##############...
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    .....##########.....
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    Shape 4:
    ####............####
    #####..........#####
    ######........######
    #######......#######
    .#######....#######.
    ..#######..#######..
    ...##############...
    ....############....
    .....##########.....
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    ..#######..#######..
    .#######....#######.
    #######......#######
    ######........######
    #####..........#####
    ####............####
    
    
    Shape 5:
    ############.....######......
    #....#######......####.......
    #....########......##........
    #....########..##..##........
    #....########..##..##........
    ########################.....
    ##########################...
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    #########################....
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    ##########################...
    ###########################..
    ############################.
    #############################
    ...#####.#####.#####.#####...
    ....###...###...###...###....
    
    
    Shape 6:
    ...###.............###...
    ..######.........######..
    .#########.....#########.
    .#########.....#########.
    .##########...##########.
    .##########...##########.
    .###########.###########.
    ..######################.
    ...####################..
    .....###############.....
    ........#########........
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    ..#####################..
    ..#####################..
    .#######################.
    .#########.###.#########.
    .#########.###.#########.
    .########..###..########.
    .#######...###...#######.
    ..#####....###....#####..
    ...###.....###.....###...
    ...........###...........
    ...........###...........
    
    
    Shape 7:
    ............###............
    .........#########.........
    .......#############.......
    .....#################.....
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    ...#####################...
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    ..######...#####...######..
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    .####..#############..####.
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    ..#####.............#####..
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    ............###............
    
    
    Shape 8:
    ######..................######
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    ..######..............######..
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    ............######............
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    Shape 9:
    ..............##..............
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    Shape 10:
    #################################################
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    #.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#
    #################################################
    #.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#
    #################################################
    #.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#
    #################################################
    #.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#
    #################################################
    #.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#.#
    #################################################
    
    
    Shape 11:
    .......................####.......................
    ...................############...................
    ................##################................
    ..............######################..............
    ............##########################............
    ..........##############################..........
    .........################################.........
    ........##################################........
    .......####################################.......
    ......######################################......
    .....########################################.....
    .....########################################.....
    ....##########################################....
    ....##########################################....
    ...############################################...
    ...############################################...
    ..##############################################..
    ..##############################################..
    ..##############################################..
    .################################################.
    .################################################.
    .################################################.
    .################################################.
    ##################################################
    ##################################################
    ##################################################
    ##################################################
    .################################################.
    .################################################.
    .################################################.
    .################################################.
    ..##############################################..
    ..##############################################..
    ..##############################################..
    ...############################################...
    ...############################################...
    ....##########################################....
    ....##########################################....
    .....########################################.....
    .....########################################.....
    ......######################################......
    .......####################################.......
    ........##################################........
    .........################################.........
    ..........##############################..........
    ............##########################............
    ..............######################..............
    ................##################................
    ...................############...................
    .......................####.......................
    
    
    Shape 12:
    ........................##........................
    ........................##........................
    .......................####.......................
    .......................####.......................
    ......................######......................
    ......................######......................
    .....................########.....................
    .....................########.....................
    ....................##########....................
    ....................##########....................
    ...................############...................
    ...................############...................
    ..................##############..................
    ..................##############..................
    .................################.................
    .................################.................
    ................##################................
    ................##################................
    ...............####################...............
    ...............####################...............
    ..............######################..............
    ..............######################..............
    .............########################.............
    .............########################.............
    ............##########################............
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    ...........############################...........
    ...........############################...........
    ..........##############################..........
    ..........##############################..........
    .........################################.........
    .........################################.........
    ........##################################........
    ........##################################........
    .......####################################.......
    .......####################################.......
    ......######################################......
    ......######################################......
    .....########################################.....
    .....########################################.....
    ....##########################################....
    ....##########################################....
    ...############################################...
    ...############################################...
    ..##############################################..
    ..##############################################..
    .################################################.
    .################################################.
    ##################################################
    ##################################################
    
    Ugh. Comments like this make me go to stackoverflow and start helping people. See what you've driven me to!

    I wish people would stop quoting the entirety of this very long post. It's a bit annoying.

    ............###............ .........#########......... .......#############....... .....#################..... ....###################.... ...#####################... ...#####################... ..######...#####...######.. ..######...#####...######.. .#########################. .#########################. .#########################. ########################### ########################### ########################### .####.###############.####. .####..#############..####. .#####..###########..#####. ..#####.............#####.. ..######...........######.. ...#####################... ...#####################... ....###################.... .....#################..... .......#############....... .........#########......... ............###............

  • silly billy (unregistered) in reply to craig
    craig:
    your_name:
    mt:
    Tim:
    Robo:
    asciiart:
    00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 00111111111000011100000111111110000000011111110001111111111100 00111000000000011100000111001111000000111000000000000111000000 00111000000000011100000111001110000000111000000000000111000000 00111111100000011100000111111111000000011111100000000111000000 00111000000000011100000111000011100000000001110000000111000000 00111000000000011100000111000001110000000001110000000111000000 00111000000000011100000111000001110000111111100000000111000000 00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

    (too late, took a while to write it)

    You sir, have made my day. I would love to see the twisted logic to turn this string array into (I assume) some sort of bitmap mask.

    banner FIRST | sed 's/ /0' | sed 's/#/1'

    or something like that I would imagine

    banner FIRST | sed 's/ /0/g'| sed 's/X/1/g'

    banner FIRST | sed 's/ /0/g;s/X/1/g'

    Less processes, more performance!

    None of these will do what is intended (unless I'm missing the fact that they are all intended to not modify the output of "banner FIRST").

    The correct form for a global sed expression is 's/text to replace/replacement text/g'

    So the X should be #.

    Even So, this will only make a start, the left most line will be 1's and the rightmost character in each line will be too....

  • wisi (unregistered) in reply to ted
    ted:
    My spoo has too much fleem:
    Its all good.

    It was only a two minute, quick 'n dirty perl script

    (oops I said perl. Am I unclean now?)

    I didn't even click on the link and knew it was some fag linking xkcd. It's not clever. It's not funny. Just the word "perl" with a link under it and the short, useless, one sentence post was all I needed to know that you were linking the cartoon where the programmers sword-fight on chairs (and iteratively one-up each other on how they could make a "frist" post using Linux utilities).

    It was funny to read when it came out. It's even funny when clicking on the Random button on the site and seeing it. It's NOT funny when someone links to it from a one-sentence post and thinks they're so fucking clever to have discovered xkcd.

    You probably still use lmgtfy and think you're so damn clever.

    It means in real life, you're an unoriginal hipster doofus.

    Got anything to do with sanitizing inputs to a SQL database, etc.? Link to Bobby Tables. Got a nerd-project slow-ass turing machine? Like a minecraft logic circuit from redstone? Link to the one where it's some guy alone in the world making a computer out of rocks. Got a story about password security or encryption? Link to the one where they beat the password out of the guy with a wrench.

    Fuck off. You're not clever.

    I found it amusing.

    Perhaps, if you knew not just that it was and xkcd link, but the specific one, you should have been clever enough to simply ignore it.

  • Simon Singh (unregistered) in reply to ParkinT
    ParkinT:
    MEMO - All Staffers

    RE: WikiLeak of latest encryption method

    HOW DID OUR LATEST KWANTUM ENCRYPTION SCHEME GET LEAKED TO THE MEDIA?!!

    I WANT ANSWERS!! NOW !!

    --General Relativity USAF, RFD, LOL, LSMFT

    Uhm, isn't the whole thing with Quantum Cryptography that Alice and Bob agree on a key that Oscar can never know (short of guessing), and that even if he manages to guess the key and decipher the message, his intrusion (even observation) is immediately detectable.

  • Lionel Hutz (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    H. Worthington:
    C-Octothorpe:
    zunesis is a pederast with OCD (and lets face it, probably a touch of the downs too)
    You could be brought up on charges for making claims like this here in Britain. Thank the Jeffersons for your free-Yankee-speech. I can see how valuable it is to you.
    Slander isn't illegal if it's true, you douchebag! See what I mean?
    Apparently, that's not quite true (he says without finding a contrary reference - in fact, Wikipedia out and out disagrees).

    I remember someone telling me that there was a case where any question of truth in the statement was irrelevant, and that (in this case) a true statement was considered slanderous because of the negative affect it had on the plaintif's reputation, and the resulting impact on his life (and I thought it was a US example {other than Noonan v Staples}) Maybe they were wrong and were making things up, but I felt it importnat to share.

  • mememe (unregistered) in reply to C-Octothorpe
    C-Octothorpe:
    Whore that's Worthamillion:
    C-Octothorpe:
    Slander isn't illegal if it's true, you collection of feminine hygiene products! See what I mean?

    It is just not the same when you spell out what it is, is it?

    Um, no, that's not what it is...

    Allow me to explain: sometimes women "douche" (or clean if you like) in their special place. The backwash (including all the nastiness, bacteria, etc. they were cleaning out) can sometimes go into a bag of sorts for later disposal. Now, by me calling him a "douche bag", I wasn't calling him a collection of feminine hygiene products, believe it or not. I was saying that he was worse (or equal to) a bag of fetid, bacteria ridden, vaginal washing by-product.

    I didn't know cunts were all that dirty....

  • (cs) in reply to Lionel Hutz
    Lionel Hutz:
    C-Octothorpe:
    H. Worthington:
    C-Octothorpe:
    zunesis is a pederast with OCD (and lets face it, probably a touch of the downs too)
    You could be brought up on charges for making claims like this here in Britain. Thank the Jeffersons for your free-Yankee-speech. I can see how valuable it is to you.
    Slander isn't illegal if it's true, you douchebag! See what I mean?
    Apparently, that's not quite true (he says without finding a contrary reference - in fact, Wikipedia out and out disagrees).

    I remember someone telling me that there was a case where any question of truth in the statement was irrelevant, and that (in this case) a true statement was considered slanderous because of the negative affect it had on the plaintif's reputation, and the resulting impact on his life (and I thought it was a US example {other than Noonan v Staples}) Maybe they were wrong and were making things up, but I felt it importnat to share.

    Speaking as a doctor of jurisprudence, I can tell you that truth is an absolute defense to defamation at all levels of government in the United States. It already was under the Common Law of England, and then we went and enacted the first amendment on top of it, just to make sure.

    The tricky part here is that it's an affirmative defense. This means that if you are sued for defamation, and you answer that the statement was true, you have to prove in court that it probably is true. Unless it's a public person, in which case they have to prove that it's probably false.

    Addendum (2011-07-19 18:37): The other tricky part is that if you say the statement is true and the other guy says it's false, you're going to trial. It won't get dismissed. And just think about what a nasty trial that would be.

  • Lionel Hutz (unregistered) in reply to hoodaticus
    hoodaticus:
    Lionel Hutz:
    C-Octothorpe:
    H. Worthington:
    C-Octothorpe:
    zunesis is a pederast with OCD (and lets face it, probably a touch of the downs too)
    You could be brought up on charges for making claims like this here in Britain. Thank the Jeffersons for your free-Yankee-speech. I can see how valuable it is to you.
    Slander isn't illegal if it's true, you douchebag! See what I mean?
    Apparently, that's not quite true (he says without finding a contrary reference - in fact, Wikipedia out and out disagrees).

    I remember someone telling me that there was a case where any question of truth in the statement was irrelevant, and that (in this case) a true statement was considered slanderous because of the negative affect it had on the plaintif's reputation, and the resulting impact on his life (and I thought it was a US example {other than Noonan v Staples}) Maybe they were wrong and were making things up, but I felt it importnat to share.

    Speaking as a doctor of jurisprudence, I can tell you that truth is an absolute defense to defamation at all levels of government in the United States. It already was under the Common Law of England, and then we went and enacted the first amendment on top of it, just to make sure.

    The tricky part here is that it's an affirmative defense. This means that if you are sued for defamation, and you answer that the statement was true, you have to prove in court that it probably is true. Unless it's a public person, in which case they have to prove that it's probably false.

    Addendum (2011-07-19 18:37): The other tricky part is that if you say the statement is true and the other guy says it's false, you're going to trial. It won't get dismissed. And just think about what a nasty trial that would be.

    Not having ever been to the US, and not being able to find any examples to backup my claims, I am forced to believe you.

  • Cheong (unregistered) in reply to Robo
    Robo:
    asciiart:
    00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 00111111111000011100000111111110000000011111110001111111111100 00111000000000011100000111001111000000111000000000000111000000 00111000000000011100000111001110000000111000000000000111000000 00111111100000011100000111111111000000011111100000000111000000 00111000000000011100000111000011100000000001110000000111000000 00111000000000011100000111000001110000000001110000000111000000 00111000000000011100000111000001110000111111100000000111000000 00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

    (too late, took a while to write it)

    You sir, have made my day. I would love to see the twisted logic to turn this string array into (I assume) some sort of bitmap mask.

    In order to make it faster, next time make good use of "banner"/"lpbanner" command with "sed".

  • Synchronos (unregistered) in reply to Sigivald
    Sigivald:
    The solution is to use monospaced typefaces for your tables (or software that will fake it up by doing one character at a time in a grid).

    Or better yet, use an application that can use OpenType features that most pro typefaces are built to support, and kerns both ways (eg. in InDesign "proportional" or "tabular" figures).

  • Frank (unregistered) in reply to Dank
    Dank:
    Frank:
    And you're a noob. The only one not familiar with ted posts around here is you.

    Seriously? You're defending that kind of abuse? Wow. Just wow.

  • Dank (unregistered) in reply to Frank
    Frank:
    Dank:
    Frank:
    And you're a noob. The only one not familiar with ted posts around here is you.

    Seriously? You're still unaware of that kind of joke? Wow. Just wow.

  • Hortical (unregistered) in reply to hoodaticus
    hoodaticus:
    The tricky part here is that it's an affirmative defense. This means that if you are sued for defamation, and you answer that the statement was true, you have to prove in court that it probably is true. Unless it's a public person, in which case they have to prove that it's probably false.

    If they're famous, they're guilty (of the accusation) until proven probably innocent?

  • Plank (unregistered) in reply to Frank
    Frank:
    Dank:
    Frank:
    And you're a noob. The only one not familiar with ted posts around here is you.

    Seriously? You're defending that kind of abuse? Wow. Just wow.

    It's OK man, I had Reese's for breakfast.

    P.S. Eat a dick

  • (cs) in reply to Hortical
    Hortical:
    hoodaticus:
    The tricky part here is that it's an affirmative defense. This means that if you are sued for defamation, and you answer that the statement was true, you have to prove in court that it probably is true. Unless it's a public person, in which case they have to prove that it's probably false.

    If they're famous, they're guilty (of the accusation) until proven probably innocent?

    And even at that point, nobody ever takes note of the fact that the accusations are untrue, at least not with the same vociferousness as with the original acusations.

    You're raped her, you rapist!! No I didn't, and here is proof, see? [shows undeniable proof] Sorry, did you say something, Mr. Rapist?

  • Dave (unregistered)

    Did somebody accidentally the new articles?

  • Frank (unregistered) in reply to Plank
    Plank:
    Frank:
    Dank:
    Frank:
    And you're a noob. The only one not familiar with ted posts around here is you.

    Seriously? You're defending that kind of abuse? Wow. Just wow.

    It's OK man, I had Reese's for breakfast.

    P.S. Eat a dick

    Haha. Yeah, right. And which one of us would be ashamed if their anonymity were suddenly wiped away? Hell, you might even lose your job or be expelled from school or have to take a nap without your blankey.

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